Archived threads in /tg/ - Traditional Games - 4069. page

>shitposting

Dear cardboard crack guy,

In the past, I would try and dishearten you.

Your jokes are are not funny, and you obviously don't put any effort into your art, so there's really nothing good about your comic, especially because it's just the kind of mindless thing that people on tumblr and facebook would post to each other because it's absolutely harmless and acts as a replacement for their personality. Them posting your comic would be their way of saying "Look, I play this game! That's something about me that I can share that's a tiny little factoid you can remember about me, so I don't just wind up as an absolutely forgettable person with nothing of interest about them!"

And, you also have the gall to try and spam this comic here, where people don't really care about defining their identity and have little need or desire for unfunny, unambitious comics that take absolutely no risks and have not improved in the slighest and might actually be getting worse.

But, that's not you being an iredeemable piece of shit who makes the world a slightly worse place inadvertently. That's just you being a piece of shit who makes the world a slightly worse place inadvertantly. The key word is iredeemable there.

You can get better. It seems you like MTG, which is nice, and wanting to share your passion is good. Going through the trouble of thinking up a comic and making it, even if the end product is just something that looks like one of those countless awful XKCD clones, shows that you've got at least some initiative, and I really want you to take that next step.

Actually try and be funny. You can't really be funny if you don't surprise anyone, and so far all you've managed to do is recycle jokes for small children and slap MTG on top of them.
Work a little harder on your art. It might take time, and you might suck at it for awhile, but at least you'll be respecting the comic as a visual medium, rather than just a toilet for people who can't write.

Take risks, and good luck.

>>45892592
Primary Black, Secondary Red, Tertiary White. What do I win?

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You have to go back.

Yfw when Wall of the Faithless was built to keep the godless moochers out of the afterlife.

>>45896978
>The Wall exists because without it, mortals could freely choose not to worship without punishment
>Which could make gods die, and we're way more important than the countless godless souls that are plastered together
>Nevermind the fact that 95% of the sapient mortals on Toril have no idea the wall exists because they're not privy to the secrets of the afterlife
>So most of the souls in it are there out of ignorance, as if it's somehow their fault
>If you're lucky, fiends find their way into the fugue plane and steal your helpless soul from the wall to torture for all eternity or devour

Wall of the Faithless is one of the greatest injustices in the FR cosmology. TEAR THIS WALL DOWN

>Thraximundar
Let The Bodies Hit The Floor

>>45891817
Rakdos
Any metal song ever

Daretti
Stinkfist

Doomguy was one of the lost primarchs.

>>45891106
He would be a guardsman, and they would send him alone to stop demonic incursions. If they ever sent him to Cadia he would depopulate the eye of terror

>>45891122
And struck from the records for incompetence.
:^)

>>45891075
No, you don't have it right. We don't know enough of the story yet to know why she's mad.

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>>45891466
It appears to have something to do with Sorin.

>>45891075
>Sorin and Nahiri used to be blood-sugar daddy and daughterfu
They didn't seem to be that close. it was closer to a reluctant pupil and reluctant mentor. they were oldwalkers, they tolerated each other.
>as a safeguard in case the system fails Sorin reluctantly puts his waifu in stasis in the hedron seals
no, Nahiri stayed on zendikar to baybysit the eldrazi trap, lived for generations, because oldwalker, and eventually went into deep underground lithomancer hibernation because babysitting frozen eldrazi is boring.
>millennia pass
then zendikar hiccups, nahiri wakesu p from rockstasis, finds vampires fucking with hedrons (vampires that didn't exist when she went to sleep) and fuckes them off, fixes the hedrons and buggers off to find out why sorin and ugin are fucking about while she's napping.
>millennia pass again
Sorin find's ugin's paradox hedron prison, lets him out, dragon jesus says "stop fucking about and go get nahiri" sorin knows where nahiri is because reasons, but he's super evasive.
>then BfZ happens
>now sorin has apparently found nahiri, or she's found him and she's on a millennium old rag.

>>45891055
Once I went back to the plane where I found my sword in search of help with defeating biomechanical hivemind horrors but instead the Sun God enlisted me to kill an asshole rapist satyr who'd somehow become the Party God and then after I did the Sun God stabbed me in the gut with his spear and now I'm a Returned.

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>>45891055
I love satyrs. I sort of want to make a satyr priest but I'm not sure how I can make it work with their partying nature
I know the artist. He makes great smut.

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>>45891055
For most settings, I make satyrs not the rapey lustful creatures known from greek mythology, but like dude-ish happy hippy folk, many constanty stoned, making them hilariously oblivious to the many dangers surrounding them. Living in comunnal tribal societies, almost always neutral to outside matters, living by free love and "live and let live" ideals. They work great as unwitting quest givers

Stoned Satyr: "Hey man, like, I don't know dude, but the last couple of months, we've been hearing some wicked sounds coming from the cave in the northern part of the forest and like, we tried everything we could and like we don't know what to do man..."

PC: "You did what exactly?"

"We like tried to talk to the cave, man, like shouting into it, playing some music to it and stuff, one of us went in to see what it was, man, and like I don't think he has found it man, he still hasn't come back, I think he's fine, though, yesterday the cave smelled like cooked meat and smoke came out of it, so I bet he managed to find some food before reaching whatever made those noises...

>>45890635

My setting is a flat world. It's suspended in the Void inside a massive glass orb filled halfway with water.

It's also a serious low-magic setting with no monsters or fantasy races besides orcs.

In the Elder Scrolls the sky is more like a ceiling and the stars are little holes to another dimension.

>>45890635
Yep. The astral plane.

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>>45890502
>Abominable intelligence.

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>>45890528

I can assure you Magos Anon, There is at least part of a human brain in there.

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They burn, dunk in acid and crush what's left, throwing the metal coupe into the void of space, as any techpreist should.
Praise the omnissiah

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Big Minion Master Fan here.
DM hates how long it takes me to get all my Animals to attack. He usually just makes them all do the same attack at once and stop them from doing anything too complex.
He also hates how many quirks I give my lil buddies. It can't just be a boar, it has to be a energetic little shit that tries to guide your hand to it's ears. Can't just be an attack dog, I'd have to make it a sick old dog who does Poison Damage when biting.
Continuing with your post, have another Dolphin.

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>>45890087
Dolphins are greats. Anyone have tips on how to make a merman character?
>Search for merman art
>Mostly gay shit
Fucking why?

They're a fucking pain in the ass to deal with and just more paperwork. Then everyone else wants them and before you know it you've got a fucking zoo following you everywhere.

>>45889697
Yeah,
He's called the DM.

>>45889697
Some betacuck pirates, from the Lily Liver. The PCs shout mean words at them every time they show.

>>45889697
steve. steve a bitch.

>>45889593
It detects treasure and attracts Krakens

>I fucked up and gave the weeaboo a katana, how do I nerf them?
Haha, idiot. You didn't correct your mistake like an adult, so I think you got what you deserve.


Make the curse something interesting, if you just mechanically make it suck you're an idiot. Make it have a sort of memetic enchantment on it that makes people yearn for it, so people start hunting the player down for their new sword. That way they don't get nerfed, they become invested in the item, it encourages roleplay, and gives you a free excuse to throw more enemies at the PCs.

>>45889593
I bet she loves the vagina because she looks like a lesbian tom boy. Her butch lesbian lover probably plays soccer (Futbol).

>>45889559
What happens to the person who's body I snatched?

>>45890115
They become a voice in your head until somebody can kick you out.

>>45890139
No deal, nothing is worth hearing a constant voice shouting angrily at you or singing an annoying song until you die.

>>45889286
>Is it okay for a player to base a character off of media?
Yes, it is.

>Is it okay to literally copy-paste an entire character, without so much as changing the name?
No, it is not.

>>45889761
/thread

>>45889286
Who?

>>45888197
I make a point of not buying into hype.
I sell into hype, but never buy.

>>45888197

This legit had me worried. I want at least one for edh, but I feel like this will see standard play because Husk/Fleshbag are sticking around for another rotation. Hell, it might see modern play.

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I wonder if the zombie tribal in SoI will be enough to get Undead Servant to see constructed play.

>>45887205
SUPER HYPE!

>>45887205
It's hypening!

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>>45887205
Chakra Cape of Doom Kon when?