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New in a relationship. She says "it's going too fast

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New in a relationship. She says "it's going too fast for me".

How should I behave or react?
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gotta go fast
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if you're a niceguy you lose. if you're an asshole you win
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Would you consider yourself more alpha or more beta?

If more alpha, she's worried about looking like a slut sleeping with you. She's looking for more than just sex from you, she wants a relationship too. There are a few ways you could handle this, depending on what you're looking for.

If you're a beta, she's probably saying that because you've been giving her the boyfriend experience for free/cheap and now you're trying to raise prices on her by looking for sex in return.
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I remember the day she was that shy she couldnt even touch my shoulder when she laughed about a joke i've made. Also we slept on our first date.

I guess the first one.
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>>16717581
this, send sanic picture
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>>16717581
I second this senpai
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>>16717560
You already blew it. Move along.
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Start acting distant. not autistic, just distant.

She will miss you, but you gotta be strong and not beta up
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absolutely. I am going act distant now. thanks for all your advice!
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>>16717560
Stop calling/texting her.
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>>16718775
no! ffs! what's this autistic advice here...

are you interested in a relationship with this girl?
what she most likely means is that the physical and emotional intimacy aren't on par. or that you want to put a label too soon.
make an effort to have some "slow" dates again. like just going for a walk. or cooking together. something that involves you doing stuff without it being sex or watching a movie (thus not being able to have more indepth conversations).
Share more about yourself and ask her questions that make her open up. this creates a stronger bond.
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>>16718790
don't listen to this shit.

Distant is good but it's vague advice.

You need to text her less.

Call her less.

Talk to her less.

But don't stop altogether.

You have your own life and she wants to see that it takes up your time, if it doesnt take any time then you don't have your own life and so she has nothing to gain from being with you.
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>>16718775

You should try actually communicating with your partner, you would be amazed how rarely you have to guess what they're feeling when you're in the habit of asking.
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>>16718817
that is exactly how he got in this mess. You're an idiot or you just didn't read his post at all.
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>>16718794
yeah, no.

i really liked my bf when we started dating, but we rushed in a bit and i wasn't feeling comfortable with the level of intimacy anymore. i just didn't know him good enough already. if he had pulled this "distance" shit on me i would have thought he lost interest and moved on. instead we did what i mapped out above and are now happy as can be. this "acting cold" is just playing immature games. it's PUA advice and will push every girl with the slightest selfworth and dignity far, far away. and y'know, those would be the girls you actually want in your life. not the ones that you can pull in again by acting distant. they only want what they can't have. how is this a good foundation for a relationship?
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>>16717560
Slow the fuck down and let her take the reigns for a bit, what do you think?
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>>16718831
This is a girl giving advice on girls. The best advice is not to listen when this happens.
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>>16718844
makes sense. since girls actually have insigt on girls emotions it would be TOTALLY stupid to listen to this advice. better listen to bitter virgins that never even had an emotional connection to a person of the other gender, not counting their moms.
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she has more prospects
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>>16717560
Stop being a clingy bitch
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>>16718794

yes. that's what I thought. I need to stop being a dude, who is easy to get.

Of course, I want to be in a relationship with her. And more important: win her heart.

man, being an asshole is the only game I didn't want to play. I've started being honest and now I fucked it up a little bit.
I also totally agree that being distant and someone you can't have is not a good foundation. But a good start
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>>16718853
you act like what I said was sexist or something.
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my "girlfriend" and my friends will come over and have dinner with me. Later we going to hit a bar or sth. and she is going to stay the night. (background: everytime when i met her we have sex, so that's not the point. And the first time we did, she told me that it is too early but it would feel right and she has feelings for me. but the struggle happened the day i opened this discussion. she told me that she really appreciates the kindness she never had before. but i had too much future talks, like having a home with her. For the beginning in a relationship it is not really good to talk like that. I just thought that she would like it, till yesterday).
Thread posts: 24
Thread images: 1


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