/HEEM/ F A M Edition

first for Schaub

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end

it

all

schaub

Third for guns

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KayKay desu

>>63314896
>tfw Schaub fired her this weekend but she started crying so he rehired her

;__;

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>>63314862
what's done is done, it hurts so bad

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>>63314909
is that for real? I haven't listened to the latest ep

For fans of TJ facepunching, here's the best facepunching manlet

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5d1AJTgst9c

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>>63314933
what once was happy, now is sad

>>63314818

my country was occupied by nazis but I'm still triggered

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>>63314948
I'll never love again, my world is ending

>>63314871


you're crazy if you think:

1. that the military would even follow the orders of seizing people's weapons

and

2. that the citizens would stand any chance when they could send special forces, swat, fbi, missiles, fucking DRONES, etc

>>63314998
couldn't you have left this in the dead thread out of consideration

>>63314947

I think TJ's style much more resembles watered down version of Lomachenko's boxing, especially on dimensions of handspeed and perpendicular movement around the opponent. Look, it's a thing of beauty:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9ah4XxzzNU

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>this is meant to be one of Bellator's "tentpole" events
>nobody gives an iota of a fuck because some big name from elsewhere isn't headlining
I don't think you can really blame Scott Coker for shit like Kimbo/Ken

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>>63315242
>PLUS: Chandler & Lashley

Unless they pit them against each other I'm not interested.

>>63315386
That's what I initially thought it meant and was super confused and excited

>>63314998
>an insurgency wouldn't stand a chance against the US MIlitary
did you just wake up from a coma or something?

>>63315386
>>63315494
It's listed on their site as an exhibition bout.

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>>63315386
I'm surprised they didn't put Thompson's name on the poster at least, he's got some "oh yeah that guy" factor at least

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>>63315798
god DAMN i forgot about this!

>>63314909
he said it was a female employee, and she wasnt at the recording of the episode

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>>63315994
lol he unfired her cause she was crying, what a kek

>>63314819
So what is a "HEEM" anyway? Still can't figure that one out

>>63316025
Hardcore
Em em a
Entertain
Ment

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>>63316025
Heavy
Eastern
European
Men

Its a play on the Emelianenko brothers.

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Introducing soon to be /heem/ approved pornstar, Emma Mae

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>>63316107
>flat
>ugly
>no ass
>shitty tattoos
>Australia

>>63316107
Is she the one thats supposed to play Ronda Rousey?

I can't wait until Bloody Elbow reports Rondas moms reactions to it.

>>63316160
Yeah she looks like dogshit but her name is Emma Mae
Get it? Emma Mae? Say it out loud

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>>63316160
Son, you'd cream your pants if you heard her fart over a walkie talkie.

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>>63316266
Hey Serbro I was playing GTAV just now and came across this dude.

>>63316446
Sonofabitch, is that legit? What is it with Rockstar games and Serbia? First Niko Belić and now this? The must love the shit out of "Pretty Village Pretty Flame".

>>63316107
A black Canadian MMA tuber I used to follow named his daughter Emma Mae. This was many moons ago, but it's funny because now his daughter has the same name as a pornstar.

>>63316481
Russia's overdone and Serbia is second on the list of really shit countries in Eastern Europe

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>>63316107
She quit for a few years and only now just came back being 100% more plastic

>>63316517
my boss just yelled at me

I work graveyard at 7/11

>>63316506
Shows how familiar you are with Eastern Europe.

>>63316517
Russian in charge of giving 0 (zero) fucks for SFW boards.

>>63316546
There's a trap thread up and running, and it's not Macedonia running it

>>63316531
Yeah I'm sure the Scottish video game developers are very well informed

>>63316517
guess what i'm getting you banned

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>>63316572
Thanks for the intel, senpai

>>63316578
Judging by the effort they put in for Niko Belić, I'd guess they did their homework.

There are some things Niko says that only a serbian would say. And I'm sure no one outside of Serbia would pick up on that.

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Is there anyone else who wants to see Tony Ferguson fight Al Iaquinta? I think Iaquinta has been pretty impressive in his latest streak, and Ferguson's domination of a former Title holder was fucking spectacular. Plus when Ferguson wins, (which he probably would) it would make him look strong for a top 5 opponent.

>>63316706
I wouldn't choose Al Iaquinta over anyone else in particular really, and Masvidal beat him imo

>>63316481
they probably don't like you cause your people ruined the entire 20th century

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>>63316587
You should kill yourself instead

>>63316788
>ruined

What

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Who here /RoganWatch/ this is the funniest video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVlbgpqLyD0

>>63316706
That would be a very good fight. I've been really impressed overall with Ferguson since his TUF finale win. Really sharp fighter with some fun crafty shit he pulls out of the back pocket. I think Iaquinta's risk taking agression would get him into a lot of trouble against a lanky analytical striker like Tony, can see a clipped & subbed style ending to that.

I'm quite excited for Barboza vs Ferguson. Interested to see what kind of gameplan El Cucuy will employ in that fight.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LDrIemBN1yE

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>>63316788
Well you're welcome.

i could easily heem mcgregor to be honest.

>>63316830
I think we will see a more even version of the Thompson fight, where tony uses his reach and angles on the feet and fast unpredictable switches to wrestling to unbalance his opponent and keep him guessing, followed by pulling off the unanimous decision, or possible a surprise submission.

>>63316826
A lot of the ad segments that Callen and Schaub do on tfatk are funnier than anything I've ever seen Rogan do, stand up or otherwise.

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>>63316899
>he listens to schaubcast

>>63316706
I'd care about that fight.

>>63316922
number one show on itunes bro

>>63316947
How do you listen to Schaub stroke his own dick for 2 hours and talk out his ass on literally every subject except fighting?

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Semi-seasonal reminder that a cheeky parlay of Cummings + Henderson = literally free money.

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>>63317044
o u

Exclusive new Fighter & the Kid webm,

https://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1446621605091.webm

>people actually listen to this

>>63316981
It's the best mma related podcast out there and Callen can speak more intelligently on wider subjects where the meathead can't, also Callen's hilarious. Schaub is becoming less tolerable the more he tries to distance himself from mma though.

>>63317064
Schaub has a point and flatulence humor is comedy at its finest.

Any of you newfag underagefag fags remember that turn-based mma internet game called Cagekick or something like that? You made a dude and assigned attributes like chin, punching power, cardio. Then you'd fight other dudes. It was all ranked. I remembered knees in the clinch were OP as fuck.

>>63317125
get out nerd before i make you

>>63317130
*postures up*

Try it, bitch.

>>63316981
>every subject except fighting?

His picks are wrong close to 100% of the time.

>>63317064
>2.7 million listeners

This better be a fucking lie.

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>tfw no uglycute gf

https://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1446162061811.webm

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>tfw no WMMA mommy

>>63317391
nice. now get the post-Menne Baroni shoutfest! Ganbatte senpai!

>>63317396
>Little kid owns professional MMA fighter - must watch!

>>63317325
there's nothing cute about that

>>63317396
oh look its a ronda fight

>>63317396
What the fuck was this filled with? A calculator?

>btw that kid is going to have a bitch of an Oedipus complex what with sweaty rolling with his mommy and his dad being dead and all.

>>63317413
>I'M THE MAN
>TOLD Y'ALL I'M THE MAN
>YEAH, I'M THE BEST EVER
>THE BEST EVER
>I'M THE MAN

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWxajTkCIs4

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>>63317396
hnnnnnnngggg
>>63317470
kek

>>63316899
you either have a dank sense of humor or you need to go out more, m8

>>63317972
>reading through the entire thread and replying to old posts

Who needs to go out more?

>>63318006
scrolling through 80 posts took 30 seconds m8, your post was so shitty I had to reply
also you think callen is intelligent
you DEFINITIVELY need to talk to more people
he parrots a lot of common sensical talk, his rationalizations are subpar, everybody he hangs with calls him on his bullshit. he and brandon are even embarassed everytime they bring up the emails they receive from their dropping knowledge segment, granted, it's about hippos but that says a lot about how medriocre callen is
not hating on the guy, he has his moments
but if you enjoy his mediocre intellect and his screaming and "irony" of the ads, you do have a dank sense of humor, sorry.

>>63318006
>replying to old posts
I don't understand this meme. If a thread is active any posts in it are active t

>>63318096
>being this dumb
callens comedy is based on his stupidity

he is that goof that everyone laughs at, but he turned it around and thought; I can be stupid and get paid?

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Why do Dana and Lorenzo's fuck slaves get to design shirts for the UFC and Reebok? It's an insult to the entire fashion industry.

>>63318267
and that's HILARIOUS right?
fuck off

Why is Neil Magny so based lads?

>>63318283
rude hue

its not that he tries to be stupid, he is stupid, but his succes shows that his stupidity is amusing

If you ask why is his stupidity amusing; because it makes the listener feel superior over callen

>>63316517
>subtly placed NSFW

Get out of here heretic

(more pls)

>>63318321
hence the american audience being all over his nuts

>>63316517
That's fucking vile. Imagine sitting across from a woman at a restaurant and seeing that. Scary.

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>>63318275

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>>63318275
10/10

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>>63318275

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>>63318275

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>>63318275
>oooooh vicious ground and pound!

yuck lads

http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/2015/11/04/world/europe/ap-eu-france-gay-blood-donation.html

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>>63318483
fuck this retarded government

>>63318006
>Constantly lurking every thread so hard that any post older than a few minutes is considered 'old' and obsolete.
You.
You need to go out more.

>>63318483
Thanks France

>>63318622
>going out
90% of unsanctioned heems happen outdoors
stay safe
stay indoors
god bless

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Are YOU doing your duty and converting friends into fight fans?

>>63319019
>having friends
lmao

>>63319019
>sweden
>relevant in sports

As cringy as this is, you just gotta love Stoneclasp.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6VRixOC-Ow

>>63319069
stonegrip collecting that paycheck I see

>>63319069
top kek that was great

i forgot how bad wine tastes remind me to never take a sip again

>>63319069
he's so fucking hot

>>63319341
if you drink enough you wont notice the taste

>>63319341
You should of gotten champagne. Tastes like Sprite.

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>>63316446
fixed

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>>63319372
champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends

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>>63319407
McFuck yourself Germany :^(

>>63319341
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EY7XUT6gV4I

>lurking /heem/ all day at work mon-fri
>leave thread wherever it is on Friday pm
>come back monday and start reading again from whereever I left it on Friday
>read through all of the threads from over the weekend until I'm totally caught up

dunno what i'd do without heem to be quite perfectly honest family

>>63319452
why don't you join in on weekends lad

>>63319464
>not partying with drunken normies on weekends

>>63319473
>partying from Friday pm to Monday am without a second of /heem/

sounds like a horrible life desu senpai

>>63318611

I don't know what it is about Miesha, that face.. she just looks liek such a dirty bitch. Like she'd force you to stick your nose in her anus and sex bully you.

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>>63319531
does this look like the face of a man who gets forcefully shit on?

>>63319433
<3

>>63319531
>force you to stick your nose in her anus
>force

>>63319464

Because when I'm not at work, I'm busy traneing or being a stoned degenerate on my sofa playing ea UFC or watching Fightpiss.

Also I like having 3-4 threads to read at the start of the week. Loads more obviously when there's an event on

>>63319551
I bet he was really cute as a child. He has that aged child actor look.

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>>63319473
Not secretly lurking /heem/ while out with the normcore like a cheeky FightFan™.

>>63319551

Absolutely

>>63319559
>force

Fair point m8

>>63318483
>>63318611

A short summary of modern French history:

>krauts rekt them in two weeks
>country overrun by niggers
>mma is banned
>faggot blood is legal

bigger c

ONCE IN A LIFETIME ATHLETE
SUBLIME STRIKING TECHNIQUE
UNRIVALED DOMINATION
http://youtu.be/yKHV3KVDess

>>63319589
lol!

>>63319602
BETCH KOHAYA'S IN BIG TROUBLE

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recent pic

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>>63319708

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>>63319708
Top laugh

how can they be this bad?

>>63319708
'F**k that," McGregor told GQ UK magazine (via Daily Mail). "What do you mean interim? [UFC featherweight champion] Jose Aldo and I had a date, he didn't show, someone else took his place, I beat him, easy. So don't give me interim."

With Aldo suffering a rib injury, McGregor scored a second-round TKO win over late replacement Chad Mendes at UFC 189 in July. Rebooked to headline against Aldo Dec. 12 at UFC 194, McGregor isn't convinced he'll actually face the pound-for-pound great.

"I still don't think he will show," said McGregor. "I am trying to be optimistic but I am never wrong, I always predict the outcome of my fights and I am never wrong. I have beaten him already. He is dead. Look at his body language. His body is weak and his mind is weaker. I can smell the lack of confidence.

"If the mind is not in it, the body won't follow. He cannot beat me. He knows it. It's why he went running last time... I can hear it in his voice, I can see it in his eyes, I know when a man is beaten, and he is beaten mentally."

McGregor also discussed his eventual exit from the sport, mentioning a concern of head trauma, specifically.

"I am not stupid," said McGregor. "I am a very bright guy. I know that in the fighting game, you get people who get brain damage and do themselves long-term harm. I am into it in a big way, and I am good at it, and I am going to get very, very rich and then I will get out and we will see what comes after that."

>>63319714
>>63319716
I-I like it..

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>>63319708
>mc gregor

>>63319733
But at this point, how "good" could a T shirt be to compensate for such utter incompetence?

I don't know about you, but as for me, the shirt would have to drop me dead to make me even consider ever buying anything Reebok.

In other words, has the damage already been done?

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>>63319723
>"I am not stupid," said McGregor. "I am a very bright guy.

>>63319781

DOENT TOOTCH DEH WATCH

>>63319781
this pic has to be shooped, his upperbody looks way too small

>>63319602
>Roagn almost crying
that steve o episode was fun as fuck though

>>63319791
>>63319781

Post the other one for this fella

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>>63319708


So reebok has one mexican intern doing all their web stuff or something?

>>63319800
probably outsourcing it to an asian country like india or something

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>>63319798
>Wot're you deewin'?

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>>63319798
>>63319816

>>63319816
cool tats

>>63319791
That would take some serious photoshop skills to make it look that good, nobody posting in here has that ability

>>63319816
>>63319781
Didn't these come from some irishbro? Are these /HEEM/ exclusives?..

>>63319781
>>63319791
>>63319816
maybe he always walks around doing a lat spread when he knows he's being filmed

>>63319832
>projecting this hard

fucking zilch

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>>63319836
>Conor "Chuck Liddell" McGregor

>>63319836
Those McGregor pictures and Schaub are all we can really call our own..,

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Fuck's sake sometimes I forget he looks this bad at weigh ins

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>>63319836
>>63319843

>>63319842
No, it's just a fact. Stay insecure, dummy.

>>63319836

They are /heem/ exclusive, yes. An Ireland posted them along with a story about how he had met Conor a couple of times and how he was banging shitty hookers and doing loads of coke at some party they were at. Conor didn't want his picture taken and apparently gets testy when you try, while he's busy being a piece of shit. Hence >>63319816

>>63319857
>fact
>wrong

pick one you blithering nothing. i have more money than you'll see in your life you noncontributing zero.

>>63319843
>>63319853

And I'm l8, m8. >>63319858

>>63319852
looks like he's been out in the desert, got sand all over.

>>63319867
>muh 70 million
I understand you have this meme/gimmick you're trying to force, but nobody believes you. I personally don't find it entertaining. I just think you're dumb and don't have any concept what it is actually like to be wealthy.

>>63319870
>Potatofamine.jpg

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Does this therapy work?

>>63319878
there's no need to be upset.

>>63319908
>there is no need to be upset
I agree.

>>63319908
there's lots to be upset about in this world

>>63319921
>le dennis siver image

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>>63319927
Considering you do literally nothing about any of it you should just RELAX instead.

>>63319902
apparently good for restitution of the body.

>>63319878
>I just think you're dumb and don't have any concept what it is actually like to be wealthy.

What's it like?

>>63319902
Didn't someone chick die like a week ago from being locked into one of those?

>>63319951
I could go on for a while about how it has impacted me positively and negatively. I was born into wealth, but neither of my parents were born wealthy. I am the first generation of my family that doesn't have to get a job if I so choose. Honestly, I think it stunted my development as a person for much of my teenage years.

>>63320001
You certainly sound developmentally delayed.

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>>63319998


She mistook the cryo chamber for the isolation tank while high as fuck on alphabrain

Now that Jacare is out who will Romero fight?

>>63320074
Don't play me.

>>63320096
What are you wearing? Be honest.

>>63320111
Only a cheeky smile and a magnum condom (on my head)

Do you know your body fat percentage, /HEEM/?

Rogan's is 17%.

Mine is 19% at 5'8" and 190lbs :(

>>63320138
rogan isnt 17% unless he got fat

>>63320138
>19%
holy shit m8

and Rogan's isn't 17% lol

>>63320138
>5'8
there is no reason for you to be alive. you literally shouldn't be allowed to procreate.

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>>63318275

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>>63320167
>>63320153
He said it on a podcast recently.

>>63320198
>bald
>manlet
>compensates with drugs that are going to make him die young

>>63320198
that picture i'd say sure i can believe it.
but that pic is nearly 2 years old and his more recent his he looks far leaner.

>>63320216
>that are going to make him die young
I think that that ship has sailed.

did anyone else notice how great luke thomas' beard looked in the MMA (monday morning analyst)?

>>63320349
>tfw can't grow a beard

>>63320375
no desire to fap and balding too

i wonder if TRT will help

Schaub is so based

lol at Callen farting into the mic

>>63320375
why did you delete that?

http://youtu.be/oq_qmFk-4J8

>>63320405
that means that you are low test

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>>63320489
Is this what Rogan takes? Androgel?

>>63320545
you can buy testosterone receipe free in burgerland?

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>>63320565
You can get some free and legally in Germany as well.

Order from Serbia. Galenika made testosterone.

>>63320545
injecting test will just make you more bald, you need several hormones to prevent that and gyno development

your body converts test to something else which promotes bodyhair growth and balding, which leaves you with less test. You can prevent that from happening from buying antibalding drugs, but it can kill your dick

>>63320587
How do I not give myself bitch tits? Need to stack it with an estrogen blocker or something?

>>63320603
The fuck do I know. I only used dianabol for a brief period before a fight once like 3-4 years ago. I have no clue about cycling anabolics.

But if you go to /fit/ I'm sure that after the high-horse patronizing someone will come along and fill you in.

>>63320444
He probably got banned t

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reminder that if you aren't currently competing in a WADA regulated sport there is literally no reason not to do steroids

don't you want to become based?

>>63320603
you need to inject estrogen-like hormones so the ratio between the amount of test and estrogen stays stable

>>63320640
how did you feel when you were onnit?

>>63320603
take nolva or clomid. might need HCG too

>>63320654
lmao he's only 26? Such shit genetics, he looks 40

If schaub doesnt fight anymore why is his show the fighter and the kid?

thats false advertising, lying.

>>63320706
Being a fighter isn't a profession, it is a calling. A true fighter is a fighter for life, regardless of career.

>>63320669
Everything used to piss me the fuck off and I wouldn't gas. Those are the only two symptoms that were really evident.

I do believe that such short cycles are useful for guys getting their first amateur fights in.

>>63320717
Schaub is a true fighter?

>>63320349
he's handsome as fuck
I'm not into grey haired man but his hairstyle is sooooo good

https://instagram.com/p/75mbHXBPQ1/

>>63320734
>I'm not into grey haired men

Prematurely grey with a young face is fantastic.

>>63320730
Yes.

>>63320719
Did you inject that shit?

>>63320599
i don't even get horny, also i already have permanent breasts from antipsychotic drugs thanks though bro

>>63320790
Nah, its a heart shaped pill.

who /grabbing one of these ironically/ before they're removed from the store due to public backlash and ridicule here?

http://www.ufcstore.com/search/Discipline

>>63320797
I have literal B cups from Risperdal/Zyprexa.

Working out actually makes it worse because the breasts just stand out more than when i weigh more uniformly

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>>63320797
Can you post pics? A-Asking for a friend and scientific purposes

>>63320719
>dbol
>wouldn't gas
literally what? dbol has nothing to do with endurance, if anything you're going to cramp your shit up doing cardio on dbol.

>>63320824
i literally can't i don't have a camera/phone

>>63320816
kek. where did you buy that? I should have known that before my first amateur fight

>>63320836
You got me. I didn't gas. Granted I never had much of a gas tank issue, but I worked noticeably harder while on that.

>>63320797
1. get surgery
2. increase pectoral mass

>>63320866
From our coach. The better we did, the more money the gym got from the union and theres no testing so he made the extra effort. I wonder ho much they cost.

>>63320891
>get surgery

I would have already, but I can't stop taking this class of medication until something else comes out.

>>63320916
lel its always the coach

at my old kickboxing gym the coach would feed everyone several types of roids, after a while it got shutdown because of this

>>63320939
you should consider losing some weight

>>63320866
dbol is the stuff arnold ate like candy back in the day iirc

>>63320939
m8...

>>63320939
lol that's way worse than mine

>>63320952
>losing weight on antipsychotics

nothing makes you gain weight and look like shit faster and harder. holy shit i'm "perfect" about diet and exercise and i don't look good. i went from 185 to 255 in a couple months when i first went on them and wasn't diet/exercising

>>63320820

I had to take resperdal/resperadone for a while. I didn't get tits.

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>>63320939
BREHS

>>63320939
I PUKED IN MY MOUTH A LITTLE

>>63320939

I can't even desu senpai

>>63320992
Good for you. The company has a multi-billion dollar settlement over the drug's side effects.

Why were you taking it?

>>63320952
>its always the coach

It kinda figures. None of us had a clue about peds before him. Interestingly enough he got closed down, but not because the cops figured his scheme out, but because he owed a lot of money from the kind of people you never-ever borrow money from. I literally have no idea where he is now. No one has seen him in like 2 years.

Weird.

>>63320349
>>63320734
are you people serious or is this like schaubposting?

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>>63320939
m-m8...

>>63321019
The issue isn't over the side effects it's that they lied about them.

So, now that mangy is in to fight Gastelum, who should Stephen Thompson fight at 195?

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>2004
>When Almeida was 13

Good job jewfc

>>63320939
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCvRqJDQD4k

Who eating /500g of lowfatquark on the daily/ for dem lean gaynz here?

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Guise, I feel bad about our resident Billy Paulson.

>>63321070
me

ive been eating quark daily for several years now

>>63321060
Tarec?

>>63321063
>1:54-2:00
Best part of the video

>>63321093
Rory?

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>>63320939

Why is everyone picking on the fatty? I'm sure she is well aware of how she looks already. There is no need to be a bully about it.

>>63321019

I smoked an ounce of hash a week, started getting a bit weird and thought all my friends where plotting against me,

>weed is harmless

>>63321063
my favorite:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BtCJKPxtVJ8

>>63321211
So drug induced psychosis?

Literally the only reason you should be put on the medication is if you have schizophrenia.

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>>63321205
>she

>>63321254

if I hadn't gotten help when I did I'd have went full blown schizo

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>>63321205

>she

>>63321268
I know what you're getting at, but AFAIK you can't get schizophrenia from doing drugs. It can cause temporary psychosis/exacerbate the symptoms of pre-existing schizophrenia.

Schizophrenia can be diagnosed with brain imaging. It's not a meme like "ADHD."

>>63321254
>>63321311

Cannabis can trigger schizophrenia in people predisposed to the disease.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4033190/

>>63321326
>believing things

livechat with c

>>63321311
Doesn't schizophrenia manifest by a busted pre frontal cortex? What if you have a predisposition and you ruin your brain with some serious battery acid level shit?

If you can induce nightmares I figure you can induce severe psychosis.

>>63321326
Yeah. I'm living proof of that. Smoking a tiny bit will make me believe hitting myself in the head with a hammer will make me win the lottery, and I'll hear people conspiring to kill me through the TV and vents in the walls for a week.

Dear Boobsbro,

I'd just like you to know that I have chosen not to save your picture with the intent of making fun of you in later heem threads.

If it makes you feel better that at least one person wont, m8.

>>63321395
you'll need to be a real autist to save his picture

>>63321391
yes but the treatment isn't schizophrenia medication

it's to come off of whatever is inducing the symptoms

>>63321424
Interesting, I wonder if Russians are testing this.

>>63321326
smoking weed can make you paranoid as fuck.

>>63321422
I think you'd be surprised.

>>63321391
If you have schizophrenia your brain is going to deteriorate over time regardless.

To be clear, you can permanently "lose your mind" from enough drug abuse, but I don't believe you can specifically develop schizophrenia.

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>>63320939


oh jeeshushhh...

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>>63318246
>>63318824
mfw it ain't me(starts playing) that replied to this >>63317972 post

>>63318096
Callen is well read and is very smart *for a comedian* and is very funny *for an mma podcaster* whilst Brendan is pretty funny *for a fighter*, it's a good balance. If you're so above listening to tfatk you wouldn't have been able to make any of the criticisms you made.

You literally help based Schaub and based Callen tell dick jokes for a living just so you can hate them for being able to do so.

tip. top. kekkles.

>tfw wondered if I was anywhere close to masturbating 10000 times in my lifetime
>tfw worked out I had my first wank 4990 days ago
>tfw absolutely smashed the 10k milestone

I don't really know how to feel about this

>>63321725
i could never jerk off twice in one day

>>63321697
Dude, we've seen your tits ITT
I'm literally laughing at you

>>63321747
have done twice back to back without losing my erection before

think my record in a day was 5 and I fell asleep with my cock in my hand on the last one

>>63321779
you need to get a life

>>63321801
Don't we all? It's almost like you aren't aware of the type of person that frequents this site.

>>63321779
impressive t6h

>>63321818
yes but what he just stated is pathetic even compared to the average anon

>>63321867
Breh, you just had a conversation with a roided up schizo that has a hard-on for MMA and a frequent masturbator is what raises a red flag for you?

M8, lettuce be reality pls.

is /heem/ the only general that literally has no tripfags?

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Ok lads we actually have a proper Hump Day/HEEM Day TV schedule tonight.

In 6 bongs, there's a new episode of Unleashed featuring Middleweights on FS1.
In 7 bongs, UFC Tonight is on FS1
In 8 bongs, there's a new episode of Kingdom while FS1 reruns the Snake in the Grass episode of TUF
In 9 Bongs, the new TUF airs

Never change, /heem/

>>63321952
Who needs tripfags when we have flags and americans that are so autistic they can spot individual posters by their writing style?

>>63321965
nobody cares about tuf anymore we just wanted to see the push

Live chat with kek Thomas is live
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=aH3IaO3lYp4

>>63321981
kek its kinda true the flags are basically usernames

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of all the shitposting I've done in just this thread alone let alone through a year and a half of heem, and this is what I get b& for?

thank senpai the kek meme is over

>>63322003
the fight in this episode will be fun

>>63322050
we have a faggot american janitor that posts in /heem/
he bans you for anything he doesn't like
a shame, really

>>63322003
I care. I wanna see if le tourettes man can 50/50 his way to a TUF trophy.

>>63322213
Good thing ban evasion is so simple it really just neuters mods of any power

https://instagram.com/p/9qVcekIWln/
vitor looks like he lost even more muscle

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WcGjmRXA0xc
So the guy who hilariously KOd Shinya Aoki in a gimmick fight that one time is going to be facing some shitboxer called Andy Souwer at Rizin

>>63322230
I know I should be rooting for /team immigrant/, but I want that spastic cripple maker to win so bad!

>>63322357


That's the guy who wears a schoolgirl outfit and comes in to anime songs isn't it?

He's a kickboxer too, I think Souwer has rekt him in K-1 before.

>>63322397
I think the natural inclination to dislike America has been overridden by team Europe having a lot of douchebags on their team and being coached by the king of the douchebags

Wtf did the guy post that made everyone respond like that?

>>63322050
>>63322282
This janitor is on a power trip. He is getting people banned with no justification. He is so bad that it is defeating the purpose of posting here.

>>63322542
he posted his fat body, but he had the worst case of gyno. Like C-cups

>>63322542
The guy has side effect from drugs he's been taking. I can't remember which ones they are, but his body seems strangely odd. Gyno for one.

I honestly feel bad for the guy. I wish there was a way we could help him out.

>>63321725
You remember the exact day you first jacked off? impressive
Also, do you really average more than twice a day?
Damn. I guess there's a reason you brits call each other wankers

>>63322572
>>63322624
Daym, I guess he has to make some money and lose some weight

>>63322658
was quite easy for me to remember, night before my 13th birthday

pretty much everyone at my school had beards and lost their virginity and I hadn't even cum for the first time yet so I pounded like fuck the night before I was a teenager and had the leg shakes and everything. First wet dream was that night too

and yes I'm a wankaholic, even if I have a shag I go home the next day and wank like fuck to it as soon as I walk through the door whilst it's fresh in the memory

>>63322677
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyjhiLm7d4I

>>63322050
Honestly, I'm thinking about writing to our heavenly sovereign to have him deal with this rogue

>>63322050
That's pretty fucked up

Why do people care if the janitor deletes off topic posts? We are here to discuss mma. Also, nothing gets deleted unless somebody else reports it.

>>63322050
Okay, this might be the most ludacris b& yet.

>>63322768
>Why do people care if the janitor deletes off topic posts?
wasn't off topic

>Also, nothing gets deleted unless somebody else reports it.
this is a lie, you must be him

>>63322768
Britbro was talking about a jon jones reebok shirt, that's hardly unrelated. Yesterday I got b& for making a travis-ronda-edmond greentext

>>63322768
Ought to report you for that off topic comment.

Lawler Rory wasn't that good

>>63322768
Discussing crap-tier UFC and Reebshit fighter t shirts isn't on topic now?

I'm gonna need those guidelines breh.

>>63322768
You probably are the mod. Anyway there is a janitor/mod who regularly posts in /heem/ and he's made an already over-moderated general even worse.

3 day ban for what the UK posted above is fucking bullshit and is now the norm (which literally isn't even off topic, not that it should warrant a ban even if it was).

You're either the moderator himself, or just a stupid ill-informed fuck "oh it hasn't affected me directly so who cares a herpa derp"

>>63322795
>>63322816
>>63322814
>>63322811
>>63322836
Well, I guess sometimes people make mistakes. You can't restore a deleted post, but he is free to make it again. Ultimately, it is better to have some moderation than to just let everybody treat this like a chat room though. We are better with the janitors than without...

>>63322856
hi janitor

>>63322856
not him confirmed

nice try, fooled this guy anyway >>63322878

I'm going to 8-

>>63322856
7/10

>>63322856
So it's you

I honestly think Frankie Edgar isn't as good as some people think he is

>>63322856
Please kill yourself. Please.

>>63322856
>amerikek being supportive of abusive law enforcement
Nice

>>63322894
Nahh man

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>>63322856
Maybe this place is more your style, homo

>>63323085
like I want to get open an AmEx account dezoo

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>mfw I want janitors to leave /heem/ forever

When is JDS fighting next?

>>63323318
fighting Reem lad

>>63323337
>implying I don't know already

I just wrote it to post something "mma related" since this trigger happy janishit is on duty.

>>63323384
I did wonder <3

hmm that's not very mma related

I like to watch mixed martial arts.

The best thing about being an American is that I can have everybody mad at me and then go right back to being a regular anon!

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>>63322856
i bet you are a manlet, a ban just for talking about something related to MMA is absurd

>>63323427
>I like to watch mixed martial arts.

This is getting retarded.

WMMA should be banned.

fuck the janitors and the mods

I'm looking forward the UFC cards throughout December and January.

Nick Diaz is one of my favourite fighters

All janitors should fucking burn

It's pretty much confirmed I am the only fight fan with good physique on here now?

So uh, how about those old dudes who are getting ready to fight this weekend?

Janitor pls no buli

>>63323555

Nah farm

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>>63323508
>secondly im not on a "powertrip" im just doing what I was told to do

Do you, by any chance, have a german ancestors?

>>63323555
you're the same height as Dominick Cruz though lmao

>>63323555
can confirm. seen u on /fit/.

>>63322856
Gringo marica