I know this is going to sound pretty sexist, but I want my fiancé to be a housewife. I absolutley love the tradition of a hard day at work and coming home to a home cooked meal made by my loving wife. This thought fills me with joy and happiness. Innocent joy and happiness at that too. Though this is my dream, my fiancé has hammered it into my head early on into our relationship that she has no intention of becoming a housewife. I get that pursuing one's career is important, but (hopefully) when we have children I feel that it will be kinda arbitrary for her, unless that is she continues on working as will I. I want to be the breadwinner and support my family by bringing the income but I want my wife to support the family by raising our children into fine adults.
Is it wrong to have these views in 2016?
What are your opinions on the matter femanons?
>my fiancé has hammered it into my head early on into our relationship that she has no intention of becoming a housewife
You fucked up in continuing the relationship then
>Is it wrong to have these views in 2016?
Not really. There are girls out there who want this, but I'd say they're in the minority. Most girls want at least a part time job
>What are your opinions on the matter femanons?
It's not for me.
You were born in the wrong decade, boy. Most girls that try to be a career 'housewife' end up as hooker sand strippers when they realize that the guys that make nice comfy incomes want to spend it on hookers and strippers instead of being monogamous. Pure economics has destroyed the nuclear family. Good going free market.
While that is the preferable way a marriage should work if you have children (1 parent stays home) your fiance let you know this was the way it would be. You are not going to change her mind.
Is it sexist when feminists demand a house husband? It's sexist only when you think that should be their only job. If you want a woman who wants to be a homemaker, then find one. If she's exercising her right to remain at home and look after family, I don't think anybody should have a problem with that.
Femanon here. I love cooking, it's a huge passion of mine. I would love to do that kind of stuff, make different meals for my fiance every night. The problem is, I have a lot of other hobbies too that I need money to pay for. I really like art and makeup, hair care, gaming, to name a few. I feel bad just taking his money. It makes me feel terrible, so I need a job to support my hobbies.
Why terrible? When two people are committed enough to share their lives, live together, bring lives into the world, money is the last thing they should claim individual proprietorship on.
Not to say that your way is the wrong way. It's certainly great, but you shouldn't do it just because you want to earn 'your' money. Extra money, yes. Mine or his/her money, no.
Even as a feminist, I don't find that sexist at all. I mean, if you were going around saying ALL women should be like that, it'd be annoying, but all you're saying here is that you personally want a housewife, and I find nothing wrong with that. At least you know what you want and are honest about it, y'know? And there's nothing criminal about wanting to be the provider of your family.
I guess the question isn't actually what we femanons think about this. The question is, how important is this ideal to YOU?
Would you be bitter if, ten or twenty years from now, your wife still won't give up her job? Or would you accept that being with her is more important than the fulfillment of this dream?
Think about it now while you're still not married yet. You still have time.
Semi housewife here. The biggest issue with not having a normal job is you are being judged everywhere. Inlaws especially. If anything else let her have something to keep assholes off her back. There is a really divide in society, that assumes if you don't work somewhere and don't have children you are not doing your fare share...this is simply false. I run my house and without kids as of now I pretty packed days.
The only one who understands and sees it is my husband (which should be all that matters. But still awkward in what do you do? conversations.)What your asking your fiance to be can critized very harshly, even with kids.
It's not sexist to have a preference, but this part
>but (hopefully) when we have children I feel that it will be kinda arbitrary for her,
That part is sexist. If you're going to marry her, and put babies in her and expect her to change her mind, you're gonna have a bad time.
Growing up I never thought I'd be the housewife type, but stuff happened, and now I find myself quite happily domesticated, but it was all my doing, not his.
In a marriage, this sounds very transactional. Once married, you cease to earn for yourself. It's for the family. Furthermore, in a sense, homemaking *is* serious labor. Something homemakers (mainly women) never get paid for.
Unless we are intent on morphing into purely economic beings, we have to rethink where we are heading.