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Post No. 16864149
I basically just want to know where to start to get my life together.
>clinically depressed for years, seen counselors a few times, didn't help much
>second semester university, 3 courses
>work 1 day a week, enjoy my job, basically minimum wage, no upwards mobility
>not fat, out of shape though
>chronic procrastinator. only ever get things done very last minute, but I always do get them done
>due to previous, I stay up very late and often only get a little amount of sleep
>have many pets that require my care. One of my few joys
>eat pretty okay
>loved by family and friends
I want to procrastinate less, sleep earlier and more, and start exercising, and I feel these will help with my depression and allow me to be more productive so I can do better in school etc. When I get home from the day, I plop down and I feel so tired I have to work myself up to get up to do the tiniest things like go to the bathroom. By the time it hits about 12 I start getting more energy and get a few things done, but they're limited. I'm not sure where to start because all of these issues are tangled up. I can't do things earlier or exercise because I'm so tired, because I do things late I go to bed late and get less sleep, because I don't get as much done as I like I feel more depressed, and the depression saps the remaining motivation I have. I'm tired of doing the bare minimum. I'm too tired to do most of the hobbies I enjoy. I want to develop good habits but I don't know how to pull myself together. School makes me feel suicidal almost every day. Being sad makes me feel guilty because my life is pretty good. I feel like I poison all relationships with my negativity. I try to keep it light, but it eats me up inside. I feel pushed to my limit even though I don't do much to the point where the thought of having to fit a dentist appointment in almost makes me panic.
I "function" but only barely. Where do I start building good habits? Will any of this even help me?