I am not a vengeful person, never been. However, someone i've lived my whole life with (not romanticly) fucked me over big time. I lost three figures money because of this person, lost friends, opportunities, bonds. I've also been humliated, all because i believed this person once, and wasted one and a half whole year because of it. Today i gave up on an opportunity to fuck this person over, like many times before, because i'm not sadistic, because i've never felt like having revenge in long term. I even thought, weeks before when i had similar oportunities, about fucking this person over for once. But i didn't. I jst didn't feel like doing it. Not out of pity, but because i purely didn't feel like getting revenge. Some, like my lawyer, call it ''Maturity'' and ''Getting over''.
However, as mentioned, today i passed on an opportunity to get a small bit of revenge compared to everything this person has ever done to me. I didn't, and that person knew about that, some people congratulated me, including my lawyer, and even he said the person felt gratitude and all. Then i got home, literally the same 30 minutes i had arrived, i received a phone call from someone i know about this person spreading lies about me, ridiculous, humiliating lies. We live in a small city, so it's a sure shot that this will be spread. And i'm feeling like having this feeling of revenge again, this burning feeling that i think might be hatred by i think it isn't since it won't last 2 days. I'm not able to hate anyone big time, even though i get disgusted by a few people, like this one and others. But maybe this time you folks, if you see fit, may talk me out of forgetting this, and going through doing something to fuck this person over, just out of justice. Just to punish every major thing such childish, coward person has ever done. I don't know what to do, i don't even know if being non-vengeful can be considered a weakness, which it seems it's being.
three figures is a lot. this person intentionally fucked you over? or did you make a bad investment in something they honestly (Though retardedly) thought might work? if the former, its not revenge you're dolling out. its justice. if the latter, than you made a bad choice and becuase it went down wrong their being a dick. just vengance.
imo you don't sound weak. you sound like someone who is comfortable with who they are. you're having second thoughts about that comfort itself. but if you still have the money to support yourself well and CANT get the money back from this guy, its your call, its your life.
its too late with the rumors and no one important will entertain them for very long
I have money. It's more of the latter, they fucked me financially out of retardness and childishness. The rest, the humiliations and moral attacks were fully intentional. I'm just mad, but not so much, since i don't really feel strong emotions for long. But i don't know what to do, can't shake off this feeling i'm being a weak person for not punishing them. Not even the rumors itself i'm worried, it's their fucking behavior. Why the fuck do it? I've never done anything to hurt them, quite the contrary, i could, literally and figuratively, hurt them through a lot of means, yet not only i didn't, i've also helped them.
you have lots of money, so get some instant revenge. pay some assholes to go beat him up. if ur not into it, dont.
but dont think your weak for having self control. an eye for an eye for an eye for an eye. whole world goes blind. just learn from the lesson and protect yourself in the future.
i wish there was more i could say to help OP. me personally, i love a little vengance and if i can fuck someone over who is being an asshole, i will without hesitation. i think its good to stand your ground and kick ass and not let people walk all over you.
but i dont see you as weak for being the opposite. i see you as comfortable. and if you can button down the hatches and still take care of yourself very well in this world, you dont have much to worry about.
Resisting the urge to fuck someone over is strength, not weakness. *However,* if it is possible that fucking someone over may produce beneficial results for yourself or other "good" people (including pushing the "bad" person to change their ways), then it may be the right thing to do. Otherwise if fucking someone over will just harm them without possibly helping others, then don't do it.