Archived threads in /tg/ - Traditional Games - 3308. page

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hey people... any cool D&D accessories you have or wish to have ? looking for some inspiration..

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Suppose I give one of my players a (unmagical/mundane) sword or mace made of an especially dense metal, like, I dunno, uranium or plutonium or osmium (of course I'd change the name to something fantasy-like so it wouldn't be jarring), how would this affect base damage?
For example, in D&D 3.x:
A Medium steel Battleaxe for medium creatures weighs 6 lbs according to the Player's Handbook.
Making it out of uranium (almost 3x density) would make it around 18 lbs.
Would that affect damage? Or is that not enough of a weight increase to warrant such?
What about made-up metals that are extremely dense, that would make it weigh, say, 90 lbs.
Would that be enough to, say, make it count as a weapon sized for Large creatures, along with the penalty to attacks?
What about autistically heavy weapons? Like, say, pic related (in real-world myth, if I recall correctly, nothing's special about Mjolnir by itself except it weighs 2 tons), or you're fighting an avatar of the Demigod of Blades and his is somehow made of the material of the core of a dwarf star, which would weigh (if my math is right) about 255 tons. Assuming he has the Strength score of, I think, 82-85 minimum to swing that sucker around, what would happen if it happened to connect with your player's sternum?

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Have you ever invented a spell, or wanted to invent a spell but your DM said no?

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>be a low level adventuring group, ride along the road
>spot three dragons who are torturing someone
>engage dragons in conversation, eventually persuade them to leave
>you have saved a crippled goblin(dragons singed off three of his limbs)
>goblin tells you, his tribe is prepping up an attack on nearby village

What do with goblin?

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Ravandil: Shut the fuck up Bitchworth, get your sorry ass back into the forest and shit in a bush or something, we’re on a quest to save the fucking world and I can’t be arsed to deal with your bullshit right now.

Bitchworth: Ooohh, but Ravandil, you know we can’t let you leave unless you make a trade with us… You know how the saying goes around here, you either pay with some grass… or with your ass.

Some dude: Oh man, I didn’t join this quest to be fucked by elves!

Ravandil: For fuck’s sake. Urist, you know what to do.

Urist: ALRIGHT! LISTEN TO ME YOU POLE-PROPORTIONED DENDROPHILES! IF YOU TRY ANYTHING NASTY WITH THE BITCHBOY OVER HERE I’M GONNA TAKE YOUR FUCKING ARROWS AND SHOVE THEM INBETWEEN YER POLISHED FINGERNAILS! I AM GOING TO TAKE THAT BOW STRING OF YOURS AND STRING YOU UP BY YOUR FUCKING FORESKIN UNTIL GRAVITY GIVES YOU A BOTCHED CIRCUMCISION AND PLAY IT LIKE A FUCKING VIOLIN! I’M GOING TO HEADBUTT YOU UNTIL THERE IS NOTHING BUT A BUTT LEFT! I’M GOING TO COLOUR THAT LITTLE PANSY GREEN SKIRT RED USING YER FUCKING BONE MARROW! YOU BETTER BELIEVE YOU’RE GOING TO WISH THAT YOU WERE NEVER BORN, ‘CAUSE I’LL MAKE IT SEEM LIKE YOU NEVER WERE, YE ATROCIOUS FUCKIN’ BOIL ON THE FACE OF REALITY! I WILL-

Skaven assassin: What the fuck fuck is going on here?
-----------------------------------

Anchors Narrator: After deeply insulting the elves and scaring them away, our threesome of heroes make their way to the Skaven hellscape. Little did they know, they were being closely followed by the sinister assassin that sam-fishered the shit out of that wizard in the first episode. However, little did they know they were being watched by the rat fuck wizard…

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Looking for assistance in creating a Scandinavian-style setting for my players and ideas for what adventures and quests could take place in such a world to justify the inevitable bouts of mead consumption and Saxon murder.

Humans, light elfs, dark elfs, dwarfs, and jotun of many kinds roam these lands, but what other creatures, races, and monsters from Scandinavian folklore could exist? Has /tg/ ever played in a Norse setting and, if so, do they have any wisdom to spare?

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I'm planning to start a RPG campaign in a world that is entire an alegorie to the real world. All the races in the game will be the tinny as possible, like gnomes, frogs and insectoid faeries.

Well, I need ideas for enemies, with images if possible. Recalling that in this case, everthing is very small and humans have titanic scale.

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ITT: The most awful things you have done or witnessed someone do in Table top rpgs or card games

>Playing at a local Mtg tournament
>been losing all day
>haven't won a single match
>feel really angry and frustrated
>suddenly get an idea
>at my last match
>as expected I am getting beat, not by much but I am almost out of life
>take my deck and shuffle it for no reason
>opponent looks confused
>place my deck back down in front of him
>as intended, he cuts it
>as soon as he does this I call over a judge
>I win by dq
>mixed feelings
>found out later this tactic has been used before

I felt bad but I was also happy I won a game.

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Which of the following acts causes a paladin to fall?

> Deliberately killing an innocent man to save another innocent man in a diabolical scheme
> Deliberately killing an innocent man to save what he thought was another innocent man but was actually a lich
> Accidentally putting on the helm of opposite alignment
> Accidentally giving the helm of opposite alignment to his paladin friend, causing him to fall, then subsequently killing him because he was acting evil
> Accidentally leaving a shop with goods in his pocket
> Looting what he thought was a dungeon but was actually somebody's home
> Looting what he thought was a dungeon but was actually a temple to his god
> Sleeping with an underage person who assured him she was 18
> It also turns out it was his sister
> Killing an innocent man while under a spell
> Killing an innocent man because he drank a potion causing berserk rage that was served to him as beer
> Having his god die somehow
> His god has become chaotic evil somehow
> His order has become chaotic evil somehow
> His order is telling him to kill innocent people so he rebels but it turns out those innocent people were actually evil sorcerers
> Choosing himself to live instead of an NPC in a diabolical scheme where he gets to choose who lives

Also it's way more fun to scheme than to tell people to not play paladins so shut up.

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Are there any good systems for doing a boxing RPG, /tg/? Something that appreciates the difference between a jab and a cross and has room to roleplay training montages. Even if it's crunchy as hell I know my group won't mind.

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>Jeskai control using Nahiri to fetch Emrakul.
>Nahiri literally fetches Emrakul in Innistrad story.

Are we just going to ignore the fact that a competitive modern deck was a clue to what was happening on Innistrad?

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Does anyone know where I could get my hands on these? I remember buying them as a kid when I lived in Taiwan and I ended up giving them to a friend I no longer speak to. Would love to purchase authentic ones.

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Get in, faggot.

We're going to make America great again.

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Alright, so Ive got a bit of a question regarding futuristic societies for settings.

So, as we all know, medicine and treatment has increased in quality quite a bit even just over the past few decades. The obvious side affects, longer lifespan, diseases becoming less lethal, etc. are pretty obvious, but I'm kind of curious about a different effect. Namely, the "survival of the fittest" effect. Thanks to advances in medicine, people who would normally die off before reproducing are now living long enough to do so, passing along their genetic traits along the way. Now, I'm no biologist yet, but wouldnt this mean that as society advanced, you would see a sharp increase in less desirable traits over time? For example, bad eyesight, genetic disposition towards obesity, bad hearts, mental disorders, odds of getting cancer, the list goes on and on.

The question I have, is would it be possible that the breeding of flaws (survival of the weakest, if you will) will outpace the advances in modern medicine? That at a certain point, genetic flaws and disorders would be so common that they simply overwhelm our ability to treat them? Obviously we're talking hundreds of years down the road here, but I feel it would be an interesting theory to base a setting on. Given that first world countries are the most likely to have proper medicine, and be the first to explore the stars, I feel like itd be very possible, especially if some sort of "dark age" cut off colonies from the more varied genetics of earth.

Would these colonies, without the advanced resources they need to keep their genetic shitshow in check, be forced to resort to more extreme measures to survive? Say for example, genetic experimentation and manipulation, or more horrifying, abandoning the flesh to replace it with the machine? Or worse, would they be forced to live with what they were dealt, being a pale mockery of mankind used to be, twisted by maladies and madnesses beyond counting?