Time to brush up on those E3 buzzwords, and what they actually mean.
>Suspenseful = Jumpscares
>Cinematic = By-the-numbers drivel
>Innovative = Mundane
>Competetive = We want the E-sports crowd
>Inspired By = Borderline copyright infringing upon
>$59.99 = Worth $20 tops
>Deluxe Edition = One additional skin
>Pre-Order Now! = Recouping costs before reviews hit
>Diversity = We want the tumblr crowd
>Exclusive = Multiplat / GOTY edition in 6 months
>Game of the Year = All devs label their releases as their GOTY.
>10/10 = I'm so funny and original in my scores!
>Story-driven = Filled with cutscenes, see "Cinematic"
>Compelling = See "Cinematic"
>Bring Your Friends! = Our single-player portion is garbage, or nonexistent.
>Sexy = PG-13 innuendo
>Dynamic = Glitchy, buggy AI and lots of crashes, no QA
>Procedurally Generated = We substitute content with randomization algorithms
>8-bit = 16/32-bit graphics with chiptunes
>Early Access = Money grab with no intent of release
>Lifetime Subscription = It'll tank and go F2P within six months
>Controversial = Trying too hard
>Wider audience = Dumbed down
>Progressive = See Diversity
>Free to Play = Unplayable until you fork over $20
>DLC = B-Team / C-Team afterthought garbage
>Expansions = Dead outside of MMOs. MMOs mean 10 more levels of the same shit.
>Rich History = 2 sentences of lore.
>New IP = Proof of concept that won't be fully realized until the sequel, and driven into the ground from 3 onward.
>Sequel = Cash grab
>Prequel = Hanging off the coat-tails of an established franchise, not associated with the original team and only vaguely familiar with the franchise
>Season pass = Get about 50% of the DLC for 150% the price
>Exciting new features = Gimmicks
>Fun = Simple
>Complex = 2 whole choices
>Hilarious / Funny = Full of memes
>Thought-provoking = Pretentious hipster garbage
I know it will be shit and boring and yet i am still hyped
E3 seems to be arriving faster and faster each other, every year I accomplish nothing
>Being excited for a shareholder confrence
Square Enix will save E3.
>Just Cause 3
>Final Fantasy XV
>Kingdom Hearts 3
>Deus Ex: Mankind Divided
>Rise of the Tomb Raider
>Dragon Quest Heroes
Sony will be shit. Microsoft will be shit. EA will be shit. Ubishit. Nintendo won't be there.
Yeah same every year for me. I end up buying lots of snacks and having both the countdown timers on my second monitor, just really really excited. Every year I go away feeling disappointed.
>tfw full grown functioning adult
>still take 3 days off of work so that I can build a massive blanket and pillow fort, stuff it with Dew and Doritos i like them okay, and spend 72 hours watching things with my friends
E3 is the last bastion of childhood in my life, and its awesome.
No anon, that's not what getting old feels like. That's what being old feels like.
I just want to see Scallebound... for fuck sake MS, show us something already.
Oh boy, time for more mediocrity and false advertising (which is illegal but isn't going to affect these lying companies because VIDYA GAMES LOL). Literally any other industry wouldn't have this cringe fest.
>Being this fucking new
Nigger you do realize we only watch it because /v/ turns into a major shit fest
The worst thing is that after the horrible Sony, Nintendo and Konami conferences, which were few of the most enjoyable conferences ever, every company just went the save road trying way too hard so they dont fuck up.
>your image won't be satirical in 5 years
Does anybody remember a few years ago when E3 was scaled down for a while and they started doing video interviews with developers in their hotel rooms or something. Did that actually happen or am I just making shit up?
You know what's sad...
This post is terrifyingly true.
Thats the fucking problem, E3 threads may as well be e-celeb general, both threads are cancer
Fuck you and fuck this thread
No Atlus will
>New Etrian Odyssey game
>Devil Summoner for West
SMT5 announcement for PS4 with Nocturne lead staff coming back as well as the old character designer
Soo they are essentially e-celeb threads?
I'm not excited by anything in your post.
Getting closer by the second
>implying it won't be
PS4 is picking up in Japan and Atlus will have demon models to re-use from Persona 5 so it makes sense.
Also SMT4 only sold 20k more copies then SMT3 in Japan and SMT3 is over 10 years old.
Even if there's an install base for handhelds, Atlus know its hardcore fans play on console and if it's not PS4 then it will be on a large install base such as the PS3
I'm preparing myself physically and mentally for all of the Nintendo shitposting that will inevitably ensue
>Nintendo won E3! I thought they would announce Metroid/F-Zero/etc. but they didn't, but surely next year!
>Nintendo can't win E3 because they didn't present onstage, they did a Nintendo Direct :^)
Every fucking year, this same fucking bullshit every year. At least everyone can agree when Microsoft or Sony blows it but you faggots get hung up on the same stupid shit with Nintendo every damn year even when they have a good presentation.
Yes I'm mad
>tfw last TPP trailer
>tfw when final E3 with MGS in a (presumably) long while
How many times is Squilliam gonna have a heart attack before E3 god damn
>neogaf let go. Everybody except for you agreed on this.
But that's wrong. Nintendo won the most neogaf award.
The way I worded my post was terrible. I think Nintendo's presentation is usually one of the best at E3 every year. I'm just sick of people whining about the games that Nintendo /didn't/ show - Metroid and F-Zero and the like - and bitching about Nintendo's presentation format like it really matters at all. Just talk about the games you actually got to see you raging faggots.
I can't wait for the funny videos to come out of this year's e3.
>10 years old
well i feel old.
it scares me how true this is.
A few years ago, this list would have been shitposted to death, but now...
must suck to not be a nintendo fan, eh?
Every e3, sony and microsoft shit the bed. You could say Sony 2013 was nice, but when you think about it, it was only nice because of all this "Lel we are not Microshit!"-stuff that made them seem smug and cunning. We all know by now that the ps4 is exactly like The One and xbox360, in that its #4ourwallets and not for the consumers.
inb4 nintentoddler, I have a ps3 and the xbox360. ps4 litteraly has no games as of now and The One is just a fucking joke that forgot its funny
I come from the future, at the moment im at the E3 of 2015 and i can say
HL3 got released
Microsoft is dead
Consoles are dead
Linux is THE os now
Nintendo is dead
EA got bombed by terrorists
Valve has released a device which physically integrates you into games.
>must suck to not be a Nintendo fan
>Literally useless on it's own
>The only console with no future
Even the Xbone has more of a future Nintenyearold. Nobody cares about Nintendo games, hence the Wii Us laughable sales
It just fails as a stand alone product.
Serious question. Why do MLP fans get shit but Nintendo fans get a free pass?
because nintendo games are aimed at everyone, they're about fun. It wouldn't make sense for them to market exclusively towards children. MLP is made for little girls and the people who watch it generally masturbate to cartoon horses
>you buy a gaming console to play video games, so the wii u playing wii u games and even wii games is good on it-
>HURP DURP NOP IT NEEDS TO PLAY MUH MOOVEEEEES!
Look I bought a DVD player for like 30€. It plays DVD's and CD's and even has USB support incase you have some files you want to play. It works just fine, no need to buy a ps4 or xbone to do it all.
Now that we have that out of the way, you forgot that the most important thing a gaming console needs to have is videogames, and it looks pretty good for the wii u this year with xenoblade and splatoon coming out.
>Aimed at everyone
>LOL, THAT IS AIMED AT KIDS
Oh yes. I cannot wait. The thrilling fun of watching the industry further lobotomize itself.
It's a shame E3 won't end with a large explosion, completely finishing off the lifeless corpse that the industry has become.
>Offline MMO running at 720p @ 30fps
The Wii U is having another abysmal year (compared to Sonys:
and even Xbox Ones) and missing out on every 3rd party game on top of it's underwhelming upcoming library.
You can throw around the 'MUH MOVIE' excuse all you want bro, PS4 and XBone beat it every which way you look at it.
Here's some facts
>PS4 has a total of 406 games, XO has a total of 329 games.
>PS4 has 178 games available to purchase, >XO has 156 games available to purchase.
>PS4 has 44 console exclusives, XO has 41 console exclusives.
>PS4 has 43 Sony exclusives, XO has 19 Microsoft exculsives.
>Wii U has 96 available games for purchase
>PS4 has objectively more games than the Wii U
>PS4 has objectively more exclusives than the Wii U had in it's first year
>PS4 has objectively more exclusives coming out in 2015
>PS4 has objectively more games coming out in 2015
>PS4 is objectively more powerful
>PS4 is objectively raping the Wii U in sales
It's our version of the Superb Owl. Only comes once a year.
It's shitposting I can mildly tolerate. It's the 24/7 shitposting all year that wishes a majority of the board frequenters were dead.
Gentlemen and traps it has been an honor playing with you.
I know you are angry, yet you dont have to cry about it like a darn sonydrone.
first of all, why should I care that a game runs in 720p or 1080p? I know 1080p look better, but does that realy affect my gameplay experience that much? I played MK8 and it looked realy sweet while moving, and I believe that was 720p aswell. I give you the 30 fps, but if I remember correctly, xenoblade does run at 60, but I may be wrong here.
second of all, i know you are shitposting if you pretend to not know about splatoon,
third of all, more doesnt mean better. Quality over quantity. Which big games await ps4? right of the bat, I can only say Bloodborne. Thats it. Persona 5 is aviable on the ps3, and MGSV will run perfectly on my pc. One game worth mentioning.
Now I know you like to throw around numbers, but consider that the PStore is filled with ports from ps1/ps2 (so they dont count) and shovelware shit (they do count but arent worth mentioning). So yeah, what game is there on the ps4 that will be worth a purchase? Bloodborne is just one, and we all know it will be a casualized Dark Souls.
and, retard, you threw the movie shit around in the first place. remember the multimedia shit you brought up first.
mfw i created the ugly mii character
>tfw the fantasy E3 that everyone dreams of where not only do all of their most longed-for sequels happen but also new IPs by great established devs with brickshittingly hype-inducing trailers does not and never will exist
The criteria for 'Winning E3' these days should be, do you come out of it significantly interested in and pleased about future products? Have you been effectively communicated to as a consumer, plus have you been entertained rather than bored?
source on that.
I want to read on exactly what happend
Do you guys we can do pic related this year too?
Also, hype for Cyberpunk 2077 inevitable trailer.
Im sure there's better sources, just google santiago chile elevator and theres a few other results.
OP you better have a folder full of these fucking things or this shit's gonna get stale real quick
Because all Nintendo games = muh nostalgia
Nintendrones are way worse than mega-bronies man.
>That feel when you see the E3 as a minor event because you dont care about console games anymore.
Theres so little content for PC master race compared to consoles, feels bad man.
I got the point just by looking at those thumbnails..
I only take two days off, but pretty much the same deal ('cept for the friends part). Every year, employees at my work get two "Personal Development Days" they need to use. I've used them on E3 for three of the past four years. Feels good, man.
Listmaker here. You can always add to the list, mang.
It's kinda weird to think about video games' presence on television in the past decade or so. I remember being in high school back in 2004-2006 and having to try and get around the school's blocks to watch E3 conferences. I remember hearing about how E3 would air on G4, but that G4 would have commercial breaks. I think Sessler even audibly complained about it on-air, which eventually lead to them being commercial-free. Not too long ago there were three different channels airing E3 conferences: G4, Spike, and, oddly enough, MTV2. Was pretty neat being able to turn on the tv and have E3 shit on whilst I browsed the internet on my computer.
Last year had nothing on tv, if memory serves me right. But it wasn't a big deal for me as I Just connected my computer to my tv and streamed the conferences and daily shit on there whilst browsing /v/ on my computer.
Wondering if video games will ever make it back to mainstream television again, or if we're just past that time.
>being this triggered
>thinks Xenoblade runs at 60fps
What big games?
>Let it Die
>New Guerilla game
>Gran Turismo 7
>New God of War
>New Ratchet and Clank
> Omega Quintet
>Fairy Fencer F Advent Dark Force
>Everybody's gone to rapture
Sony exclusive (b-but Sonys continued support of the PS3 is bad!)
>Dragon Quest Heroes
> SK Estival versus
>The [email protected]
>God Eater 2
>What Remains of Edith Finch
> Summer Lesson
> Senran Kagura Estival Versus
>Earth Defence Force 4.1
>Drawn to Death
>Cygames' PS4 Project
>NIS's 2nd PS4 Project
>SCEJ x Level-5's JRPG
>Other weeb games
Never Ever tier:
>Final Fantasy XV
>Final Fantasy Type 0
>Kingdom Hearts 3
Not to mention the fact that we aren't missing out on the other big multiplats (like the Pii U)
>Kingdom Hearts 3
>Batman Arkham Knight
>Killing Floor 2
>Street Fighter V
>Vanishing of Etran Carter
>No man's Sky
>Among the Sleep
Take your pick
>457 games on the list
>Doesn't have a 'playable' counter like Xbox One and PS4
>mfw Wii U literally has no games
Last year's was pretty fun with the Nintendo Treehouse thing going on all week. There were also plenty of other streams to where I had several going on at once usually.
2013 was definitely better, however, solely because of Kingdom Hearts 3. Just the fact that that was revealed means I am completely cool with whatever happens at E3 in the future. Plus we're getting Fallout 4 this year, so that'll be neat.
Holy fuck, Nintenyearolds BTFO.
It's too fucking accurate.
>A bunch of kiddie crap like Kirby and Yoshi
>LOL, I AM HYPED
>A bunch of kiddie crap like My Little Pony
>LOL, LOOK AT THAT AUTISTIC MAN CHILD
I started work on designing a bingo card, I just don't know what to put in these squares. What I'm thinking so far
>Somebody talks about feminism and women characters, bonus points if Anita & friends show up on-stage
>Excessive use of buzzwords, >>286006183
>New Call of Duty
>Graphics that will definitely be downgraded before release
I know you fuckers have some ideas, let me hear them. Also, what should go in the free space?
you don't have to be so upset dude
I hate to rain on your parade, but you can't do a general E3 Bingo card. You have to do one for each conference. This year it's Bethesda, Microsoft, EA, Ubisoft, Sony, & Nintendo (and maybe Konami and Squeenix).
>An art style dictates the audience of a game
Surely you haven't played Captain Toad's Mummy-Me Maze forever, or the final boss and challenge mode of Kirby & the Rainbow Curse.
>w-what games does the PS4 even have coming out?
>Lists a fuck load
I've been disappointed by E3 three times in a row now. 2012 one was complete shit, 2013 and 2014 ones were alright but huge disappointments in terms of actual new ideas and IPs.
I remember back in the day when games wanted to differentiate themselves from another , but now they just follow the latest fad in hope that the public wants the same shit, but in a new package. Bleh.
No new original IPs, nothing done with new console power (there's not much of it, but we could use some more physics stuff for example, or more level interaction)... I always hope this year is the year when everyone brings out their big guns.
And ironically, I loathe Bethesda and Zenimax, but I'm looking forward to their press release the most because of Doom 4 and Dishonored 2. Oh well.
>I-I'm not a spamming Sonygger
>I have lots of games to play on my PS4, that's why I'm here on /v/ to shitpost
Let's see what we have to look forward to, these are my predictions:
Bethesda Press Show:
>more of Wolfenstein expansion pack
>Elder Scrolls Online goes f2p
>new version of Prey 2?
>Viscerals Star Wars game?
>Mass Effect 4?
>new AC, or two
>Rainbow Six Siege
>stupid dance shit and other shovelware
Beyond Good and Evil 2 :(
>more shovelware shit
>more Until Dawn shit
>something from Guerrila games
>something from Media Molecule
>other first party games?
It's a copy pasta bro, there's no secret there.
Read who that anon was replying too.
>Quality over quantity. Which big games await ps4?
So the anon posted the copy pasta listing said big games.
What's got you so hot and bothered?
You tryin to give me a relapse son?