I've recently moved in with my girlfriend and to put it bluntly, she'd like to have a lot more sex than we're currently having, and I would too (though not as much as she wants). Ideally I'd like to have it every other day or maybe once a day, she wants it around four times a day. When I've posted this before I get responses like "no porn/masturbation" but in all seriousness I don't really do that because I don't have enough time in my busy schedule. Last night we had a talk about it and it turns out this is really hurting her self esteem because I only have the energy for sex every 3-4 days and I can't even stay hard the whole time.
My diet is okay, not great but not junk food, and I don't really do a lot of intense aerobic exercise but I have a job where I'm on my feet walking around all day. I have a gym membership but I never go because by the time I get off work I'm so exhausted I'm essentially passing out. My girlfriend can essentially just lie in bed and eat regular foods (i.e. not health foods and zinc supplements, which are pretty much a requirement for me if I want to be turned on that day) and still be turned on and ready to go, so she doesn't get why it's so difficult for me.
I know the ED is probably psychological because I always expect it to happen so it always happens. Thing is though, I used to be really turned on all the time, and I have no idea what happened. My girlfriend is sexy as hell so I know that can't be the problem. Sometimes she asks me if I'm secretly gay or asexual, and I don't think I'm gay but I feel like I should just be able to get turned on when I cuddle my girlfriend or see her naked, and as is that's just not the case.
What can I do?
Drink a small amount of beer or wine before sex.
Use lots of lube.
Take ginkgo supplements.
Do kegel exercises daily. At least two sets of fifteen reps.
More foreplay. Massage, kissing, etc.
Eat lots of chicken. Not red meat.
Take B vitamins, or brewer's yeast.
I used to have sex with my gf four times a day and came every time. It drained me to the point where I couldn't stay hard. Take breaks of cumming. If you don't have energy to fuck, just eat her out or rub her pussy with lots of lube. Google the video of Nina Hartley and Sunny Lane teach you how to eat pussy properly
I don't. I'm pretty sure I said that in my OP. No time.
If I jerk my dick a lot, sure. If I just watch it I won't get hard at all.
Yeah I mean I always make sure she can cum whether it's through fingering or eating out, but the issue is that she doesn't think I'm attracted to her.
Ah, so communicate dude!
Girls are very mental beings. During sex and foreplay you have to say stuff like
>you're so sexy
>I love your body
>I love you
>that feels so good
>your skin is so soft
>I love this ass
Etc. use a soft whisper, speak slowly like you caress your woman slowly. Whisper into her ear.
>I have a job where I'm on my feet walking around all day
You get plenty enough of exercise then. No idea about the testosterone, but aerobic, you're fine. See if you can do some pushups every morning, slowly build up to 100.
Another thing you may want to consider, is your job stressful? A lot of constant stress is a known factor for ED, and lowered libido. If you have a stronger desire to go down on her on sundays, give it some serious though. Sadly, work-related stress is common these days, and the only "cure" would be to change jobs.
How old are you anon, and how long ago did you notice the drop in libido?
You aren't sexually compatible. You can't fix this. Unless you're a cuck end it now before she starts bringing functional cock home with her and making good use of it in front of you.