Bad Airport Experiences

>>1092821
Sounds like TSA. Those people get angry at passengers when they break the rules because all those cameras in the check point are actually watching the employees, not the passengers.

If the cameras catches an employee skipping a step of the procedure or doing it wrong they can be fired on the spot.

Still, they shouldn't treat people like cattle.

>>1092821
What so the little hand wipes do? I have only encountered it in the Prague airport when my metal boots kept setting off the security machine. They wiped my hands and the inside of my carry on bag then just threw it away.

>>1092904
The wipes are supposed to catch any microscopic explosive material residue and the machine they place the wipes into scans for the materials.

The problem is that some of the explosive material the machine scans for are also found in gardening, landscaping or bullets.

>>1092909
Drugs are the main thing they detect, since nobody actually tries to blow up planes. It's really incredible technology, how sensitive it is.

OP sounds like an asshole with no regard for the people in line behind him.

>>1092918
Drugs don't blow people up so no, they don't look for drugs.

>Never had a problem with police officers
>Never had a problem with airport security
>Never had a problem with any sort of law enforcement of any kind

It's all about actually doing what you're told. Smile, be polite, act a bit dumb and confused, be friendly.

>I've smuggled drugs on flights and done other illegal things that have put me in the vicinity of cops, and never been questioned

>>1092909
>>1092918
>>1092923
Fug, I was lucky I own a gun shop and I regularly shoot around 500rds a week. Its a miracle there wasnt anything picked up inside my bag

>>1092934
pretty much this. have never tried to bring any drugs into a flight though, but from past experience i guess it wouldn't be super hard.

File: 1418346723933.jpg (90KB, 500x710px) Image search: [Google]

90KB, 500x710px

>coming back from some time in afghanistan, in uniform and everything
>fucking TSA stops me and says "sir we need to check your hands for gunpowder or explosive residue"
>of course the dumb faggots find some and call in their supervisor who promptly chews them out for being so retarded
>mfw

>>1092970
Lol. It's my understanding that they get paid very little in those jobs and as such a lot of them are idiots who can't find better employment.

my worst airport experience of the past 3 years i've been flying relatively frequently:
>get through security, 30 minutes to flight
>go to shop to get a drink and snack
>look at board
>"flight boarding"
>and it happens to be at THE furthest away gate
>not a big airport, but still a 10 minute walk
>start running
>get about 100m and trip over some steps because the ramp was busy
>spend the next 13 hours travelling with my knee covered in blood

Give a small minded imbecile a small amount of power and they'll lord it over everyone.

Give a small minded imbecile a large amount of power and they'll become a completely intolerable asshole, devoid of all reasoning ability.

See: cops, security, TSA, etc.

>>1092970
I was a combat engineer for 9 years. The first time they swabbed me I was in civis. I asked them what it was and when they told me they were checking for explosive residues I may have gotten too excited and said

" oh let's play a game, I will guess all the things you will find and you tell me how many I get"

I got a bunch correct including comp b, RDX, TNT, PETN and gun powder, cordite. Blah blah

They seemed shocked for a bit but when I told them I was a a combat engineer in the military and showed my ID. They didn't even call a supervisor, they just let me on my merry way. Maybe that's just CATSA. But its also happened to me going into the US, no issues. Shitty to hear, but it sounds like you brought some of it on yourself.

>>1093028
Oh, the shitty times and the "you brought it on yourself" thing was for OP.

>>1092909
>The problem is that some of the explosive material the machine scans for are also found in gardening, landscaping or bullets
And boot polish and a lot of cleaning products.

Basically, nitrates, ammonia...anything you can make explosives out of or which is chemically similar to something you can make explosives out of.

Lots of false positives.

>>1092934
>Smile, be polite, act a bit dumb and confused, be friendly
I'd add 'be bored' to that list but it's a good list.

Boredom and stupidity and a blank expression 'wat' will get you out of a lot of trouble, often before you're in it.

>>1093048
The machines often glitch and give false positives even when you insert a clean swab.

The person in congress who approved the TSA machines used to be the CEO of the company that makes them.

File: 1436187752446.jpg (76KB, 800x582px) Image search: [Google]

76KB, 800x582px

>be American
>spend my whole life thinking China is some oppressive Communist police state hellhole
>transiting through
>figure their customs, immigration, and security is going to be hell
>"Oh boy, here we go!"
>everyone is laid back and chill
>no naked body scanning machines
>didn't even have to take off my shows
>going through security took like 5 minutes
Everything I know is a lie.

>>1093293
why would they have any incentive to make it difficult for you some affluent westerner? They take the Oigheurs in to a room with no cctv

>>1093293
>be me in china
>put fuck huge Nikon camera in my pocket for my friend while he goes and shits
>walk up to security
>didnt realize phone was there
>chink qt pants me down
>squeezes camera
>looks at me
>smiles
>waves me through

Completely oppressive.

>>1092821
>>say back "well sorry you have to work a shitty job here cause you couldn't do well in school"
You sound quite stupid yourself.

>>1092944
>Fug, I was lucky I own a gun shop and I regularly shoot around 500rds a week. Its a miracle there wasnt anything picked up inside my bag
Lies.

>>1092977
>Lol. It's my understanding that they get paid very little in those jobs and as such a lot of them are idiots who can't find better employment.
Their salaries are public information, as are all government jobs. Average is 45k. Some airports pay more, due to cost of living for the town, or living wage ordinances that increase airport pay to ensure low turnover, which in turn increases security.
50-95k in D.C.
https://www.usajobs.gov/JobSearch/Search/GetResults?Keyword=tsa

>>1093293
>>spend my whole life thinking China is some oppressive Communist police state hellhole
Well, they shoot family dogs on the doorstep, going door to door, in case of rabies.
http://www.cnn.com/2014/09/08/world/asia/china-dogs-rabies/

>>1093286
lol fuckinh america

>in Brussels at the airport
>suddenly, a suicide bomber
>holiday ruined

one time I was in brussels and some muslim blew me up
classic airport experience

>traveling through belgium
>stopover in brussels for 3 days
>go to collect my baggage
>"sorry sir your bags have been blown up along with the rest of the terminal"
>this is the 3rd time this week
errytime

>Travelling through europe
>See Netherlands, Germany, Italy and last stop is Belgium.
>Tired
>Can't wait to go home.
>Checked in
>Waiting for them to call us
>BOOM!
>BOOM!
>Fucking shit
>have to wait for an undetermined time in Belgium
>fml

>be me
>be in airport
>be 22
>see hot blonde chick with tight yoga pants
>dick super hard
>can't control myself
>don't want to fap in the bathroom because don't want people to know
>she beds over to place bags for check-in
>dick is diamonds
>get a glimpse of her reverse camel toe
>dick sky rocketing
>they call us in to get in
>she sits a few rows ahead of me
>can still see her head
>see her silky blonde hair
>dick about to false start
>plane takes off
>vibration making me pre-cum in pants.
>getting a little nervous and embarrassed
>plane is stable now
>she ties her hair in a bun
>one of my favourite styles on woman
>can feel some wet spots in my boxers
>no choice but to go to toilet
>before going enjoy a little bit more of her beautiful hair
>go to bathroom
>pull pants down, see some wet marks
>fap at 36,000 feet above ground level
>greatest fap I've ever had
>come back and enjoy in the after glow(cuddling) and just look at her while I drift off to sleep
>New member: joined mile high club
>feels good
>inb4 that's not what mile high club is
>K, joined half a mile high club
>feels good

>>1093699
you're supposed to make jokes about Brussels in this tread you dipshit

>>1093293
Only the US makes you take your shoes off

/int/ and /pol/ containment thread.

>>1093456
sounds like you had a blast

>>1093712
He said he was 22, not 16.

>>1092821
>Bad Airport Experiences
Frankfurt

>Istanbul
>get to airport more than 2 hours early
>go to checkin as soon as it opens
>guy tells us they have "an issue" and we should come back in 1 hour
>go outside of the "security zone" to grab a snack
>on the way back, a bored security guy at the scanner has me unpack the whole tent because of "unknown metal sharp objects in the backpack" the fucker
>get back to checkin
>sorry we're overbooked
>"but we were here 1 hour ago"
>well... (as foreign students you're shit to me)
>go to the complaints office
>a turkish lady is screaming at the staff
>gets so into it she accidentally drops her 3 year old son from the hands
>eventually get through all the screaming
>the staff is super pissed and incompetent
>basically have to find our own connecting flight and scream at them for them to process our tickets in time before flight
>they intentionally go slow
>they tell a lady with a small baby that she'll be staying over night, while her husband wasn't overbooked
>only give her a ticket after she breaks down crying
>two polish qt friends are told they'll be sent to different hotels and only refunded part of the price
>one pregnant lady has to run through half the airport to catch the connecting flight

We got super late to Sarajevo, but the guys there were extremely nice and just rushed us past all security and checks directly to the plane that was about to take off, then the ground crew delayed the flight so they could transfer our baggage.

>work for legoland
>installing models in another country so bringing last minute bags of parts in my travel bags
>medium size bag of blue transparent pieces
>guy thinks it's drugs at first and realized its lego
>never asks me why I have it and continues to look super confused

It's always a good time.

>>1092934
This, plus a bit of luck.

Over my life, I've 'smuggled' probably 2 kilos worth of weed and occasional small quantities of other minor drugs (E, dried peyote, shrooms) over the border and a few domestic flights... Mind you, that was in my teens/20s, and I haven't done that in several years as I feel it's not worth it nowadays... but never been caught, even when cops were around and questioning people near me, etc. Dress well, act calm and slightly disinterested, be polite but a little reserved. Hope there are no sniffer dogs around...

>>1093789

+1

>>1095254
>Dress well, act calm and slightly disinterested, be polite but a little reserved.

Good. For me this is normal.

>>1095253
I'm jelly as fuck.

>Ben Gurion airport
>Take taxi, totally misjudge time, get there three hours before flight
>Security at perimeter pulls taxi over, asks for tickets
>Yelling between driver and teenage guards with rifles
>"They want to know why you are so early"
>Early because I heard security here were cunts so you had to be early
>Might not tell them that
>Get taken into a concrete box where they search, swab and scan my luggage
>Get quizzed on who I met, asked for business cards and contact details, have to justify whole trip
>Leave the concrete box, teenagers with rifles searching the taxi, including under the hood, under the car
>Finally allowed through, tip the taxi driver for the hassle
>Ben Gurion is shit, not even a decent place to eat
>Bags searched, swabbed and scanned twice more before I leave
>MFW I'm a slightly overweight white suit-wearing consultant
Fuck those guys - I had enjoyed the trip until then.

every time is a bad experience.
all that security theatre pisses me off to no end.
i mean i was like checked once for drugs/explosives with that wipe thingy, i don't even care about that...
i just hate in general how airlines spend all that money on security, when it's proven that it doesn't work. planes don't blow up cause people don't want to blow them up in general, not because of all the incompetent security staff, and so i'm genuinely pissed i have to go through security every single time.

>>1095401
>airlines spend all that money on security
It really has nothing to do with the airlines, and everything to do with the government. You're right though - a lot of airport security is a waste of time.

>>1093456
well that holiday was just bursting with energy

File: 1414605910349 (2015_09_18 12_40_44 UTC).jpg (104KB, 576x720px) Image search: [Google]

104KB, 576x720px

>>1092821
>tfw leaving from Brussels Airport this Thursday
dis gun be bad isn't it

they're setting up check-in desks in a DHL warehouse right now kek

Don't feel like starting a new thread and this one seems appropriate.
I'm flying to Munich in June. My plane lands at 8:30am and my train leaves the HBF at 10:55am. Originally this was enough time but then the Brussels bombings happened. Will security delays be an issue?

>>1095493
Security is never an issue getting off the plane. Also, no one has done airport-style security for trains yet, so you should be fine. The train from one to the other is about 45 minutes.

>>1093789
+2

>>1095403
you're right. i got carried away there, my point went through luckily.

>>1095528
Good. I've never been on a train so I didn't know if there would be airport type security checks there.

>>1095493
You'll be fine. Should be out of the airport with your luggage in 30-45 minutes if things are moving slow. Probably faster. Still gives you time to get to the main train station, and perhaps 30ish minutes to kill. Munich HBF looks like shit, btw, but you'll be fine.

>>1095614
>I've never been on a train
... I don't even ... wut?

>>1095616
I'm from Michigan so I've never had the need to use a train. Hell I've never used public transport except for a taxi in Pittsburgh if that counts. I guess I could take a train to Chicago for the fun of it. But driving there is faster and cheaper.

File: 5f7859ee-547f-4d17-8447-5155ed137baa.jpg (16KB, 300x300px) Image search: [Google]

16KB, 300x300px

>going to norway
>decide to go with a cruiseship , because why the hell not
>only old people
>stand in line to get into ship
>feel pockets for tickets
>hmm what is this.jpg
>check pockets , find some MDMA left from 2 days before
>fuck
>shit
>fuck
>i'm screwed
>only old people
>security is not checking anyone
>no scans , nothing
>my turn
>eehm, sir pls empty your pockets
this is just a random security check
>got black hair , brownish skin
>say , wow that's racist man .. you havent checked anyone beside me
>make a little scene
>everyone watching
>sorry sir , if this offended you
have a nice trip , you can go along

Mfw I smuggled MDMA on a cruiseship full of old people

Airport in China in a big international 1st tier city.

I arrived early, got dropped off at the international flight terminal, but couldn't find my flight to check in. I asked my airline counter customer service, and they told me to go to the other terminal to check in. So I walk all the way over there, find the airlines counter, I go up to sign in. They say "no, you can't sign in here. you must go to counter __". I go to said counter, and some stupid bitch tells me to go to ANOTHER counter in a very rude and condescending tone.

So I finally get to the right counter, but the fuckin guy says it's too late for me to check in. I still had about 40-45 minutes left before my plane departed. Told me the limit was 50 minutes.

I had to walk all the way back to the original terminal I arrived at and blow $400 right there for a new ticket. Cocksuckers wouldn't even give me a partial refund. Chinks don't know the meaning of customer service, and seem to treat foreigners pretty badly even though it was a big international airport. Really put me off the whole country for a few days.


I'm wondering if I would have yelled at them or created a scene, would they have done anything or given me a refund, or would I have been thrown in jail?

This thread is the reason I prefer to take an 18 hour overnight train journey to a 1.5hr flight. Fuck. Airports.

>>1093699
you know you smelled like semen and literally everybody in the plane realized you had just jacked off, right?

>>1095646
He was almost ready to erupt. What did you want him to do? Splooge his pants in his seat?

The people who are pissed off at TSA checks are guaranteed people who travel less than 2 or 3 times a year.

Once you get the rhythm it takes 1 minute to do security even less if you pay for the Secure Pass thing.

I'm frequently flabbergasted by how personal normies take that shit, yeah it's security theater but guess what?

Most of your life is theater of some sort.

>>1095812
>TSA
>pay for the Secure Pass

Murka, fuck yeah

File: 186312-Well-There-s-Your-Problem.jpg (53KB, 620x439px) Image search: [Google]

53KB, 620x439px

>>1092821
>say back obviously pissed "hey fuck you she waved me in twice"

File: 1450628935637.jpg (111KB, 420x550px) Image search: [Google]

111KB, 420x550px

>>1095616
>>1095624
Train transport in america sucks shit because Amtrak has the monopoly and charges twice what they should for some slow ass trains that don't even compare to what the rest of the world has.

Flew Wizzair, forgot advance check-in, had to pay.

That's pretty much it.

>>1093456
>at the airport
You are actually around the airport anon.

>>1095812
Its annoying when you have a laptop, bag of liquids, coat, backpack, cabin size suitcase and belt

You have to spend like 5 minutes unpacking stuff and the whole time the people behind are trying to rush you