My girlfriend decided she wanted to go to the club last night. I didn't feel comfortable with her going without me and I expressed it to with her without any arguing, but she went anyways and hasn't said anything to me since she left. I didn't want to go because I was exhausted and I have to get up early in the morning. Am I allowed to be upset that she went?
Not really unless she has a history of doing bad things in clubs.
She's an adult allowed to go and have fun whereever and with whoever she wants. unless you have a good reason to be so restrictive (aka - unless she has cheated in the past with a club guy) you're in the wrong. And even jf she has, it's a grey area
Then fuck you. She has the right to go out and have fun without you moping around because you don't like to. If you trusted her you would be such a bitch. You probably met her at a club, and a dozen the same way, so you know what could happen.
You should try learning to read you autistic fuck. I didn't force her to do anything, just told her it made me uncomfortable but I didn't make her stay.
Expressing how you feel is what you do in a relationship cuck.
>calls someone a cuck.
>probably getting cucked as we speak.
Is she permitted to have any life that isn't devoted entirely to you? Is she permitted to enjoy herself when you're not there?
Either you trust her or you don't. If you do, relax in the assurance that she's not going to cheat. If you don't, dress her in a burka and chain her to the radiator.
What are you, her fucking keeper?
She's a grown ass woman who's allowed to make her own decisions and who's allowed to do what she wants, where she wants, and with whom she wants.
Unless she's given you reason to be suspicious, back the fuck off and stop being so controlling and possessive.
If you're that worried, then send her a text or something. Just ask how her night's going, tell her you hope she's having fun and you love her, then leave it.
Why exactly did you want to restrict her freedom? Relationships are based on trust, if you don't trust her then date someone you trust instead.
Wouldn't you feel guilty if she had gone home and slept early just because you said so? When you knew she wanted staying out longer? Your her boyfriend, not bed time manager.
Has she given you a reason not to trust her?
You made the mistake of investing yourself too much in your woman.
Women have the choice to cheat on their partners, this isn't Saudi Arabia.
If you can't trust her to be faithful, then it's not love. Love always trusts, always.
What your problem is, is that you feel like your girlfriend is your possession. She's "yours" and you want to keep her locked in a little cage where she can't escape and hook up with another guy.
That will lead you to a life of heartbreak.
If it's not meant to be, you'll find out one way or the other. You have to focus on yourself and your goals, and not depend on any woman for happiness.
so many butthurt women in this thread lol
she wanted to go to the club, you expressed your concern and she went there anyways without saying anything
she is a party girl or is on the way to become one
girls go to those places because they like the attention from the guys
you are being a cuck
Sorry to burst your strong independent wymyn who don't need no man fiction but if you behave in ways that we consider promiscuous and suspicious, we aren't going to bother. Clubs are for whores and op doesn't want to date a whore.
She was free to go and you were free to express your concerns. Her going tells you she prioritized her going and dancing with other guys over your own concerns. Even if your concerns are invalid or unfounded, a partner that respects you will empathize and understand when their actions belittle their SO. Now you know your gf doesn't find you a priority. Why should you find her one?
Don't call her. Let her make first contact. Make some plans with your friends for today. See how she reacts when she's bumped down on your priority list. If she reacts in anger or in a negative way,she is a hypocrite and this is not a girl you want to be with. Alternatively, if she shows no concern about what you're doing at all, you are not a concern at all to her and she doesn't care about you. Both extremes of reactions would be grounds for a discussion on the relationship. Should that be refused, break up with her. You don't need apathy from a partner.
>See how she reacts when she's bumped down on your priority list. If she reacts in anger or in a negative way,she is a hypocrite and this is not a girl you want to be with. Alternatively, if she shows no concern about what you're doing at all, you are not a concern at all to her and she doesn't care about you.
dude you're setting OP up for a lose-lose situation. Either of those reactions are explicable with normal responses; she could be mad that he's being petty and getting his manipulative 'revenge', or she could be understanding and stay cool giving him space after the conflict.
You're bad at wimmin.
Well my gf knows I don't like going to clubs but I told her she can still go. She doesn't anymore though, she said it would be disrespectful to me since everyone knows why girls go to clubs. OPs girl just needs a lot more attention to get by I guess.
She's your gf, not your daughter. If you don't want her to go to clubs you better be ready with an alternative that makes her happy beyond your cock. This could mean anything from an evening of Shakespeare to cooking for her parents. Despite the chorus of fuckboys and permavirgins here, chances are 50/50 thay she's going there for intimate relations. She could need a night away from your needy ass to get drunk with her girlfriends.
You should have outlined early on in the relationship that you don't want to be exclusive to each other if she wants to go to clubs, where she would be attracting other men.
Clubs are breeding grounds, not play pens.
If my gf went to a club I would just say "alright, have fun. When can I get my things?"
I've been dating my gf for four years. She never has once went to a club, because she has no reason to. We're in an exclusive relationship, what goal does going to a club accomplish?
That's like saying "do you mind if I start a Tinder account? I'm not going to hookup with anybody I just want to have fun."
Of course you're allowed to feel whatever you want. It's not all that reasonable though especially since you weren't ready to go with her.
The real question is if this is a part of a bigger pattern: Does she have a tendency to ignore your concerns (and do you have a tendency to be worried)? You might not be a good fit.
Bro there's ALWAYS an excuse.
>Love always trusts, always.
This is the dumbest shit on the face of the earth. Confusing love and trust will net you a shit ton of trouble in life.
What's the worst is the girls that are desperate to spend time with their friends, and will do anything with them.
"My girls are going to a party in the ghetto next to that house where that girl was gangraped. Mind if I go? I haven't seen my girls in three days. I just wanna spend time with them"
I don't know about you guys, but I have been dating the same guy for quite a few years and we both go to clubs occasionally with or without each other. We have no qualms and totally trust each other, because when we go it is purely just drinking and getting wild with friends. I go because I genuinely like dancing, and my friends usually get me to play wingwoman. Once they start talking to guys, I get myself a drink and go out on the club's balcony, smoke and text my boyfriend what I'm doing so he knows I'm not flirting around. I wait for my friends to stop flirting and any guys who approach me I have a casual and short conversation with then I make an excuse like I need to go to the toilet and leave. And as far as I know my boyfriend does about the same, he plays wingman for his friends and just drinks on the side. If you have restraint over yourself it's pretty easy to avoid cheating occurring imo.
You don't need permission to have feelings. If this doesn't sit well with you then do something about it. You did well in expressing yourself. She thought about and then made her choice. Now you make yours.
Lmao,the dumb whores in this thread.
When in a committed relationship, the both of you have an obligation to eachother and going to places Like clubs where single thirsty guys go to hit on girls is forbidden.
She doesnt respect you at all. Just go fuck another girl, dont even bother replyinh or texting the whore. Show her that If she wants to fuck around, you can do the same.
Do not Listen to the worthless whores in this thread trying to shame you for "restricting" your ex from whore behqvior.
Fuck what that guy said.
You have every right to be upset. Listen to yourself, man. Please, for your own sake, stop buying this shit and listen to yourself. Make your own decisions. I would be upset with you for exactly the reasons you expressed here.
>Reading this thread
>Just acquired bf in foreign country where people often drink
>He goes to clubs often with friends/goes out drinking to celebrate (I don't go because I don't drink nor can I speak his friend's language)
>I never really monitor when/where he goes because I respect his privacy and freedom
>Bf texts me cute things like "miss you" randomly while at the clubs
If I listened to all the anons in this thread, I'd be convinced my bf was cheating in clubs, ...but realistically I highly doubt he'd have any reason for cheating since we have great times together and I trust him wholly.
OP, If she's gonna cheat, she will find a way. Don't listen to those here saying that the LOCATION is important. What's important is that she did something that made you upset without caring about your feelings as well as not maintaining contact. I don't ever text my bf while he's out with friends because I'm really relaxed but he instead randomly sends cute shit throughout the night that lets me know he's thinking of me and having a good time.
If you don't have trust and solid communication, your relationship is already over.