> Be nice to a guy > Not remotely interested in him whatsoever

No, I don't think you should be mean because someone fail to pick up on obvious social cues. Some people are simply thick, it isn't your fault.

I blame the media.

Anyway, you sent him the wrong message and he took it the wrong way. Both of these things would have had to have happened to have the situation you have now, and escape is not exactly far away from you, got it? Maybe this poor motherfucker is in some incredible pain or whatever, but it meant something to him that you were nice to him. Appreciate what you can. Is he still approaching you at all? Sending you text messages, following you around, anything like that, anything that escapes chance?

There are always people who are stupid. What do you want us to say? Just shrug your shoulders and move on. Tell him to piss off if you have to.

i feel you op, this happens with almost every guy i make friends with

>>16821989
>> "BUT YOU WERE NICE TO ME SO THAT MEANS YOU LIKE ME"

Guy's a fucking idiot.
Tell him so. Not for asking you out but for sayin' that shit though. He took a chance, got a "no", shoulda just walked it off.

Shit though OP... women thrive in ambiguity... one woman's "just being friendly, OMG WHY U ASK ME OUT CREEP" is another woman's "OMG I made it SO OBVIOUS. Why didn't you MAN-UP and ask me out like a real man would". To you it might seem like you made your intentions clear, but men get mindfucked left and right with this shit it's impossible to tell.

The sooner he realises it's never acceptable to approach or ask out any woman ever, shit the sooner EVERY MAN EVER learns that shit, the better.

Women would either end up alone, end up risking rejection and seein' things through our perspective, or they'd at least appreciate that someone had the balls to at least try rather than bitch-out.

>>16822049
Chances are what's in quotes is not what man said. dollar and a beer OP is from CA

Don't use hints, you pussy

>>16822064

That's a good point actually. I've never known a guy to say anything like that.

It'd only really be plausible if he has a mental illness or something, and if that's the case, OP's just downright cruel and heartless.
Aint sayin' she has to go out with him, but goddamn, wanting to bitch-out at a retard? Damn that's cold.

>>16822064
>tfw say this all the time
>tfw from CA

HOW DO YOU KNOW

I agree with >>16822049
>Not for asking you out but for sayin' that shit

I kinda know how the guy feels
I used to have a crush on my friend because they were the only talking to me on a regular basis
told myself It's the attention and nothing more

>>16822086
>TFW from cali
>TFW would never say this

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>>16822096
>cali

White girl pls go

LIKE TOTES HELLA WRONG THO HAHA :)))

>>16822107
>Not calling cali cali
this nigga
You must be from SF if you're that gay :^)

BTW is op still here?

>>16822122
OP is MIA she's seen that we're bigger jerkoffs than the guy who feel for her.

>>16822119
>saying cali and not where you're from

you must not be from LA gringa ;)

Norcal represent. Socal fags take your fucking "the 5" shit get out. Also, you hella need to stop jacking our water, douchebags.

>>16822134
>living in LA
>being this mexican
kek
>battlestar pegasus
more like
>battlecunt pegmydick

>>16822139
Where in NorCal are you? I aint even see no "the 5" the fuck?
>using hella that way

>>16822149
Its I-5 here in norcal not "the 5" like socal fags say it. Also, if you think I'm using that word wrong you're hella gay, kid.

>>16822145
I'm not living there anymore but I'm from there

>tfw halfbreed

T-Taquitos are good and mexican girls are always nice to me

Maybe I should stop trying to deport them

>>16822163
>Shit no lie I LOVE tortillas jsut them for EVERYTHING
put some in the toaster with cream cheese and suger

>>16822152
I might be hella gay but I aint that gay nigga

>>16822216
>tfw i keep buying tortillas but not using them
>tfw your cute cousin will never make you quesadillas for you again

ay dios mio

>>16822227
>mfw to beta to make your cousin food
>mfw to beta to feed it to her
:^,) thanks for the kekles

>>16822250
She's like 25 now and I'm sure married

not to mention on the other side of the country

mr kekkele man has been kekked

>>16821989

Was his asking you out really such a traumatic experience that you're going to be mean to every guy who you don't want to ask you out? That's just silly.

>>16821989

Never give hints when it comes to trying to lead someone towards one decision or another. Tell them. Be frank, honest, and gentle. "I like you a lot, we should go out sometime." "I like you as a friend, and that's all - I'm flattered that you want more, but I don't, and I'm sorry."

>>16821989

Happens all the time.

Can't blame the guy for trying his luck, but he shouldn't have flipped.

>Be nice to girl
>Not even remotely interested in any way, not even if I were drunk and on ecstasy
>Be pretty blunt about being friends from the get go
>Hang out doing random friend stuff one day
>Starts telling everyone how our "first date" went
>Tell her I'm not interested
>"WHY WOULD YOU LEAD ME ON LIKE THAT YOU ARE SO NICE"

crazy being on the other side for once. I was just trying to be friends with more girls so I can get more comfortable around women in general.

>"BUT YOU WERE NICE TO ME SO THAT MEANS YOU LIKE ME"
is this even a quote or is it 100% made up?
nice try roastie

>>16823692
>is this even a quote or is it 100% made up?
Not OP nor female, but I'm assuming that's the gist of it, not a literal quote.

"Don't flirt with me, we're just friends"
"I'm not interested in a relationship with you, I want to only be friends"


Its not that hard to say and it clears it up pretty damn well.

>>16821989
>what if
Instead of becoming a bitch because you encountered someone who tunnelvisioned his way through social interaction
>you
Just tell him why he is blind and start hanging out with people with sensibility?

>>16823703
>Its not that hard to say

Actually this is actually very hard to say given that women are being killed in the streets for not giving away their phone numbers.

Being nice to people is the right thing to do. You declined him going out, if he freaks out it's not your fault. You can tell him you are not interested in dating in general or something if you want to be extra nice, even if you actually start dating someone else. People change their mood constantly anyway so he doesn't have to feel bad about it. If he still does, it's still not your fault. Being nice was a good thing because it makes you a good person.
People who are jerks to someone who's attracted to them suck. Like at least they should be glad someone is attracted to them AND shows it. They should respect that person more even if they will decline a relationship with them. Imo.

TL;DR: I think being nice to him and politely declining the date is/was the best way to go, so congrats.

>>16822256
Are you so lonely that you must turn every advice thread into a conversation about your shit ?

>>16821989
>various hints
What hints were you actually giving him?

I would guess your hints were more subtle than you think they were. Most likely this was a misunderstanding on both sides and his ego was just hurt from a rejection. Happens all the time.

Idk but that's why I'm not overly friendly to anyone, especially guys. I keep it straight forward and curt if I'm not interested in a relationship.

Since we are on the subject I was wondering:
Should a guy always stop trying if the girl gives him hints she's not interested?
I mean especially if it's a guy that just enjoys flirting and doesn't really take much effort from him to flirt. Regardless of how it may annoy the girl a bit, is it like a social norm where the guy is not allowed to flirt with a girl who isn't interested?
I mean as long as it's playful or not too beyond lighthearted flirting... or when does it become harrasment?

Only one solution. If you get the vibe he is into you and your not into him be fucking honest asap. Tell him your not interested. Don't waste any time, don't be afraid of hurting his fragile self esteem. end of story problem solved.

>>16824386
Unless it legit makes her uncomfortable, I don't see a problem with that.

If it's obvious she wants you to stop though, just knock it off.

>>16821989
> "BUT YOU WERE NICE TO ME SO THAT MEANS YOU LIKE ME"

You were dealing with a betafag. It's just like creepy girls that will relentlessly try and get with guys. For his own good you should really just tell him the error of his ways, be straight up with him. But at the same time I don't know how you are irl, so you could have been mildly flirty with him. But he was an idiot for not taking a hint when you called him your "friend". And he's a pussy for getting mad at you declining his proposal.

Next time, don't be so open/warm with some guys, make sure they aren't going to blow it out of proportion. You were dealing with a class A betafag.

>>16821989
Well he still had to try.

>>16824404
This... A lot of guys are overly sensitive and will misunderstand the smallest gesture from a female. Its kind of sad but its the truth.

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>>16824411
I agree. Many people bash others for not even trying to ask the girl out. But then if they do ask her out they get called a beta fag and a creep.

>>16824421
He was a beta fag because he responded like that. If he had just said "oh okay then" walked off and cut contact he wouldn't have been a creep or a beta fag.

>>16824433
Oh... good point, sorry. I misunderstood it.

>>16824433
It's very possible that is actually what happened. I doubt the dude just yelled, "but you were nice to me!" Op might just be mad that op wanted nothing to do with her afterwards.

Then again if everything did actually play out the way op describes it, then yeah, he was cringeworthy.

>>16824446

Haha, yeah I don't at all put it past some guys for this not to be true. I always crack up at hearing some of the cringe stories my girlfriend has

>First date with some random guy she met at work
>Goes to get dinner and drinks
>check comes and she tries to pay
>He refuses and pays
>They walk back to the car and he tries to swoop in and kiss her
>She pushes him off and says, "No!"
>"What the fuck bitch! I bought you dinner. You owe me."

>Friday night after work, I'm meeting my girlfriend at a bar. I'm late because of traffic.
>She starts watching a hockey game going on, and some other guy notices her cheering along and starts making idle conversation
>She's watching the game but talks back
>He asks her if she wants a drink, and she politely declines saying thanks but no thanks, She's waiting for someone.
>He buys it anyway and puts it in front of her without a word. My girlfriend being my girlfriend, thinks it would be rude to decline at that point and just says, "Fine, but I've got your next round" (I can even picture the half exasperated sigh as she said it lol)
> I walk in and greet her with a kiss.
> As I do a notice some dudes face scrunch up like crazy, like he's massively butthurt. He vanishes before my girlfriend can turn around to introduce us.

>At a bar with a friend.
> She's gay.
> Sometimes I just end up pretending I'm her boyfriend because 70% of the time when she says she's gay, the response is the guy gets MORE aggressive and even becomes even harder to get rid of, like her being gay is a challenge to turn her straight or something.

>>16824501
Dude. Where do you live that the men are this terrible

>>16824501
>Ugh, why do men have to hit on me so much?
>Wow where are the real men? It's not hard to talk to me, guys. Have some balls xD!

Why are women so fucking insufferable? If their bodies didn't feel so damned good I'd be rid of them in a heartbeat

>>16824696
You just answered your own question

Its because you thirsty faggots enable this type of behaviour

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>>16824337
>women are being killed in the streets for not giving away their phone numbers

Yeah, no.

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>>16824501
>He buys it anyway and puts it in front of her without a word. My girlfriend being my girlfriend, thinks it would be rude to decline at that point and just says, "Fine, but I've got your next round" (I can even picture the half exasperated sigh as she said it lol)
> I walk in and greet her with a kiss.
> As I do a notice some dudes face scrunch up like crazy, like he's massively butthurt. He vanishes before my girlfriend can turn around to introduce us.

Beautiful anon. That fucking faggot got what he deserved. Men who think that acting that way is socially acceptable let alone attractive to the opposite sex need to be fucking punished. 10/10

>>16824687
Southern California

>>16824696
You say that like there aren't equally cringe inducing girls out there.

>Just got my heartbroken by the girl that I thought was the one I was waiting for (former abstinence kid)
>I feel crushed, but that leads me to decide to see what's out there
>Go on my first date ever
>We meet up at a bar. She's totally in to me (sends a text to her friend saying how cute/charming I am, except it goes to me. pretend I never read it.)
> On our way back, she starts trying to make out. At this point I've only ever kissed the girl who broke my heart, and just decide fuck it and go with the flow.
>We get inside and I can see where this is going,"Hey, listen. Tbh, I'm a virgin and I'm brand new to dating. Truth is, I don't want to mislead you. I'm still hurting from a previous relationship and looking for anything serious, or even past tonight. "
>She says she's cool and wants the same.
>We sleep together.
>fast forward a week, cue the late night texts and drunken, sobbing voicemails.

The guilt is real. Welcome to the world of dating.

>Messing around on OKC. Message a girl. We chat for an hour. Tell her I have to start my day because I've got things to do later, but I"ll be at X cafe for lunch if she wants to join.
>I'm waiting for friends to get in town. Ends up they don't get in 'til super late. I spend about 8 hours with her doing absolutely everything and nothing, having what's probably one of the best dates of my life.
>At the end she asks if we can meet again, I agree
>Next morning I text her that I had a great time yesterday and if she's free next week.
>"I'm sorry, I don't know. I'd fall in love with you too easily so I can't date you because I couldn't marry you because you're not X religion."

>Meet a girl for a coffee date. She's late by 30 minutes, but I'm making friends with the barista so whatever. 15 minutes in to the date, she asks what my ethnicity and star sign is, and then tells me she's never been with either of those.

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>>16825096
>I'm still hurting from a previous relationship and looking for anything serious

Then why did you go out on a date with someone if you didn't want to get into a relationship? Honest question.

>>16825120

Thee purposes:
1.) Because before I met the girl who broke my heart, I was starting to think I'd never meet anyone who I felt strongly enough about to care about. Meeting her was a wake up call. It proved to me that I COULD fall in love, and that there WERE people out there for me. I had met one, maybe I'd get lucky with another, but only if I took action , threw myself in the world of dating, and actively looked for once.

2.) To see what dating was actually like (I was curious).

3.) And because I knew if I just sat there wallowing in self-pity, just waiting 'til I got over it, I'd never get over her, and I'd never make any progress. It took about three years, but I eventually did, bit by bit. I thought I was over her a while ago, but it wasn't until I met my current girlfriend that I realized I wasn't, that for once, I was looking forward in to the future with my gf, rather than comparing back to the past, and that I was truly and completely over her in every way.

>>16821989
>Someone made a simple mistake that harmed no one; is that sufficient cause for me to be a bad person?
No.
/next question

>>16821989

It's because you never said you had a boyfriend.

Boys are stupid so you need to be blunt and concrete with them.

>>16824724

People are killed over for less so it's not too surprisingly.

Though it's not common occurrence like anon may have implied.

>>16821989
No don't be a bitch, that guy was just incredibly dense. Yes, you'll probably meet a few guys who act like that, but most guys can take the hint

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No such thing as friendship between the opposite sex.

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calm down. this happens but from how you've described it he's bad at picking up social cues. just reinforce your answers. if he continues even after you've spelled it out in lights, THEN there would be an issue.

>>16824724
You'd actually be surprised at how often it happens. Some people can be fucking nuts m8

"BUT YOU WERE NICE TO ME SO THAT MEANS YOU LIKE ME"
No, he doesn't understand platonic interest from romantic interest.
Give him a Wikipedia page on platonic interest because he's retarded.

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>>16825096
>southern california
>short vacation with boyfriend in LA
>hotel is near a CVS so i walk out to go grab some things for our room
>wearing pants and one of his hoodies, no make up because i don't really care
>on my way back, some guy stops me in front of the crosswalk
>try and go past him and he follows and keeps blocking
>genuinely confused at this point
>"hey mama, how about i buy you a drink"
>say thank you but mention that i'm heading back to meet up with my boyfriend
>calls me a bitch and walks off

>>16821989
just don't be nice to losers who only want to get their dicks wet

>>16821989
Call him out on his shit. He was nice to YOU because he had an ulterior motive.