So I'm 21. Average guy in every way. Except I don't really like seeing women in distress. I don't like to see them fight, cry or whatever. I guess my mother had something to with that. I don't really care about other guys because we aren't really supposed to be emotional or all that. But whenever I discuss this stuff online I get called a white knight or with my friends I get called a marshmallow. Some women even get offended at my viewpoint. I just think women are...god, forgive me for this. I know how this'll come out, sort of delicate and need to be protected, you know? What's wrong with that?
Women don't really care whether your nice or not as long as you are confident. Hanging out with more guy friends, being nice to everyone not just women, and not treating them like some sort of delicate flower goes a long way to show you are confident.
No chivalry isnt dead but what you describe isnt chivalry, it's called obsessive clingy boyfriend behaviour which is unattractive. You don't own you girlfriend, it's a mutual thing. A beta orbiter is what you are, you hover around females that you cannot obtain, do things for them, gain nothing in return while her boyfriend treats her shit and plows her nice holes.
You lose in the end.
Whoa! You're projecting, dude.
I have a girlfriend. We've been together for 2 years now and I don't treat her as property. I don't even know what "beta orbiter" is. I'm not clingy or obsessive or whatever. Sensitive, maybe, in that I don't even like it when my girl gets upset, but what you said? Keep your insecurities to yourself.
my bf feeds intot he classic manly scheme too. he's big, broad, etc and he's into stuff like giving me his jacket or opening the car door. i don't need him to do this stuff but i surely like it. i'm very independent and not really thinskinned. i like the way he makes me feel like a kitty that needs protection
Okay I'm not sure how I came off in the OP post but I'm not a dick to other guys. I offer support as any good man would. I just never liked it when I saw a female in trouble. Not even saying I did something all the time---My girl believes it's why I'm a good father to our daughter, but I've been thinking.
Of course. I'm not ignorant to the fact that there are strong women, both physically and mentally, that don't really need a guy to fuss over them. It's just something that was instilled within me as a child. I'm never overbearing though.
Dear OP. There's a difference between chivalry and good manners. One gets you taken advantage of. The other knows when it's time to throw a bitch to the curve.
You would hold a door open for a woman who called you every name in the book. That makes you a white Knight and a pussy.
Close the door on that bitch and go about your business. Kindness and cordiality are for those that show they deserve it.
aslong as you are like that with your wife and your daughter, you're golden. just be aware that you could get yelled on if you try to help that fat chick with the pink hair carry her croceries to her car.
Hm. Seems to be the general consensus these days. You get looked at like a freak for being kind and courteous, but embraced for acting like an aloof bonehead. It's simply the way I was raised. I wouldn't change it.
That's not chivalry you faggot.
Chivalry is fighting and dying for those too weak to fight and uphold all that is good. To weed out corruption etc.
It's not what you think it is which is being a massive fedora wearing white knight faggot so that women can use you like the weak fuck you are.
Seriously go fuckyourself.
Don't ever use chivalry like that again you c.uckx
I don't know. I always thought it normal but given what my friends say/mock and how i'm responded to here...It makes me think maybe I should become that "aloof bonehead guy" that seems be lauded. I'll still be a marshmallow to my gf and little girl no matter what though =p
I used to feel like that too when I was young. Then I acknowledged these facts:
-Women are just human beings
-Some of them are cunts through and through
-Some of them fake needing assistance
-Quite a few of them like to prove they can fight for themselves, they can think for themselves and they find themselves merely offended by someone who thinks they're somehow disabled for just being women and need special care.
-Women are just human beings
-Most guys who act like this usually lack confidence
Well I'm not lacking for confidence. While I know/always knew women are just humans like the rest of us, it was just a thing that was instilled within at a young age. I guess I grew up fortunate in that I never really experienced the kind of women described your post. No woman never overacted to me holding the door open for her or asking or small talk.
Sorry if i hit a nerv there betabux buddy, the only projection im giving is of reality. You can date your girlfriend for aslong as you want but when she finally tells you about her cheating on you with a dominant man don't come crying about it here.
It doesn't really matter that it was instilled at a young age. My sister tried to push this idea into my head that I should take every single hit for a woman and from woman even, without complaining. I took the time to question this and analyze it, and come to the conclusion that she was completely full of shit and that such thing does not make a good person, just a biased one.
I guess it's hard for you to grasp that not everyone is such a dick like the parents who abused you and that fat kid that bullied you through out middle school. Sorry you had such a rough life, Anon.
Anon no need to get defensive and start throwing random insults based off nothing. If what i said really offends you then maybe you should look deeper because in the end i'm not going to be the one asking /adv/ crying about being dumped lol.
I guess it comes down to everyone being different. Some people believe chivalry is dead, some people don't and some balk at the term. I have a girl who loves me, an adorable baby girl and no enemies (that I know of). I've had and will continue to live a good, happy life.
Thanks to everyone who contributed to this discussion.
You are misconstruing the comparison between chivalry versus being well mannered. Your definition of chivalry would lead you to turn the other cheek countless numbers of times regardless of how you were treated. Good manners and a good sense of self what I'm talking about. It has nothing to do with being aloof. Be kind. Be courteous. Hold the door open for men and women and children and elderly people. Say thank you. Say please. Or as my grandmother used to say, just don't be a dick. Until, of course, it's time to be a dick.