>Bro, what if i make a carbon copy of nomadic raiders but

>>87209868
>Bro what if I have knights but instead of Sir they are Ser? That's original right???
AMERICAN TOLKEIN

>>87209868
>>87209976
These are very accurate.

GRRM is not Tolkein. Tolkein was good at world building. GRRM just adopts out history and mythology into one "new" world of Planetos. His actual talent lies in character writing and character building and subverting (((tropes))) of fantasy and fiction series.

>>87209868
>>87209976
None of these bother me.

>>87210090
I know senpai, I'm just meming. I actually love the books

>>87210090
Wair, dont tell me that the fucking world where got is based in is called planetos, holy shit

>>87210129
I know you were memeing senpai. I wasn't crticising you. Just retarded normies.

>>87209976
>DUDE WHAT IF I MAKE NAZIS
>DUDE LISTEN
>BUT CALL HIM ORCS? COOL RIGHT?
This child's tale is absolutely undefendable in 2017.
GRRM is not close to being perfect but at least he tries to add depth to his characters.

>>87209868
Horrible prose in general. Feels like reading fan fiction.

>>87210159
I'm 90% sure it's an unofficial fan title for lack of a better term.

>>87210159
It's just a fan name since

DOD WHAT IB I CALL ASIA ASSHAI MAOMAO

ABID WHAT IB I CALL LAND OF RISING SUN ASSHAI BY DA SHADOW GEDDIT GEDDIT SUN/SHADOW WHAT A SUBVERZION GENIOUS OMAE

>>87210173
>Nazis
>When Tolkien fought in WW1

>>87210360
Shit was written in 30-40s

>>87210173
orcs and nazis have nothing in common

>>87210272
But even in the spirit of shitposting, Asia is Yi Ti. He even chose the most sterotypical chinky name for it.

>>87210374
He wrote large parts of it during WW1. He was literally writing in the trenches.
He's also always denied any allegories in his work, even though there blatantly are. But Orcs were definitely not based on Nazis.

>>87210374
You are retarded

>>87210374
Orcs = Otttoman TuRKS
Uruk-Hai = Nazi Germans
Goblins = Italians

>>87209868
GRRM is shit hack, Song of Fire and Ice brings literally nothing new to fantasy genre.

>>87209868
>dude what if i make a group of nomads who rode ponies 6' 7"
genghis khan was 5' 8"

the mongols were MANLETS

>>87210603
Wasn't everyone a manlet then, especially in Asia.
Besides wouldn't being a manlet be an advantage if all your combat is on horseback? Smaller target and lighter and such

>>87210603
People used to be much smaller. Human species is getting more tall with each generation.

>>87209868
>Khan
>Khaganate
A Khan would rule a Khanate and not a Khaganate.

>>87210450
Asia isn't China to a white, non-traveling neckbeard like gurm, Asia is Nippon, who was enjoying an economic boom during the 90s when gurm was writing. Western news paid no attention to China at that time.
He thought calling his fantasy Nippon Nighon too on-the-nose so to his awareness Nippon represented fantasy Asia and got the Asshai name. Asshai even has radioactive poisoning and mutants as part of its culture due to the nukes/dragons that shit on there.

>>87210090
>GRRM just adopts out history and mythology into one "new" world of Planetos
So the exact thing Tolkien did?

>>87210497
Goblins and orcs are the same race.

>>87209868
is this guy the jewiest looking non-jew in the history of goyim?

>>87210653
>Besides wouldn't being a manlet be an advantage if all your combat is on horseback? Smaller target and lighter and such
which is why it makes no sense that they're all 6' 5" dudes who ride big HORSES

you can't supply an army made of horses, the mongols rode tiny steppe ponies
>>87210655
WRONG global average height is 5' 8"

and mongols TODAY are like 5' 6"

and game of thrones is set in the PAST

>>87210753
Game of Thrones is ficiton you deranged retard

>>87210653
>Wasn't everyone a manlet then, especially in Asia.
Fairly certain they recently crunched some numbers and found heights, at least in England, have been roughly the same for about 1000 years.

>>87210733
>Romans fucked a lot of Turkoids
Exactly autist

>>87210753
shut the fuck up redditor

>>87210791
fiction set in the medieval past
>>87210802
>roughly the same for about 1000 years
wrong they said the average height used to be 5' 7"

google it

>>87210743
I think he looks like a fucking Greek fisherman.

>>87210830
how am i a redditor you retarded newshit

>muh reddit spacing
neck yourself kid this is how i TYPE

>>87209868
And you also make them 6"5' brown muscled statues instead of 5"3' bowlegged yellow creatures.

>>87210813
Wouldn't that make them Uruk-hai?

>>87210836
2 inches shorter than the current average. With females being 1 inch shorter. Sure they were a bit shorter but not full on mantles compared to us current day people. There were a lot of tall medieval people and there were a lot of short medieval people, much like today.

File: Jason-Biggs-Getty[1].jpg (379KB, 2048x1593px) Image search: [Google]

379KB, 2048x1593px

>>87210743
That would be Jason Biggs

>>87210173
orcs are niggers you stupid kike

File: 1496664943619.jpg (32KB, 571x421px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 571x421px

>>87209868
>western continent is called westeros
>eastern continent is called essos
>southern continent is called sothoryos
>farthest continent is called ulthos

>>87210963
>2 inches shorter than the current average
5' 7" is manlet lol
>There were a lot of tall medieval people and there were a lot of short medieval people, much like today.
yeah but the mongols were a short people like they are now, because they were nomads who rode ponies

>>87210963
Uruks are first generation elf rapebabies to keep their bloodline pure.

>>87211003
Nah there are actual niggers in Middle-Earth

>>87210090
>Dude what if the War of the Roses but with magic and shit?
Ah, fuck it, it's a good read and better than what would have been had he stuck to his original plan.

>>87211008
Ulthos is straya right

>>87211008
>eastern continent is called essos
well, not directly at least
https://asearchoficeandfire.com/?q=essos&scope%5B%5D=agot&scope%5B%5D=adwd&scope%5B%5D=acok&scope%5B%5D=twow&scope%5B%5D=asos&scope%5B%5D=affc

>>87209868
A good storyteller builds the world around his story, not the story to fit the world.

>>87210968
>5' 7" is manlet lol
That's because anglos are manlets today. If they studied say northern germanic skeletons they might have been closer to 6' 0. My point is people weren't necessarily much more manlet than they are today.
>yeah but the mongols were a short people like they are now, because they were nomads who rode ponies
Fair enough.
>>87211037
Orcs are the corrupted elves, Uruks are the human-orc rape babies.

>>87211132
Wait, Essos isn't its official name? What's its real name then?

>>87211199
>If they studied say northern germanic skeletons they might have been closer to 6' 0.
keep telling yourself that

>>87211312
Nothing, since it's not unified like Westeros but instead split into city-states with loose alliances. When a Westerosi character talks about something happening in Essos, the character uses the city/landmark name instead

>>87211322
I don't really have to, I can just read it.

>>87210691
Tolkein made original ideas and an entire bible for his universe. GRRM is using real-world foundations for his world.

>>87211455
>If they studied say northern germanic skeletons they might have been closer to 6' 0.
where can you read this

>>87211554
the world wide webs

>>87211551
Tolkien relied heavily on myth and inspiration from the real world. Especially Germanic myth and stories. From names like Gandalf and Thorin Oakenshield and Mirkwood, to elves and elvish, dwarfs, continents(middle earth was legit supposed to be a 1-1 copy of Europe at some point even).

He was just a lot better at it than GRRM since he was an etymologists and scholar of Germanic and medieval texts an instead of just copying the surface level stuff he sought to elevate and expand upon ancient myths. He sort of envisioned his world as a continuation of real myth he felt England was sorely lacking , so he sort of wanted to make a British retelling of all these Germanic stories.

>>87209868
>Andal
>Vandal
Bravo grrm

>>87210090
>subverting (((tropes)))

he came about 20 yers too late with that

cool authors were already subverting the subversions in his time

>>87210691
Haha no. You have no idea what you're talking about.

>>87212270
See >>87212042

>>87212270
The fuck are you talking about? Tolkein borrowed heavily from myths.

>Lancelot
>cucks his boss king by fucking the prettiest princess of the land Guinevere

>Lancel
>cucks his boss king by fucking the prettiest princess of the land Cersei

Wtf that's not how subversion works

>>87212143
First Men = Celts
Rhoynar = Norman Gauls

Children of the Forest = Celts
First Men = Anglo-Saxons
Andals = Normans
Rhoynar = Moors

File: serveimage.jpg (25KB, 600x512px) Image search: [Google]

25KB, 600x512px

>>87212423
>Norman Gauls

>>87212543
Le Nigger Puzzler

>>87209868
>dude, what if I made a girl, but had her shit diarrhea everywhere!!!!

File: Planetos-46546546.png (40KB, 1445x766px) Image search: [Google]

40KB, 1445x766px

>>87211381
> Nothing, since it's not unified like Westeros but instead split into city-states with loose alliances.

Among maesters and educated people, the (known) continents are still called Westeros, Essos, Sothoryos and Ulthos.

File: gurms migrations.jpg (71KB, 934x198px) Image search: [Google]

71KB, 934x198px

>>87212486
forest elves were supernatural and couldn't breed with any of the men. more like celts' leprechauns.

rhoynars came in three waves, see pic rel. Martells come from the Frankish wave.

Andals are Saxons who are technically blood related to the Vandals

>>87212486
'no'

First Men are Celts
Andals are Anglos/Saxons
Targs/Valyrians are Normans
Rhoynar are Spanish

>>87212781
So there were no educated povs in the canon and neither does your map exist in vivo, Linda

>>87212871
>Andals are Anglos/Saxons

This can't be because the Andals brought knighthood and chivalry to Westeros which is what the Normans did with Britain

>Rhoynar are Spanish

Dorne is Spain and the Rhoynar are the Moors who BLACKED Spain

http://awoiaf.westeros.org/index.php/Dornishmen#Ethnicity

>>87212871
Valyrians are clearly Romans and the Valyrian lingua franca treated as Latin. Did Normans have the highest concentration of Roman blood among the survivors of the empire?

>>87213000
It's not and will never be 1:1 match, I put more weight on their physical descriptions than their cultural implications handed down from politicized and always incomplete history.

>>87210090
>Planetos
Is that what he really named his planet?

>>87213035
Other than it's an anagram no, Normans were Vikings in France not sure of what noble French lineage they may have had though.

>>87210173
your response to legitimate criticism is either 'just pretending' to be retarded or actual ignorance

>>87210090
>and subverting (((tropes))) of fantasy and fiction series.

>literal bad guy called "night king" coming with an army of zombies to literally kill all living things
>the girl with the dragons and the dude from the prophecy (including thick plot armor) have to literally fight on dragons against a zombie army in a climactic battle

WEW LAD

>>87211008
>Northern America is called North America
>Southern America is called South America
And then there's shit like the Mid West, Middle East, North/South Korea, etc.
People are lazy and have called places based on their direction for literally ever.

File: Cercei devours Robert's heirs HD.png (784KB, 2292x1667px) Image search: [Google]

784KB, 2292x1667px

>>87210203
This.

"Ten thousand of your children perished in my palm, Your Grace. Whilst you snored, I would lick your sons off my face and fingers one by one, all pale sticky princes. You claimed your rights, my lord, but in the darkness I would eat your heirs."

"Her loins ached from the urgency of his love making. It was a good ache."

"Was there ever a woman with nipples so large or so responsive? He could hardly look at them without wanting to grab them, to suckle them until they were hard and wet and shiny"

"Ser Alliser Thorne walked from the room so stiffly it looked as though he had a dagger up his butt".

"The ship groaned and growled beneath him like a constipated fat man straining to shit."

"The three men were erect. The sight of their arousal was arousing."

"She was sopping wet when he entered her. “Damn you,” she said. “Damn you damn you damn you.” He sucked her nipples till she cried out half in pain and half in pleasure. Her cunt became the world."

>"HER CUNT BECAME THE WORLD."

"And suddenly his cock was out, jutting upward from his breeches like a fat pink mast."

"Men call me Darkstar, and I am of the night."

"Sunset found her squatting in the grass, groaning. Every stool was looser than the one before, and smelled fouler. By the time the moon came up she was shitting brown water. The more she drank, the more she shat, but the more she shat, the thirstier she grew."

t. GURM

>>87213610
Watertown
Newcastle

etc.

>>87213176
IS that really worse than Westeros being the western continent, and Essos being the east, and Sothoryos being the south?

>>87210497
No, all blacks

File: purge.jpg (56KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

56KB, 1280x720px

>>87213725

>>87213734
New Zealand, New Holland, New South Wales, New Caledonia, etc etc

>>87213786
Sorry Cletus, Tolkien and 1940s England didn't have your nigger problem. Turks, wops and sandcoons were their niggers.

>>87213587
>>literal bad guy called "night king" coming with an army of zombies to literally kill all living things

The name comes from what he did though. He was the 13th Lord Commander of the Night's Watch, but went far north and found a wife for himself there, came back to the wall and declared himself the Night's King, ruled the Night's Watch that way for a while before they overthrew him. Fuck knows how the show turned that into him being created by the children of the forest though. The Night's King of the book is a completely different origin than the Night's King of the show.

>>87213752
Orient literally means East

>>87213888
uh

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=60QRkHPidQ4

>>87213919
A lot more subtler etymology than omitting one vowel or consonant tho

>Dragon named Drogon

File: coming out next week i swear.png (289KB, 980x2989px) Image search: [Google]

289KB, 980x2989px

>>87213908
>He was the 13th Lord Commander of the Night's Watch, but went far north and found a wife for himself there, came back to the wall and declared himself the Night's King, ruled the Night's Watch that way for a while before they overthrew him.

That's myth, not history.

The White Walkers will be shown to be created by the CotF in the books as well. If GURM ever gets off his fat ass and release another book before he dies.

File: Planetos-globe.jpg (275KB, 1484x1123px) Image search: [Google]

275KB, 1484x1123px

>>87212913

Are you implying that the maesters had no concept of continents?

>>87213954
I'm not clicking on your purely this decade production, Cletus. Get some perspective and realize your problems are just the problems of your time. They're fads.

File: Heavy8.jpg (32KB, 494x275px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 494x275px

>>87213587
>>the girl with the dragons

Every time I see Daenerys I'm reminded of this classic 1980 cheese movie.

>>87213888
He was ahead of his time desu

Also, they all knew about the Africa problem

>>87213725
>"The ship groaned and growled beneath him like a constipated fat man straining to shit."
>"Was there ever a woman with nipples so large or so responsive? He could hardly look at them without wanting to grab them, to suckle them until they were hard and wet and shiny"
>"The three men were erect. The sight of their arousal was arousing."
nothing wrong with these, seen worse in a James Joyce or Nabokov novel

File: Houses of Westros 02.jpg (328KB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]

328KB, 1920x1080px

Stark of the North = Romano-British / Scottish / Moscovy

Arryn of the Vale = Celtic Wales / Swiss

Tully of the Riverlands = Medieval English

Greyjoy of the Iron Islands = Viking Age Scandinavians

Lannister of the Westerlands = Renaissance Italy

Baratheon of the Stormlands = Tudor England

Tyrell of the Reach = Carolingian French

Nymeros-Martell of Dorne = Post-Reconquista Spain / Norman Sicily

Targaryen of the Crownlands = Byzantine Empire

Wildings = Roman Era Germanic tribes / N.American Indians

>>87214053
I'm implying you should train your high-powered autism onto literary comprehension.

>>87214111

So... you've got nothing.

>>87214167
I already got a link that you didn't get. Christ you're bad at this.

>>87214053
>westeros the size of the american continent

No way.

>>87214108
Wildlings are Highland Scots (The wall is Hadrian's Wall)

Greyjoys are more the western Scottish vikings but that's nitpicking

Lannisters are just England, Essos city states are Italy

Volantis is Constantinople

I've heard people say Riverlands are the Low Countries, idk about that though

>>87210173
You are one dumb motherfucker aren't you.

>>87214053
>>87214248
I always assumed Essos stretched to the size of Eurasia (like spain to china size) but actually that would make Westeros way too huge.

>>87214248
it's the size of South America IIRC

>>87211037
>>87211199
Uruk is the orc word for orc.

>>87214108
At least find where the Thames instersects with another river to pinpoint what towns the Twins and Riverrun are. You already did good putting Starks with Yorks but missing Lannisters=Lancasters. Renaissance Florence and the Medicis = Braavos and the Iron Bank/Faceless men

>>87214324
Still too big.

>>87214397
No shit. Next you'll tell me Hai is the orc word High. Which then translates to High Orc. Which coincides with their role in orcish society as the superior master race orc. Ho lee shieeet

>>87214412
Braavos seems like Amsterdam to me, though Venice works as well

>>87213725
You're focusing way too much on the stuff that's crude in terms of content when there's just as much "He placed his dirk between his teeth. The cold iron comforted him" to give him shit for.

>>87214509
It's a city full of greaseball wops, of course it's Venice with the Colossus of Rhodes as an arc and a Florentian society and everything else.

>>87210450
>>87210677
the whole essos is just tropes galore with no sensible explanations behind them
>dude tax policy lmao

>>87211003
Orcs are obviously supposed to be Turks. They also have similar names and languages.

>>87214618
Tropes come from somewhere. Imagination is overrated when its hacks doing the imagining and reality is stranger than hack fiction.

>>87212781
That map's not canon btw.

Sothoryos is so big some dragon lady flew straight for 3 years and didn't reach the other shore

File: daario_naharis_portrait_by_kittanee-d663gs9.png (658KB, 600x776px) Image search: [Google]

658KB, 600x776px

>>87214618
Not to mention his retarded OC people

>hmmm i need to show these characters as exotic and strange... i know! they'll have hair and beards in weird colors lol

>>87214414
That's because when he started writing it was the size of the UK, then he changed his mind to a much larger one

>>87213610
>north AMERICA
You absolute retard

>>87214014
WW aren't ice statues like in the show, they're more like snow elves.

>>87214108
>lannisters
Plantagenet Brits
>Targaryens
Normans
>Braavos
Venice
>Volantis
Byzantine
>Slaver's bay
Carthage

>>87214732
There are Afghani nomads that do that IRL.

>>87211551
>GRRM is using real-world foundations for his world.
He handpicked parts of real-world foundations that are close to his narrative.

The irony is that he "accuses" Tolkien of not including in his world real-life applications, even though the way he uses this real-life applications aren't even complete and are there only to satisfy his narrative.

File: 0fa84fcfa6810d62d32aa3da76f83ce6[1].jpg (562KB, 1240x1700px) Image search: [Google]

562KB, 1240x1700px

>>87214732
you called?

>yfw this was the epitome of manliness

>>87210090
>His actual talent lies in character writing and character building
Hahahahaha

No.

He has so many fucking characters that NONE of them are ever developed with any depth or subtlety.

It's ALWAYS:

Character has one outlook
>muh honor
>muh wish I was a man
>muh right of kingship
Etc.

That never changes or adapts through the story. And their background and motivations lack ANY mystery, they always just spout out their life story and ideology to the first person who asks. The author treats the audience like retards and hits them over the head with the characters.

>>87214940
These guys' wigs are still a normal color, the Tyroshi literally dye themselves like tumblr dykes

>>87213725
wait, who is Sunset?

>>87214974
>He has so many fucking characters that NONE of them are ever developed with any depth or subtlety.
I agree that most of his characters are one dimensional but you're forgetting Theon

>>87214083
Joyce was a fucking druggie, junkiy, homo degenerate and a hack, its not a high level to compete with

>>87213954

Total 1984 shit right there.

>>87214974
>Brienne of Tarth
Honourable Lady that wishes she were a man; good and meek knight loses herself to murder and becomes cynical, wishing she had some feminity after all to retire.

>Jaime Lannister
Warlord loses himself to the trappings of his own family name and arrogance; needs to make a name for himself from the ground up - turns diplomat and finds out he doesn't need to live up to his father's name

>Arya Stark
Naive tomboy wishes for an adventure and to be a spunky peasant girl - instead becomes a psychopathic and broken PTSD child soldier. Reality ensues.

>Jon Snow
Naive bastard wishes for adventure and to be a spunky ranger - instead finds out you can't please everyone; becomes more realistic and less idealistic over time, mirroring Stannis Baratheon

>Theon Greyjoy
Man caught between two families chooses one and ends up getting neither, and much, much worse, learning in the process that family is more than blood.

>Sansa Stark
Broken abuse victim trudges the path of many abuse victims and begins to become sexually broken and warped, mirroring her nemesis and beginning to realise politics often corrupts rather than corrupt people being drawn to politics.

>Tyrion Lannister
Stunted Richard III analogue tries his hand at Machiavellian scheming and loses everything because of his own self-pity, becomes bitter and suicidal, and eventually is set to start a civil war because of his own selfishness.

Should I keep going?

>>87209976
>>87210090
>>87211551
TOLKIEN*

It's not hard nigger

>>87215394
Yes, please do

>>87215394
>>Brienne of Tarth
>Big ugly woman who wishes she were prettier. Falls in love with every guy she meets.

>>Jaime Lannister
>Everyone thinks he's a bad guy but he's secretly a neutral guy.

>>Arya Stark
>Muh killer loli

>>Jon Snow
>Presumably one of the main characters. He starts out inexperienced and becomes experienced.

>>Theon Greyjoy
>Muh child of two worlds. Gets tortured and this is the author's excuse for character development.

>>Sansa Stark
>Muh naive innocent who's also tortured

>>Tyrion Lannister
>Muh nobody takes me seriously even though I'm smarter than them

>Should I keep going?
If you can sum up the characters to a T in a single paragraph, that enforces my poiny that they are one-dimensional.

But I'll give you that the characters do develop, just along narrow and simplistic arcs.

>>87215394
Not that anon and I don't want to harp on GURM but it's clear that he's a one trick pony; all he can do is subversion

>Brienne
>subversion of the idea of a woman warrior
>Jaime
>subversion of the idea of a knight in shining armor
>arya, jon, quentyn
>subversion of adventure lit
>theon
>subversion of hardcore vikings
>sansa
>subversion of romance plots
>tyrion
>subversion of power plays

etc. etc.

File: Val Wilding Princess.jpg (416KB, 1920x1200px) Image search: [Google]

416KB, 1920x1200px

>>87214254
> Wildlings are Highland Scots (The wall is Hadrian's Wall)

The Wildings are too primitive to be Scots, most are still using stone tools and only the Thenns are Bronze Age tier.

> Greyjoys are more the western Scottish vikings but that's nitpicking

The Ironborn are straight up Vikings, with the addition of a death cult.

> Lannisters are just England, Essos city states are Italy

All of Westeros is just England.

> Volantis is Constantinople

Sure but the Targaryens are the older and most advanced civilization, so for Westeros it’s accurate.

> I've heard people say Riverlands are the Low Countries, idk about that though

If anything, the Riverlands are Poland; regularly invaded by their neighbors and populated by head-strong nobles who the Tullys can barely control.

>>87210658
No, it's khaganate you historical illiterate

>>87215715
You can do that with every character

Don Quixote
>Contrarian spic who doesn't like windmills

Characters have personalities they have to stick to and arcs they need to follow. If that doesn't happen, you get the schizophrenic characters in the show adaptation.

>>87214412

It's not a one-to-one comparison, just a generalized way of categorizing the various duchies/kingdoms.

>>87210968
is a jew

>>87212596
>87212781
normandy is a frankish kingdom dumbass.

gaul was long romanized and conquered by germanic franks

>>87215804
to be fair, subversion is what sold during the 90s and is responsible for the word 'edgy' entering the vocabulary. his slowness caught up with him and what he was subverting is now the new, passé norm

File: Wise Master.jpg (26KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 640x480px

>>87214922
> >Targaryens
> Normans

No, the Targaryens are the older and more civilized culture here.

> >Slaver's bay
> Carthage

Egypt/MideEast

>>87216045
Some of the categories could use more accurate autism otherwise where's the fun

>>87214075
WON'T YOU TAKE A RIDE-RIDE-ride.... ON HEEEEAAVY METAL

>>87215967
Yeah, but in good books, characters also have hidden motivations and quirks that even they may not be aware of. They also don't rant about that time from their childhood when someone did something mean that motivates their entire existence now.

>>87215942
>The Wildings are too primitive to be Scots, most are still using stone tools and only the Thenns are Bronze Age tier.

It's based on the Roman idea of what lies beyond Hadrian's Wall, not actual medieval royal Scots

>The Ironborn are straight up Vikings, with the addition of a death cult.

Lord of the Isles used to be a Viking kingdom in Western Scotland

>All of Westeros is just England.

objectively false.

also the people of the Neck are the Irish

>United Statos of Americos
>Greatos Britainos
>Chinos

truly an auteur

>>87216226
Daenerys realises she's incompetent and bloodthirsty, Jaime realises he is more intellectual than he lets on, Arya realises she just wants a home, Tyrion realises he likes the taste of destablising power, Jon Snow realises he has always been envious of power, even from his own siblings...

The characters are fine. It's definitely his stronger suit.

>>87216339
>>Chinos
"Dockarys"

It's cool to act like even the books are shit just because the show is. You're delusional if you think the first two novels are bad, especially when compared to other genre fiction trash.

The third book is okay and the next two are legitimately awful though.

>>87209868
>It's not Edward, it's Eddard.
>It's not Walter, it's Walder.
>It's not Jeffrey, it's Joffrey.
>It's not dragon, it's Drogon.
>It's not Leon, it's Theon.
>It's not Samuel, it's Samwell.
>It's not Peter, it's Petyr.
>It's not Thomas, it's Tommen.
>It's not Sir, it's Ser.
>It's not Roderick, it's Podrick.
>It's not Lisa, it's Lysa.
>it's not hold the door, it's Hodor.
>It's not Khan, it's Khal.

Thanks for helping add to the list.

>>87210802
Is that why Edward Longshanks at 6" was considered literal GIANT in his time, warranting that byame?

File: Wall.png (327KB, 1187x1144px) Image search: [Google]

327KB, 1187x1144px

>>87216289
> >The Wildings are too primitive to be Scots, most are still using stone tools and only the Thenns are Bronze Age tier.
> It's based on the Roman idea of what lies beyond Hadrian's Wall, not actual medieval royal Scots

Which is why I said Roman era Germanic tribes / American Indians.

The Roman Limes Germanicus was far more extensive and heavily manned then Hadrian’s Wall and the krautniggers were far more of a threat.

> >The Ironborn are straight up Vikings, with the addition of a death cult.
> Lord of the Isles used to be a Viking kingdom in Western Scotland

Sure, but the culture of the Ironborn is straight up Viking raiders and while they farm, fish and mine nowadays, it’s only because the Targaryens forced them to.

> >All of Westeros is just England.
> objectively false.

Do you even books? Clearly Westeros is an blatantly obvious analog for Britain, it’s obvious throughout the story.

>>87215967
>that description
Nigger, I haven't even read Don Quixote and I know you are fucking wrong.

>>87213725
>"The three men were erect. The sight of their arousal was arousing."

bonerception

>>87216640
That's the joke you autist.

>>87216289
its literally britain and ireland upside-down and connected to each other at a different point. He literally took a country puzzle and just arranged some preexisting countries into a "new" one.

File: screenshot-www.google.com-2017-09-02-14-04-21.png (371KB, 1266x666px) Image search: [Google]

371KB, 1266x666px

>>87216595

>>87216629
>>87216685
Reach is France, Dorne is Spain, etc.

>>87210574
realism

>>87210655
Humans were about as tall as modern humans before agriculture came about then became manlets and slowly grew larger again.

>>87210655
>>87216803
>>87216595
>>87210653
what the fuck guys
who is teaching you history that they're letting you believe everyone was 4'6" cause human height has remained relatively unchanged for millions of years and has swayed by most 1.2 inches on average

>>87214254
>Volantis is Constantinople
Quarth is Constantinople. Volantis is just a generic post-Roman city state.

File: Khazar.jpg (21KB, 326x355px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 326x355px

Dothraki could have had expertly crafted armor and weapons like actuall steppe cultures like Mongols, Cumans, Scythians

instead...
>lmao nah grass skirts and bronze-age farming tools. XDD
>lmao BIG scary barbarian guy XDDD
>lmao white beple btfoed XDDD

what did D&D mean by this ?

>>87216921
Doesn't Volantis have giant walls like Constantinople? Also it's where all the noble Valyrians who survived the Doom are

>>87216932
hush, the Khazars never existed goy

>>87216932
>>87216932
If they were Khazars they would also need to be much whiter, not even GRRM wanted them to be Khazars.

>>87217021
They are pretty well documented, but probably less Jewish than their made out to be
>>87217047
They were Turkic not white

>>87217071
History documents the Khazar empire as having dark people and fair haired people with ginger hair.

>>87217127
maybe, they probably took a lot of Slavic concubines. They were undeniably a Turkic people though

File: Dothraki.jpg (160KB, 1024x768px) Image search: [Google]

160KB, 1024x768px

>>87216932

GRRM overstates the threat of the Dothraki, who are essentially N.American Plains Indians and thus incapable of sacking cities and defeating professional heavily armored nation-state armies.

File: 1503933588439.jpg (2MB, 1800x1800px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 1800x1800px

>>87213000
Moors were berbers and berbers are not black

>>87209976
This is the biggest hang-up for me, because it just looks like a spelling error repeated constantly

>>87217168
yet even bobby B seems to be shitting himself over these unarmored screaming idiots for some unfounded reason

>>87212818
>>87212818
CotF could breed with humans.

>>87216179
I meant in the sense of "foreign culture invades and set themselves up as kings"

>>87213000
>the Moors who BLACKED Spain
This meme won't ever get old, will it?

>>87217181
This same thing happens to me with Jaime's name. He spells it Jaime ("Hi-meh"), a Spanish name, instead of Jamie, which is how it's pronounced.

>>87209868
All of westeros is pulled from medieval feudalism culture. Why is that okay, but having the dothraki be pulled from mongolian nomads isn't?

>>87216588
notLancelot, it's Lancel
notCirce, it's Cersei
notJames, it's Jaime
notKevin, it's Kevan
notLancaster, it's Lannister
notMalibu beachfront property, it's Casterly Rock
notMiss Universe, it's Queen of Love and Beauty
notIsle of Man, it's Isle of Faces

>>87216588
To add to this
>not Jamie, it's Jaime
>not Rick, it's Rickon
>not Robin, it's Robyn

>>87217315
Not completely sure where the Moors=Black meme came from. Maybe it's because Othello, "the Moor of Venice" is black, and for Americans/Brits that's our only reference for the world Moor.

>>87217364
Othello wasn't nigger black that's just modern cuck thinking

>>87217281

Ok sure, and as I said up-thread, all these comparison are general in nature, not one-to-one mirror images.

>>87217364
I was talking more about the "le rapebabies" meme

>>87217252
Nah, it's folklore. Osha also says Hodor is descended from giants. All that means is Osha holds that belief. Maybe not even since she was bantering.

>>87217441
where do you think greensight and warging comes from?

File: jaime lannister.jpg (26KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 480x360px

>>87217322
>This same thing happens to me with Jaime's name.

Seriously, it’s the gayest name in fantasy literature.

He should have been named Cyrion or Cywin or something masculine.

>>87217470
From the Updog

>>87217510

What's Updog?

>>87217470
why do you think it's blood, when it's clearly said in the books it's a teachable technique. i bet your grandma used to listen to radio back in the day, that must mean one of your ancestors fucked Marconi. it's the only way to access radio waves.

>>87217597
>why do you think it's blood, when it's clearly said in the books it's a teachable technique

It's only teachable to those who HAVE the blood.

As Bloodraven says
>only one in a thousand is a warg, and only one in a thousand wargs is a greenseer

Pls stop comparing high fantasy to low fantasy.

>>87217545
Nothing much, how are you?

File: Children of the Forest.jpg (247KB, 1570x884px) Image search: [Google]

247KB, 1570x884px

>>87217597
>why do you think it's blood, when it's clearly said in the books it's a teachable technique.

No, it's genetic, the result of First Men breeding with the Children of the Forest.

>>87217640
so? where is the logical leap that says only one in a thousand fucked leprechauns? the assumption you make is how folklore is made, my bastard of Marcon.

File: 1334270206108.jpg (43KB, 604x453px) Image search: [Google]

43KB, 604x453px

>>87217651

>>87217710
t. elf supremacist

>>87217724
the Reeds are clearly of CotF lineage

File: QT of the Forest..png (1MB, 1057x793px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1057x793px

>>87217751
> implying you wouldn't

>>87217757
nope. they're clearly fenwalking, bogeating irish celts. do they fuck leprechauns? depends who you ask.

File: 1502186908591.webm (2MB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 640x480px

What if i called North... "the north"?!

>>87217829
>extinct
elfboos must be suffering

>>87217866
What the fuck goes on in that webm

>>87217911
chinese space program

>>87217866
explain

>>87217866
ill never get tired the way he comically pops his head up right before

>>87211008
>several lands united under a king is called the united kingdom

>>87217911
methane

>>87217441
Except thats wrong. Canonically Meera and Jojens people are hybrids which explains their short stature and magic.
IIRC One of the Hightowers got a CotF pregnant but she died during childbirth

File: caesarhorsebackparade.png (620KB, 853x480px) Image search: [Google]

620KB, 853x480px

>>87216932
>what did D&D mean by this ?
That HBO are lost for non-SJW.
Also, speaking about HBO, whoi would won Daynarys army vs picrelated

>>87218020
Nah. You're obviously an elf fucker trying to normalize fae fucking.by clinging to every bit of hearsay, gossip and old nan tales and presenting it as geneology.

>>87217937
topkek

>>87218020
>Hightowers
>have a High Tower

but srsly they're a based house

>>87214053
jesus christ now just imagine everyone teleporting around in westeros in one episode

>Oldtown
>started as a ford where oxen crossed
>eventually became old
fucking hack

>>87213725
If Cersei hated Robert so much why would she eat his sperm? Obviously she has to get him off somehow other than in her puss to avoid having his children, but once he blows why not just wipe it off?

Also, that's a good line, so is good ache, cunt world, and fat pink mast. The diarrhea stuff is gross but guess what - so is diarrhea.

>>87218258
>>started as a ford where oxen crossed

Is this serious?

File: 1469606758879.jpg (180KB, 1254x688px) Image search: [Google]

180KB, 1254x688px

>>87218332
>Also, that's a good line

>>87210173
Orcs are obviously sub-Saharan black Africans such as Bantus. Dwarves are obviously ashkenazi jews.
Gollum is also a jew. The hobbits are Picts. The elves are our Nordic supermen Demi-god superiors. Etc

>>87218332
She didn't. She was being melodramatic and bantering

>>87209868
This is hack

>>87209976
this is brilliant

>>87216588
>Samwell
it is a real name.

>>87210173
>NAZIS
ww1. oh my god. fucking americans

>>87218875
>It's not Samwise Gamgee, it's Samwell Tarly!

>>87210497
i dont think orcs are turks. they are more like germans. both common sense and geographical.

turks could be eastern humans who fight together with orcs

File: Stannis_S05E09.png (223KB, 350x456px) Image search: [Google]

223KB, 350x456px

>BRO WHAT IF I MAKE A CARBON COPY OF MACBETH BUT CALL HIM STANNIS INSTEAD OF MACBETH??

>>87218921
Who gives a fuck about WW1? We won it in loke 7 months.WW2 was the real war and obviously harder because it took us longer to beat the Germans that tine

>>87219194
He's Richard the Third though and Cersei is Lady MacBeth

>>87219194
>>87219300
Oh and GRRM has said he's influenced by Tiberius as well

>>87218988
>i dont think orcs are turks.
>orcs kidnap elves and corrupt them to turn more orcs=Turks kidnapping Christian boys and turningbthem Janissaries

>>87210497
>>87218988
>>87219593
tolkein hated metaphors and allegories, the orcs are just fictional savage beasts and nothing else

>>87220126
Yet there's a clear anti-industrial allegory

>>87220126
yeah eagles aren't the unitedstate's late entry into the war and i fucked my boss' daughter i'll be sure to admit to that when he asks me. don't be so gullible faggot, tolkien isn't even paying you to spokesman for him

>>87220220
except not, tolkein thought people who tried to interpret his books and apply them to the real world were idiots through and through

>>87220272
i also use that line whenever i don't want my tumblr fanfic negatively criticised. it's just a chldren's story, dear parents, buy my books

>>87220347
tolkien is dead and he didn't live long enough to learn about the internet

Sothoryos is just Africa, right?

>>87220427
both literary criticism and the business of publishing predated the internet, predated tolkien as well. i can see you're not really good at metaphors which explains your post

>>87220530
It's Africa+South America when it was still one continent

File: file.png (304KB, 500x600px) Image search: [Google]

304KB, 500x600px

really makes you think

>>87217230
>for some unfounded reason
They can kill the peasant that are not behind walls and got scared that the kingdoms would turn on him.

File: file.png (46KB, 628x181px) Image search: [Google]

46KB, 628x181px

>>87220543

>>87212042
>german
Most of LotR is based on Finnish myth from the Kalevala. Fucking krauts trying to steal culture and ruin Europe again.

>>87220851
Again, what's your point? Lrn2nuance faggot, no one is disputing your report that tolkien doesn't like being interpreted. What everyone's saying is you're the only faggot here prohibiting everyone else from interpreting tolkien like you were his nanny, in a thread about mocking hacky interpretations.

File: A4A59590-3D73-4FE9-A4C8-0B7D3F8F3B37-673-000001561B41E6EA.gif (991KB, 233x369px) Image search: [Google]

991KB, 233x369px

>>87218921
Once you throw out one bottom-line truth about the world (i.e., there are real and important differences between races that are hardcoded in our genetics and can not be changed by environmental forces) then you can start being really loose with other ones (i.e. Tolkien was talking bout Nazis).

>>87220994
the books aren't meant to be interpreted as anything other than a fictional story about fictional events

>>87221103
>fictional story about fictional events
>entire series is basically an allegory for world war 1
who gives a shit what tolkien said, he can't stop people from interpreting his shit

>>87221103
all narrative is interpretation. your given quote even makes mention of how tolkien thinks of history's intrinsic value as a narrative.

>>87221189
people see them as ww1 because during that time the nazis were the definition of evil on the allied side so he drew inspiration from that, if he had written the books today the evil forces would've been inspired by the alt-right

>>87217364
It came from American "black nationalists" claiming they were moors because they are mixed black/white with no racial identity.

>>87210968
Correct, Woody Allen cast Biggs after seeing American pie. Sitting down on set he asked Biggs what his plans for Rosh shashonah were. Biggs responded that he didn't know what Allen was talking about, and then explained he was a Roman Catholic. Woody Allen was upset and shocked that he accidentally cast an Italian goy instead of a Jew.

>>87221300
but the moors were arabs, specifically muslim arabs

>>87217364
Spanish people have always called them niggers out of spite

>Myr=Moor
he doesn't even try to be clever about it

>>87222222
>>87222222

>>87222286
'no'

>Chaos = Ladder
>Begins = Ants

File: freddo.png (1MB, 967x891px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 967x891px

>>87209976
>>87210090
Tolkien was a professor who's work re-established interest into the saxons language and history which in turn brought about new discoveries and understanding about both old and new England

This guy is some fat american cunt who's work will be forgotten ten years after he finishes it (or dies, which seems increasing more likely).

File: House Farwynd of the Lonely Light.png (444KB, 749x1047px) Image search: [Google]

444KB, 749x1047px

>>87220611
> > Sothoryos is just Africa, right?
> It's Africa+South America when it was still one continent

No, Sothoryos is Africa but it's implied that there is another continent to the west of Westeros.

>>87217364
The Almoravid Caliphate of North Western Africa, which invaded the Iberian Peninsula, conquered Sudanese and Nubians and brought them in migratory fashion (both civilians and levied soldiers) to the old Visigoth holdings. That's why Moors are black, or at least shades of black and brown compared to Western Europeans. Iberia is and has been a place of racial mixing and cultural heterogeneity.

>>87225789
Is it named Implyros?

File: berbers.jpg (142KB, 750x499px) Image search: [Google]

142KB, 750x499px

>>87221452
>but the moors were arabs, specifically muslim arabs

Moors are not Arab, they're native Berbers who adopted Islam.

>>87217340
>notMalibu beachfront property, it's Casterly Rock
Kek

>Plebeians still think Tolkien is good


I laugh. It's time to grow up, children.

The light side good guys versus the dark bad ugly guys is the most boring played out conflict in the history of storytelling.

File: 654654654.jpg (146KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

146KB, 1280x720px

>>87225852

No, Americos.

File: we-wuz-almoravid-ghazi-an-putamadre.jpg (147KB, 658x1075px) Image search: [Google]

147KB, 658x1075px

>>87225839
forgot pic

>>87225960
I like GRRM and Tolkein, but people saying they're similar or that GRRM is the next Tolkein are retarded. Maybe in terms of influence but not style or even prose.

>>87225985
Not all were black tho. It's not as bad as other we wuz claims by black nationalists.

>>87225839
>Iberia is and has been a place of racial mixing and cultural heterogeneity.
Don Pelayo and company weren't racially mixed.

>>87225980
Should be callled Leifericos then

>>87226099
You're correct. I didn't say everybody was in Iberia. It's a border land between two different regions/cultures/races. Hence heterogeneity.