Tumblr Mock thread Revived!

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>>551092735
Yesterday I saw this cishit movie that promoted the patriarchy. In it Ryan Gosling swaggered about with his penis while the only female character looked sad and cared for her kid. Its obvious this movie has sexist undertones meant to brainwash the children of america. Hold me fellow feminists, whilst I suck on the teats of empowerment. Also someone said "bitch" in the movie. 0/10

>>551093315
I feel like this post is misogynistic and oppresses my trigender-omnisexual frog lifestyle

>>551093525
oMFG I CANT EVEN

>>551093639
I just
I cant

>tumblr thread
>nobody says "literally" ad nauseum
5/10 Thread's OK i guess

>>551093639
This needs an instagram
I cant even

>>551093705
>>551093639
>>551093525
I dont know how but in some way you all are oppressing me and by extension supporting the patriarchy. Check your privelages or else Im contacting a moderator.

MY FEELS

>>551093829
Bitch we're literally just getting started, literally

>>551093315
Also, a trigger warning would be nice next time. I felt like I was literally raped after reading this.....

OMFG THIS ^^^

>>551093973
WHY DID YOU SAY IT SO MANY TIMES

I

CAN'T

EVEN

Can we not...

>>551094176
this is literally a trigger for me
I literally just
Cant even...

omg so where is the starbucks?

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>>551093973
Oh my god you just said bitch, do you have any idea how demeaning a word like that is. Id ask you to check your privelage shitlord but you like probably wouldnt even know where to start. I bet youre happy having a penis and oppressing luscious women even though your genetically inferior. I dont even like know where to start bitch, GTFO you make me sick. I bet you would have voted against womens suffrage you capitalist, chauvinistic, heterosexual CIS SCUM.

btw check out my blog "AngryDykes4freedums"

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>>551092735

>>551092735
Fat people are beutifl

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>>551094443

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BFmV_rPzcGg

can you handle this much tumblr?

how about this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icQ1d0A9A1Q

literally guys it's literally way too much literally so much that i literally can't even right now literally

>>551094441
If you don't reblogged this unfollow me

>>551094441
OMG you just said dyke that word is such a trigger I cant even..

SUPERNATURAL FANDOM IS HERE!!!! We've got your back...AND A GIF FOR LITERALLY EVERYTHING!!!!

Ship this time a fucking 1000!!!!

>>551094473
Fuck you you little thin privilege shitlord i'm literally done

>>551094763
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3hcODVN4dRo

sorry i meant this video

literally tho xD

>>551094895
OMG IM DYINg
wHY ISNT THIS IN EVERY BLOG¡?

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>>551094443
>implying anyone would look at that ugly whore

>>551094763
Jesus fuck man this is a tumblr mock thread not a cringe-so-hard-i-shit-myself thread
XD

>Walking to supermarket to get cupcakes.
>My dumb mother drives me because it's more than 300m away.
>Raise thunderthighs(TM) to exit automobile.
>Car shakes violently.
>Level 1: Get to door.
Level 1 complete!
>Level 2: Get through door.
Level 2 complete!
>Level 3 Pass through gate.
Level 3 failed.
>Cry.gif
>Log on tumblr
>"thin privilege is being able to walk more than 300m"
>"thin privilege is not causing the car to have seizures"
>"thin privilege is being able to get cupcakes at the supermarket"

Ddevir

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OMG so hottt I luv blk dic. I hate white people so check ur privlage.
#sexiii #diewhitey

oMG CHECK YOUR PRIVELEGE YOu cishet scumm!!!!!!

I CAn't evne xD

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>>551094797
Its meant to be qausi-ironic parody of patriarchal americana. Its literally the best blog ever and if you dont follow it your probably a CISSHIT

sorry #notsorry

>>551095448
ARE YUO LE TURTEL !!!!????

>>551094763
also that walker kid sounds very autistic
Like mild-to-moderate aspergers syndrome autistic, not the whole low-functioning struggle to speak or look at anything autistic.

Honestly if this was like tumblr it would just be

[name] likes this
[name] likes this
[name] likes this
[name] likes this
[name] likes this

And I'm ashamed to have went on tumblr to know this.

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theres a blog thats strictly dedicated to writing teen inspirational/relationship quotes in black sharpie on random paint samples, one of the most annoying things ive seen on tumblr besides people taking pictures of their starbucks drinks and seeing 500K notes on it. too lazy to find the page and flood with pictures. but needless to say its horrid

>>551095529
This is
I just
I cant even

you guys know way too much about tumblr


closet tumblrfags abound itt

>>551095508
I literally can't even... Literally...

rape

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>>551092735
>>551093315
>>551093525
>>551093639
>>551093705
>>551093829
>>551093857
>>551093875
>>551093910
>>551093973
>>551094030
>>551094127
>>551094132
>>551094176
>>551094351
>>551094390
>>551094441
>>551094443
>check 'em
>>551094473
>>551094763
>>551094764
>>551094797
>>551094895
>>551094968
>>551095092
>>551095125
>>551095191
>>551095270
>>551095448
>>551095508

>>551095518
>>551095529
>>551095601
>>551095643
>>551095882
>>551095925
>>551096027
>>551096086
>>551096109
>>551096256

i regret nothing

>>551096086
I went on tumblr once and was disgusted out of my mind by what i found.
One redeeming quality about the place is that their porn is the best shit i'd ever seen

>>551095508

Literally died.

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>>551096086
By saying that something I like isnt something you like is not just oppressing me but the entire feminist culture. By disagreeing with me you are supporting the patriarchy and telling cisshits everywhere that its okay to own a penis in public. GTFO
Sorry #notsorry

>>551095601
Could you literally not?

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>>551094763
>all in all I hate this website. It reminds me too much of facebook and we can't have that in 2014

all of my lulz

Why are tumblr girls so odd? because they literally can't even xD

What does cis mean?

>>551097967
You don't know what CIS means?
Wow. Just. Wow.

>>551097967
you literally don't know what cis mean? you must be a cisscum. downvote this comment please.

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>>551098248

>>551097030
I kinda want to do something in response to the copypasta i've been seeing all over /b/
that shit about the fbi not shutting us down and we need to suffer so we can feel shit.

Last thread i said we should seek them out and just laugh at their posts like they said the funniest shit ever

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>>551098356

>>551098089
All I think of when I hear cis is the red faction in SW Battlefront 2. :(

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>>551098449

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>>551098539

>>551098418
What do you guys think?

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>>551098632

My ex-girlfriend used to act like this shit as social media started dominating her life.

Her favorite quotes
>stahp
>I can't even
>brb literally dying

And any quotes I would pull from this site to use in real life, she would start copying me (like saying feels, "is he kill", shit like that)

She cheated on me with some guy she met through tumblr that had a shared interest in her D&D club in college.

Moral of the story kiddos: Don't go for serious relationships with girls that visit tumblr as much as you visit /b/.

>>551098486
When i see cis i think incest

>>551095092
more please

>>551098756
Damn right.

did you just?

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>>551098716

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>>551099079

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>>551099175

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>>551099276

>>551095092
I know that girl personally. she is annoying AF but fun sexually.
She tried to pull me into this superfag game called IMVU and believe it or not she almost succeeded.
We nicknamed her nakia

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>>551099357

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>>551099439

>>551093525
im literally crying

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>>551099531

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>>551099608

>>551099608
that's your only fucking job

Dear tumblr,
There's a difference between "artistic"...
... and "autistic".
Just thought i should let you know.

>>551099901

CHECK EM

>>551098756
wh>>551099964
Look who it is again, ID Heaven. I'm fed up with your shit faggot. The other day when you called me a newfag, yeah, haven't forgotten about that yet. Fuck you I've been on here for months and probably get on here more than you anyways. Don't you know that you make yourself look like a newfag when you call others newfag? Just because you learned how to hack your name and change it to "Heaven" does not give you the right to disrespect anyone at any time.

>>551100000

Your mom!

>>551100136
Fex Mgaforf

my new pornstar name

I almost fell for that.
nice bait tho man

>>551100136
oops, meant to link to this comment here:
>>551100398

the thig i hate most about tumblr are those stupid attention cutters

Check my dubs :^)

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OMG GUYS
4CHAN IS SO TERRIBLE
They mke fun of us on there.
like how dare they generalize everyone on tumblr
all of the 4chan guys are fat greasy nolifes omg -_- im so done im gonna rape 4chan with porn and shit

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>>551100616

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>>551100616
You heard of the big fangirl trend, the #cutforbieber
shit?
they fucking dice their arms with razor blades so he'll quit doing drugs

>>551100879
WE started that faggot..

>>551100879
this>>551101087

GEt oUt xD

>>551101087
No shit? Ha, i'm stupid.

>>551101363
HOW DARE YOU RAPE ME WITH YOUR REPLY YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO REPLY TO ME CHECK YOUR REPLY PRIVILEGES YOU HAVE INVADED MY SPACE AND MY PRIVACY GET OUT MISOGYNIST RAPIST SCUM

HEY YOU. STOP SCROLLING IF YOU SEE THIS. I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW YOU'RE AWESOME AND IF ANYONE TELLS YOU DIFFERENT THEN THEY CAN GO FUCK THEMSELVES BECAUSE THEY ARE PROBABLY JEALOUS

>>551101537
I'm offended and essentially being oppressed by your reply to my deleted reply. it offends my very being as i am a comment trapped in a man's body

>>551100738
XDXDXDXD

>>551101573
Shut up thin privilege scum

>>551092735
How to Tumblr:
type the fIRST LETTER IN L O W ERCASE AND ADD SPACING AND INTENTOINAL TYOPS!

Let's see who can post the most tumblr of all real tumblr posts

>>551102260
i C A N T EVNE

>>551101087
seriously?Im literally surprised

>>551095270
0H MY GOD
DIF YOU JUST?
YOU DID
I CANT EVEN

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>>551100879
Look,a whore i follow proudly posted this

Hey everyone
I'm from tumblr
How is half of this mocking us...?
Most of it is just you talking normally.
b4 u ask, yeah i know how to sage. so what?

>>551103497
Probably not good if you can see the bone

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>>551101532
CHECK UR PRIVELEGE ABELIST SCUM.

Name an animated disney movie where the most main female character is single at the end of the movie

lilo & stitch doesn't count because lilo is too young

>>551103790
this is not even the worse thing she posted.Tumblr bitchs are insane

You disgusting pigs literally just don't get it #killallmen

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https://this.spooks.me/

>>551103968
Snow white...?
I dont watch much disney stuff man
Unless you count those dwaarfs as a 7-way, snow white i think

>>551104067
I am a pig trapped in a human's body and I find that deeply offensive. How DARE you compare me to men.

>>551104012
Can you post more?
I thought there was a big ass basilic?? vein or some shit there
The bleed out and die one hah

>>551104426
snow white ends up with that prince that kisses her in the end

>oh no snow white swallowed an apple
>luckily prince charming shows up at her funeral
>kisses her
>and the apple pops out
>and they got married and lived happily ever after

I find everyone of you cis fucklords oppressing.
I am a thread trapped in a human's body and you are all offending me

guyz can we just talk about how great How to train your dragon 2 was?

Any1 see the sonic screwdriver?

>>551098449
fucking for real?

>>551104947
It woulda been better if it has lesbians as the main characters ugh im so tired of white men having control over movies like its totally not realistic!

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>>551104947
I find this very offensive. I am a dragon trapped in a nord's body and this movie oppresses me

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>>551104670
Here,anon.

>>551105119
No because Sonic is one of my triggers

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Good times

>>551105278
Holy shit lol
That bitch is nuts
Never got the whole self mutilation thing

>>551104568
STFU youre triggering me you porcine shitlord. RAPE, RAAAAAAPE!

>>551094443
TRIPS

>>551093315
>>551093829
>>551093875
>>551094441
>>551094763
I have lost the ability to can

>>551105278
she's a very introverted bleeder, if this is real

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>>551105630
this makes two of us
>>551105907
>if this is real
Dude...Go on tumblr and search self harm,those tumblr bitches are insane.

Its funny that i generally never see this side of tumblr. Then again i just stick to fandom stuff mainly creepypasta doctor who and hetalia.

>>551105907
she thinks its fun,i wanna slap that fucking whore

>>551106474
If i ever go on there, its for the awesome high quality porn.
Nothing else.
I went on and looked at some of the regular shit that ends up there, and i was appalled.

>>551106645
and oc gore,if you are into it>>551105278

>>551106645
Who else finds the tumblr porn rather good?

>>551092735
Repeat after me:
being fat does not mean unhealthy
being fat does not mean unhealthy
BEING FAT DOES NOT MEAN UNHEALTHY YOU SHITLORDS WORSHIP MY CURVES

>>551106990
Zomg bow down to the horizontally challenged queen of tumblr we must abolish the thin privilege

>>551096424
i literally can/t \\\even@2!

>>551107272
I CANT EVEN
I CANT

A white heteronormative cisgendered CEO professor and Baptist preacher was teaching a class on Karl Rove, known Christian.
“Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Jesus Christ and accept that you too can become straight through daily prayer, self-flagellation, and eating Chik-Fil-A every day!”

At this moment, a brave, trans-Asian, self-diagnosed pansexual demiromantic vegan multisouled person who had been free of all animal products and only bought products at the local transgender co-op boldly stood up, holding a glass filled with some white liquid.

“Hey, Professor, what is this?”

The arrogant professor smirked like a rapist and smugly replied “It’s clearly milk, you crazy faggot. What the fuck does milk have to do with political science?”

“Wrong. It’s an all natural vegan soy almond kombucha latte. No animals or transpeople were harmed or raped in the making of this product.”

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of the Wall Street Journal. He stormed out of the room, clearly planning some kind of rape. The professor realized that he had been playing into the hands of the kyriarchy of CEOs, investment bankers, the Religious Right, and psychiatrists. He then killed himself. The proper term for this is “trans-dead”.

The students checked their privilege, all diagnosed themselves with autism and gender identity disorder and joined the Gay-Straight Alliance. An obese trans-eagle furry otherkin waddled into the room and tried to perch upon the American Flag, bending the flagpole in the process. All parties involved gave up meat, Christianity, and the right to bear arms.

>>551108015

Source: http://gallantlittlebelgium dot tumblr dot com
/post/32777189350/a-white-heteronormative-cisgendered-ceo-professor-and

>>551101087
hell yeah we did

>>551108015
9/10 i kek'd harder than i should have since it's copypasta and all

>>551108419

I normally don't post copypasta, but this one is fucking awesome and I never see it anywhere

>>551108568
Someone did a fat people army version of the US navy seal copypasta
Funniest shit i'd read in my life i tell you h'wut

>>551108015
[?] Privilege

>>551092735
<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/7Pp4nkyI0Bg" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

>>551108015
and that obese trans-eagle furry otherkin's name? albert einstein

>>551108713
Lol, her hair is teal.

>>551108713
Being a man who really does have aspergers syndrome i hate seeing people try to use it as an excuse to get people to worship them

>>551109135
That beverage’s name? Harvey “The One Percent” Milk.

>>551108015

But if they give up their right to bear arms, what will the bear-kin wear?

>>551109518
I kek'd

>>551108713
>triggered by teal
>can never post on slashdot

Sounds good to me

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>>551109518

Chainsaws

>>551108818
Does anybody have the pasta? I want to see it now. Also all I go on tumblr for is to mock people for trying to make facts when they have little comprehension of science. I'll try to tumblr [ehem]: rAP E !

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>>551109893

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Eminem and all other white rappers need to be KILLED. They are CISHET SCUM TRASH who only EXPLOIT the black community bY CULTURAL APPORIATING BLACK MUSIC and bLACK STEREOTYPES OMG IUM j sUST SO UoSET thEY KEeP EXPlOIOTING pEOPLE of COLOUR (I TYPE IT WITH A U BECAUSE I WISH I WAS BRITISH. LOL. DOCTOR WHO A+) AND THEY mnEED TO STOP BErATING ANd ABUSING LGBTQINSERTOTHERLETTERSHERE oMGG.
REBLOG AND SIGNAl BOOsT THis POST.
OH AND TRIGGER WARNING IF YOU LISTEn to EMINEM or other RAP musiC it REFERENCES RAPE AND inCEST AND I DON T WANT my POor FOLLOWERS EMOTIONalLY or MENTALLY HURT.
WHereS THE NEW HOMESTUCK???

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Related to this thread: I don't know what these are called, but I love these.

R-A-P-E!
Get that thing away from me
I'll stick my fist inside your ass
and cast away all of your class

>>551108713
Fat chicks who bitch about "thin privilege" are hilarious. This isn't fake

"Thin privilege is not having to spend extra money on buying a bathtub you’ll fit in.

One of my only joys in life is a relaxing bubble bath where I can submerge my whole body and just soak for an hour or so. My husband and I are remodeling our vacation home’s master bathroom, which includes a new tub. However, I am horrified to find that extra large tubs, the only kind that are large enough to submerge my whole body under, cost thousands more than regular sized tubs. Thin people will never understand the pain of going over-budget to indulge in the few things that make you happy at the cost of your dignity."

>>551092735
i am literally unable to
i cant
not even
no evens here
cant even

>>551112393
Oh noes i hope that wasnt any of your trigger words
Sorry #notsorry

>>551105272
fukkn lold

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z2_8cfVpXbo