For those of you who would actually like to become magicians and witches, warlocks, and wizards, would you like some guidance?
I can show you where to look for the magickal arts.
>>17860924
hurr durr i am so enlightened look at me sage
WE HAVE THIS THREAD 10 TIMES A FUCKING DAY FUCK OFF YOU FAGGOT
>>17860924
/tg/?
>>17860924
First you are gonna want to join a cabal of wizards like yourself. Feel free to do research into any of the various "secret societies" that you want.
The main thing to remember when it comes to secret societies is that they fall into one of two main categories: Order, and Chaos. Each has it's own beliefs and practices but they are usually each based upon order or chaos in some from. Do your research on Order and Chaos before deciding which society to join. Once you join a secret society and you move on up the ranks, things can get really weird really fast.
Tell me everything I need to know about the New World Order.
>>17860827
It doesn't real.
It doesn't exist.
Hear this: When our masters' work is done, every living thing will have the status of a machine. There will be no creativity, only productivity. Instead of love there will be fear and distrust, instead of surrender there will be submission. We will replace contact with isolation, and joy with shame. Hope will cease to exist as a concept. We will cover the earth with steel and with concrete, this planet will be a factory farm producing morons to fuel and mantain the factory engines and feed our masters. There will be an electronic policeman in every head. Your children will be born in chains, live only to serve and die in anguish and ignorance. Look around you, the process is already in its final stages. And you, like everyone else, will take your place on the production line.
I need Christian religious rituals
>>17860731
Pour jizz on people.
>>17860731
Prayer
>>17860731
say this
"dear god,
I am sorry for my sins.
In the name of the father
the son
and the holy spirit amen."
that's all you gotta do. That's how you put your god bar back up to full.
every time you sin say that.
What are some underused themes and creatures for horror? You guys seem pretty good a sussing out overused shit and all.
Will try and find shit to post till the magic begins.
You have had a strange feeling for a few days now. Today you’ve been feeling very energetic and tired at the same time. You sit, exhausted and full of energy, at your desk. Your arm has been itching. It’s killing you now. You look at your forearm and see it for the first time. Something is moving under your skin. It is shifting around. Your muscle spasms and you realize there are dozens moving toward the surface.
My dad was a shaman, my 3xgreat grandmother was a witch
From what ive heard witches pass their "powers" on to the future family members
And i never got to know my father, but my mother tells me that he was very spiritually focused on me, and says that he passed his "powers" on me or something
Right now im far away from civilization living with my grandfather in a secluded and quiet place, so i wanted to try something out, but what exactly i do not know
Id like to summon some basic spirits for guidance or something, but i basically know nothing about it, and all the links on google seem so, i dont know, stereotypical? Do they work?
Any good advice from personal experience?
And are these so called "powers" real and can they benefit me somehow?
Ive also heard that you should be cautipus when summoning spirits, as you could summon angry ones pr piss off the good ones
For this sort of thing, you'd probably looking at going into the woods far away from other people, and basically meditating in front of a small fire lit for ritual purposes.
I'm not sure exactly what school or tradition your family comes from, but the basics should be pretty similar across tribes.
>>17860691
They all came from Russia, i was born and raised in a scandinavian country by my mother, we havemt discussed this thing much
Also, how do i light a fire for ritual purposes?
Back in 24 October 2008 when I was 10 years old at the time my teacher gave me an assignment asking what I wanna be when I grow up so I wrote it she didn't mark it because I didn't write what I was supposed to on the paper it was something much creepier. 3 Years later my mother finds the pages I wrote in a book because I had written about my grandmother in them and she thought it was sweet so she tore them out framed it and gave it to her she was very sick at the time suffering with depression and Parkinson's disease which she took many pills for, her sickness got worse and she dies when I reached 18 years old after the funeral and going through her stuff I found what I had written on that paper and when I read it my heart stopped idk how the fuck it even happened but after showing my family from the time I wrote that paper I just fucking predicted my whole fucking life and everything I had in there I never went out to get it like the boat I found it drifting in the see, the turtles I saved from the road and my dogs I saved aswell even the truck came to me ppl abandoned it and I got it and more everything I wrote came true and my family freaked out I showed everyone this and no one knows what to say is something wrong with me. Also after finding that paper I have been having so many creepy dreams about her too one where I dreamed about the curtains in her house moving and light turning on and off and when I passed her house they where moved and different lights where on it happened wtf also a dream where she was being attach some black thing idk what is going help me pls tell me how this is happening.
Pls help me understand what is happening my family don't know what to say to me
>>17860586
It's nothing, go back to bed OP
>>17860627
After writing that so many years ago and it all happened and I only now find it in my dead grans house don't u think it's a bit fucked up
My Trees dont look real
>>17860555
Touch them, see if they are real.
better call bob ross
>>17860555
Neither your dick
Alright, something very weird happen to me yesterday, and I'm not sure how I feel about this. It may not sound very exciting or serious, but I've never been so troubled in my entire life.
Me and my bro go on bicycle tours a lot and one of our favourite roads is an open "emergency lane" just off a highway. Anyway, the road ends with an unused overpass over the highway, nobody uses that particular overpass, because there are two more convinient a kilometer in each direction. So me and my bro usually make a stop there, rest a bit and come back the same way. From the top of that overpass, we can see the road to the other side of the overpass, going down, then slightly turning to the left and into the village about a kilomoter away. We finally decided to take a trip around the area, so that we would enter that overpass from that other side. I checked the map, found a way, and we set off. Here's where things got weird to us.
So we found the way easly, and when after an hour of riding we could see the overpass from that other side, it all looked... different. The road seemed different, it was a ground, dusty road, even though from that overpassed it looked like asphalt, there were trees along the way, but we didn't remember seeing any from the overpass. Finally the way onto that overpass was a "spiral", sort of a long turn to make it less steap, but we knew for a fact, that it's not what we saw from that overpass. In fact, until we got onto it, we thought we were lost and it's not the one we tried to reach. We realized that it's the right one once we looked the way we usually come from, it looked the same as always. And when we looked back the way we came from this time, it looked just like it looked when we were going through that area, but very different from what we usually see. I mean, the terrain was the same, the same village in the distance, but the trees, the road, the driveway - it definitely looked different. My bro agrees with me.
Is my brain lying to me?
I get lost when I get stoned. Were you stoned?
>>17860528
Not stoned and not lost
Something similar happened to me once.
There was an old field with became a construction site for a residential project.
It was at night, maybe 13 years ago.
There was no one else out there.
I was about 17 at the time, horrible insomnia.
So I just went out and explored at night.
Back to the field, it was leveled and prepared for building on.
I walked right across it at a fast pace, to get to the other side where there were already some built houses.
On my way back, going the same way I came, the ground was full of craters, some 10+ feet deep.
It took me maybe 3 hours to cross the same area I just walked through in maybe 10 minutes the first time around!
The next day it was flat again.
I have never done any drugs in my life, still don't know what happened.
ONCE UPON A TIME
THERE WAS
A Faggot Named OP
Who tried to be an aerobic killing machine
Hey, look at this photo taken by my cousin 4 years ago. It is NOT edited. It's 100% real. What do you think?
>>17860301
Very fake.
A shitty picture
>>17860301
TWO HEADED OROBAS????
here ya go, kiddos... thought all y'all /x/ users might like this
5 Mysterious Photos That Should Not Exist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZ0hHOWzV8k
>>17860231
>listbait
No thanks
>>17860231
You are an idiot, go find out what that really is stooooooooopid
>>17860231
>dat thumbnail
It barely exists as it is
Hi, /x/. I want to get into witchcraft and I have a certain kind of spell I want to cast in mind. I want to cast an imacculate conception spell on my partner because they live far away from me, very far away in fact(I live in BC, they live in Ohio)
Has such a spell been done before? What is needed to preform it? What would happen if I fuck it up?
pic unrelated
>>17860217
>you again
Classic autism
>>17860217
>imacculate conception
>>17860495
Are you spooked?
How do I make something spoopy happen right now?
>>17860190
Put thumb in poophole. Pull out very quickly. Repeat. Add lube as necessary.
Chant Abrlaah huackbardara while you do it.
I bet something poopy will happen soon.
Huff whatever chemicals you have under the sink
>>17860190
Walk into completely dark room. Place mirror in front of you. Light a small candle and stare into mirror, preferably with the mirror a few inches from your face. Guaranteed fright.
If you feel it say blasphemous things too, piss off some ghosts.
Hello there
i am new around here and 4chan too, i've been having paranormal things happen around my house the past 2 days
i DO NOT believe in any of it, i just wanted your input, thanks.
ok
Good luck with that.
don't worry too much about the spirits
if you are a Christian all they can do is spook you
if they are of God, you will know eventually
I was heading downstairs and heard a woman humming a lullaby in my sisters room. I peered into her room but no trace of anyone. Also there is a creepy painting always changing. Clear skies to dark clouds and Ravens, a family picnic to a armed soldier , a father and son fishing to a father fishing, to another soldier.
>>17860162
>proof: my ass
It's me again, just asking for any advice you can give, also here is a picture of the painting, I tried to be sneaky to make sure it doesn't stop changing if it realizes I took the picture. Sorry it's blurry, btw the clouds at the top are starting to clear and no more Ravens think it's a good sign
>>17860162
I see the drugs have kicked in...please,continue with this nonsensical gibberish. I'm fairly certain that you have gone mad.