this is quite a long story, i dont know how to go back to my own thread so if ever i get lost ill just repost the whole story since im saving a draft
>Be me 29. at the office while writing this.. not thingking straight anymore
>browse and see many them feels stories
>thought maybe if i share mine i will feel less (whatever it is im feeling)
>No spagheti No dinosaurs here
>this is what really is happening to me now
>bit of background
>6/10 maybe 7/10 guy me.
>Confidence 9/10...so add it up roughly 8/10 me
>never remembered that i was a beta since i started liking girls
>can easily talk to them..like breathing
>(not main story but i think somehow someway she had an effect on how or what i am now)
>call her 'cool'
>cool is my first 'real girlfriend' (serious girlfriend)
>Me and the gang where always hanging out and somehow Cool ended up hanging out with us which is a bit odd since she is a grade older than us
>cant recall it really so fckit
>tomboyish , short hair, petite, 'one of them boyz type'
>but she's a cheer dancer of the school, and boy she can move!
>she's also a womens varsity player of the school, and boy she can move! (but of course not as good as my crossovers!)
>She's my first fck.. it was the best!
>ofcourse i thought it was by that time since it was my first!
>Im also hers so its quite tight (even though my "energizer bunny" is not that big lol!)
>yes i named it that but not because its that small but it can go on and on and on!...or maybe its that small? hahah fck it enough bout me
>life is good, weekly f*ck at her place
>long story short thought she was the one
>i can trust this girl
>how dumb of me
>after 2 years she goes to college and me still on highschool
>one day thought about suprising her going to her place without telling her
>quietly sneaked at the backdoor
>slowly opened the door
>found her on top of a guy
>first thought was deymn she does have moves!
>F*CK IT! i stormed inside
>grabbed a baseball bat which is conveniently lying at the side of the backdoor i came in. raised it up my head and shouted on top of my lungs while briskly walking towards them!
>i kicked my girlfriend in the face immediately knocking her off
>i promise that i can sense the last thing she was thinking was 'what the hell hit my face?"
>she was out cold on the floor now
>then with all my strenght i gripped the bat and smashed that m*therf*ckin guys face maybe a couple of hundred times before i realized that there was a pool of blood covering the floor and half my vision is looking through a stream of blood.
>Then i came in to my senses
>like stepback from reality
>apparently it all just ran through my mind
>thats what i should have done!
>but i did not. instead i froze like a stone cold statue
>COld sweat running down my neck but i can feel my ear slowly warming up like its in an oven
>I literally dont know how to feel. I know im angry. I know i want to cry
>Im a pussy so i just channeled my anger down my fist and thrust it down to the marble floor while crying
>a loud thud stopped them from what they where doing
>they see me now
>they immidiately dressed up
>the guy dashed quickly out
>honestly this is the feeling that i would never even wish towards someone i hate. thats how bad it was
>thought i could trust you! i said. sh*t thought you were the one i said!
>sorry was all i can read from her mouth but that word did not register to my mind the way it was meant to mean.
>she somehow convinced me that she did wrong and somehow convince me that we should f*ck
>stupid that i was, i oblidged
>i was crying while doing it
>like a dirty whore is what im feeling. maybe even worse coz i continued the deed that was not finished by that guy coz i interupted
>i realy felt sh*t
> i remembered that guy! he was the one you introduced to me the other week as friend of your older sister who came by that time to borrow something!
>but I was too emotionaly and physicaly weak to even say a mumble
>it took me over a month to think thinks over and made up my mind to breakup
>I felt strong. I feel that i am invincible
>hey what else can hurt me after seeing what i saw and feel what i felt right?
>holding my head up high feels good man!
>she cries says shes sorry. (cue in Justin beieber's too late to say sorry song)(F*ck you justin shut the f*ckup)yes bitch its too late
>went separate ways
>she went on to have a boyfriend and eventually found a husband
>occational bootycalls with her. now im the 'other guy' of the relationship (still do it while her husband was away and her kid is watching but still too young to remember) coz i thought that time that she owes me that much and she agrees with it.
>bootycall gets less frequent as time passes
>then we went seperate ways
>not really coz we are on the same cirlce off friends
>still civilized and friendly towards her
>almost a year passed. i went out to date
>though im totaly over the hurt im still not ready for a serious relationship
>many girls come and go but will not include them in the story since they are not relevant
>call her 'Game'
>now college freshie. still in the prowl for college girls and still me not wanting serious relationship
>Game was the sh*t compared to the girls on my college easily 8/10 to 9/10
>great rack, witty,always the life of the class,
>always "game" to drinking till morning
>but a country girl, goes back home almost every weekend
>but has boyfriend, 3years going steady in fact
>inner barney in me says 'challenge accepted!"
>i dont know but for me it comes natural
>my philosopy then was it was easier to get a girl which is currently in a relationship since they are already tied down to their bfs
>the boyfriend stays at the country and visits Game at the college from time to time..they are in a long distance relationship i guess
>pfftt LDR dont work!
>started out the new semister crosshair locked on her
>started asking her out. ofcourse with her friends so i wont creep her out since we never talk then suddenly i just ask her out so i make it to a point that it will always be a group thing
>hanging out became almost daily routine
>after a week of innocent hanging out with her as 'just a friend'i started to make my move
>while sitting across her, i stare. i mean a fixed look direct in her eyes so long that i really meant for her to catch me looking.
>Then at the moment of eye contact i immidiately look away as if 'oh sh*t she caught me looking!' look
>then she smiles
>in case you dont know, its a good sign that if you are caught starring but the girl did not give a 'whatda f*ck you looking at!?' look and instead gave you a smile with a blushing face. Its Game on brotha!
>so i know i had Game hooked to me
>Noooo you cannot unlatch my charms and cute jokes!
>a month of flirting and few drink overs shes mine
>of course she still has her boyfriend
>its cool with me, i said im not the jelous type. im the 'other guy' again
>boosts my ego like sh*t
>thinking they are so happy with their relationship but why they end up hooking up with me?
>ill just gonna play you up bitches till i find another prospect and move on
>thats how i think, thats how i roll!
>im the 'other guy' feels good deymn!
>about 3 months into the relationship, Game is getting all serious
>saying she wanna leave her BF
>"pffft go ahead, since im still having fun with you do what you want ill just dump you when im bored" is what i said to myself
>one time Game and I where out (i dont remember the place) eating then she suddenly hands me over her phone.
>just answer she says. "okey"i said
>it was her boyfriend.
>i was dumbfounded why the hell she hands me over her phone knowing that she was talking to her BF?
>Then the guy asked
>"are you realy with Game now?"
>"are you realy her new BF?"
>"do you know that she has a BF?"
>i blurted out just one word to answer all his questions. it was a crisp YES
>then i hanged up
>gave her back the phone while giving her a confused smirk
>saw her eyes feeling sad a bit
>but immidately turned into a wide smilling eye
>'were legal now' she says
>i smiled back but thinking 'im not the other guy anymore'
>no biggie. will just continue to do my sh*t
>didnt really think about that im in a serious relationship now
>but i go around the college with her like a trophy since all the people close enough to us new that i snatched her from her bfs arms like stealing a candy from a baby
>proud about the bad thing i did
>still go around flirting with other girls
>but no sex. not even kiss
>just flirt text and calls
>Game knows about it. Knows how i roll
>Game didnt care much since she knew better not to get jelous
>or so i thought
>she lets me do it anyway
>second year in college i decided to work part time coz being a playa cost a lot
>notice that most of the money i earn was spent towards Game and going out with her
>no biggie i said.at least im still having fun
>one day i received a text from her early morning
>'happy 2nd anniv love!'
>im in a 2 year relationship with Game!??
>that was quick!did not see that coming!
>am i in a serious relationship now!??
>i sit up but still in my bed
>recalled all the things weve done
>i felt happy, i felt love
>she stayed even though i put her through lots of bullsh*ts
>She stayed even if i flirt with other girls
>maybe i like Game, maybe i like game a lot?
>maybe im in love with her without even noticing it?
>went straight to shower to git fresh before going to the college
>when i arrived i immidiately saw game
>she is more beautiful than i remembered
>shes walking towards me with arms wide open
>gave me a kiss on the lips
>her lips is softer than i remembered
>i love her
>i changed my ways, i no longer do flirting
>i dont look at other girls anymore
>we made to our 4th year aniv
>im so happy. i think shes the one
>but by that time i lost interest to continue college
>desided to dropout
>found a new full time job
>ask her to move in with me... she did
>unlimitted love making
>this can go on forever
>she still goes to college. i go to work
>im on a night shift schedule
>when i get home she is just about to leave
>barely got talking time
>so whenever theres an opportunity we f*ck
>at weekends we go out with my usual circle of friends
>friends since highschool
>considered them as my brothers and sisters
>since im mostly at work and Game gets bord at home she goes out with my friends
>no biggie. they are my brothers. i trust them i trust her
>things became 'regular'
>nothing special...but i loved her everyday
>almost nearing our 7th year aniv
>can you believe that? 7 years?
>ill cut to the chase
>found out she was f*cking my best bud
>damn it hurts.
>thought she was the one
>but didnt hurt as much as it did with Cool
>i guess my heart without me noticing created a barrier to protect me from future hurts like i felt before with cool
>it hurted for an hour
>but then i easily got over it
>as in easily got over it
>no crying no drunk nights no nothing
>i just focused on work
I'm not really bothering to read all your melodramatic garbage. If you have an issue that you want advice about, spit it out. If anyone really feels the need for more background to give advice, they'll ask for more detail.
>lets call her 'Main'
>petite, cute, loud, out going, easily 8/10
>she my team mate at work
>team is not that big round 30 people
>be with her everyday but just as a friend since she just got married
>knows what happend between me and Game
>feels sorry for me. no biggie i say
>the team always go out after shift almost everyday to drink two bottles of beer
>ofcourse we always go over 2 bottles and went home dawn then back to work at noon
>we are now on mid shift
>curious that i was i asked how come Main why is she always with us
>i mean does her husband know that she always go out with us drinking till morning
>she says its okey since her husband is on night shift and she will be waiting for him anyway before going home so might as well kill the time drinking
>her husband is working on the same company as us but different business
>cool i said
>so months passed this team drinking sessions continues
>Main and me gets close, close enough that teamates taks about us
>we shrug it off coz we are not anything but friends
>deep inside i like her already
>shes so smart, in fact smarter than me in everyway (Im mean this girl has skill when it comes to work, love and life) i know she will up the ladder
>so were close now
>she was lying to me
>not really lying but just being secretive
>turns out the reason she was always with us is that her husband has broken up with her 6 months into getting married
>turns out her husband is having an affair
>were so very close now
>we hooked up
>though theyre not yet divorced due to financial
>i thought to myself im 26, im not getting any younger. i need to get my sh*t together
>since whe both came from a recent breakup we should know better
>no more games
>things are pretty serious now
>i loved her she loved me
>i wont give her hurt the way i felt it before
>i wont do stupid things anymore
>shes my life
>a year later she found a better job
>thats good i said, since were talking bout our future together now
>i also found a better job which is near hers
>her job demanded that she go abroad 3 months for training
>we decided to step things a notch
>we decided that its realy time to get serious
>we decided that were gonna be a couple forever
>we decided to have a child
>she was abroad and we were doing skype when she broke the news
>i almost cried! im gonna be a dad!
>she havent said anything to anyone yet. She wants that ill be the one breaking the news to everyone back here
>Of course im gonna do it!
>Im so proud im gonna be a dad!
>this will be the first time i will be meeting her family
>i know this will be hard knowing that their daughter came from recently broken marriage
>but went i did
>i gave my speech
>'though your daughter and i are not together by any law or paper, i guarantee you guys that i will love her more than any paper or law prove'
>deym that was some good sh*t i though to myself
>they like me. they gave their blessing
>i was the happiest man on earth!
>she arrived after 3months
>were so happy were having a baby
>of course i asked her to move in with me
>months go by so fast
>i work hard even rendering OT just to save up for the big day
>we go out shopping for things that our baby will use
>4-5 months into our pregnancy we went for an ulta sound
>its healthy, the doctor says
>its a boy, the doctor says
>its a boy!??? i said
>iiiittttssss aaa bbooooooyyyy! yeeeaaaaahh!
>i always wanted a boy!
>we were so thrilled
>oh things i would teach to my son!
>can wait for him to grow up!
>im so excited
>i was waiting on our private room
>the phone rang
>it was a nurse calling
>'congrats mr.anon youre now dad'
>can i see them?
>'im sorry mr.anon but you can see them in the morning'
>can you atleast tell me if theyre safe?
>theyre fine just recovering now, btw we had to cut open your wife due to complications but no biggies they are safe
>i let out a long sigh***
>as long as they are safe im fine with that
>morning seems so far ahead i cant sleep
>i wanna see them!
>6am, im looking at the phone, thinking it will ring anytime
>7am, somehow im sending ultra magnetic pulses from my brain towards the phone to make it ring
>8am, still nothing
>9am, i felt something, something that tells me that the phone will ring in 5seconds,
>so i hovered my hand over the handset and what do you know it rang!
>it didnt even let out a full ring! half a ring is all it took for me to pick it up!
>'Mr.anon you can now go to the healing ward to see both of them'
>i ran as fast as i could not minding how i smell or look since i was up more than 48hours straight now
>i dont care i wanna see them
>i opened the big metal door and there they were
>my Gf lying on bed still have asleep due to drugs administered to her
>and a nurse holding the most adorable cutest thing i ever saw in my life!
>i held back my tears as i approach
>but still a little drop spilled over
>i have a family i said
>im happy im contented
>im on mid shift shes on night shift
>i sleep at the sleeping quarters provided to employees then ill wake up to pick her up so we go home together
>i occasionaly go out with my work buds for drinks
>no girls just pure bro time
>im so much happy with my life right now i dont see any other woman
>my only goal is to provide for my family
>whats is this im feeling? im feeling a bit weird
>i feel alone. i feel neglected
>our son is a year old now and somehow all the attention is now with him
>i mean ofcourse im not jelous about my GF giving more attention to our son over me but
>but i should be the first option right?
>im primary the son is secondary right?
>im not jelous, i just feel like im emotionally abandoned
>we talk less, we argue more
>things we never argue about before seems like so big deal now
>she doesnt see me as a partner but someone who will provide for them..thats how i see it honestly
>this goes on
>goes on in a downward spiral
>everyday we argue about little things
>i try to divert my attention just by working harder
>Lets call her 'Free'
>long hair, loud, friendly, nice rack, 7/10
>i was sitting outside a coffeshop outside our office building with my buds
>i smell something, something good
>like a freshly cut grass in the morning,
>like breeze brought by the cool ocean
>i turned aroun to see who it was
>i swear everything was in slow motion
>i saw a long hair being blown sideways by the soft air waiving as if calling me to come over and have a better sniff
>i saw a fair redish cheek shinning from the sun rays
>i saw a neck so smooth that i believed it was silk
>i saw a broad shoulder that seems like a comfortable place to lay your head on
>I saw an arm that glows
>i saw a hand
>a hand that is holding somebody elses hand
>she is holding a guys hand
>then i saw her face and she saw me
>she was familiar
>she was my work mate
>my work mate with her boyfriend holding hands while dropping her off to work
>i shooked that feeling off
>we also went in as our shift would now start
>im not gonna hurt my GF, im through with that life
>im a family man now
>i would never hurt them
>still conditions at home seems to get worse
>back at work i was tasked to be a point of contact for our mini team
>little did i know that Free was also tasked to do the same for her mini team
>so much win!
>but still im not gonna hurt my GF, im through with that life
>im a family man now
>i would never hurt them
>the given tasked required us to talked to each other
>it was a good 6 months since the day i first saw her
>but youll find her stand up amongst the rest of the females at the office
>its that kinda office that not so many females are of 'good quality' looks wise
>we started chatting
>just clean chat bout work
>we have a builtin chatroom in our computers that we can use like messenger
>then the occasional 'wassup?' started
>i was shocked it actualy came from her first
>of course im a good man i would never ever again do bad things
>then occasional became frequent then became a norm then a habit then an addiction
>the day isnt complete without us chatting
>but we never let our office mates know that we are talking to each other
>everybody at the office knows im a family man
>i dont want to put her in a position that people will talk behind her back saying that she is having an affair with a guy that has a family
>ofcourse were not having an affair we are just chatting
>we never talk outside of the chatroom
>so we continue our clean harmless chats
>we talked about anything and everything
>she plays online games!
>i play DotA she plays LOL!
>how cool is that!?
>she plays vids! she says shes good at Just dance!
>i wanna see her moves i said
>she says sure!
>shes in to anime, im in to anime
>list of animes we watched and read goes on and on
>ofcourse we were just chatting. no physical activies involved. we both know that
>we are staying above our heads
>were just chatting
>but i know i really wanna see her bust a move
>back at home again
>it very heavy being back here
>my son greets me and my tired body instanly refreshed
>i can play with him before we go to sleep
>Gf gives me that look
>whaaat? i said
>she started a fight for a reason that i dont even remember
>we continue fighting without even remembering what the fight is about
>thats how bad it was
>at this point i realized the things we do
>i work, she works, for our family
>theres no 'we' anymore
>i think about it
>we have nothing in common
>I play online games, she dont
>Im in to animes, shes hates them
>i play console, she dont
>she havent watched starwars! any of them!
>i started to think that me and Main were just rebounds to eachother
>i started to think that we went to fast
>I started comparing them
>i know it was wrong, it was a stupid thing to do but my brain did it anyway
>at the office
>i told everything to Free
>we are an open book to each other, no secrets at this point
>she consoles me, she comforts me
>she says to fix it with Main. which i did. but i know were just staying together becoz of the son which sucks
>still i work things out with Main coz i beleive in the concept of family
>i dont want to have a broken family
>but know im feeling weird. im starting to feel something that i should not feel
>im a family man now
>i would never hurt them
>but i feel it slowly creeping on me
>im starting to have feeling towards Free
>or maybe im just mad or i feel lack of love from Main or emotionaly torned i dont know
>then i realized that at this point its too late to question my rationality
>i have feeling towards Free...Sh*t
>im into deep
>im not thinking straight anymore at this point
>f*ck it!im gonna tell Free how i feel
>at the office again
>for some reason today will be the last day that our team will have the chatroom and it will no longer be available for us to use ever
>just in time to give my last message to her
>i will tell her how i feel and thats it
>i dont care what the outcome will be
>last 5 mins before our shift ends
>i sent a chat
>i told her that im falling for her, i didnt realize it at first but i was falling for her fast
>that i dont want to drag her down into my life coz a have a son and a GF
>ill understand if shell never talk to me again
>then i immediately shutdown my computer then went straight out the office to smoke and breathe
>we dont have the chatroom anymore at the office, at this point we have already exchanged phone numbers
>i have a spare phone which i used just for Free and kept it a secret to everyone
>we constantly text each other at night before going to sleep
>she goes home i stay at the office to wait for Main
>though at this point i know Free wont text me anymore because of the message i sent her about how i feel
>usually we text until 1am
>its 2am now still no text
>i figured that she is mad at me, how could i betrayed her trust
>we knew from the start that we should be above our heads the whole time
>we are just friends
>'hey anon, i hope i did not wake you up'
>'i just wanted to say that it was sweet that you feel that way'
>'i always thought that you like me thats why you spend so much time chatting with me and texting me but a dont want to assume until i hear it seriously from you'
>'im happy to know that you feel that way, im stopping my self to feel that way too'
>i know the situation you are in. Dont worry you did not drag me into anything and i promise i wont let myself be dragged by you into something i know i will regret'
>'lets continue to be friends, no harm done'
>i dont know how to feel
>guess we still cool
>at the office
>see her coming to my direction
>she says hi
>its the first time we talked outside the chatroom
>so much win!
>does this mean that she good to be still friends? or more than that?
>i dont know but just feels good men
>since we dont have chat anymore we resorted to emails
>this maybe a bad move by us since emails are monitored by the IT but we didnt care
>started to say i miss you to each other
>starting to feel like teenagers again got butterflies in my stomach
>i had an idea
>since ill just be sleeping here at the office why not ask her if i could take her home
>'i dont know anon, people might start talking'
>i was turned down
>'but we can ask my friend to go with us since her house is on the way to my house so it wont be suspicious?'
>mfw she said that
>i said sure!
>so that was the plan
>so she and her friend met me at the parking lot
>ofcourse i motioned her to sit at the passenger seat and her friend at the back which she smiled an noded
>before i got in the car i roared a victory roar inside my head
>i also thought that i was hurting Main even though she doesnt know
>i promised i wont do this to her
>i promised im not that type of guy anymore
>I promised im a family man now
>I promi....turn the keys..start the engine..off we go
>silence was deafening
>i swear i heard crickets making it more akward
>i talked about work. that started up the conversation
>we were laughing the three of us
>we were sharing things we hate at work
>its here freinds stop now
>we said our goodbyes and take care to her
>we are now alone
>what to do? what to say? i dont know
>just started talking again bout anything
>i realized that she has the sweetest voice
>didnt realize it was her stop
>she insisted that i just drop her off her street
>i said okey
>she said thank you a till next time
>no handshake no kiss not even on the cheeks
>im still smilling half way to home
>i texted her when i got home as said goodnight
>i also texted Main saying i went home for some reason and ill just be piking her up when her shift ends
>im so smooth
>i kept saying to myself that im not cheating of Main with Free since i just droped her off on my way home
>of course i kept it a secret but since there is no physical contact that doesnt count as cheating
>me and Free got more close
>i drive her home a lot but not always coz we dont want suspicions to arise at the office
>still with her friend when i do
>i beleive we are more close now
>so this time when i drop her off her street i leaned in towards her and presented my cheeks with my eyes half closed
>i felt her warm cheek touched mine
>i felt my cheek go warm
>we are now on cheek to cheek basis
>so much win!
>i got home i texted her and thanked her for the cheek to cheek action
>she giggled through text and says it was a sweet gesture and she liked it
>i joked that nextime it should be a real kiss
>she jokingly replied sure with a smiley
>we bid goodnights and a kiss emoji
>i was smiling
>before i go to sleep i was thinking
>im now cheating on Main
>Im now doing cheek to cheek action with another girl
>im now not a family man
>im now a....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!
>at the office
>Free tells me shes going out of town with office friends. She will be gone almost a week
>she asked me if i want to go with them
>i said yes but i cant coz she knows my situation
>I said cool. i said ill miss her. she said shell miss me too
>we talked and found out that the flight is too early, she has to be at the airport 4am.
>I offered to pick her up and drive her at the airport
>'im not sure anon, guess my mom will drop me off at the airport but ill keep you posted'
>i said sure no biggie
>night before the flight shee texted my and said her mom wont be able to take her so i immidately offered to take her to the airport
>it would probably take an hour or so from her place to the airport so around 2:45am i was their street
>i saw two people approaching
>she was the other one
>maybe 50meters before they got to the car they stopped and the other person handed the lauggage to Free and free proceeded alone
>i asked who was the other person since i dont have my glasses with me
>she said it was her mom
>oh sh*t it was your mo1? why didnt you tell me? i could have greeted her or even waived goodbye and say that ill get you to the airport safe
>no worries she says. I let it go. maybe its not the time for the 'meet the mom'.
>there is no traffic so we got to the airport quickly
>she was texing with her office friends and they say that they were already at the airport
>they should not see us we both said
>i told her ill pass the drop off aread then she can go down there
>it was now to get off the car
>she looked at me and said thank you. I said it was fine i really wanted to drop her off
>still looking at me
>as if waiting for something
>then i felt something behind my back pushing my face towards hers
>there was nothing pushing me
>i guess thats just my imagination
>were now face to face
>i leaned closer
>lips closer to hers
>i remembered the movie 'Hitch'
>I go in 90% then ill wait for her to go the other 10%
>i waited so long
>it seems like this is taking forever
>it seems like im not gonna get a kiss
>it seems like im a total idiot expecting a kiss from her
>it seems li.....*smack*
>she kissed me
>she kissed me!wooooooo!
>sorry for the long thread
>sorry seems like im autistic
>just feels so low i need some way to vent out
>about to end shift now,
>almost end promise
>will update once i get back to work later
can't believe i have just wasted my time reading this.
op, stop cheating on your gf and grow up. you have responsibilities. you have a fucking kid for gods sake. this is going to ruin your relationship unless you end it now before it gets too serious. you need to go to counselling sessions with your gf. You have invested too much time and effort into your relationship to throw it away for a girl you are infatuated with. its not worth it and you know it isn't.