Archived threads in /tg/ - Traditional Games - 2805. page

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>>49398665
>To the forever-DMs who want to play but can't, how are you holding up? How is your trove of level 1 characters doing?

I'll never get to play a session as a player in my life.

B..but that's alright, as long as I make each session memorable we'll all have fun! ;-;

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>>49398731
Only one more year before I transfer from community college and move to university. Surely I'll find refuge there?

so whats this Volo Guide im hearing talk about, a guide to playable monsters?
im a newbie and im not as plugged in as id like
i hope it is though, ive got a kobold shop keep i love to turn into a PC is i get to play rather than DM

>Halfway through telling him we'll just use the lower price because I don't care much for foils when he flips out, saying it costs too much
>Says that he checked SCG LAST NIGHT and that brutalities were $7 tops (a blatant lie), and just gets up and leaves, shouting that I'm wasting his time
>Goes over to one of his "friends" and starts loudly talking shit about me, saying that the prices will drop and it's not nearly worth that much
>mfw I drove 20 minutes and he drove 5 tops, did no research, and just completely insulted me
>I sit down and watch my buddy for a while, fuming, and then leave

I don't normally go to that area to play, but if I'm ever there for a tournament and I see him again, I swear there'll be problems.

>RTR prerelease, I've only been playing since M13 so I'm super casual and have no idea what I'm doing
>decide to start trading shit because I really want a Rakdos
>find a guy who pulled one and he's down to trade it
>looks through my shit
>I had a Liliana of the Veil I wasn't using
>he says he'd trade the Rakdos for it
>I say yes
>Yay, Rakdos
>Liliana of the Veil ends up worth more than fucking JTMS
>Rakdos is $2.50
Once I figured out what happened I was salty as fuck.

>>49398346
What, was rakdos $2.50 then? You traded a planeswalker card for a $2.50 card?

>>49397091

>what would a gold coin in 5e be worth in our currency?

About tree fiddy

>>49397091
Currency in the vast majority of fantasy games is completely fucked and out of scale.

>>49397212
/thread

Not as good as Neo-Innistrad, way better than Neo-Eldrazi
Will draft half a dozen times

I honestly have no fucking clue yet. Looking forward to drafting it a bit to try to get a sense of it.
It's pretty shit Constructed-wise, especially if we're talking anything other than Standard.

>>49392124
Draft looked okay, felt like it would be fast paced.

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>>49402450
Let's have a change of pace, boys. Tell the class about your dudes, post minis, and tell us about your last game.

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Anyone put the CSM terminator lord cape on a tartaros suit?

>>49402742
I would at least send that cape back to the tailor. Sometimes a battle damaged cape looks better, but it says something when you're good enough to fight without your cape being destroyed.

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>>49396833

Humans.

>>49396833
You

>>49396833
magical aids

>>49391967
They have beards.

They also have beards.

They're not, outsiders just think they are.

>>49391967

sideburns that don't extend into beards

Male children start growing in facial hair far earlier then male human children as well as similar for females as with adult females

Generally Dwarven culture as a whole dictates most social roles based on gender: Women often taking care of the home while the men are out in other pursuits. The strictness of this varies across the world with some large dwarven communities having women in roles often dominated by males although this is more common with Dwarven communities in mixed race areas.

>>49391977
>The children have beards.
>You suddenly realize the surely inn keeper is actually 2 dwarven kids in a trenchcoat, what do?

>>49405693
She probably would be less of an annoying cunt, then shitposters with their bait threads.

>>49405693
>What would a SJW equivalent among Sister of Battle be like

Problematic.

>>49405693
When you boil it down, a SJW is just a deluded irrational fanatic for whatever left wing cause they've chosen. 40k is full of deluded irrational fanatics.

>>49400451
a creative mimic

Vagina Dentata

Size/Type: Large Magical Beast
Hit Dice: 5d10+25 (52 hp)
Initiative: +1
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class: 15 (-1 size, +1 Dex, +5 natural), touch 10, flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple: +5/+14
Attack: Claw +9 melee (1d6+5)
Full Attack: 2 claws +9 melee (1d6+5) and bite +4 melee (1d8+2)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: Improved grab
Special Qualities: Scent
Saves: Fort +9, Ref +5, Will +2
Abilities: Str 21, Dex 12, Con 21, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 10
Skills: Listen +8, Spot +8
Feats: Alertness, Track
Environment: Temperate forests
Organization: Solitary, pair, or pack (3-8)
Challenge Rating: 4
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always neutral
Advancement: 6-8 HD (Large); 9-15 HD (Huge)
Level Adjustment: —

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First things first. The abyss, also known as the deep sea, the midnight zone (actual scientific term, by the way), or underwater vore hell (not actual scientific term, but very accurate description), can be defined as the area of sea deeper than 1 kilometer (technically this is called the bathypelagic; abyssopelagic is below 4 km, but both are dark and have weird fish with way too much teeth).

Light only properly penetrates the upper 200 meters of ocean, which is practically nothing. Below that you get some light, but not enough for plants to photosynthesise. Below around 1 km, you have no light at all. Everything is dark, cold (water is densest at 4 degrees C, so that's the common temperature of the deep sea), and generally not what you'd call hospitable. In fact, for the longest amount of time, people belived nothing except maybe invertebrates and bacteria could live down there. They were, of course, wrong. Nature will find a way to stick something into any environment something could theoretically live in.

So, how the hell do things survive in an enormous pitch-black volume of water with no autotrophic life? Well, as I'm about to show you, the answer is "by being really horrifying" (little known fact, but 75% of nutrition of deep sea fish come from the nigthmares of mortals. This is not an actual scientific fact, so don't write than on an exam).

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The biggest problems deep sea animals face is the fact that the abyss is mind-bogglingly huge and mostly empty (an environment like that can't really sustain a large amount of animals per volume). So simple things as finding anything to eat ot mate with are suddenly very difficult. This leads to the whole "being really horrifying" part, because in order to survive deep sea fish have had to evolve extreme adaptions that tend to make them look very alien and unsettling.

In order to conserve energy, they've lost as much unnecessary "dead weight" as possible, such as scales and unnecesary bone- or muscle-mass giving many of them either blobby or almost skeletal appearance and slimy, scaleless skin.
In order to hide themselves from predators their skin is pitch black or blood red (red is the first colour to be absorbed by water, so being red is as effective camoflage as being black).
And because there is so little light, they either have huge eyes to catch whatever little light there is, or very small eyes. Many species also generate their own light to attract prey or mate, or help them see.
Since no plants can grow in the deep sea, all life there (aside from those aside hydrothermal springs and things like that, but that's a very special case) are either scavengers or predators. The size and emptiness of their home also means that the average deep sea fish is lucky if it encounters anything even vaquely edible, so they tend have evolved means of ensuring they're able to eat any potential prey, even if it's bigger than themselves and wanting to eat them (while there is a food chain in the deep sea, large part of it is pretty much just a bunch of fish all trying to eat each other). As such they tend to have huge gaping mouths, needle-like teeth, and elastic stomachs that let them swallow prey their own size or bigger.

I'll introduce some specific examples of deep sea horrofish next, starting with my personal favorites. Also, please ignore random boat slut in picture.

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>>49391883
Keep going man, this is interesting stuff

>Setting: Re:Volution by Coldcut

Hmm. Well, all right, I guess I can-

>Protagonist: Ocean Eyes by Billie Eilish
O-oh. Well, a love story in an anarchic society isn't impossible, and-

>Antagonist: Dies Irae

Man, somebody's life is going to SUCK.

>>49384600
This again? Alright, I'm game.
>Whistle For the Choir by the Fratellis
Optimistic cyberpunk. It's the future, and things are shit, but they can still get better.
>Left Hand Suzuki Method by Gorillaz
An addict/genius hacker, convinced he can see God in the code.
>Lifetime Achievement Award by Lemon Demon
A major megacorporation announces a revolutionary new tech: a method of reviving the dead. The God in the code doesn't like this one bit.

>>49384600
>Loser by Beck
The collective dreamscape of hundreds of millions. While most of it still follows the Old Rules, that doesn't mean you won't still see some wacky shit out there. Reality is just Perception with some pretentions to accuracy, after all, and "just go with the crazy" is the most important rule for survival.
>Down at McDonaldz by Electric Six
Protag's fed up with the weird shit. All he wants is to live somewhere where everyone knows physics work one way and not the other, and that a bipedal deer with person hands is weird and ridiculous.
>Electioneering by Radiohead
A charismatic King, using his people's collective belief in his power to cast powerful magic.

>>49370562
Punt them

>>49370562
They try to figure out a way to calm her down, because if any of them harms her in any way, my character will break all their fingers.

>>49370562
>Step 1: Apply sword to face
>Step 2: Repeat as necessary until dead

BBEG just demonstrated ability to change forms, I'm not taking chances. If I'm wrong, we'll have a nice funeral for the little girl. If I'm not, I'll still give him a funeral, because no one deserves to be left to rot above ground. No matter how many people they killed.

I honestly can not give a fuck anymore, shits stale.

Let sleeping dogs lie

>>49392932
I'm more ambivalent towards it than anything. I prefer point build systems to class and level systems, but that's the worst I can really say.

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>>49392932
>only thing realized ITT

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>>49392708
>here, enjoy the use of your left arm
>hey wall, did you know my axe is a flying squirrel
>where the fuck did this glowy arrow come from now my precious strawberry will be lost forever
>look at this shit my feet hurt I'm hungry

>>49384053
Its actually a prison, now you're all fucked
Its nowhere near an ocean, what is it guiding?
Its actually a dildo, now you're all getting fucked

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>>49384053
>What would your players find?


Cyclopes Lighthouse keeper.

The local sea side village commissioned her father to construct and care for the lighthouse, but he died only a few short years ago, leaving behind his daughter to take care of the lighthouse. Only three people from the village came out to pay respects to her father and one of them was a priest who was obligated to do the funeral service.
She had to dig the hole and lower her father into it herself- she was the only person large enough to do so.

She's been by herself ever since, quietly running the Lighthouse with the village quietly ignoring her.

>>49384053
More lighthouses