Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
Avoid asking these common questions:
>Is it normal for me to go to a club/bar by myself?
Yes. Stop overthinking this.
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking
>Brandon or Female Brandon
>Who is Brandon/Female Brandon?
A shitposter who's convinced he's ugly. He keeps posting his picture to ask if he's ugly and to ask for dating advice, only to rebut or ignore any responses he gets. Female Brandon is a girl who pulls the same shit.
Also piss off.
Is my theme song going to get me laid?
Getting mixed signals from a girl.
>talking with girl I knew from HS on facebook
>graduated last year
>see her occasionally while I'm working
>Tell her I like her and ask her out
>"awww" not "I like you too"
>says she's busy but will be free some time next week
>suggest what we should do. she likes it
>ask what days she's free, needs to check her work schedule
>change the subject
>seen but no reply 3 hours ago
I'm probably overthinking this, but the possibility that she's just being too nice to properly reject me is making me anxious.
Reposting from last thread's last post
>girl friend continuously talks about her birthday for a month to remind me and her other friends
>the day comes and I wish her a happy birthday, spend some time with her talking about her plans though not much more since she was busy
>my birthday is a week after
>talk about it too a few times
>the day comes
>not a single word
>not a single moment of interest
>best birthday ever
I thought I was close with this girl, but she doesn't give a single shit. My other 'friends' too, but this girl in particular because we kept talking about our birthdays, especially on her own birthday. And then she just ignores me on mine.
It's probably small, but it's not the first time I'm let down like this and I'm hurt. Should I just cut her off? Is this alone good reason to cut someone off already? I don't know if I'm too forgiving already by letting my 'friends' get away with past shit.
Its a bit low energy for me
I will use this song and take her flower Inshallah
Ya blew it at "I like her and ask her out"
and at "suggest what we should do"
and at using facebook messenger when you see her in person
I could argue not making a move in high school or hurriedly changing the subject while the ball was in her court, but it doesn't change anything anyway. She shot you down pretty clearly and if she doesn't bring it up anymore I wouldn't bother
I didn't literally say those things to her, and I've only seen her twice since HS.
She also had a bf when school got out.
And it's not "pretty clearly." The protocol is usually for a girl to say she's busy but not name an alternative time.
>She has a boyfriend
>She comes back into my work occasionally, still flirts with me
>Sometimes in front of her boyfriend
>Always likes my posts on fb or instagram, watches my story
Am I being lead on, or does she actually like me?
Femanons, how would you react if another woman made a move on you.
Same question but you are drunk and horny.
>Femanons, how would you react if another woman made a move on you.
depends on the woman
last time a woman made a move on me she was piss drunk and I was waiting for her girlfriend to clean up that pile of garbage
if it was my type of woman, I might be into it. but i'm picky. otherwise I'd laugh it off
I feel really weird right now..
So I've been talking to a girl I like for the past few weeks. It's been nice. Well, I'm playing video games right now, and for some reason the reality just kicked in that I'm actually like emotionally involved with a girl. For whatever reason. I feel really odd all of a sudden. Like I've been in a trance or something. It doesn't make sense cause I like this girl. What is this?
Does a girl have to find you attractive to make out with you? I suffer from low self esteem but managed to hook up with a girl a few days ago at a club but am still unconvinced I'm even slightly appealing to females.
I'm joining the Army. My best friend's ex messaged me on Facebook asking me about how it's going because she has a friend that just took his ASVAB and she was curious of the process. We shot the shit for a bit, eventually we said goodnight. Her last message though said that she would be in town until she had to go back to college later this month, that all her friends aren't in town and to let her know if I wanted to hang out, and she mentioned that she'd always found me interesting.
Do I read into this? Or is this just friendly and polite conversation?
polite conversation. Also be prepared that the average person's idea of the army is that all army are infantry and that you'll come back either dead, brain dead, or crippled and that only meatheads join. This isn't necessarily true but it's what a lot of your friends may think. Joining the army is not a bad option but the very idea tends to have an attached stigma in daily life.
Take it at face value for now.
She's probably just bored, wants to get out of the house, and you seem like a cool (and safe) enough guy to kill some time and hang with.
If anything further develops, you'll know (i'd hope anyway).
I hail from a pretty enlightened area of the country and she knows I was going for military intelligence. That's not really a factor at all.
You're probably right. I might make plans to hang out then. She was pretty cool so even just shooting the shit over lunch might be a good time.
>Date girl almost a year
>Stressful shit in both our lives
>Break up because no time for each other
>Avoid contact for a while
>Now forced to see each other because of college.
She's in one of my classes. I didn't really acknowledge her at all during class, but she waited at the door for me to walk out, got a coffee with me, and we caught up for like five hours afterward. We ended up getting into a few pretty deep conversations, about our fears, plans for the future, etc. Even when we were together we never got into topics like that every often.
A few of the things she said were just like, sad. Like she feels bad we broke up, or something.
She said she feels like she keeps making decisions without looking at how they may affect her life. She asked if I ever feel like when I try to change something in my life I end up in the same place. And then at one point she just kind of laughed and said I seem like I've grown since the last time we talked. She said she "sees a new light in me", and that she hopes I follow it to happiness.
I really don't know how to take any of that. I'm going to maintain contact with her and see what's up, but any ideas? I'm not jumping to conclusions, but I can't stop thinking about it. Is it normal to open up like that to your ex?
What nofapp supposedly does is make you more attractive to women and gives you bigger balls to talk to them as well, but I have not felt like that at all. Just the same me really, but maybe a bit more sexually frustrated.
Nofap might make you somewhat more horny, and more willing to leave your comfort zone. However the test shit is absolute nonsense.
If you look at the study people generally cite, it spiked on the ninth day or whatever but the testosterone levels normalized shortly thereafter.
Get the ones that flash lights when you run, that's what drives women crazy.
Asked this in a previous thread, but I think it'd be interesting to get more replies
Guys, would you rather date a girl who was terrible with money to the point where she was severely in debt, but paid her fair share in the relationship, or would you rather date a girl who expected you to provide for her?
Obviously you'd date neither, but if you had to pick one, which would it be?
I mean the first one sounds better in theory, but it's also unrealistic. There are tons of girls right now who expect to be provided for. But how many are there who are deep in debt but can somehow magically sustain paying a fair share? Creditors don't exactly go away and interest in a bitch. There's no long term picture there.
>Guys, would you rather date a girl who was terrible with money to the point where she was severely in debt, but paid her fair share in the relationship, or would you rather date a girl who expected you to provide for her?
Ehhh. Both sound pretty shit. I guess the former, IF she was willing to change those habits. It's not hard to keep tabs on where your money is going in and out if you actually record said info. After that, it's just a basic level of discipline.
Girl is into me and I like her as well. We have finals in 2-3 weeks. Would you ask her out now or wait until after finals? Don't want her to think that I'm not in interested, but also don't want to "ruin" our exams :/
Also what do you prefer for first date? Dinner?
It's possible. For example, a girl had maxed out her credit cards, but also earned enough money to pay for her living costs and pay off at least the minimum, but as soon as she paid off a significant amount, she'd spend it again. And don't forget the terrible with money part too - she could just be bad at prioritising or working out the most cost-efficient ways of doing things. Or might just want the best of the best even though she can't afford it
Asked in previous thread, but didn't get many answers.
1. Is it a turn off/considered weird by women my age that I'm a 19 year old male virgin? The best I've gotten is a HJ.
2. Is being 5'9" short enough to be a turn off to most women?
3. Is the fact that I have a 7 inch long 5 3/4 in thick dick a huge plus for women, or would they not really care?
That perfectly describes someone who is one car accident or severe illness away from total ruin. It makes sense mathematically but, as I said, it's unrealistic. Something eventually happens.
>but as soon as she paid off a significant amount, she'd spend it again.
Man is this supposed to be a girl you're interested in? Because this is just retarded. She has no self discipline with the way you describe her.
being 19 and a virgin isn't all that uncommon, relax
what's really unattractive to women are men who have some shitty complex about their height
your penis is fine, it's not the most important part of sex anyways
you're 19 and nervous, we've all been there. you're fine, everything is fine, nothing is wrong with you or your situation.
sex and relationships will happen. in the meantime work on yourself. become someone worthy of getting to know
Lost my virginity at 24. Who gives a fuck.
If you obviously do, so will they (because you're making a big deal of it and acting like a spaz)
If you don't, neither will they.
I was so lax about it my first time, they actually didn't even believe me (before or after).
I think it's odd. I literally just talked to a girl I haven't been on a first date with about our plans for the future. You really should be more open to people and more conscious of where you are in life.
But what if I'm the type of individual who always thinks things through first? What if I'm not just a stupid asshole that does everything spontaneously like everyone seems to be? Does that mean everyone who's married is stupid because they just outweighed their doubts with "fuck it!" One day and decides to get married?
Foremost, elevation and respect in their culture/community. Obviously that doesn't apply to everyone but it does cover a big chunk of the planet. That's true even in the western world for things like politics and business. You command a degree of respect for your apparent sense of responsibility for being married. So I think a good place to start would be to ask yourself if there are religious, cultural, career, etc. aspects of your present or future life which apply.
>Who gives a fuck.
Eh, some acquaintances were talking about some guy one of them was dating for a while. They made a big deal of the fact the guy had a number of firsts with them before they broke up in a negative way. That's mostly why it nags at me.
if there's any part of you that says no then the answer should be no
you're right, you shouldn't rush into marriage. that means you gotta listen to your doubts, however you want to compartmentalize them
>So a bad breakup left harsh feelings
Nah I meant she talked about him having firsts as a bad thing in and of itself. By her own admission she ended things because she was bored. I suppose it may have been a bigger deal than what she let on though.
>Is this a new thing or have men always felt inadequate about being virgins at such a young age?
It's a pretty common punching bag. I mean hell, they made an entire movie running on the gag the protagonist never got laid.
cyka this is not the sneakers this is the life
Have you never watched a B comedy about high schoolers or young college students? Or even Super Bad? Until you have lost it, losing your virginity is the ultimate goal for a lot of men.
>she ended things because she was bored.
Could be he was just boring and didn't know how to branch out.
To be honest, when it comes to sex, I could see why she'd say that. Maybe she was used to more adventure things, but all he knew or was comfortable with was vanilla.
But at the same time, that's a false conclusion. There are plenty of guys that are perfectly fine to be adventurous and explore their first time out.
Which, whatever she said, sounds more like sexual incompatibility over a "he was a virgin when we started problem".
Is it closed minded to think that if people want to advance with me as a guy they should be blunt about it? I don't even know if someone was hinting at me to begin with, but I don't tolerate that shit, so doesn't it make sense just to wait anyways for someone who isn't so fucking wishy washy?
It's not too old and so is growing out of larger markets. If you live outside of those major metro areas then I'm not surprised by your unfamiliarity. It also might not offer great pickings for you.
Im in a LDR with girl and we both love each other but we honestly dont have a lot in common besides our values and that we like spending time with each other. Is not having a lot of common interests coupled with the long distance going to threaten this relationship?
Yep. Shared experience is what grows a relationship and the momentum of growth is what keeps it alive. Without the context of common interests to inspire those experiences (and with distance getting in the way) you don't grow. When it stagnates, it dies.
Is it ok to take a girl swimming for a second date? She's pretty fit, likes swimming, wears little makeup and has dreadlocks. That is to say, she probably wouldn't feel insecure in the situation. I'd try my best not to make it pervy.
why not do something silly but cute. something that she won't forget and make her laugh? get a mini drone and keep flying small stuff over to her. a hersheys kiss, a small note, a little flower.
Me... personally... it would completely depend on the circumstances...
Would I sleep with someone knowing I was their first? Sure... I'd probably be ok guiding them along and making sure they were comfortable and could enjoy themselves.
Would I sleep with an 18 year old in general? ... dealing with girls that young (or guys for that matter I suppose) is kind of a can of worms in my experience...
An 18 year old virgin? I don't know... That's something where I'd really have to know them and their personality to be able to decide if that's a terrible idea or not
Still wondering. I actually mostly thought of swimming because it's a pretty forgiving environment if you're tired or have an upset stomach or something. We don't have the chance to see each other often and our first date was months ago, so it would be super shitty if we went to a restaurant or something and either of us wasn't feeling up to par, which would automatically ruin the experience. The main problem is that even though we've established a mutual romantic interest we haven't done anything physical yet and that could make things creepy.
Some tax breaks and some stuff about being able to visit each other in hospitals, make decisions if one of you is on life support etc. DESU you should be reading up on local laws instead of asking us. Generally though, there's no point unless you're like 40.
50% of US marriages end in divorce
My mom and dad were together 7 months before getting married and they've been together for 30 years
If you can live with someone for five whole years, I think you can spend the rest of your lives together
Not to mention there are some legal perks that come with marriage
Yes, compliment his looks but don't compare him to some celebrity. It's a meaningless compliment and I don't get why girls do this. If he really looks like the guy he's probably heard it before (and possibly tired of hearing it), and if he doesn't it's hard to take.
How much do you care about what a girl's vagina looks like? Mine is really ugly because I'm half beaner so my vagina is really brown and dark compared to my skin. And the inner labia are long and uneven. Am I doomed to be sexless forever?
guys usually don't care as long as they get some and your pussy is clean, smells fresh and you trimm your pubes. i used to be insecure about my pussy. it's not especially ugly, but one inner labia is a big bigger han the other and she's not as pink as i would like. then i gave birth and had a REALLY bad tear that fucked my shit up for good. that was the moment i said fuck it and stopped caring about how my pussy looks. as long as she gives me and my man pleasure, and is able to pop out babies, she's golden.
somehow it has been etablished that my bf and i always text and never call each other. i'm fine with that since i like the convenience to be able to asnwer when i got the time and i also dread phone calls. is tis something to be conecerned about or is it ok to only communicate via text?
>somehow it has been etablished that my bf and i always text and never call each other. i'm fine with that since i like the convenience to be able to asnwer when i got the time and i also dread phone calls. is tis something to be conecerned about or is it ok to only communicate via text?
While it's true this behavior is often associated with cheating or intention to cheat, it's more likely this is just a factor of the times we live in, where everyone texts, all the time.
My advice for you specifically: Talk to your BF about this and just make it clear that you don't like calling but hope you two are on the same page.
>How much do you care about what a girl's vagina looks like? Mine is really ugly because I'm half beaner so my vagina is really brown and dark compared to my skin. And the inner labia are long and uneven. Am I doomed to be sexless forever?
If you're a chick, it's impossible to be doomed to that.
Beyond that, make sure it smells nice and don't pleasure yourself with too many large items too often to keep it tight.
My gf discovered my tinder.
It was made quite a while ago and I thought I got rid of it but didn't delete it entirely.
We're going to be fine because I didn't make it to cheat on her, just because I was curious and she believes me.
My question is, what should I do about my friends that know I had one due to gossip or whatever. I think there may be some pics going around. I don't want to be seen as a cheater when I'm not one.
Well you should bring it up because you should make it clear to him that you don't like to call that often but you just want him to know that it doesn't mean anything and you want to just reassure him of that because you love him.
Also it allows him to confirm the same with you.
There's this girl that I like who seems really out going and loud when she's with other people. I'm not very talkative but I can hold up a conversation, but when we spend time together she's really quiet. Yet she seems to enjoy my company and likes to hang out with me and we keep doing that. I'm confused.
If I was to send a girl a message on Facebook saying "Hey, you want to grab lunch and shoot the breeze sometime this week?" would they possibly interpret that as a date? I just want to hang out with them platonically.
We know each other kinda well and occasionally send a message or two back and forth. It wouldn't just be out of the blue to a near stranger.
Doesn't date usually imply it's some kind of compatibility test/test run for a relationship? Or at least imply romantic interest and more dates to come if it works out alright?
I don't want to know if we could end up in a relationship. I just want to hang out, chat, and do it somewhere neutral and mutually appreciable, like over lunch.
These is a girl I've been friends with for a few months that I've really really liked. Well, she just told me yesterday that she likes me too. Good right? I can't explain this, but for some reason when she told me that. It like killed my interest in her. It doesn't make sense, I've liked her for a while. She's all-around great! But when she told me she liked it, it was like a turn off. I don't understand.
But the thing is I should be grateful. Personally, I think she's above my league. Like she's too good for me. So I should be thrilled she likes me. But I'm not. Wtf is wrong with me
it's the hunt. don't worry. you have etablished before that you like her and it's mutual. now go from there and new things will wash over that feeling. it's temporary. there will be lot's of exciting moments. first kiss, first sex, bla and bla
>My gf discovered my tinder.
>It was made quite a while ago and I thought I got rid of it but didn't delete it entirely.
>We're going to be fine because I didn't make it to cheat on her, just because I was curious and she believes me.
>My question is, what should I do about my friends that know I had one due to gossip or whatever. I think there may be some pics going around. I don't want to be seen as a cheater when I'm not one.
Bumping this question from earlier.
Girl likes me, I like her. It just feels strange when I try to see from her perspective on why she likes me. I don't understand, I don't like myself. So sometimes it makes me feel awkard or uncomfortable that she thinks of cuddling and stuff with me. Even though I like her a lot. What makes you attracted to someone? Looks wise I'm probably a 5/10. She's a 8/10 to me. She's complimented me before on how very respectful I've been to her. But I don't see how that could be enough to like someone
I'm a 25 y.o. hkv. I've accepted I'm going to die this way.
I just remembered one time in hs a girl was going around the hall and hugging people. she hugged everyone. except me. she hugged the person right next to me on either side.
What does this mean.
Why the fuck do you expect girls here to know why one specific girl did something?
>What makes you attracted to someone?
This is a bit more complicated than words can explain. If she likes you, isn't that enough?
You're fickle. Just go on a date with her.
>Why the fuck do you expect girls here to know why one specific girl did something?
i wasn't thinking you'd know the exact answer, but i thought maybe someone would speculate.
sorry i'm fucking retarded and worthless
I met this guy at orientation yesterday. He was one of the ones helping out the newer students/answering questions about college life. We started chatting, he was answering my questions, etc. I guess one of the teachers recommended to exchange numbers/contact information to those who shared the same major, and coincidentally, we both did.
We've been talking through text messages, and he said I looked nice, wants to help me out if I need it, says he cooks, wants to cook for me, etc.
Do you think he likes me romantically? I'm kinda scared because I'm not looking for a relationship other than friendship at the moment. He is of different race which is not a problem at all to me, but my dad and some of my other relatives are racist. I really want to focus on my studies, improving myself, and making friends, but I don't want to hurt him if he does like me in that way.
Sorry for the long text. Thanks in advance!
Oh geez. Thanks for answering, anon.
It's weird because we literally met yesterday. Our conversation was pretty normal. I don't flirt and I think I'm kinda plain looking. I don't know how he could see me like that so quickly.
I hope that's the case, but I can't read what kind of person he is in a days time. Guess I'll just have to go with the flow and see if he says anything obvious. Thanks again for the input.
I guess you just didn't seem huggable?
Maybe she was only hugging people she knew. Maybe you looked uncomfortable so she didn't want to bother you. Maybe you looked intimidating and she was scared. Maybe you looked smelly. Maybe she was a bitch who wanted to make you feel bad by excluding you.
Multiple reasons. Dominance, aggression, and strength go hand in hand with masculinity and that is conventionally, universally, and generally attractive.
When you are forced into (fantasy) sex, you don't have any responsibility. That means anything that happens and any pleasure you feel aren't your fault. You don't have to worry about preforming or making decisions. You just let go.
Many people, especially many women, enjoy the submissive role. Some take it to an extreme and enjoy elements of degradation and pain.
Sounds like he's interested, but he doesn't sound like he's enamored. Nip it in the bud while you can, be straightforward about it too.
Also, decide if you wanna fuck him anyways.
Fingered my virgin gf for the first time last week and stopped when she suddenly starte crying. When I started she was moaning with pleasure, but what I didn't realise was those moans were later replaced with moans of pain. She wasn't able to talk or tell me anything and both moans sounded exactly the same to me. I felt so bad afterwards - I don't want to hurt her, but I don't know how to avoid it if even a finger causes her pain. She was so tight too, I doubt I would be able to have proper vaginal sex with her. Can anyone give me advice on how to finger my gf without hurting her, or how to move up to sex?
Is it considered being friendzoned if I've been friends with this girl for a few years now, and while I did like her at one point and did get rejected by her, right now I know I dont have a shot and dont have feelings for her (besides wanting to bang her)?
I recently got a new girl friend. Before we started going out I was interested in a different girl, and we went on a few dates together, but she always took around a week to respond to my messages and I got the distinct feeling that she wasn't interested so I just moved on.
A few days ago, after I told her I am dating someone else, the girl I wa previously interested in sent me a message along the lines of "how's it going with your new girlfriend?", to which I responded "it's going great".
She then sent me a message that said something like "actually I had a bit of a crush on you so I was jelous to hear about your new girlfriend. Oh well...", to which I just sent something like "Thanks, but sorry".
My question is, why on earth would anyone send a message like that? What could that girl possibly hope to achieve now that I'm dating someone else? And if she was interested in me, why was she acting so cold and distant?
Anyway, I'm happy with my current gf, I'm just baffled by this girls thought process.
Technically, but its irrelevant.
Its like, it doesnt matter if youre brozoned by a sister.
It's honesty and a compliment, as well as well wishes and the offer for the future. She's letting you know she doesn't want to get in your way, but would givr you a shot if ut doesnt work out with your gf
>live with mother
>have no car
Which of these should I fix first? I make $3000 a month, even a basic apartment in my city is like $1200, and while a car would be cheaper ($250/mo insurance), I think living with my mother is the bigger flaw.
Why do I hang on when I should just let him go? We were engaged years ago and hadn't spoken a word to each other in years after breaking up. Recently we rekindled but it got complicated and he abruptly cut off all contact, but not before telling me that we can talk when "things settle down". It's been two months and I still think of him every day. I want to say something to him but I'm afraid I'd get hurt again. The lack of closure is what hurts the most. Should I just come out and say something so that he can reject me/accept me? The not knowing is killing me.
What are some obscure things that I could be doing that might be turning women off of me?
None of my friends, male or female, can come up with any answer as to why I'm not getting dates or laid. They're all always trying to wingman me, hook me up with women, etc, and it never works out. They're always left mystified and the best answer they can come up with was "she wasn't right, I guess" but it's been years on end of this shit.
Well it wasnt exactly that, shit was just awkward and we just became friends afterward. Should I kill the friendship since friendzone friendships tend to be grating? she's cool and I dont see anything ever happening between us but is it unhealthy to remain friends with her?
You're not really her friend. You're just a guy hoping to get laid. Yeah you should cut the act and stop pretending now, there's no such thing as a friendzone friendship. You either want to be friends with someone without ulterior motives or you don't.
Nothing, because I don't get any.
I haven't had a single date or anything since I broke up with my exgf 3 years ago.
It's just a repetitive cycle of situations where a girl seems interested, my friends encourage me, I try to make something happen, and they tell me they're not interested. My friends are often within earshot when it happens and they always say I didn't do anything wrong, that it was just bad luck or whatever.
Sometimes I feel like I just give off bad pheremones or something, nothing I try works, and nobody involved ever manages to provide any decent advice about why not.
Also, I hate to double post, but I just feel like I get so many fewer opportunities than my friends, and I don't understand why. I'm not antisocial, we usually all go out together, meet the same people, etc. Everybody tells me I'm really fun to talk to, that I'm plenty attractive, etc, but somehow I get so many fewer chances than my friends do, and I don't get why.
I'm so frustrated right now, I had to leave my group's Facebook group because I couldn't stand watching my friend post about how this cute girl he'd only met once was relentlessly pursuing him, and all of them talking about recent times that had happened to them and stuff. These guys don't even try at all and women come flocking to them, and yet I have no luck whatsoever in the same situations.
They try to "help" me and just end up confused about why it doesn't just "happen" for me like it does for them, and it drives everybody involved absolutely nuts. There's nothing obvious that makes us different, we're all pretty similar in terms of physical and social gifts. I feel so bad that all of these people go out of their way for me and just end up frustrated.
I definitely suffer from a lack of confidence, but I wasn't always this way, it's something that's built up over years of rejection and failure, and, I mean, how am I supposed to force confidence when I've had nothing but negative experiences?
Hooked up might be an overstatement. Friends introduce me to women, we talk a bit, there's no chemistry, and it ends there. Sometimes we talk occasionally as friends or whatever. There's just always an obvious lack of interest on their part, so it becomes awkward small talk for a while.
I've tried various stuff when they did seem interested, but it never seems like I have much of an opening to try much. There's always a "wall" between me and women and it never seems to drop.
Don't take this the wrong way, but I feel like when you're with your friends, your lack of confidence shows in your countenance. They're probably standing up straight, smiling at everyone, and being generally charismatic/likable while you force smiles and try to hide sad eyes while hunched over a little.
I wish I knew what to do about it. My confidence just keeps getting beaten down lower and lower, and I don't get how I'm supposed to pull it out of the gutter, every rejection just makes me worse off the next time around.
It's not like I can go with the usual routine of improving the rest of my life either, because I'm actually pretty confident about most things - I'm extremely good at my career, I'm aware my appearance is fine, I have a nice new car, etc. It's only with women that my situation is so bad.
Sometimes I just think my "compatibility" is extremely low or rare or something, it's like 99.9% of the women I meet have no interest whatsoever, and then that last tenth of a percent are incredibly attracted to me, the only reason I'm not a "KV" and have had a long-term relationship is because those women made it incredibly clear. That stuff sort of worked out back when I was young and everybody was single and I had lots of opportunities to meet women, but now that I'm almost 30 the pool I can draw from is so small that it's years between meeting anybody that "clicks" with me to that level.
Your lack of confidence is what's sabotaging you. Girls can sense when someone is forcing themselves to be brave, it's like an instinct for them. How you're standing, your tone, your entire demeanor, if anything is even off they'll pick up on it. Obviously you can't be perfect on all these and you're taking the rejections way too personally.
How am I supposed to NOT give off that impression, then? Am I supposed to just give up on women for the rest of my life, or sit around waiting for the small chance that I get lucky and find somebody who can look past it or that things just happen naturally with?
Also, is it worth mentioning that I find it really easy to end up in platonic friendships with women I initially approached out of interest, only to find out that they were already in relationships?
So I work at this store. Im new there, and there's this sort of cute girl there. I was working on the cashier, it was a slow day, and the girl goes behind me all by herself working on the bookshelves. She's at the end of is aisle, so to me, I'm thinking she wants me to make a move and talk to her since she's alone, right behind me, while the rest of our coworkers are doing something else. So instead of me introducing myself since I'm new, I just walk by her.
I honestly don't think she was working, and I think she was trying to get my attention because there was nothing to be done in that aisle.
I want to try it again during my next shift and was thinking about saying, "I don't believe we met yet. I'm blank"
You think that's good? What are some other small things to talk about that could open us up more into a friendship?
It's an energy you give out or evoke about you. People want to talk to fun positive people. Even talking to you right now online is a chore for cause you're so negative and whiny. And I'm not saying this to be mean cause we're on 4chan, but as advice. If you're talking to someone and you say, "Wow well don't you just hate...or wow this place sucks...or I can't believe how dumb this thing is" if that's your tone while talking to people you already put them in a negative mood and they automatically close off. That and the self pity of saying:
>Am I supposed to just give up on women for the rest of my life
That statement in and of itself is so inappropriate and a debbie downer. You're *only* 30, luck has very little to do with it, you could meet someone who you click with 100% without really trying, but majority of the girls out there won't have even 50% chemistry with you, so you gotta be interesting to them.
Sorry to make it a chore. I don't mean that passive aggressively, I feel bad, I hope you can at least believe that I'm not normally like this and that I'm just having a really shitty evening.
I'm generally told that I'm really interesting and fun to talk to, and I'm not negative at all in social conversation. I actually really enjoy talking to people, especially if they happen to be women that I'm attracted to, and usually am having enough fun while doing it that I'm not inclined to be negative at all when making normal conversation.
I think the problem is that I get nervous as soon as I start thinking about making any kind of move, and that nervousness leads to negative stuff in the back of my head, which ruins everything.
Different anon but you sound just like me. I'm finally recovering from my lack of confidence and I feel like girls are starting to like me more. You should try another approach, think of your hobbies/passions and try to get a girl to accompany you with said hobby. I'm a cyclist and and last week I straight up told a girl she was really pretty an that we should ride bikes together sometime(I have two bikes) and so now I have a date on Monday. I'm hoping it goes well. Use what makes you happy to your advantage.
I know how it works. I mean when the thread is outdated, someone starts another thread with same related pic and text, after it ends, another one is started, and again and again.
That's a good start. Don't assume she's into you though, we do stuff like that just to size up the newbie all the time. As for other things to talk about, ask her how long she's worked there, if there's anything you should know about the place etc.
We really can't tell from one post alone. It could be a million things
Car, though I wouldn't care much about either
I don't know, I don't see the point in what she did either
Does it matter?
How would I know?
Any of a number of things. That's far too abstract of a question
I don't even check height. I guess general build?
Does it matter? She likes you. If it bothers you, ask her, not us.
You liked the chase and the idea of being in a relationship with her, but you're not sure if you actually want to be in a relationship with her
I always thought of friendzone as person A wants to date person B, but person B just wants to be friends. People being rude or whatever afterwards was a separate issue. God there are so many interpretations of that term nowadays.
In which case sure, but it's not really a bad thing from my perspective. If you were still hung up on her there would be issues.
Car gives better job options, which in turn makes moving out easier.
How do I deal with a girl who's attracted to me but is very reserved about it? If we hung out regularly I'm sure she'd open up eventually but we have no chance of doing that. I'd like to find out if we can be more than friends before looking at other girls but I'm afraid of her rejecting me just because it's too early. Should I trust that even if she'd ideally spend more time together before establishing a romantic interest, she'll respond well if I confront her about my feelings now, if there is even the smallest realistic chance.
>Obviously you'd date neither, but if you had to pick one, which would it be?
I would only date the kind of woman that would expect me to provide for her, but she needs to entirely traditional.
The girl I want to ask out is being kinda wishy washy recently and I don't know if I've blown it yet.
>knew from jr. High / HS, didn't talk a lot.
>graduated last year
>had a college class together
>got to know each other, frequent DMs and late night talks
>asked to get coffee and study before finals but we both got too busy with last minute essays and cancelled
>a few days after classes end talks get less frequent, sometimes no reply
>sometimes she messages me out of nowhere to talk
>last couple weeks I have to message first, and talks are short and she doesn't reply to me sometimes after like 4 - 5 messages back & forth
Should I just stop and wait and see if she messages first, or go after it? She still regularly (and usually quickly) views my snapchat story, likes my tweets, etc. I just feel like I'm bothering her but I want to talk and ask her to get coffee again, since we no longer have class together.
Need help on deciphering and what to do
>met this girl in my class last year
>we start getting close and hang/study together, start to develop a crush on her
>eventual notice she likes me
>too anxious to do anything and then never see her again
>fast forward to last week, find out she's in one of my classes
>we both say hi, she seems cheerful seeing me
>then next lecture, I see her again but she acts cold, not interested in talking
>eventually says she's going to start sitting in the front
Any explanation for the mood shift and is she still mad at me for not responding before?
I think it's too late, but would telling her the truth about how I feel be a good decision?
How do you know she's attracted to you? I'm in a very similar situation and have been for the past couple months. I'm interested in a really shy girl who I just can't read at all. I'm just going to "yolo" it and ask her out to lunch sometime this week. May as well. If she rejects me, at least I'll know and I won't even have to see her again so why not? I suggest taking the same approach.
Because I know her already and want to spend more time alone with her. Besides I asked her if she wanted to see the new SW movie again, because she's a SW fan. I also asked her to go out to eat something together first. I think it should be pretty obvious that I meant as a date, but she either doesn't understand it, or she ignores it. I don't know how to tell her I meant it as a date.
She has traveled 120 miles just to hang out with me, twice. The other time we only had coffee for an hour and she went straight back to home, and she knew in advance that I would only have time for that. When we're together she often blushes and breathes heavily, smiles a lot and seems overall happy to be with me.
But she's so indirect in conversation. When I suggest a meeting, she always responds with "why not", like she might as well come along because she has nothing better to do. When I set up an opportunity for a compliment by expressing concern about being too boring or something, she doesn't say "I think you're interesting", she says "I don't think it's necessary to be chatty to be interesting". She's not very keen on instant messaging but she has initiated a convo a couple of times when I haven't messaged her for a long time.
Femanon here, if a guy friend asks me to meet up, even though he knows I'm taken, is he trying to get a date with me? Or just meeting as friends?
I'm confused and my bf is kinda pissed at me and thinks I'm naive.
My close friend tried to make me suck his friends dick and record it, i refused to and he got mad at me for it. Then i cried to his friend about how i love him and he just treats me like shit (i was high as shit).
I felt so disrespected that i emailed his ex, and i've been texting her. We basically ranted to eachother about what hes done to us, but I still have feelings for him and Im terrified of him finding out about this. After the way he treated me i thought there would be no chance and I might as well, then a few days later were hanging out again and fucking like usual except he was being 100x nicer. I don't know how he would react if he found out I've been contacting his ex so much just to talk shit about him.
But one of the things she told me, is that when he was talking to a few of our friends about me he said "im gonna take that bitches virginity and train her to be a lil hoe". He did take my virginity. Another thing I discovered is that at the same exact show, he kissed his ex on stage (there were 40+ people on the stage there was no security) and kissed me backstage. He also pulled a girls shirt down at that show (unrelated tho).
Is this really that big of a deal?? or did i betray him by talking shit with his ex?? wouldn't it be a little justified??
Go for it man. Like I said, what've you got to lose? She sounds interested to me. Remember, not everyone responds to situations the way you want/expect them to. It doesn't necessarily mean that they don't mean the same thing.
Sounds like an absolute fucking douchebag to me. I don't know where you're from, but where I'm from attempting to force anyone into a sexual situation is completely unacceptable and unforgivable. You deserve better. If you continue to be involved with this person, you will only continue to be subjected to this sort of behaviour and it will in fact escalate over time.
I'm meeting her next week. I was on the verge of calling it a date when I made the suggestion but backed down and decided we'd have one more casual meeting before I express any romantic interest. I don't know if it's a good idea to test the waters now when she expects us to hang out as friends like before. I'll see where it goes.
She said "sure", but didn't seem very interested, then we agreed to pick a day for next week over FB. This was last thursday. I asked her the day after if wednesday was alright. Then she didn't reply before wednesday evening saying "I don't think I can. How about next week?". This made me sure she wasn't interested, so I told her "If you don't want to go see it with me, you could have just told me from the beginning" thinking that would be a good thing to say. But she answered me just now with "?" "Does that mean no?"
I don't understand her, and I don't know what to reply.
I think the best option is to tell her this and then judge by her reaction if she was just clueless or she doesn't really give a shit.
If she doesn't give a shit and you can tell, I would just drop her.
Women can what youd for a guy with a large dick to do in bed.
I have a large penis. Like 8x6. But I feel like it makes me shit in bed.
I cant go balls deep. I cant let loose and thrust as hard as possible because ill hit her cervix. I cant go fast because shes being stretched.
I feel like I cant really have fun in bed because of it and am limited to slow shallow strokes.
Looking for advice from women about what they did to make sex more exciting to get around my problems. Guys can help but you cant really trust a guy to know what a woman likes.
Is "so, you been on many dates before?" an ok question to ask a girl on the first date? I'm asking this for a specific situation since I am 99% sure this girl has not been on a date before. Neither have I so I would just respond "yeah, me neither". I was thinking it could be a way to get her to feel more comfortable knowing that I haven't been on one either.
>a little timid or reserved
Where do I find a girl like this?
Question for Asian girls.
How are white boyfriends who are not rich generally received by Asian parents? Specifically culturally Christian Koreans.
I'm meeting the folks next month. 3 states away, so far I am not even allowed to sleep over their house, not even on the couch.
the race is the bigger issue than the money, and also the reputation that whites would not be a good husband because all of us are whores/irresponsible and just want to have fun. so you'll need to be prove otherwise with time.
My girlfriend says I'm not sexually aggressive enough and am not sexually spontaneous. She says if she's sitting on the couch with me, I should just start eating her out, or if I'm behind her going up the stairs I should grab her butt, or if I'm feeling frisky just rip her clothes off and fuck her.
I don't really know what to make of this, this seems a little extreme for me. How can I be more spontaneous without bordering on rape?
If you start doing something she doesn't want you to do at the time, she'll let you know. I was pretty spontaneous with my ex and she enjoyed it, but occasionally she wouldn't be in the mood. I'd never just start ripping her clothes off, though.
Ease into it, and you'll get more comfortable with it.
My ex got off on me having my hands on her neck when we fucked. Not choking her, just like a dominating hold. Try putting your hand on her neck when you're making out for starters, squeezing lightly.
How would you feel if you were on a date with someone and they said something like 'Oh I hate dating... it feels too much like a job interview for me, and I don't like that because I'm shy and overthink everything. My idea of a perfect relationship starts with friendship and grows into something else after, not the other way around' ? So not said in a bitter way, but just admitting some of my insecurities about dating in a jokey way, while we're actually on a date.
Reason: For various reasons I don't have much of a social circle right now so I don't meet any girls that way, so I've turned to Tinder (even though I dislike it and the sorts of things it stands for) to try and meet girls.
>Oh I hate dating...
>on a date
Are you retarded or? Dude. Wtf? None of what you said is necessary. If you ask a girl on a date, you go to have fun and meet someone new. It isn't an interview. It's a night out with someone who could be your new friend, could be your new partner, or could be nothing at all. Learn to lighten up. You sound like a drag to be around. Any girl who hears "I hate dating" is going to hear "I hate commitment and this is just a hook up for me."
No but I'd probably ask why we couldnt use regular condoms. I've never even seen one in real life and they just seem bizarre to me.
I just treat her as an acquaintance and keep things brief if I'm uncomfortable with it. Anything else is probably overkill.
Seems sketchy. I hang out with women one on one, but we've known each other for a good while and I'm not interested in them. I can't fault your bf for being uncomfortable with this situation.
what is your reaction to guys who get sweaty pits? Not absurd amounts, just get damp enough to feel through a regular t shirt. I have this problem despite that I put on deodorant, it usually helps if my deodorant is antiperspirant, however I'm stuck with some non-antiperspirant stuff that I have now. And I'm about to get more intimate with girlfriend than we've ever been before. We haven't had sex yet, just some kissing and cuddling but tonight she mentioned wanting to do more but possibly not go the whole way.
TLDR: I'm about to love upon my girlfriend but am worried about sweaty pits and how it might ruin the moment.
Take a shower together. For one, it's sexy and intimate without going the whole way. Secondly, no worries about your pits. Third, after you're done making out and groping in the shower, you can take it to the bed and see if she's down to go further. Chances are she will be, because the shower thing gets girls all fired up.
God that's genius. Thanks anon, you might have just saved the day.
Doesn't bother me nor flatter me. When it comes to the stuff guys beat their dick to, nothing surprises me.
I've never masturbated to the thought of guys I know unless it's my boyfriend. I get off by recalling how their dick feels. If I don't know what a guy's dick feels like, I can't do anything with the thought.
1) How to initiate physical contact? I'm good with words and could talk for hours but I just don't know where to start when it comes to touching a woman. It's an issue as on the first date this girl said we talked too much.
2) I'm going on a second date with the girl of question 1 (last time was 3 months ago). Is it okay to bring a rose or is it too clichè? Alternatively I was thinking something like a bracelet with her name on it.
I'm a 22 yo guy, she's 20 if that helps.
Considering girls start 15 then go to college and fuck a different guy every weekend it's rational to be anxious in your 20s as a guy, 0 partners is a long way from the dozens an average girl will have had.
Plus they'll break up with you if you tell them, or if you don't they'll break up with you just because you're bad in bed. It's basically the point of no return past 21.
what do girls think about guys cumming on them?
i have a close friend that i frequently have sex with. we've been using condoms but recently she's been ok with no condom (she's on birth control) after telling me how much better it feels. i normally just cum on her stomach but it's kind of inconvenient, but she hasnt really said she didn't want me to do it either.
lmao don't bring a fucking gift on the second date you fucking sperg.
if you want physical contact, TRY TO TOUCH HER. move your hand over the side of her face when you're kissing, hold her hand, shit like that.
idk what to tell you if you can't get that far. normally in my relationships girls are ok with me fingering them by the second date, and then you progress from there. just slide your hand down her stomach and see her reaction. if she stops you obviously you fucked up
Thanks for answering.I have nothing to say about the sperg either as I've never been on a second date. I don't wanna fuck up anything so last stupid question: should I just go for the kiss or do I have to say some sentence to get into the mood before?
Last time I made out with a girl I knew she wanted me because she rejected all the other guys in the room.
if she's on a date with you, you should ASSUME she wants you. girls are humans, they arent going to let you do shit that they don't want. go until they stop you. if it's your first time kissing them it should come with some quirky eye contact and a decent conversation before hand. basically, it has to be going well BEFORE the kiss for it to be "successful". otherwise you don't need any cues and shouldnt expect any
Again, thank you so much. I have more or less 10 days till we meet. On a positive note, I know what kind of people she likes and what she is into (she told me explicitly) so I know what to say to her. You helped me clear the negative sides. Only thing I gotta do now is make sure I talk to her and not just cold text her a few days before the date, even if I have exams upcoming.
Anyone else find perverted girls annoying as shit? I mean as a kid I was like "oh gee willikers a girl who talks about her boobies" but after you grow up and you date and all that they come off as what I imagine creepy sex obsessed guys come off as to girls.
interesting. i just assumed it was something that porn girls did just for the paycheck.
she has baby wipes in her drawer so i help her clean it off (yes that sounds beta as fuck) because i feel bad otherwise, but maybe i'll keep it up unless she tells me to not do it.
Am I really an ass for giving my 'gf' some of her own medicine?
She used to date a friend of mine, whom she cheated many times. I asked her out and made her my 'gf' only to cheat on her (which I'm currently doing, she just found out) and make her feel like my friend felt when she did the same to him.
My male friends think it's cool and she deserves it, my female friends think I'm being an ass.
Can there be a consensus?
The consensus is that you have lowered yourself to her unethical level. You are not righteous nor greater for having done it. You are simply the same as her. I find that kind of behavior repulsive across the board.
In private my girlfriend is perverted as fuck and it's pretty amazing in bed. But she also knows how to keep that under wraps and function like an adult otherwise, and you would never suspect.
On the other hand...
One of my worst (and funniest) online date's ever was one where, in the first 15 minutes, she asked me what my astrological sign and race was, and said, "Oh haven't been with either of those yet", and made sure to let me know she had condoms and the Implant if I wanted to go raw.
The entire time in my head I was just like... Breath woman. I've known you for all half an hour... I get it, you want sex, but don't make 80% of the conversation about it, i just met you, it's still daylight, and you seem nice otherwise, but you're definitely making yourself look crazy and desperate.
No really, are you male or female?
Who am I kidding, don't bother with a man's affair, dear. There's a reason it goes "bros before hoes".
Yeah... you're kind of an ass. Maybe more of an ass.
She's a cheating slut.
You're a manipulative cheating asshole.
There was this girl a while ago who posted about her friend who would intentionally seduce committed/married men and get them to cheat on their significant others with her, and then afterwards tell the significant others what happened. Her justification was, "I was just proving to them they shouldn't be together and exposing them."
Your justification is bordering along that line of logic.
He isn't manipulating anyone, she chose him and she got a taste of her own shit. Also that femanon may be a sociopath but objectively she's done nothing wrong. Cheaters deserve this. I can tell you've cheated just by the way you cover for them.
No, since I'm not one. If someone asked me if I have gone on many dates before, I'd say, "No. I've gone on two dates before."
I still wouldn't be pleased that he was trying to decide if I was a slut. People have their own opinions and that's fine. I just am not going to date a guy who so blatantly bases his value of a girl off of her sexual experience. Think what you will, I just don't want that in my life.
Are you two me? Exact same situation and I'd say there's a really high chance that she's interested in me . She is shy around me but not others and always smiles when I'm walking towards her/looking at her. Will ask her out next week or in 2 weeks for lunch
I'm in love with my boyfriend, and he is fairly mentally ill (due to abuse and environmental things) & suffers from daily panic attacks and is currently in ongoing treatment for all of this. We are temporarily LDR and will be living with one another in a little over a year (doing our masters at the same school). My main questions is how can I support him and be there for him? Like I know generally how, but sometimes I feel like I don't do enough.
Koreans/Japanese are all extremely racist. No joke, that's the way it is in their culture. South Koreans even hate refugees from North Korea. Disgusting society in both countries imo
>I'm going to manipulate someone to get something I want (sex), and not feel bad about manipulating them because they deserve to be hurt anyway. Ergo, what I'm doing is actually a good thing.
It's the same weird self-justification to do things that even they themselves would consider shitty under any other circumstance.
Never cheated, and it's the one thing in a relationship with me I would never forgive (because I'm all about open lines of communication, and if it got to that point, and instead of talking, cheating occur. That relationship isn't worth shit).
I also just happen to find maliciously manipulative people equally reprehensible.
He's intentionally maneuvered a situation with the endgame intent of causing harm.
I heard of a Korean that was born and grew up in Japan, but since his parents were native Koreans he was forever known as "that foreign guy". If you go out of the touristy areas you'll see businesses with signs that say "no foreigners allowed". It's racist as hell over there, but I would like to visit Japan at some point, because I've heard stories from multiple sources that girls over there jump on white dick.
I'm a male, but I'm half-korean, and grew up for a part of my life in a korean community.
My dad was not AT ALL well accepted.
Korean's, particularly korean's in the U.S. are VERY entrenched in superficial values.
They're all about status. If you don't go to a famous school (not necesarily good, just famous), drive a nice shinny car, and have a nice house, you're of a lower class (it doesn't matter if you have to take out crippling loans and several mortgages on your house, as long as everything LOOKS pretty).
You're going to be fighting an uphill battle.
For my dad, it wasn't until maybe 10-15 years in to me being born (by which time he'd gone from having nothing, to starting his own multi-million dollar company) that he even started to be really accepted.
i'm not a girl, but my family is chinese and currently lives in the US. my sisters are both dating white guys that they met at their colleges (not high tier collegs, just state universities). my parents don't like them, but they don't do anything to actively stop them dating either.
it really depends if you want the parents blessing or not. i think if you win the girls heart, you have the girl and don't need the parents.
>I've heard stories from multiple sources that girls over there jump on white dick.
Japanese woman here.
They're likely lying. The main reason for this myth is that japanese girls never say 'no' if you ask them out, but they do it out of politeness - their number will be fake or they will never answer your calls.
Everyone who goes overseas lies about having a bunch of sex. It doesn't happen that way, less in Japan where our culture has very traditional values regarding sex-behavior.
There's a girl at work and I'm:
-Avoiding looking at her
-Pretending she isn't around
-Avoiding crossing her
I'm pretty much acting coldy, but the twist is I fucking like her so much. I was friendly with her before but I've been thinking about her so much that it turned into an obsession.
I think she likes me, but she probably has a bf...should I just leave shit as is?
Well, it started as an accident and just continued from there.
I was thinking about her and suddenly she appeared in front of me in the hallway, I got scared shitless as if I got caught with my pants down or something.
I literally just stayed behind my friends and looked dead ahead as if I never saw her.
Fuck it, nevermind.
Obviously in Japan.
It's not a thing of Japanese people by the fact they are Japanese, but a cultural-related behaviour.
If you're Japanese and grew up in the united states, culturally speaking, you are american.
I'm sorry to break that hope, but it would only happpen in a burdel.
My gf got an abortion and has talked about suicide.
So I'm waiting until she initiates any sex. I thought this was a good idea, but a couple of people on another site called me beta. Am I doing the right thing? Idk how long it will take until she feels in the mood again. It just seems like I'd be an asshole to be pushy at all in a time like this.
This Monday, I'm getting lunch with a girl that I met on tinder a few months ago. Before this we went on two dates in November. On the second date things were getting pretty heated, clothes came off and all that. Problem is, I'm a virgin, and also very self-conscious about my body and felt that this girl was too good for me. I ended up psyching myself out, and couldn't really get an erection, in fact I remember that I was shaking pretty hard during all of this. We ended up stopping because she said we were "taking things too fast". We watched some Netflix and cuddled, and before I left she kissed me and said she'd see me later. I texted her the next day asking if we could talk about what happened last night, and she was pretty distant and said that she had just gotten out of a relationship and she wasn't sure if she was ready for something serious again. I was devastated because I felt that she was just letting me down easy, and that basically I had fucked up by getting too anxious. After that we pretty much cut contact. I've been dwelling on this ever since it happened because not only was it extremely embarrassing for me, I also really liked this girl and was upset that I basically destroyed any chance of a relationship with her. Or so I thought.
I messaged her out of the blue like 45 minutes ago just to see how her winter break was going. I honestly didn't expect a response, so I was surprised when she replied moments later. We ended up talking about how our breaks were going. She ended up saying that we should hang out sometime and I asked her if she wanted to get lunch and catch up, and she agreed.
Girls, guys, or anyone with an iota of relationship experience, how do I not fuck this up? I am honestly completely baffled at how different she was acting towards me today compared to when we last spoke in November.