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Feeling ill. Stuck at home. Friends all busy. Best friend is

This is a blue board which means that it's for everybody (Safe For Work content only). If you see any adult content, please report it.

Thread replies: 226
Thread images: 151

File: Il2qd.png (76KB, 713x420px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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Feeling ill. Stuck at home. Friends all busy. Best friend is out of town for a couple of weeks. Can we have a thread for funny and/or heartwarming /tg/ stories?
>>
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>>34281673
Sure thing bruh.

1/128
>>
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>>34281869
2/128
>>
>>34281869
>1/128
This is gonna be awesome. Thanks, anon.
>>
>>34281924
4/128
>>
>>34281948
5/128
>>34281939
I seriously did not think I had that many images... I thought it was only like 30. Lol.
>>
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>>34281967
6/128
>>
>>34281989
7/128
>>
>>34281989
I want this to be true, I want this to be true, I want this to be true...
>>
>>34282013
8/128
>>
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>>34282032
9/128 is located at >>34254313

Here's 10/128
>>
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>>34282083
11/128
>>
>>34282103
12/128
>>
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>>34282119
13/128
>>
>>34281967
That's actually amazing. I like that guy.
>>
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>>34282151
14/128
>>
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>>34282173
15/128
>>
>>34282151
How the fuck do you arm a trap with a bear? I need this in my next stronghold.
>>
>>34282197
16/128
>>
>>34282220
>How the fuck do you arm a trap with a bear?
Very carefully.
>>34282230
17/128
>>
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>>34282254
18/128
>>
>>34282283
19/128
>>
>>34282173
I fucking love this one.
>>
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>>34282306
20/128
>>
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chargenbysnusnu.jpg
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>>34282335
21/128
>>
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>>34282359
22/128
>>
>>34282385
23/128
>>
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>>34282013
Urist, you badass son of a bitch...
>>
>>34282013
That Story m8 was flipping glorious
>>
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>>34282403
24/128
>>
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>>34282434
25/128
>>
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>>34282449
26/128
>>
>>34282220
String. Connected to a pulley that releases a caged bear above the door.

Boom. Bear trap.
>>
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>>34282476
27/128
>>
>>34282504
28/128
>>
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>>34282528
29/128
>>
>>34281673
Are you ready to feel the light of the God-Emperor?

>http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/31172536/
>>
>>34282489
I was thinking more.. Getting a bear in the ceiling. The trigger and delivery would be relatively straightforward.
Though it'd be easier to just have a trapdoor TO the bear. Less cleanup afterwards too.
>>
>>34282197
Beautiful.

Love how it ends, too.
>WORTH IT
>Now I am prepared.
>>
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>>34282546
30/128
>>
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>>34282589
31/128
>>
>>34282557
Wand of Summon Nature's Ally? That way it only lasts a set amount of time.
>>
>>34282609
32/128
>>
>Literally has 128 of these.

THANKS BASED ANON
>>
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>>34282633
33/128
>>
>>34282660
34/128
>>
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>>34282671
35/128
>>
>>34282695
36/128
>>
>>34282727
37/128
>>
>>34282742
38/128
>>
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>>34282764
39/128
>>
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>>34282784
40/128
>>
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>>34282805
41/128
>>
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>>34282821
42/128
>>
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>>34282838
43/128
>>
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>>34282869
44/128
>>
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>>34282893
45/128
>>
>>34282917
46/128
>>
>>34282589
If the Chaos Lord is Slaaneshi it makes perfect sense to challenge him to a flamenco duel.
>>
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>>34282942
47/128 is located at >>34278837

Here's 48/128
>>
>>34282986
49/128
>>
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>>34283009
50/128
>>
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>>34283031
51-55 aren't /tg/ stories, and they're more situational, so without context they don't make much sense. I'll skip them.

56/128
>>
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>>34283054
57/128
>>
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>>34283069
58/128
>>
>>34283089
59/128
>>
>>34283109
60/128
>>
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>>34283128
61/128
>>
Is there a way to save the entire thread? Because I am betting I'll want to save all 128. I'll sort duplicates later.
>>
>>34283089

WTF is with the sentence structure in this one. It reads like a Borat skit.
>>
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>>34283143
62/128
>>
based 128 poster
thanks
>>
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>>34283163
63/128
>>34283159
I don't know. I actually think I only saved that for a small part of a campaign a while ago; it's only mildly interesting beyond that.
>>
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>>34283194
64/128
>>
>>34283210
65/128
>>
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>>34283224
66/128
>>
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>>34283153
>firefox
>https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/downthemall/
>pic related
>>
>>34283239
67/128

This is one that I particularly like.
>>
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>>34283265
68/128
>>34283263
>Inizia!
Calm down, Italian Firefox. You don't have to yell at me.
>>
>>34283263

Fantastic, thanks.
>>
>>34281924
...A lot of those were quoting a Monty python skit, actually.

Not one of the old tv sketches, one of the ones they made for the live shows.

It's really funny, have a watch:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe1a1wHxTyo
>>
>>34283289
69/128
>>
>>34283640
70/128

I'll post the others later tonight, maybe in an hour or two.
>>
>>34283163
>literally completely indifferent to barmaid's dick or absence thereof
>>
>>34281673
Damn I wish groups would take newbies in.
>>
>>34283677

thanks for doing this!
>>
>>34282476
I don't know how it would work, but I desperately what to see what would happen if one used this table in time wizards.
>>
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>>34283677
>>
>>34283640
>Noodle store guy yells at us for ruining his shop.

Every. Goddamn. Time.
>>
>>34283677
71/128
>>
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>>34284605
72/128
>>
>>34282013
Do you have the one about the dwarf actually getting to ysgrd or whatever? I know it's out there, I've read it before.
>>
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>>34284629
73/128

This one's very similar to the goblin story, but IIRC it's written slightly better.
>>
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>>34284650
74/128
>>34284641
I just looked through the rest of my /tg/ file, and it doesn't look like I have it.
>>
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lichjam conclusion.png
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>>34284681
75/128

Which is really annoying, because I remember seeing it before on here, and I guess I just didn't save it.
>>
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>>34284699
76/128
>>
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>>34284720
77/128
>>
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>>34284735
78/128
>>
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>>34284760
79/128
>>
>>34284786
80/128
>>
requesting that one comic where the player kills the bad guy in the middle of his monologue so the DM says an army of goblins or something come out and ambush the party
>>
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>>34284810
81/128
>>
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>>34284681
>>34284641
this?
>>
>>34284824
82/128
>>
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>>34284843
83/128
>>
>>34284862
84/128
>>
>>34284786
....o-oh. This explains a few things.
Also Skyrim? Quicksilver is fucking mithril. Don't hide it. You had mithril armor before. REAL quicksilver is liquid. Thus; quick silver.
>>
>>34284879
85/128
>>
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>>34284895
86/128
>>34284892
Quicksilver isn't liquid, it's just silver that's moving so quickly that it LOOKS like it's a liquid.
>>
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>>34284927
87/128
>>
>>34284927
I think I need to sit down now. This is getting heavy.
>>
>>34284939
88/128
>>
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>>34284961
89/128
>>
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random encounter.png
166KB, 1422x1754px
>>34284985
90/128
>>
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397KB, 1277x2069px
>>34285011
91/128
>>
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romans and d12s.jpg
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>>34285035
92/128
>>
>>34284961
That kraken is oddly adorable.
>GIVE THEM BACK GIVE THEM BACK
>>
>>34285052
93/128

This is just something back from all the /tg/ Goblins hate
>>
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>>34285068
94/128
>>
>>34285078
95/128
>>
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sir bearington.jpg
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>>34285104
96/128
>>
>>34285055
Now imagine it talks like Dr. Zoidberg.
>>
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>>34285119
97/128 is located at >>34257052

Here's 98/128
>>
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>>34285159
99/128
>>
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>>
>>34285134
I tried, but I found it works better as a Japanese loli.
>>
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psions.png
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>>34285174
Accidentally skipped over this one from earlier
>>
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slavic elves.png
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>>34285244
101/128
>>
>>34285277
102/128
>>
Does anyone have that 10 part series with the Necromancer Cleric and the Paladin? Or the link to it.
>>
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succubus.png
40KB, 1525x488px
>>34285312
103/128
>>
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>>34285334
104/128
>>
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tarrasquelogic.png
14KB, 1231x224px
>>34285349
105/128
>>
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tg fears.png
60KB, 989x589px
>>34285368
106/128
>>
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tg in a nutshell.png
38KB, 547x207px
>>34285387
107/128
>>
>>34285407
108/128
>>
>>34285435
109/128
>>
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tg turns x.png
1MB, 1632x4000px
>>34285455
110/128
>>
>>34285455
That dinosaur's bird camoflague is slipping.
>>
>>34285470
111/128
>>
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tombombadil.jpg
148KB, 500x492px
>>34285491
112/128
>>
>>34285538
113/128 is located at >>34278789

Here's 114/128
>>
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vedgepygmies.png
107KB, 1024x1314px
>>34285586
115/128
>>
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warforged ninja.png
25KB, 1319x290px
>>34285604
116/128
>>
File: webcam races.jpg (243KB, 986x2295px)
webcam races.jpg
243KB, 986x2295px
>>34285619
117/128
>>
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warforged paladin.png
79KB, 1227x340px
>>34285650
118/128
>>
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what a scam.png
193KB, 945x768px
>>34285675
119/128
>>
>>34285690
120/128
>>
>>34281967
This one is great
>>
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Who's Kirk.png
653KB, 1580x1554px
>>34285717
121/128
>>
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why the harpy.png
25KB, 461x465px
>>34285760
122/128
>>
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wife beaters.png
11KB, 746x177px
>>34285780
123/128
>>
>>34285799

Please don't stop posting after 128. Just carry on. I need this shit more than life.
>>
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Wizard day job.jpg
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>>34285799
124/128
>>
>>34285915
125/128
>>
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>>34285967
126/128
>>
>>34285997
127/128
>>
>Eddie Izzard the Lizard Wizard
>>
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>>34286018
128/128

This was fun. I felt a little bad for only ever lurking in these kinds of threads, and never sharing any of my own pics, so when I saw OP's empty thread, I guess I decided to make up for it in a way by dumping my whole folder.
>>
>>34286070
Thank you OP.

You are my greatest ally.
>>
>>34286070
I'm not OP, but you did god's work today son
>>
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>>34285846
Well I don't have anything else in my /tg/ folder, but I can give you this one pic from my skeleton folder.
>>
>>34286090
128 here. I'm not OP.
>>
>>34286134
You are in my heart... OP.
>>
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>>34286043
>Warhammer 401K
>>
>>34286134
Sir you are a gentleman and a scholar. Should ever you need a nametag I urge you to name thyself something involving 128. We who were here shall know you by it.
>>
>>34285470
[desire to know more intensifies]
>>
I think I might have one or two that haven't been posted yet.
>>
>>34286101
>Skeleton folder
Gib pls
>>
>>34285314
bamp?
>>
>>34286432
>>
>>34286134
>I'd blow you
>>
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Monster Manuel.jpg
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>>34286458
>>
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Mage Hand fondling.png
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>>34286476
>>
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The Prophecy-Bearer.jpg
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>>34286500
>>
>>34286533
I have about 690 of these in my threads folder, so I think I'll stop here for now.
>>
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>>34286599
>690
Prove it, motherfucker.
>>
File: Told you.png (371KB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
Told you.png
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>>34286770
Some of them were already posted and some of them aren't /tg/ related.
>>
>>34281673
I got a couple.
>>
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BROlaire.jpg
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>>34287277
THIS SHITLORD DIDN'T EVEN POST BROLAIRE
WHAT A FAGGOT
>>
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>>34287277
>>
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GINL.jpg
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>>34287311
>>
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>>34287338
>>
>>34284825
Yes. Thank you, based anon.
>>
>>34287338
>reading everything in their voices despite barely watching the show and not having watched the show in eons
>that ending
>>
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>>
>>34287209
Please post Anon gets a letter and Anus Druids, those seem promising.
>>
>>34286070
OP here. You're a hero.
>>
>>34283263
Is there any way to make the images have the same name as the links to them?
>>
>>34282032
This is cool but I am a noob at Dnd so I have a question if he enchanted these items when the players wore them wouldn't they have checks for magic? Or do they have to explicitly act the check themselves
>>
Hey /tg/ just a quick question. What's our current opinion on streams?
>>
>>34289223
Like, streaming a campaign?
That sounds shitty
>>
>>34289236
No like streaming a movie for you guys.
>>
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>>34289204
Normally, when you find a magic item, whoever has the highest Spellcraft skill or highest INT rolls a check to see what it's properties might be, or you take it to a wizard so he can study it. Or you give it to the person with the lowest INT and he studies it. The point is, you actively make the check.

If you're buying a magic item from a reputable shop or receiving one from someone you know, you have no reason to doubt the magic item does what they say it does and nothing else.

I've used this method to kill people seven times, six of which were in the same campaign. My group fell for it twice, in our evil run. First getting the stuff from me directly, then by buying their gear from a competing magic shop I secretly owned in order to make sure no one could undercut my prices.

The "owner" of the other shop was instructed to sell cursed items to people that might cause trouble for me later. I almost missed the perception check to realize their gear was my own design. I wish I could play that adventure again.
>>
>>34281869
>1/128
ohhhhhhh
>>
>>34289712
Thank you friend

If one of the characters had been a paladin could they have an automatic detect evil item and be able know when an armour or weapon is cursed
>>
>>34289712

That's devilishly evil.

And pretty damned funny.

And cunningly clever to boot.

I wish I had the slyness to pull of this kind of thing. Instead I'm usually the guy who pulls in the cavalry to make sure our team has an exit plan, or that we actually bring an army to back us when we go to fight the final boss, or try at all to make allies of those who we meet instead of just going at it by our lonesome or expecting them to just show up because you're just so special.

Man, that character earned, made, and stole every damn merit, magical item, and magical gift he had.
>>
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>>34286070
You da real MVP
>>
>>34290024
The second time I killed them wasn't even planned.

It was a well suspected fact that I was an evil man, I tend to play Lawful Evil as Lawyer Evil. What this means, is that I had a poor reputation with the good adventurers/church when I started my business. There were always small, local shops that sold potions or cheap/low quality items, but if you wanted the good shit, you needed to make it yourself or go to this expensive chain of stores that almost cornered the market in three kingdoms because they had religious backing.

I'll spare the economics and politics I had to go through to set myself up as a contender against that company, for lack of a better word. It boils down to a few assassinations, a lot of dirt on a few hedonistic nobles, a few undead outbreaks, and my cohort from leadership being an illusionist.

Later on, the owner of the other store started lowering his prices now that I was stealing some of his business, mainly from the less reputable members of our society. He wasn't even a wizard, so I had him killed, and Cohort replaced him. Even more dirty dealings like firing a few barely substandard enchanters so that I could hire them in my store, and getting the cohort to give me the other owner's share of gold, and I was a very rich man.

I started having my shop, filled with slighted NPCs, make cursed items almost exclusively, and traded stock between the two freely. continued.
>>
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>>34290312
There were other groups of adventurers in this setting, good ones. My party weren't "the" big bads of the setting, but we'd made it on more than one shit list, so the tellers at the big company's stores were told to save "certain high powered artifacts" for people who looked a cut above the average dungeon delver or ratkiller, because that shop had the reputation with them.

So, basically any new and upcoming threats would either get lucky and find their gear somewhere, or would buy cursed versions that did all sorts of terrible shit. My party didn't know it when they tried to get vengeance on me.

The command word for the stuff I made was Cletus Judd because of a song I was listening to at the time. The command word for the stuff made by the others was my cat's name. He was such a dick, he would've been proud.
>>
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>>34281673
I don't want to derail this wonderful thread, but I capped this yesterday on /wsg/ and I'm still laughing my ass off over it. Thought I'd share.
>>
Capped this a bit ago. Pretty good, I think.
>>
>>34290834
You liar, all I feel is sadness and anger.
>>
>>34290834
>went to college anime club
>it was the same people as the gaming club
>generally watched decent shit, and if I wasn't interested, I didn't go
>games were always fun
>anime references during games were always minimal, and mostly pretty subtle or actually funny
>never watched Hetalia
I liked that.
>>
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>>34283677
I was okay until his 'mfw' was the fucking babby. I just lost it completely it's almost five a.m. help
>>
bamp
>>
>>34281924
Holy christ I almost laughed my stoned lungs out. Thank you /tg/.
>>
bump, reading
>>
>>34281869

>1/128
Sweet black Jesus...
>>
>>34292056

>anime club is the same as the asian club
>they watch some good shit, some shit shit
>and play mahjong
>like 5 mahjong tables set up every day
>club's been shut down twice for gambling
>I've been told that the gambling didn't go away, it moved to Chinatown
>>
>>34282869
>Did... did your monk just-
>Yeah, he does that a lot.
>>
>>34286070
spent hours reading through all that, thank you kindly anon.
>>
More shall enjoy this fine thread in the evening.
>>
>>34284985
Can there be any ways to make it aim?
Perhaps building a very sturdy quadrapedal golem that can root itself in place but still rotate a small amount and creating a railgun on it's back?
>>
>>34289308
Yes, do it! I vote for a silent film!
>>
>>34283677
I wonder, how does one do something like aquire the items necessary for becoming a lich without the parry knowing. Note passing? Or just telling the gm and the other people pretend to not know?
>>
>>34284650
Do you have the goblin story?
>>
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>>34292056
>never watched hetalia
Jesus christ, that lone thing alone makes me want to have gone to your college.
I hate hetalia.
Submitting some stuff myself on account of the 1/128 posting all this glory, and not posting myself.
>>
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>>34309222
>>
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>>34309273
>>
>>34309287
aaand that's the limit. Nevermind.
>>
>>34309328
New thread time?
>>
>>34309385
If you want. I just realized I should sort through my folders and actually make one for 4chan shit. If you make one I'l probably post some later.
>>
>>34309416
New thread >>34309601
>>
Holy shit this is till alive. Anyway thanks to 128, I spent all yesterday reading and almost missed my PF session.

>mfw half the party is bleeding and the prince tagging along with us into this necromacers tomb reveals being a necromancer only when we tell him to stop being a pussy ass healer
>should've realized earlier
Thread posts: 226
Thread images: 151


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