Archived threads in /tv/ - Television & Film - 5703. page

What piece of garbage of a movie. The dialogue is just pretentious drivel, the fighting scenes are unrealistic and the story makes no sense. I piss in the face of anyone who actually liked this movie. The one thing that was actually good is the scenery and the camerawork. The movie is actually better if you mute it.

>>82854485
Don't you ever talk shit about Bell and his wife, you fucking moron.

>>82854543
There's nothing wrong with the dialogue. The monologues though...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Krr8mH-_Bmk

>>82854412
>not posting the god tier comfy soap neighbours.
And you expect anyone to take you seriously, baka senpai.

>>82854412
I haven't watch free to air in years.

All Bogans can comprehend a tv shows based around Food, Shelter and Sex.

are you shilling your own movie faggot?

fuck off

sage

>>82854450
If I made a movie it wouldn't be about fantasy shit.

>>82854494
>if

you wouldn't make a movie at all. fuck off.

>entire senate starts laughing.

He was a sith lord XD
Edit: Thanks for the gold.

>>82854124
So one person?

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>>82854024
Damn they look like your typical chavs. Girls who look like this cant be groomed by Pakis

>>82854074
where is your white gf?

>>82854024
>trafficked by British Pakistani men

the term is "asian gangs," bigot

Actual teens with attitude would have just robbed them and used the giant robots to get laid

>>82854046
I guess you're not wrong

>>82854011
the actual line in the episode was "bring me five overbearing and overemotional humans"

XD PEDOS LMAO

She's a qt.

>>82853919
How did Chris Evans become such a cuck?

first post

this is gonna be a gnarly thread

and i'm ready

>>82853835
>I have taste

The Thing (1982) or Hot Fuzz

>>82853787
implying depp wanted to be a serious actor like Bill wanted to be considered a serious actor. i think its clear it was all just a pay check to depp so he could indulge into degeneracy.

>>82853787
>he's
*his

DUDE LMAO

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>Find out she re-married
>Nonexistentcuckfather.jpg
>Find out douchebag won't go after slave drivers
>Find your mother, who is basically a Mary stand-in with the whole miraculous birth in a sandy area with a son destined to bring peace to the world, is tied up.
>She was raped and murdered
>Kill a group of outlaws(Which they were, because slavery was illegal yet the Jedi didn't enforce this when they finally came here)
>NOW Yoda senses a "disturbance in the force", but not when the slaves are killed/murdered
>Grow even closer with your wife because she actually understands the whole "Killing bad people doesn't make you bad" thing.
>Be trained and told that you are the greatest thing since sliced bread
>Decide to test it out against Count Dooku
>Robo-hand instead
>Shit
>Then, off camera during the clone wars, get an apprentice, apprentice shows promise. Jedi Council turns on her. Distinguish yourself during the clone wars, winning many battles, inspiring morale, and having a harsh but fair sense of justice.
>Oh and now the most powerful beings in the galaxy now have a completely disposable army of super soldiers.
>Whatever.jpg
>Go with master to fight the deadliest enemy the galaxy has, Count Dooku, who is supposedly the greatest swordsman and also the only reason there is really a war
>lol
>Beat him after your master who "specializes in Sith lords" gets BTFO in the first 2 minutes
>Guy who is in charge of justice in the galaxy says kill the dude
>Jedi don't want it
>Jedi don't supersede law
>doit.gif
>Refuse to leave your master for dead
>Save senator
>Wife announces she is pregnant
>On course for Jedi master rank, and that was before you saved the star of galactic politics
>Feelsgood.jpg
>Get denied promotion because one guy doesn't trust you, even though most do
>Start having dreams of wife dying
>One of the most charismatic guys in the universe starts to tell you about how to save the ones you love
>Consider it

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>He tells you the Jedi will try to steal power
>Tells you he is a sith
>Tell the guy who thinks you're a liar or unstable
>Still doesn't trust you
>Takes four jedi masters
>They all get rekt
>Palpatine plays with Windu, in an attempt to get you in too deep
>So the guy who says the Jedi will be trying to take over is then held at sword point by a guy saying he is too dangerous to stand trial...
>Because he would win that trial
>Cut his hand off, in an attempt to stop him
>not a big deal seeing as losing a hand is like a 2 day fix in this world
>Sith lord kills him
>in too deep
>Decide to go all in on Jedi after thinking they're struggling for power
>Go to Jedi Temple
>1v30 some Jedi
>Wipe out "younglings"(Read: Super Mutants being trained to be emotionless tools of an ancient religion)
>Plan to rule galaxy, which isn't a bad idea seeing as your a De Facto King by your marriage
>Plan to kill evil old guy
>Go wipe out evil robot lords who had been killing legions of your men and innocents
>Wife shows up
>There are literally two guys in the galaxy strong enough to kill you.
>She brings one on her ship
>Also gives you the "its not me, its you talk"
>Suspicious
>Obi Wan comes out and gives the generic talk guys who cheat with married women give "its her/your fault, i'm just a #bro, etc"
>ANGERY.jpg
>Lightly force choke wife, know she is OK
>Fight him
>Almost beat the most powerful Jedi in the galaxy, all while he is trained in a super defensive style and you're trained in an overly aggressive style
>Overestimate self, as most 23 year olds do
>Get your legs, and arm, cut off
>Be literally burning alive
>Overwhelming pain
>Master decides to let you suffer because he can't manage to kill you
>Be rescued by Emperor
>Kept alive though whole operation to increase pain
>No longer human, basically just a giant robot with a brain that has a built in weakness to your masters main tool
>Slave again
>Ask where wife is
>Emperor says you killed her
>Nooooooooo
>Must be true
>End Part 3

>Spend the next 20 years becoming a total badass, wiping out countless Jedi
>All the while trying to bring relative peace
>How many major wars are there during 20 years of Empire? 1 at the very end, and some minor insurrections
>Not a war that lasts 14 years like the Clone Wars
>Find out royal family is hiding rebellion assets to kill what are basically 1.1 million marines
>See her leave the ship that did it
>Still denies it
>Guy who burned and mutilated you, along with essentially causing you to be angry enough to kill your wife is on the ship
>Get nervous and say like 4 different "cool things"
>Cringe internally
>Kill him anyway
>Don't even get any satisfaction as he disappears
>Find out you have a son
>A groundbreaking realization to you, starting to realize your master lies more and more often
>Plan to overthrow evil sith and rule galaxy with him
>Find out he has been living with your step brother on a planet you have been trying to get away from your whole life
>Time is a flat circle.jpg
>Basically works as a slave for you stepbrother
>Invite your son to join you
>He has been indoctrinated by ancient religion and is now an extremist
>Start to realize he may be right
>"Are we the bad guys?"
>Realize this, talk to son
>Know he is right, but its too late to be the chosen one.
>No way to bring peace how Jedi wanted it, only the way Anakin wants it
>"It is... Too late for me, son."
>Fight son second time, he is now better than you
>Realize you also have a daughter
>Emperor starts to BBQ your boy
>Know that to intervene means certain death, and the end of the Sith line and all your worked for

BANE?

Kino!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LaVIIoRKBlk

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>>82853495

>>82853202
This was one of the most infuriating movies I've ever been memed into watching.

There's no reason OP. It's a shitty ending to a shitty movie. That's all.

>>82853247
The best scene in the movie for me was when he killed the fuck outta that girl for touching his hat

>>82853247
This. I've never been so disappointed in a fucking movie. It devolves into an interesting horror movie concept, into like, just fucking pretentious bullshit. Forgot this shit even existed.

swaglord and his band of /v/edditors won

>>82853225
Who is swaglord?

Refn was always fucking shit

>>82852979
>Executive #1: Hey Bob, our surveys say that the audience liked the way Dave Bautista laughed in Guardians of the Galaxy
>Executive #2: Let's have him laugh every 10 minutes in Guardians of the Galaxy 2 then
>Executive #1: Great thinking Bob! What else?
>Executive #2: Well that audience research we paid $100k for just came back - says people tend to be sympathetic toward babies
>Executive #1: How about a 20 minute dancing sequence with Baby Groot?
>Executive #2: Genius! That's why you get paid the big bucks!

>>82852979

Plot twist. His daughter is alive and working for Thanos.

>>82853407
He doesnt actually have a daughter though, the whole thing is meant to be a metaphor, which is then ironic because he doesnt understand metaphors, so it is an ironic metaphor. He never had a daughter, it was a reference to his innocence, which is gone, replaced by the companionship h finds in the group. It's all in the comics.

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I want a dafne

>>82852892
The normies on reddit are going crazy over this.

>>82852892
Why is she so cute bros