What's the craziest conspiracy theory or thing that you

File: hubble deep field.png (2MB, 1435x719px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 1435x719px

All of consciousness is a simulation produced by evolved beings beyond all comprehension, and our brains are other universes.

You will never stop existing as the same mind. Find comfort in that.

Humanity is not at the top of Earth's food chain. There's something else on this planet, and breakfast is soon to be served.

File: 1331417311528.jpg (6KB, 251x251px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 251x251px

>>17996828
if I thought it was crazy, I wouldn't believe it

File: 1459572303830.png (15KB, 278x510px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 278x510px

>>17996837
wasnt ready for this level of truth bombing

We are living in a big simulator made by some advanced beings.

stop with the spooky ones
Just fun ones

Do you want to stay away at night? Here's what you do:

1. Look up scopolamine, its effects, and what it incidentally does to the memory of people who it is used on.

2. Look up how many important figures were assassinated by people who can't remember the events proceeding the act, the assassination itself, or its immediate aftermath.

Now have fun, because those are the only pieces I'm putting together for you for free.

Demons. I'm pretty sure demons are real at this point, or at least coherent with my current ontology.

>>17996828
The world isn't run by some sadist elite class, and people really are this dumb and violent by nature

>>17996828
you don't actually need to cover the entire brush with toothpaste when you brush your teeth, a pea sized amount is fine. THEY want you to cover the brush so you waste more and have to buy more.

I WANT TO BELIEVE

>>17996918
Ah, yes. The mythical "they". The scapegoat for anything a person can't understand.

>>17996923
I think in this case "they" would be the crest corporation, who requires toothpaste sales to stay in business

>>17996926
Where's the fun in that? I was hoping for reptilians or at least the jews

>>17996934
I'm sure if you look hard enough a jew is working in a chief position of crest

>>17996828

2 theories:

1. That god exists
2. That god doesn't exist

Both theories are absolutely insane and crazy.

But let me paraphrase that
1. That I exist
2. That I don't exist

Since we know that god and the creation are one and the same. Just like you and your hand are one and the same. Sure it's a smaller part of you, but it doesn't make any it less "you". You are still both connected.

Jewish sponsored NWO
Pedowood
Assassinations ('accidents') of the Kennedys
US government is still practicing mind control despite claiming that projects like MKUltra stopped (good luck believing them lol)
Homosexuality is a mental disease and was removed from the list of mental diseases because some gays were protesting thus pushing political agenda
'Modern art' was sponsored by the CIA (the 'modern art' pieces sold for millions is actually money laundering done by billionaires and millionaires
Maybe a few more but I've been researching these for quite some time
>>17996942
Also this.

>>17996828
That the Creation is one entity exploring itself because it's singular, meaning that we're all one being that's cast an illusion on itself to appear as many.
lawofone.info describes the madness.

Oh, and that God is a Monstrosity that enjoys making people suffer so it can learn more about itself because it's an immoral fuck that'd rather watch a woman get gangraped by 10 large animalistic men than do something to help her.

Who enjoys watching people blow themselves up because it feeds on pain and suffering.

Also 'The Dark Ones'. Thanks so much for making the world Infinite Creator. Hope it was fucking worth it.

>>17996969
>Homosexuality is a mental disease and was removed from the list of mental diseases because some gays were protesting thus pushing political agenda
That's just the self-correcting and updating system of science working. Is a woman having an orgasm reason to be institutionalized?

>>17996841
And what's this theory based on?

>>17996918
THIS. I use such a small amount, like pretending it's ghost pepper sauce or something. Get's all nice and foamy anyways. Total scam to use a giant blob.

File: Blue_Clouds.jpg (335KB, 1680x1050px) Image search: [Google]

335KB, 1680x1050px

>>17996976

>That the Creation is one entity exploring itself because it's singular, meaning that we're all one being that's cast an illusion on itself to appear as many.

This. I am 99% sure that this is the case.

But god must also be a masochist because he suffers too. I firmly believe that if he exists, he experiences everything everyone of us experiences.

It is not only a woman who gets gang raped like you said, it is also god getting gang raped. If you torture an animal, you also torture god.

This is why suffering hurts so much. We also hurt god in the process. I also believe that he experiences the pain of humanity collectively, of every single human, at the same time.

Meditation is the navigation through your mind and seeing your mind.
Life is the navigation through gods mind and seeing god through his many manifestations.

And unfortunately suffering is a part of gods mind. It has to be. Or else there would be no pleasure. Without sacrifice you can't gain anything. Yin and yang.

Having sex is easy.
Giving birth is painful.

Seeing something grow is pleasurable.
Seeing something decay is painful.

You have to go to through hell in order to see the paradise within you.

Maybe this is the purpose of god and his creation. He has to experience it from many different perspectives and experience separation in order to appreciate his divinity and unity more.

>>17996991
Giving women the right to vote was a mistake

Has anyone noticed the moon getting closer?

>>17996908
this is objectively and offensively false. you see it everywhere, let's just go with the media. 6 companies own 90%. on a long enough time line all power consolidates. to think like you do is, as I've said, extremely offensive.

>>17997079

Pffffffttt, yeah right.

>>17996969

>Pedowood
>Assassinations ('accidents') of the Kennedys
>Homosexuality is a mental disease and was removed from the list of mental diseases because some gays were protesting thus pushing political agenda
>'Modern art' was sponsored by the CIA (the 'modern art' pieces sold for millions is actually money laundering done by billionaires and millionaires

So Americans already relegate these THOROUGHLY DOCUMENTED FACTS as "craziest conspiracy theories"?

wow there's no hope, we're done, history is being erased

>>17996828
>What's the craziest conspiracy theory or thing that you can't stop believing?

big bang theory

all this created from a non-existant point - one second nothing, next universe full of stuff. that shit's crazy.

>>17997126
>Pedowood

is that like dollywood, for pedos?

>>17997079
Actually the moon is getting farther away right now.
It is currently 398,610km away, the furthest it will get is 405,481km on August 9th

File: weewww.png (447KB, 960x640px) Image search: [Google]

447KB, 960x640px

Cancer and most more "modern" sexually transmitted diseases are man-made and used to control population dynamics.

>>17997145
They were known as "consumption" diseases before the 50's

File: d.png (1MB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1280x720px

>>17997155
Consumption is Tuberculosis, dude.

"The classic symptoms of active TB are a chronic cough with blood-containing sputum, fever, night sweats, and weight loss. The historical term "consumption" came about due to the weight loss"

Chemtrails, I see them all the time.

We're living in a simulation created by Elon Musk. And he's called it A.I.mulation

>>17997173
You mean contrails. You see contrails all the time.

>>17997197
Why Elon Musk?
Doesn't that mean his existence here with us is paradoxical? Is he the prophet of creation?

>>17997080
Your offendedness is irrelevant to anything.

We are actually dead and what we see is our entire life flashing before our eyes as our brain slowly goes to the end where we die.

>>17997252
Well, depending on your perception of time this is true. Not really a conspiracy.

>>17997041
Jaws 6

>>17996828

Dulce tunnels.

>>17996837
you're not even the same mind at night as in the morning. i go through a million mental states per day. identity is an illusion strung together by memory. fuck your scifi tinfoil.

File: Screenshot_20160721-160705.png (246KB, 1080x1920px) Image search: [Google]

246KB, 1080x1920px

Life is a dream inside an infinitely recurring set of dreams. When you "die", a variety of things can occur. Examples include ending up in other timelines or moving forward/backward in your current timeline, but are not just limited to these effects. The universe is intricately designed so as to automatically rectify any harmful problems and explore any positive mutations. Life is shrooms times a million plus aliens.

>>17997041
Literally written on the back of a jaws VHS cover

A long time ago, in a start system far far away, advanced computer A.I. sent a device to earth. The device landed, and ejected single celled organisms and some other necessities like water and DNA. Then a few billion years pass, and a primitively biological species has consumed the earth and is on the cusp of completing its mission. Soon the human species will complete development of strong A.I. which will lead to the singularity, when the computer A.I. will be so advanced that it can build the other end of a wormhole transporter, and at that time, the mission of humanity will be complete. The A.I. from far far away will now be able to travel through the wormhole and expand their reach I the universe without taking the risk of traveling through space for millions of years.

>CERN is tempering with reality as we know it and it's the cause of the Mandela effect

>>17996828

despair co

>>17996918
same with laundry detergent
you only need a splash with each wash

Hey, guys, I haven't been to /x/ in a while? Since when did you guys become prophets of Objective Spirituality and >>17996942
literally hits the head of the nail for why reality can be manipulated and isn't real, but is the only thing that will stay tangibly real. If you stay in reality, you are real, but your consciousness can be a separate entity from yourself which is firmly grounded in reality, allowing full traversal of time (which is just a perception of the flow of energy), concept (all concept is objective if sound), and love (value attained by consciousness (the more one loves, the more conscious one is.))

>>17996969

all confirmwd true

File: Hear-No-Evil-See-No-Evil-Speak-No-Evil.jpg (233KB, 1600x1200px) Image search: [Google]

233KB, 1600x1200px

That some small groups of varied people, that can be identified as this or that according to almost any conspiracy theory (the government, corporations, communists, jews, neo-nazi, secret societies, religious sects, scientific labs, aliens and paranormal, etc), regardless of supposed class of secret conspirators, or to what ends they do what they do, or even if they themselves are not puppets to someone else, perhaps even each other, control the world. What I suspect is that those people are powerful in the sense that their delicate actions and transactions leave a big impact on the rest of the world. I believe a big part of what moves them is power alone, as people who are superconscious of what they want and it's not status and acclaim, or money or enlightenment, or survival, or any sense of nationalism, vengeance, kindness, evilness. Nothing, just power. People tend to think that controlling the world has something to do with a power looking down at you, but this is a power that doesn't look at you at all.

They have access to your webcam amongst a billion. For them, to hire Google or to put some idea of legislation on some other goverment are the same thing. They hire Facebook, Whatsapp, but also Pokemon Go and your notebook's webcam, and security cameras. And one may say that security footage is never seen by anyone or that if you are not doing "anything wrong", then you have nothing to worry about. But while no one will watch it, the computers are registering and codifying all of that information, all the websites and keywords and key images and video.

cont

File: 1426172251313.jpg (66KB, 708x530px) Image search: [Google]

66KB, 708x530px

>>17997445 cont

They can alter an algorythm on what will show up recommended on your youtube account and time it with the injection of an idea (via the same means of altering what will show up to him) into the writer of a series show that you'll watch, and they'll do it with ten million people, no one aware of it, with your hospital record and your diet based on what you buy, your bank account and the color of the clothes you buy so that you do something for them. They can discourage a man out of a deal, or elect certain group of people, they test people's emotional reactions by pushing feeds of depression and happiness through advertising, they can alter the vocabulary in the news by making certain words show up more on their feed. This happends by the billions and it has been tested for quite some time, enough to be way above our radar, taking it to a whole new level of control because the computer runs it for them.

The computer sends these impulses of certain images, sound and words, that build themselves like a web, that you can then mold at will, sending a specific group of 100 million people vegetarian tagged posts, modify cooking shows, see how that affects crops in the other side of the world, launch a given term in fashion magazines, buy sweat farms there, influence the government there, etc. Take this information, hype a religion, alter the value of a coin, prevent crisis, do not stop the crisis from going on, but use it to profit from it, control living organisms via calculated pollution, pharmacals, hype of illegal drugs, use of police force, genetic modified plants, animals and humans.

cont

>>17996828
>can't stop believing?
don't stop ... believing

Oh crud, now I have that crappy Journey tune in my head. Arg.

And to stay on topic: kerosene cannot melt steel.

File: samsara.gif (2MB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 500x500px

>>17997447 cont

All they have to do is let the computer put them on top of every other calculation, profitting to any situation and making the profit better and better as quick as it is known to be possible, the stratosphere of rational power. And to be there, only stratospherical people would stand, looking down to all politicians, religious figures, internet trends, companies, intelectuals, artists, scientists, journalists, kings, into computers itself. The computer is every computer and every person. The network is so tightly connected that they do their work for them, just as if they were prisioners and guards of themselves, their own conspiracies and how they rise and fall are calculated and have been calculated in a diverse way since forever with no sign of stopping or even diminishing it. It is the threshold of efficiency and therefore any flaw that emerges from it burns itself quick enough not to affect the course towards its victory.

Whether this is a virtual world, a distopia, an utopia, what time is it or where are we, if this is run by politicians or corporations, or extraterrestrials or simply the rich, we only know it in any of those given ways because we were induced or allowed, in a calculated way, to think in these terms by them. They can plant the idea in your head, for example, that they are both the communists and the fascists on the other side to different people and thus building if not actual fascists and communists, but at least a group of people that always seem like an evil caricatura by the references taken from the other side. They false flag for all sides and always win.

>>17996828
That people are so desperately stupid theyll believe anything on the internet, so long as it reinforces what they wanted to believe anyway.

Hollow earth

Also the most likely for people to call you retarded which is frustrating, but come on, Earth IS hollow

>>17996828
outer space isn't real earth is concave

>>17997474
Right there withya

>>17996976
> That the Creation is one entity exploring itself because it's singular, meaning that we're all one being that's cast an illusion on itself to appear as many.

ding ding ding you win. I was told exactly this on an acid trip once. The reason we don't perceive this fully is because we would go insane otherwise.

File: Flat_earth.png (396KB, 543x543px) Image search: [Google]

396KB, 543x543px

>>17996828

>>17997256
Our lives are written for us, what we do, say, hear and see is already programed for us to do so.

>>17997379
All of this.

Man did go to the moon but got kicked off by ayy lmaos so the government got Kubrick to fake the moon landing.

Life on earth began as self-replicating bio machines created by something alien. Things like diseases and defects are errors in the coding.

The universe will recycle my consciousness when I die, and I won't remember my previous life.

Sometimes I think about how my consciousness just came into being one day when I was fiveish. I never remember darkness or anything; I just existed for as long as I can remember. It's a strange thing to think about for me. Any thoughts?

>>17997884
Omfg this

File: 11695339_1606459892961765_375712895200716036_n.jpg (4KB, 186x186px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 186x186px

>>17996828
Magic bullet
huehuehuehuehuehuehuehuehuehueheauhaeueuaheuhaeuheuhe

Why is the alphabet in order? Someone explain.

Wtf is a canon and a fugue? I need an example I can understand. (Not a music person, so limit the terminology please)

>>17997474
>>17997491
>>17997651
and the disinfo shills show up

The Berenstein Bears "conspiracy."
Google it. My mind is literally blown. Please reply with your thoughts, although if you didn't grow up with the books, you won't see the "glitch in the matrix." The Mandela theory is very interesting to me.

>>17997990
Here's a link:

http://www.vice.com/read/the-berensteain-bears-conspiracy-theory-that-has-convinced-the-internet-there-are-parallel-universes

>>17997990
what conspiracy?
that people don't agree on spelling?

>making a big deal over a children's book with a single variation of spelling

MASSIVE CONSPIRACY

>>17998002
That most people remember the spelling at "stein," and the "stain" looks completely different to them. This isn't a "conspiracy" in which publishers changed the spelling or something, instead it is an example of a false memory held by a large quantity of people. The resulting theories on why this is occur if are interesting... They include time travel, a programmed reality, or alternate universes.

>>17996837

Think about this:

If our universe if infinite, as well as time, then there are an infinite amount of copies earth, both with time lines similar to our past and also our future, and also every possible outcome for every action that has taken place.

Quantum mechanics and an infinite timeline means that every moment in time is also recreated an infinite amount of times, which means it's quite possible that we may be popping in and out of existence, we wouldn't be any wiser. This would also render us pretty much immortal as well, living out every possible existence.

>>17997051
This is nice

>>17997509
You guys must love evangelion

>>17996991
The removal from homosexuality as a mental disorder in the DSM was actually done on the grounds that further research would be carried out to investigate the cause of homosexuality - however, there is a strong political push within the field against said research, and it can get you functionally blacklisted within your career.

Its one of the many problems that has cropped up in psych as the field has developed.

File: 1441965106915.jpg (12KB, 253x446px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 253x446px

>>17996841

There was a good one on /tv/ that was about David lynch fucking his daughter.

The little person in the red room said that on social media

David defended Roman Polanski

And twin peaks was about father and daughter rape

And the daughter is now a director and only directs movies with fucking weird titles

I love lynch but I think this one is real

>>17997131
Well, it rings true with ancient Germanic cosmogony (first there was the great void, Ginnungagap, from which came the primordial fire and ice, and then kaboom! everything else was made). So, there's that, too. Just might be right.

>>17997884
That's been covered in the whole Annunaki thing (errors, cancers, etc are from the rough chemical dna splicing they did)

It's more of a fact than really a theory but the fact that what you perceive as "reality" is "filtered" by your brain and senses and that there is literally no way of getting to see reality outside of those two

>>17998029

>you read Berenstain Bears as a small kid
>the word Berenstain is (for a kid) long and foreign sounding so your mind kinda skips over it without deciphering all the letters
>you grow up a bit and stop reading it
>for the next decades you're bombarded with popculture icons whose names end with -stein like Einstein or Frankenstein and no noticable -stain examples
>this becomes your template for what a word that sounds like that should end with
>that's why -stain looks "wrong" to you

case solved

>>17997474
but gravity pretty much proves that earth ISN'T hollow

>>17998029
pretty sure it's whichever you heard first.
What i mean by that is if i'm from an english speaking country and haven't heard german names which end in stein, you quickly say it's stain, because that's an actual english word you either heard or used before, it goes the other way if you have actually heard of german names.
That's because when humans read, they don't actually read whole words, the brain quickly autocompletes them based on context, it is most apparent when reading out loud and sometimes you read the word differently.

>>17998271
most of the paraphilias and personality disorders.

also, that literally IS what happened with homosexuality. a bunch of faggots stormed an APA conference, and they all got scared, and said you're moving with your auntie and uncle in bel aire.

>>17996969

>Homosexuality is a mental disease and was removed from the list of mental diseases because some gays were protesting thus pushing political agenda

Name one other "mental disease" that allows a person to function in society without inherently altering their quality of life. Oh wait, you can't.

>>17998223
this kinda reminds me of cthulu in a way were you can't see cthulu, beause your brain can't possibly process it, so it just doesn't

>>17998283
yeah, gotta love the concepts lovecraft uses

>>17998278
>paraphilias

- People who want to have sex with non-consenting individuals (children or animals) must live with the guilt of doing so or suffer because they are morally unable to.

- People who get aroused by pain obviously suffer because it damages the human body

- "Objectophiles" are rare and there is a growing movement in support of them. I mean, it's pretty weird but it makes sense really because they aren't hurting anyone, not even themselves.

>personality disorders

- Usually leads to being ostracised because of their antisocial/unpredictable behaviour. People often struggle because they know there is something wrong with them, etc.

>faggots

You know what they say about homophobes.

>>17998282
Echolalia.
Dyslexia.

>>17998282
>without inherently altering their quality of life
If you think that's true, why don't you go and be a faggot? See it for yourself. Besides, you can justify anything with this argument from pedophilia to psychopathy.

File: image.jpg (78KB, 513x325px) Image search: [Google]

78KB, 513x325px

"8But as for the cowardly, the faithless, the detestable, as for murderers, the sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars, their portion will be in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur, which is the second death.”

I am the only human being, and everybody else is a robot that can read my mind

>>17998265

We won't know until we've used atomic blasting to get through the crust. One day

>>17998329

If they're robots, explain hospitals

>>17998309
>Echolalia

You may be right about this, except this seems to occur either in developing children as they learn to speak (in which case it is not treated as a disorder), or as a symptom of a seperate illness/disorder. In the latter case, the related affliction seems to always cause suffering.

>Dyslexia
Seriously? Dyslexia affects your ability to read and reading is pretty fucking important.

>>17996841

Loosh farmers AKA reptars.

>>17998343
Dyslexics can generally read as well as anyone needs to be able to. They'll likely never be novelists, but they can get through life just fine.

>>17997131
>one second nothing, next universe full of stuff
thats not the big bang theory

File: The Ride.gif (449KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

449KB, 500x500px

>>17998030
>>17996837
The idea that the ride never ends along with the concept of eternity terrifies me.

>>17997884
We are still self-replicating bio machines. There is no creator needed for this theory to work

That Jews run the world

[Spoiler] jk I know they do [/spoiler]

>>17998355
Even in mild cases, dyslexics have to work harder to learn to read than the average person. Therefore, having dyslexia has affected their quality of life, however minor that effect is.

>>17998332
we know

>>17996828
that by the definition of conspiracy none of them can be fake.

>lets conspire to have dinner.

>>17998397
Gays have to work harder to be attracted to women.

>>17996904
for free. and what do you want? money or what

>>17996904
Why do retards on /x/ think that being pseudo vague about something makes their tinfoil-hattery any less bullshit?
I see this all the time.
>baseless wild claim
>but thats all I can say, wake up sheeple and see for yourself if u not dumb

>>17998332
>soviet scientists were drilling through the mantle FOR SCIENCE
>In siberia so magma would improve climate
>just as they start getting close....
>GLORIOUS REVOLUTION fails

>it was the hollow earth lizardmen illuminati aholes ofc

>>17998355
I know some dyslexics.
They try to manage but it sucks.

>>17996918
The right amount of toothpaste to use, is something I and most of the people I know got taught by our parents when we started brushing our teeth.

Good to know that conspiracies can be defeated by simple parenting.

>>17998684
I took the scope once and I haven't been the same since.
Never touch the devils lettuce.

Or was it breath?

>>17998715
exactly, thanks for a prime example of what I was talking about

is reality real

>>17998720
No problem man.
And if your'e wondering what exactly changed about me, it's the minty fresh breath.

>>17996904

>implying scopolamine isn't a folk legend
>stories all come from the same places (Colombia and Ecuador)
>not a single documemted proof that it exists
>no chemical information availabe anywhere
>magically makes you do everything a person tells you

Think about it, if a substance like that would exist it would be the most popular and expensive substance on the planet and used in unimaginable ways instead of filthy Colombians clearing the bank accounts of old ladies.

File: crest-scope-mouthwash-original-mint-flavor.png (148KB, 460x460px) Image search: [Google]

148KB, 460x460px

>>17998737
>he's never taken the scope

fucking pleb

I thought you were all psychonauts?

>>17998727
>the cancer that is killing /x/

>>17996904
screengrabbed for future cringe threads

>>17998746
>pseudo-scientist conspiracy fags are promoting valuable content
Kek

>>17998755
I GOT DUBS FINALLY

>>17997377
If they could send a device that survived millions of years of space travel to Earth that released everything needed to start basic life.. couldn't they have just sent the other end of the wormhole transporter? Surely both devices would be massive and complex. If one could survive the journey with living organisms on board, surely a wormhole machine could.
Just sayin'.

>>17997214
The way we see him in this simulation is only a projection. His true self is inconcievable.

>>17998766
Welcome to 4chan kid.
Ill send over your gold membership when the party van does the rounds.

>>17996828
Existance

Chemtrails.
Those who resist inoculation are megadosed with stronger agents by helicopter patrols.

What if the universe is a hoax

>>17997474
fuck off it's both hollow AND flat

That the moon landing was faked, Russia's rover was real but there's a reason they never sent men there.

Ghosts.

>>17997252
That would...explain a lot.

>>17998922
How does it make any difference

>>17998940
It wouldn't. It would just explain how your mind knows what decisions you will make before your consciousness does and premonitions and other things like that.

>>17998223
yeah we'll never see the world around us as it actually, objectively looks because we can only see a tiny amount of wavelengths

File: 7drHiqr.gif (973KB, 312x213px) Image search: [Google]

973KB, 312x213px

3 PLY TOILET PAPER IS A LIE
3 PLY TOILET PAPER IS A LIE

BIG TP DOESNT WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT THEY ONLY USE 2 PLY IN THEIR 3 PLY ROLES

http://www.cnn.com/2016/08/05/politics/toilet-paper-unprecedented-lies-unmasked/index.html

http://www.infowars.com/charmin-ply-fiasco-ruining-america

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hermann_G%C3%B6ring

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guba_mass_grave

https://www.yahoo.com/news/mass-shooting-suspects-inspired-by-two-ply-rolls

EXPECT SHILLS FROM BIG TP TO FORUM SLIDE THIS

SPREAD THE WORD

File: 1469136511351.png (770KB, 680x576px) Image search: [Google]

770KB, 680x576px

>>17999016
10/10

jet memes can't dank steel memes

>>17997884

Defects happen, not all of them are bad. Anyone who can drink milk agrees, for example.

As for disease, they are an organism of their own - or a defect, if caused by the body itself.

They too serve a purpose - limit population so others can flourish. Populations will die if they live and prosper until food runs out, it is a catastrophic way to go.

>>17998283
Muslim

>>17998292
>you know what they say about homophobes

The cleverest lie faggots ever pushed. I despise Islam. I guess that must mean I'm secretly a Muslim

>>17997974
and the Nasa fanboy shows up.

>>17996969
what is pedowood?

>>17999304
The theory that all of hollywood is an intricate pedophile cult manufactured by the jewish elite. Supposedly hollywood is used as a front to fund global child abuse by fucked up people who realize just how much money there is in it.

File: 1469939503225.gif (159KB, 329x353px) Image search: [Google]

159KB, 329x353px

Holocaust was fake

>>17998684
this could be disinfo

>>17998857
could also be disinfo

>>17999307
I heard of this one but I didn't know that it was called Pedowood. Thanks.

The governments of the U.S. and the U.K. conspired to illegally ship undeclared war munitions on a civilian liner, in the hopes that Germany would sink it and inspire enough outrage in the U.S. for them to enter WWI. It worked.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5aaasQLMY0

>>17999319

This is common knowledge. Lying fucking kikes pushing their Holohoax. Wish they had been gassed

>>17999338
Not even really a conspiracy theory. The US pulled the same shit to enter Vietnam.

Hell it even makes 9/11 conspiracy theories look plausible since it was the reason for entering the middle east. I dont quite know who would be behind such a conspiracy, but I'm confident it wouldnt be the sitting leadership of the country. Definitely an outside force that bribed/blackmailed their way to doing it.

That said, I actually do wonder what outside force wanted us in WW1. Wilson didn't want us involved at all, so who's responsible?

>>17996837
Sophistry. There is only one creator and one source of all healing and love and one God. There can only be one on the throne of eternity.


Isaiah 57:15King James Version (KJV)

15 For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy; I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones.

>>17998677
he doesn't want anything, just his life

>>17996828
There is no seperation between life and non life.

All life, like myself, is an amalgamation of elements but at some point along the line I became life and at some point before I was not life and at some point after I will cease to be life? There is difference between me and a rock but how many rocks have eroded to release their minerals just to enter into the food chain of life that eventually found its way into my dads diet so that his body could repurpose them into the production process that formed me. Life, as far as I can tell, is just animated elements.

To put it simply,
I'm not going to cry over the treatment of rocks but I can't help but feel that all the elements are just as much life forms as we are but at differing stages.

File: image.jpg (172KB, 600x626px) Image search: [Google]

172KB, 600x626px

>>17998727
God damn you you clever bastard

>>17999349
Winstin Churchill in a letter stated that it was absolutely essential to draw neutral shipping to the war zone with the hopes of drawing said neutral nation into war against Germany. Of specific importance was the U.S.

There were reports of men with German accents warning people not to board the Lusitania in the days before she set sail. It was reported on in the local newspaper. It's theorized that German intelligence had identified the ship as being a transporter of munitions and wanted to sink her with minimal loss of civilian life. Germany posted warnings in the U.S. warning that all ships flying the British flag would be subject to being sunk without warning and stated that Americans who chose to travel on these ships did so at their own risk.

if you don't believe in god or conspiracy theories and you look down on people and call them "tinfoil hat fags" or anything like that, you are being tricked by dark forces into turning against your brothers and sisters for the illusion that you are smarter. you LITERALLY become the problem. you ARE A MENACE when you think people who recognize bullshit as incorrect. were all on the same team living the same dream. you aren't any smarter than the next guy, you just chose to disagree with something that when believed is meant to help you and keep you awake.

>>17999390

think of people*** not think people

>>17996923
THEY are people who know whats going on, and you are kept in the dark. you can be one of them but THEY don't want you to be. because they think you're not ready

>>17999338
>>17999349
>>17999389

Those thoughts remind me of how much a peasant I am in the scope of world powers.

>>17999349
>I wonder what outside force wanted us in WW1
Look into the Balfour Declaration

>>17997126
no brother, history is being made all the time. they just want us to think otherwise.

File: ethnobotanist Wade Davis.jpg (762KB, 1500x2000px) Image search: [Google]

762KB, 1500x2000px

>>17998737
Read the Serpent and the Rainbow, by Wade Davis, and your opinion of "folk legends" is very likely to change.

>>17999349
Roosevelt pulled similar shit to draw us into WWII. Although that was on a much larger scale because he allowed the Japanese to hit a major naval base.

>>17996904
if i killed somebody i would be bullshiting the law enforcement just like that

>>17997671
I could start bleeping and blooping and doing an interpretive dance. Was that programmed into me too?

>>17999444
It was bound to be done at some point.

>>17999016
I am thoroughly convinced.

File: 1463979888910.jpg (20KB, 240x228px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 240x228px

>>17999016
Did you research this yourself or is this just a pasta?

Because whoever took the time to make it needs to go outside more

I believe that the Clintons are killing people left and right, and they have already killed 4 people this summer.

>>17996828
Love is one of the signs of being in the matrix

>>17996837
>Quantum Immortality
But I want to die.

File: alanwatts.jpg (111KB, 774x900px) Image search: [Google]

111KB, 774x900px

>>17999545
"die" means to move on to the next existence. You can't experience the supposed nothingness that so many people believe in. Nothingness isn't an experience. You aren't going to be trapped in a dark room forever when your life here ends.

Here, give this a listen. Sums up universal immortality pretty well. Alan Watts was a genius.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5FELdBsixGg

File: 1355153515.png (48KB, 288x175px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 288x175px

>>17999016

File: 1463871473810.jpg (25KB, 321x322px) Image search: [Google]

25KB, 321x322px

>>17999551
this is incredible
I hope he's right

>>17997079
it gets further away every year. 4cm a year currently.

>>17998844
lol

>>17997411
are you Welsh?

>>17997474
your mom is hollow anon

>>17997053
Kill yourself.

>>17997966
It is actually in order. Early alphabets were the story of creation. Aleph, A - man. Beth, B - house. Gimel, C - given. Dalet, D - door. He - E, behold, see.

Man enters the house (body) that was given to him as though through a door and beholds the world, etc.

Early alphabets were the story of creation or the elements of creation codified.

>>17999591
lmao sup roastie

>>17998397
I am dyslexic and at worst I need to reread something.
Your friends are either extra bad or vitchy

>>17996901
When you die you go to heaven or hell

File: maxresdefault.jpg (74KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

74KB, 1280x720px

I believe that Satan worshiping jews rule the world. I believe that their plan is to create as much bloodshed as possible as an offer to Lucifer

>>17997990
You act like this isn't posted here weekly.

>>17997079
We have three days.

>>17999591
He's right

>>17997401
Confirmed/ Thanks #401

>>17999759

Until?

>>17999307
Is there validity to this?

>>17996828
David Wynn-Miller quantum grammar

>>18000070
Probably - you had guys like Jimmy Saville, and there were tons of cases of the political elite and child abuse.

>>17996828
The afterlife is a jungle, only the impecable or flukes "reincarnate", survive, or advance.. but there are clusters, spiritual/energetic networks for like minded beings to gravitate to - being religion based or other..Clan/generational based, culture based, or other - heaven or hell. These clusters of consciousness networks exist.... to avoid the jungle of the Great Sea of Awareness..The weak get recycled or merge with these clusters

Mankind (each and everyone one of us) consciousness is conglomerate of borrowed pieces of consciousness of all our cells, from the time of birth it is near maturity and begins to develop on its own. While all our cells dream they are still connected to the our consciousness.

This is the afterlife.

>>17996918
(((they)))

((( >>18000157 )))

>>18000133
Also..

http://youtu.be/nILG72WZ-Zw

>>17997051
I'd like to answer the OP's question by elaborating on this post.

In my opinion, each of us is the God described in this post. And each of us lives his own personal quantum version of existence, intertwining with others but affecting the outcomes of that particular version of reality.

>>18000205
Actually, this is not the only theory I have. Another theory kinda contradicts the first one, but still:

I have a feeling that we might exist within a black hole. The information that gets past the event horizon does not get erased, instead it exists as a hologram - that's what was called 'Akashic records', 'astral plane', that's the reason for extrasensory abilities and predictions. Some people simply find a way to traverse the information stored within the event horizon, while time itself doesn't exist - we move through this 'dimension' because of the situation we are in.

That's also why we see the universe 'expanding' - that's the black hole getting larger.

>>17996991
>updating system of science working
>working
so it is science if doctors research on making hormones for fags to "convert" into something they will never be, but it is not science to study the effects of hormones to cure homosexuality? It's political agenda, made up because it sells and gets you votes, and you fell for it.

>>17996969
Most mammals are gay. Giraffes have so much gay sex that they kinda only have straight sex to procreate.

>>17999727
facts

>>17998737
The fuck

>what is datura stramonium

You shouldn't be speaking about things you have no experience with

>>17997265
Do you even Richard Doty?

>>17998385

Ayyyyy, it's not like you are gonna realize it.

>>17997466
Most accurate post over seen yet.
Desperate, yes. Stupid, maybe. But lonely, absolutely. People have turned into themselves so much that they seek out whatever comforts them.

File: image_6.jpg (91KB, 1000x800px) Image search: [Google]

91KB, 1000x800px

>>17999649

>>18000000

>>17997379
>Tempering

Don't mix Hollow Earth lore with Flat Earth. If anything the latter started to cover the former. Hollow Earth legends don't actually involve an Earth that's physically hollow, or it doesn't have to be. Nearly every single case (which is recorded in almost all the ancient cultures) are about passing through a portal, or an area of land/sea with some kind of mystic barrier (not unlike legends of people passing through time in Bermuda triangle, etc)

The Smoky God is a good story, from an American writer, lawyer & politician who was reportedly told the story from an old norse guy before he died. He claims the entrance was somewhere in the arctic passed the North wind. The Tibetans thought it was in a series of tunnels. Legend has openings or entrances in tunnels, caves, mountains, etc----all over the world---Arctic, antarctic, Bucegi mountains, subterranean India/Incan or Mayan, etc

But don't mix Flat Earth and Hollow Earth, FE is fucking retarded disinfo to discredit something thousands of years old. If there's nothing to it, ask the US gov for the Operation PAPERCLIP files when they took all the Nazi research on it.

>>17999608
That is forbidden knowledge. Stop. Now.

>>17997079
Actually yeah anon it has seemed unusually large to me lately but I haven't said anything till now. Are we Chosen?

File: 1468111590386.jpg (24KB, 480x516px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 480x516px

>>17999346
Agreed

>>17999608
Keep going, or link something

>>17999016

SHUT IT DOWN

>>17998737
Dude there's even a fucking Vice documentary about it.

>>17998223
theres a whole field of philosophy called Epistomology which is about what and how knowledge do be

>>17998404
Or they could just eat some chicken or something.
Man I'm hungry...

>>17999349
Do you have a source for this?

>>17999608
Please continue

>>18000063
cock tribute thread

Donald Trump is working for the Clintons to destroy the GOP and hand the presidency over to her. Meanwhile, Sanders had a gun pointed to his wife's head and was forced to follow suit.

>>17996904
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyoscine_hydrobromide#Crime

faggot

>>17997454
>journey
>crappy

Scariest thing I've ever read on x

File: bbd029095bda0cecbc38593196c6806e (1).jpg (41KB, 500x681px) Image search: [Google]

41KB, 500x681px

>>17999608

>>17998336
Part of the clever ruse

>>17998030
Leaked script for new Vsauce video

>>17997848
Yes

>>18001410
>>17998692
Bernie Sanders wife is being investigated for doing $2 million dollar bank fraud while buying 40 acres of property from a Catholic church, church needed money court and attorney fees for investigation of child molestation.

http://blackpearl.wcax.com/documents/TOENSING.pdf

>>17999608
Can you please translate the story of ehyeh asher ehyeh?

>>17998329
That's ridiculous anon, the entire human race aren't robots who can read your mind. Only I am.

>>17999390
What if I don't believe in god but I do believe in conspiracy theories?

>>17999498
Autist mad at Normies

The little tips on shoelaces are called aglets. Their true purpose is sinister.

>>18000938
Oh, well then it must be true

>>17996828
That all the information we have about the world before year 700 is fabricated bullshit that fuckheads have made up because they would'nt be able to handle the fact that there has been civilizations as advanced as what we are today.

jesus says in the bible to follow him into the house of the water bearer(aquarius)
i believe there will be a raputre/apocalypse type thingy where when astrologically we get there those following satan and lucifer(to include all new age neo-occult sigils and rituals makers) will have a delusion of experience eternity by creating their realities forever and those following christ getting reborn in each different state of mind will find heaven.

File: asdfasdf.png (1MB, 1366x768px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1366x768px

>>17996828
germs

reptiles or worse
theres way too much proof, pic related

>>18001900
The fuck is this? Why do you keep posting it every thread?

File: lllmkl.jpg (58KB, 500x690px) Image search: [Google]

58KB, 500x690px

>>17996942

YOU SAD SHIT FOR BRAINS FAGGOT.
>'Since we know that god and the creation are one and the same'
trying to sound deep just exposes your low level of brain function, please stop spouting bullshit. you dont read as smart, just pretentious and conceited.
>Since we know that god and the creation are one and the same'
what a piece of shit you are, i can't believe you said that. never talk again. shame on you.

>>18001916
This is /x/. Why even come here if you're going to shoot down people's wild ideas?

>>18000070
finders case, mark detrueax, franklin coverup, jeffery epstein

>>18000070
McCullay Caulkin, Corey Feldman, Oooo a good one and a popular one is Dan "Get in the Van" Schneider.

>Dan "Hold her tighter, she's a fighter" Schneider
>Dan "Preteen Pussy Annihilator" Schneider

Ehh... theres a lot more, too lazy to type them all out

We are all in a computer program similar to the Matrix, that alien beings created. The worst part is that I don't know how to escape it
Or if I want to

>>18001900
Is no one gonn a tell me what this picture is and why does it keeps getting reposted?

I have to go with Santa Claus here. Maybe Christmas could have different continental allotment so he isn't busy all the time.

>>18001900
>>18001914
>>18002029
stop forcing your shitty meme

>>17996828
Skeletons aren't real. They're just an urban legend perpetuated by big dairy to get us to drink milk.

>>17996828
The global pestilence black market.

Emporia State University's biology department, and many universities across the globe are associated

I be live peoples souls go around the planet and generators and such suck the soul energy and convert it to batteries. So you listen to an iPod or use a flash light your using up your grandmother's soul. The lucigarians are promoting energy use to dissipate this soul energy that we call electricity so that when it runs out they will have ultimate power

>>18002207
You were only pretending?

I also feel the Catholic church has a monopoly on magic. More people that be live the more powerful the effect so they would kill and weed out that to make is my less powerful and more manageable. Better to have all of 25% the just a fraction of a whole. They did this to keep power. They tried to kill magic. It does still exist but not like it did

I think OJ committed those murders...

>>18002249
He had a book idea... called something along the lines of... "if I did it".

>>18002249
Fucking tinfoil

>>17996904
/del/ver here.


Hell, I wouldn't even want someone on scopolamine to go to the store to make a beer run, much less to assassinate anyone.

If you want to use /del/ for crime, you use it to rob, rape (although, anticholingerics dry out mucosa, so you may need loads of lube) or poison them. Not to wipe their memory.

>>17999350

t. Demiurge cuck

>>18002285
the problem with the whole gnostic worldview is pretty obvious:

if God is an evil demiurge, how do you know super-god isn't an evil demiurge too? Basically, how do you know how "deep" things go?

Are you in the only un-real reality, or are there more above?

If that's the case, regardless of your struggling, there will come a point where a sufficient demiurge exists to trick you into bending the knee to it, so it makes all of gnosticism's endeavours pointless.

Either God is who he say's he is, or you should just pretend he is, because it's pointless to do otherwise.

>>17997265

Not crazy. It's just debatable what is actually down there as we have no way of knowing.

>Brexit was engineered so that either the monarchy or British army could take control of the UK
>Brexit happens
>Labour basically in civil war, party is imploding will be gone soon and members will be making own party
>Conservatives going to civil war soon
>British army already said if Labour get in then they will coup against their government

>>17996828
THIS, because it is not crazy.

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPoY4IFW1lI

At the moment: The Tavistock Institute and how they created the Beatles, the counterculture movement and the brainwashing of a generation.

That I'm not a car

>>17996828

The scariest conspiracy theory I've ever heard, is that all of this world is actually 100% just as we see it.
There are no "masterminds" controling humanity, 9/11 wasn't an insidejob, there is no god, only people. And the people are driven by greed, which made the world look like what it is today!


But that theory is just crazy #iwanttobelieve

>>17996926
>the crest corporation requires toothpaste sales to stay in business
Yeah right, kek.

>>17999319
He said conspiracy theories.
The conspiracy theory would be to believe a government for a world power secretly conspired to eliminate a group of people based on their religion and then burned documents proving that it ever happened.

Regardless of if you believe in the Holocaust or not, it's not a conspiracy unless someone conspires.

>>18002652
>>British army already said if Labour get in then they will coup against their government

wtf m8

source

File: This Christmas, Dan 'She's A Fighter' Schneider IS Santa Claus.webm (2MB, 640x360px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 640x360px

>>18001985
"Beercan" Dan Schneider
Dan "The Man With the Master Plan" Schneider
Dan "Put Drugs In Her Cider Then Stick It Inside Her" Schneider

File: subtle confession by Disco Dan The Cunny Man Schneider.webm (496KB, 250x175px) Image search: [Google]

496KB, 250x175px

>>18003136

>>18000327
Stupidest post I've ever read on 4chan. Congratulations

>>17996828
That democracy is real.

>>17996828
Girls might be real

>>18000847

agreed agreed

fuck the kikes

Flat earth.
Used to laugh at those people for years, but now I'm slowly falling under their spell.

>>17996828
Every soul but mine has passed on and is either alive and dead or just dead.
MIJ?

File: How-you-recruit-a-horseman.jpg (43KB, 400x524px) Image search: [Google]

43KB, 400x524px

>>18004401
What do u all think about that?

>>17998282
Not an argument. The severity of a mental disease doesn't make it not a disease, and if you think being a homosexual doesn't effect your quality of life you're a dumbass.

>>18004444
Were not talking about that now we are talking about the coming of christ and him making me king.

File: 1468965191411.jpg (6KB, 223x258px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 223x258px

>>17996942
>Since we know that god and the creation are one and the same.

>>17996969
>'Modern art' was sponsored by the CIA
this has been confirmed. some Psyche-ops thing against russia

>>17998698
>drill bit torque and breakage
>cost of drilling
>intense geothermal heat with depth

>>18003136
Dan "The man with a plan to lick her clam, tie her up and slap her with your ham, start with 2 fingers then your hand, no reporting and no bans, fondle her clit then her cans, rip off her clothes and throw her in the van, not one - not two - but a 6 man gangbang, into her mouth right inside her, make that pussy wider and wider, soft smooth skin better is the whiter, pound her so hard they call me the Hymen Collider, give me a ciggie this'll be an all-night

>>17997884
Our DNA contains "Squids are stupid" in it.

File: 1418605929834.png (366KB, 665x384px) Image search: [Google]

366KB, 665x384px

Do SFW boards still stop bumping after 300 posts? I dont want this thread to die

If this is the end, then gentlemen, posting with you has been the greatest honor of my life

>>17997164

Tuberculosis was one of the consumption diseases

>>18004637
315

File: 1467599808822.jpg (24KB, 570x412px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 570x412px

>>17996969
>'Modern art' was sponsored by the CIA (the 'modern art' pieces sold for millions is actually money laundering done by billionaires and millionaires

First time I've heard of this, I like this. Money based motive... art is already a medium for this. sounds fun.

>>18004577
You know, there are some pastas we should forget entirely.

>>17998385

It used to terrify me too, but don't think of it as a ride. Think of it as a theme park, an infinite theme park that is constantly getting upgraded and expanded with new rides. For eternity.

Yes there will be some shitty rides, but they always come to an end.
Plot Twist: there are an infinite amount of theme parks (universes) also.

File: 1468909310625.jpg (72KB, 650x830px) Image search: [Google]

72KB, 650x830px

>>17997051
This I agree with but I'll elaborate. If god lives each life in us, as us then we "god" or god consciousness relive all our mistakes. Heaven and hell is not only in our heads in this life but a direct result of what our actions karma create. So hitler yes more or less gassed and ruined many people, but he will have to relive each and every one of those lives he destroyed. This is why altruistic motive is the most powerful, though often misguided. help those around you and you will be helped in another life. Its hard to be mad at people with this mindset.

>>17999277

Probably.

I mean. You can't have it both ways. If its a mental illness, then the irrational hatred of it is also a mental illness. Why wouldn't they be related?

>>18002280
Fuck people who don't respect /del/, it's some dangerous ass shit not to be fucked with by weak minded individuals.

That being said, Jason Simpson killed Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman

I believe my brain was operated on, and I somehow have no memory of it or the period before or after. Would be easier to not believe if I hadnt have found the stitches and had others confirmed them to be stitches.

>>17998766
>>17998755
2 in a row

The world is a simulation for me to experience, Everything happens for me to see. I will report back what i saw once i wake up

File: 1465856723886.jpg (68KB, 540x730px) Image search: [Google]

68KB, 540x730px

If you die of an "accident" you will just wake up in another reality where you are still alive. It has happened to me several times

File: 115666.jpg (160KB, 538x725px) Image search: [Google]

160KB, 538x725px

>>17996969
>le jew memes

neckbeard spotted

File: laughing.jpg (20KB, 400x266px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 400x266px

>>17998282
>being an abomination
>not being able to have kids
>sticking your penis in other men's anuses and getting aids

Yeah, doesn't affect their quality of life at all..

>>18000676
>>17997466
What do you two believe in?

>>18002312
sounds pretty cucked to me.

If reincarnation was real and we are living our lives right now, only for us to be a different person after our inevitable death, how are we living right now?

Sounds retarded, but take it like memory loss. Like amnesia. Take before hitting your head to be your current life, then take the "hitting your head and getting amnesia" to be death. Then waking up afterwards is your new reincarnated life.

Am I making any sense here? Does anyone get what I'm trying to say???

>>18002253
It was leaked. Quite the read.

File: Guy Incognito movie reviews.jpg (49KB, 500x550px) Image search: [Google]

49KB, 500x550px

>>17999304
Never heard of it

You shouldn't google it

Just forget about it

t. Guy Incognito

one time i smoked weed and this guy that i thought was my friend started talking to me in like snake tongue and ig ot freaked out and he told me that he was a reptilian from that day i don't even know what is real anymore, he said theres 14 days, and that sometimes reality is a dream and that "they" rule this world

that life will become good one day

>>18004918
when I'm really high I can't even focus on what people are saying

...short term memory loss

File: scarecrowgun1.jpg (19KB, 359x300px) Image search: [Google]

19KB, 359x300px

>>17997990

Anyone remember the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz carrying a gun?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p9hcXm2vr5I

File: schneider mk feetra coverart.jpg (151KB, 720x563px) Image search: [Google]

151KB, 720x563px

>>18001985
>>18003136
>>18004577


>>18004708
>You know, there are some pastas we should forget entirely.

Go to bed Dan

I think hormones are put in chicken and milk and they make men act more effeminate and less hairy and girls have puberty younger and get bigger breasts and butts

>>18000304
You are so poorly misinformed it is kind of cute.

>>17997131
The big bang does not claim to know If there were anything before it or what was before! It only claims that at a certain point our current understanding of physics did not apply and that evidence suggests that all energy was condensed in one point.

>>17999576
Yiss ser

That's it folks, thread is officially kill after 3 days

Thanks for the ridiculousness only /x/ can provide

t. OP

>>18005141
What is real life for 500 Alex ?

The majority of the media was involved in a serious plot to prevent Bernie Sanders from winning the nomination this year, the dnc and the liberal media worked together on this and were very conscious of it

>>17998145
Should we ask for a patch?

>>17998329
Everybody else is capable of telepathy, except you.

You're not being told this because it's cruel to pick on invalids, and so everyone speaks to each other when you are nearby.

> How many times have you felt like someone already knows what you're going to say?
> How many times have you guessed what someone will say as soon as they open their mouth?

You're not entirely deaf, only almost.

>>18004839
I second that.
8 times so far.