/britfeel/

>>39623128
why is anal the comfiest porn lads?

I had an emo gf when I was 13 but I dumped her because she was embarrassing to be around. She ended up with big tits and and fat butt so I regret it kind of.

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>TFW 5'0 slim goff gf

I'm a bit like the anon in the last thread who found photos of his mum on her computer. But the ones of my mum weren't tasteful at all. There were about 150 photos of her getting fucked. Some of them were anal, a lot of close ups, a lot of cum shots on the face. A few of the guys were black and one of them was a paki.

>>39623160
did you ever confront her?

>>39623149
Slight degradation and most of the time you can look at her pussy while she's being fucked, best of both worlds matey

>>39623147
just post one please lad

>>39623164
No. I didn't say a single word about it. I just never touched her computer again.

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why do i keep coming to this board if i have a gf and social life? is it just that i still feel disconnected from everything going on around me?
>tfw go out most weekends with friends and have a mostly nice time but get myself stupidly wankered every time to forget the dumb shit i do

>>39623160
I've had my mums tits on the mind after looking through her bras

>>39623168
I'm paranoid that they're on some nude """art""" website somewhere and one of you autists is going to find them, find my mum and tell her about this.

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O-O-ORDERRRR! 18

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>>39623147
>>39623160
fhjjy
do you want to fuck her

>>39623208
That's not her at all. I'm not posting pictures of her.

>>39623201
put some squiggles and shapes on it so it doesn't show up on images
or just cover half of it

please lad

>>39623201
sensible lad

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>How did England get so white?

why is spoons the only pub a can bring myself to go in now? why am a such a cheap riddy?

>>39623224
There's fucking mountains of milf porn out there for you. I just wanted to tell a story of how I found nudes of my mum is all.

>>39623226
Thank you

>>39623200
Just ask her nicely if you can see her breasts after she's had some wine. I did this and my mum said yes and even let me touch them while she was giggling. She never let me do it again, but once was enough.

What's the best style and why is it yotsuba

>>39623235
>your tax money at work

>>39623251
>after she's had some wine
Women on alcohol are unpredicatable. She might fly off into a hysteric rage and kick him out of the house.

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>>39623126
Good call lad I forgot about german shepherds, great breed. My mate had a belgium shepherd and it was such a loyal, friendly dog

>>39623251
hot
get her more drunk

>>39623261
I don't mean full on wasted, I just mean two glasses to lower the inhibition a bit.

>>39623254
Tomorrow is clearly the insomniacs choice of theme, and therefore /britfeel/'s choice of theme.

>>39623272
Still, risky

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>>39623208
MUMMY GIVE MILKY NOW

2nd pic is best by far

>>39623254
>>39623275
>no forest green options

>>39623280
Yeah obviously you need to size up your mum's personality.

>>39623251
>She never let me do it again
did you try twice?

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>>39623294
i wont 2 lik ur vagoogoo mummi

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>>39623275
Only one I will use lad.

>>39623282
Christ that pic looks like it was made in 2009 by an Indian basement dweller

>>39623308
Yeah I tried a second time the following weekend and she just went "That was a one off, don't ask again" so I didn't.

>>39623319
Maybe poleaboo is posting without his trip.

>>39623333
Kevs confirm it so.

>>39623251
my mum doesn't drink wine and she doesn't drink that often, I have just thought about asking her to she what happens but I'm not ready to sleep rough if it massively backfires

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>>39623319
>not understanding post-irony
I feel for you plebs

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>>39623128
>Tfw no goth gf.
Lad, I got in so much shit over a goth qt I tried ending everything .
still want a goth gf[/

is the stereotype of everyon here being fat and ugly valid? i always assume that everyone is like myself
>7/10, good haircut, kinda weird clothing but can be fashion

>>39623352
>post irony
Ok, so that's what you call it. I didn't have a word for it and I was just blown away by how good it is.

>>39623353
This is exactly why men are the stupidest creatures

>>39623349
There's a lad who used to post here who tried it on with his mum and she kicked him out. He had to go and live with his grandmother and then he tried it on with her too and ended up homeless.

>>39623364
Ugly skeleton here. Suppose the stereotype is always at least half true.

>7/10
Everyone rates themselves as 7/10, and most people massively overrate themselves.

>>39623386
I remember that, did he try it with is gran as well? wow.

http://maps.nls.uk/geo/explore/side-by-side/#zoom=5&lat=56.0000&lon=-4.0000&layers=176&right=osm


doing an autism

>>39623370
Aye lad, it's a great defence. Whenever someone calls you an idiot just say you're being post-ironic and they're too dumb to understand you

>>39623128
goth gf is good but she's mental, has mental breakdowns getting dressed and doing makeup, woken up to her watching me sleep, think she'd kill me/her/both if i left

>not that i want to

Got the platinum trophy on Persona 5, took slightly over 1 month

Time to find a new distraction

>>39623395
Yeah he tried it with his gran too. Same exact "fake massage" technique even. He was in a homeless shelter for a bit and then his normie brother helped him get into a flat.

>>39623391
i have been with a fair amount of people and never been called ugly/felt i was creeping anyone out, i have a standard handsome face so throw in some fashionably messy hair, regular exercise and a taste in media and art that is weird enough to be exciting to normies but still accessible

coasting on easy mode up in here, friend group functioning enough that i would never admit to visiting this site

>>39623409
>tfw someone says im dumb for not understanding post-irony
>they dont realise im being post-post-ironic

>>39623391
A good rating system is to take away 1 or 2 from whatever you would give yourself when looking in a mirror. I'd say I'm a 6 when looking at myself in the mirror, but in reality I'm a 5/10.

>>39623381
Pretty much it is.
Well never learn. Or I know I won't.
So badly want to go back and smash that ass.

>>39623445
I think I'm a 4, does that make me a 2?

>>39623427
maybe it aint worth trying then, I don't want all that. I just wanted to see her bobs

>>39623463
you can't be less than 5 without some kind of abstract deformity
acne or scars don't count

>>39623463
your lack of any confidence makes you a 2, either that or your awful features i guess

>>39623463
Most likely a 3 imo.

>>39623483
5 is average. 50% of people are 5 or below.

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gf always shows me videos and stuff of cats, accidentally laughed when she showed me the latesrt croydon cat killer news

>mfw don't give a fuck about cats

>>39623446
No offence lad but do you love your gf/wife? You've got a kid on the way too, you can't be thinking of shit like this

>what doesn't kill you makes you stronger

must be the worlds strongest man at this point.

>not the worlds strongest man

hate normie gays

simple as

something's got to give or i'll be dead soon

>>39623523
>croydon cat killer
ive become strangely obsessed with this bloke recently, cant stop reading about him

>>39623491
Well I have a large nose, bad skin, weak chin, ill-fitting clothes, haven't shaved in 2 weeks, haven't had a haircuit in 6/8 weeks. I also rarely leave the house so i have pale skin too.

>>39623540
hate faggots, simple as
they need to go

>>39623540
>Prision gay scum

>>39623559
hate people, simple as
human extermination when

>>39623525
Course I do. It's why I'm not gonna do it.
I love my wife and want to spend forever with her.
The goth is just a I don't know sexual attraction thing/excitement thing. It's why I'm not gonna risk everything over her.

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Look at this shit I just saw on Reddit, fuck me that site truly is cancer, but of context, this post is someone unironically bragging (honestly) about being smooth on tinder, reads like parody

>>39623208
who is this? I have to know

>>39623588
>ching chong cell service
They're chinese give them a break

>>39623558
no sympathy
shave
cut your hair
buy some clothes that make you look like a hipster and then boom your ugly features and "down to earth" and desirable. maybe

>>39623580
Just tell the goth to be a bit more discreet and don't bring her to your flat, that was your mistake. You need to shag her in a hotel during the day.

>>39623463
If you're a 4 in the mirror then you're a 2 in real life

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>>39623588
>le so randumb xD

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>>39623588
>88
nice dubs there lad

want to cycle london-brighton but the weather is getting grim

>>39623628
>cycling
Dumb sissy white boi.

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>>39623128
surprise surprise 193

Away to get drunk and eat fatty foods lads, see you around 1am as per

>>39623639
t. Mohammed Rashidun, 2004 toyota avensis

>>39623611
Or I just don't do it lad.
>Hotel
Lad c'mon like j could do that. Especially the sleazy rent for an hour room ones we have here.

>>39623424
Do you still play hearthstone poley?

>>39623657
Doesn't have to be a sleazy hotel, a premier inn is cheap enough.

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>tfw no bf

also haven't been on r9k in ages totally forgot about the robot

>>39623657
Give it a go. Otherwise you won't look cool in front of /britfeel/.

>>39623680
Paying 39 quid for a shag.
It's just not the same when you gotta pay.

Plus I have a car.

>>39623702
>Wanting to look cool for /britfeel/
Lad, this place wanks to ugly mean in stockings and a guy who lives in a mouldy room.

>>39623639
You have to go back, Paco
BACK

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>people encouraging him to cheat on his pregnant wife
You people sicken me

>>39623731
Better than losing your wife again and ending up trying to hang yourself. 39 quid is a cheap price to avoid that.

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>>39623128
>Smug September Special

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sister sent me this

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>>39623700
ChikaXYou

>>39623777
I don't believe you. even with trips

>>39623762
>I come to 4chan to white knight roasties

You sicken me

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>>39623781
>>39623700
Friendly reminder in case it wasn't obvious enough

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>>39623799
Posting ships isn't roleplaying, Rasheed.

>>39623790
>wanting to risk the wellbeing of your child for the sake of some used up goth pussy

>>39623766
Or again I just don't do it. No risk no trouble.

>>39623777
Post set or name pls

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>>39623781
Chika cucks You though. Youshiko is the only canon ship.
>>39623799
fight me

>>39623777
>filename
Nah pal. Looks like a solid cum dumpster though, name?

>>39623815
>Giving a fuck about a pregnant used up roastie who has probably shagged 50 chads yet is shocked that he'd shag one goth girl.

https://nhentai.net/g/190616/

Why the fuck do I have an erection

>>39623821
Ok lad, if you want to be a cuck that's your business

>>39623822
Think I found it lad. Tilde tier legs and bum, nice tits at least
https://www.instagram.com/p/BYpSrIUFH0-/?hl=en&taken-by=purrblind

>>39623827
Here lad calm down lad. My wife ain't a a slag mate.

>>39623235
WE WUZ REGENCY ENGLAND N SHIET

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>autistic normie brother listening to loud Irish nationalist music
>now playing muslim prayer music

Might go to the shop desu, it's too loud

>>39623827
Are you unable to read? I'm talking about his child not his wife

>>39623852
You think she doesn't have a past from before she met you?

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>>39623824
>Youshiko
Maybe if they actually interact alone in S2.

>>39623824
Depends, are you obese? You might just crush me with your 100kg of lard, if not I'll break your fucking bones

>>39623865
If his child is a boy then yeah you have a good point. If his child is a girl then fuck that roastie cunt, deserves what she gets.

>>39623846
>take photos in a bikini or underwear
>slap on a wig
>call it cosplay
Why do roasties do this?

>>39623860
counter it with some tunes of your own lad

>>39623884
Because women are memes anon

>cosplayer || meme || gay?? || magical girl ur local barista

>Sakulard seething

my head is still bleeding after 2 days, fuck going to the docs

>>39623866
I know she hasn't banged 50 lads. She says 3 so by the mathematics that's 9 guys.

>>39623860
Tilde do you have that sexy in-between tranny voice yet?

Lads some house down the road is blasting ISIS music and now they're playing nightcore too, should I ask them to turn it down?

>>39623846
Cheers lad, good work.
>>39623884
Because it's great wank material.

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>>39623876
soon...
>>39623879
I'm not fat m8. Pls don't break any of my bones

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>>39623860
Print this out and slip it under his door

>>39623905
Nah he probably sounds like a builder. He's got the hands for it

>>39623912
I will tie you up and snap you in two you little twink

>>39623649
Cillaposter, I need your seed for my sweet flower!
Please! I want you in me. Impregnate and infect me with your mighty rod, and let me suck on your delicate, shrivelled woman nipples.

>>39623884
Because women love attention. They infiltrate men's spaces to make themselves the centre of attention.

Cosplay, gaming, comics ect have always had a small female represention. They loved the source material and enjoyed themselves just as the men did. A rare breed indeed.

Now they have been overrun with stacies looking for validation with the minimal possible effort. Namely, putting on a bikini and a cheap wig and calling it cosplay while hundreds of people clamor to tell them how sexy they are.

>>39623904
So she's allowed to get passed around by 9 chads? Statistically at least one of them will have had a much bigger cock than you, and you're fine with that?

She probably got spitroasted/bukkake'd by two lads at once, taken it up the arse, cum all over her face and you're just sitting there and taking it, but you shag one girl and suddenly you're the devil and you have to commit suicide?

Ultimate cuck.

>>39623938
If he ever leaves Gregg's he can help tarmac my drive with those strong hands of his.

Is it possible to kill yourself inside a psych ward?

>>39623700
So, tell me about yourself.
Interests? Hobbies? Appearance? Ambitions? Likes/dislikes?

>>39623981
This isn't a dating forum, you faggots need to piss off

>>39623522
That's not how it works
It's like school grades - you need at least 50% to pass, anything under that is various degrees of failure

>>39623966
>he doesn't know his Damon lad lore
He's already cheated on his wife with this goth gf and it almost broke them apart. Now he wants to do it again because he's a bit of an idiot but he knows it's wrong so he won't. Right lad?

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>>39623951
o-ok no fight pls

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>>39623884
>Get some cheap wigs and premade cosplays
>Take some selfies on instagram
>Upload a few risque pics until you get that viral one
>Wait to you get 10k followers
>Start a patreon were you hint you'll do even lewder things
>Made around a grand a month from horny betas wearing cheap stuff from ebay and teasing your ass/pussy

>>39624018
It's satire mate.

>ask him why he listens to Irish nationalist music
>starts shouting that it's unionist and calls me an IRA sympathiser

>>39623890
Don't have any speakers or anything, he'd probably make fun of me. If we go out in public he asks me if every east asian person is my bf/gf. Don't want to make it worse

>>39623905
It's quiet. Ebin has heard it and said it was cute if that counts for anything. I've been mistaken as a roastie at work too so it can't be that bad

>>39624067
Ebin hasn't seen a real woman besides his mum since he was 16. He can't be used as evidence.

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>>39623963
This is very true. It's sad that they're ruining our hobbies and people are going along with it because 'hurr durr tits'. They had everything else in the world, they just had to go and take the last few things that we had to ourselves.

>>39624067
Ebin's just desparate for that tranny boipuss

>>39624084
He goes out all the time lad. He talked about how he saw a couple of young women out on one of his walks and he tried imagining sexual things with them but it wouldn't work. Genuine homo

>>39624067
>if that counts for anything
It doesn't, Ebin's an orbiter who likes to think he's different from other betas. You probably sound alright in general though.

>>39624115
That is rather odd.

>>39624124
>ebin
>beta

I don't think this is true. I've heard him say lots of alpha stuff, he's probably the most alpha on /britfeel/

>>39623128
Lads, I'm considering doing A-levels (at 18)
Could you post your GCSE and A-level results (and whether you revised a lot or a little) so I know where I fall in.

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>>39624184
>small phimosis willy
>can barely get an erection
>only cums two twiny spurts
Here's the TRUE alpha male of britfeel

>>39624208
Why not try your best and achieve your full potential instead of worrying about how much revision others did?

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>>39624184
Yes the boy who came to fame because he s-stutter posted with an anime girl avatar about wanting to suck Jun's willy and have everyone bully his cheese dick oozes alpha and testosterone .

>>39623523
>>39623555
This real post soucres
lads

>>39624237
Because there is no point in me trying if I'm not going to succeed.

fucking thunderstorm just came out of nowhere heavy rains and thunders for me
COMFY
O
M
F
Y

>>39624273
Where are you lad

i don't like thunder ;_;

>>39624282
east anglia laddddo

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>>39624282
Want a cuddle me lad?

What the fuck is going on with this weather up North lads?

I'm in Bury, and every hour it's like a fucking monsoon, then it stops, then it's sunny, then it fucking hammers it down again

>>39624308
The pikey God is angry with his lack of offerings

>>39623995
He's fucking complaining about it, fag. This kind of comment is best because it either shuts them the fuck up or gives me a bf.

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>>39624296
Sheeeee I'm in Surrey but that's still too close for comfort
>>39624302
Yes, exactly like in that image, rub my ears and kiss my head until I go to sleep

>>39624208
GCSE's I never revised for and got C's in everything but got a B in english and maths.
Never revised for my A-levels and I got U's in them, apart from my BTEC which I got a distinction in.

>>39624308
Nothing here in Stoke. Just the usual rainy shit.

>>39624359
I thought saku was the only faggot desperate enough to chase down every cock that posts an anime girl

>>39624208
GCSEs: 0
A levels:
Street smarts: 100%

>>39624387
>Surrey
4 hours is a bit of a drive to kiss your neck and cuddle you matey.

>>39624208
Revised one day before the exams for GCSE, got mostly A's, an A* and a couple of B's.

Revised like a madman at A-level and got AAA.

>>39624408
>Tfw brother use to say ' you're book smart, but lack common sense'.
>Tfw he got a bird pregnant who left him and stopped him seeing his kid.
Who's the smart cunt now lad?

still not decided on a cereal
might just say fuck it and buy a 48 pack of weetabix

>>39624427
Not if I'm paying, I'm sure we can come to some kind of arrangement

Lads how easy is the driving theory test?

Shredded wheat always gave me diarrhoea as a kid so I'd ask my parents to buy shredded wheat when I wanted a day off school

>>39624134
Wait are you meant to be able to get hard from imagining sex with random girls?

>>39624464
I don't want money. I just want a qt long term bf to cuddle and maybe do lewd things with.

>>39624466
Piece of piss if you revise plenty beforehand. Get one of those practise CDs and keep doing the mock tests until you can pretty much memorise the answers.

That being said it took me three attempts, but I fuck up under pressure

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Normies absolutely disgust me.

Whenever I see them I feel intense anger and hatred.

Who else?

>>39624502
Not hard per se but feelings of arousal. This can be a mental feeling as well as physical. The lack of both is unusual for a man of his age.

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>>39624509
And yet you won't travel 4 hours for it

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>>39624523
I'm a failed normie. It's a special kind of hell.

>>39624547
I'll only travel 4 hours if I'm sure it'll last long term. In which case I'll travel 4 hours every weekend.

>>39624554
same tbqh

I just couldn't stand their fucking lifestyle. Parties, drinking, drugs, promiscuity

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>>39624523
I'm starting to feel a sense of narcissistic disdain whenever I see normies. I can't help but feel superior to them

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>>39624569
m-me too...
ducking robot ree

>>39624544
What is arousal meant to feel like?

>>39624573
They're like subhumans to me.

Do yourself a favour and start reading, working out and eating healthy. Then you'll truly be superior to normalscum
>>39624603
lets kill them all anon

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>Downloaded watcher 1 on pc and have no idea how the countries work..

>>39624628
*controls

>>39624628
Dumb sissy NEET boi

>>39624628
Countries?
Stream it for us lad

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>>39624622
No thanks psycho anon...

Straight after eating I always feel sick, every time.
It usually lasts for about 30 minutes and then I'll either throw up or diarrhea
Every time I eat.

I think it might be crohns disease, waiting to see if it goes away on its own but it's quite horrible

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>>39624622
I've been watching Varg's videos a lot lately. I'd really like to go innawoods and start a large, white family. But I'll probably never meet a traditional woman with good values who wants to better her race and live like humans were meant to

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>>39624086
Exactly lad. We used to play this table game my mates and I invented. Think D&D but set in ancient Rome and we were a band of mercenaries, lame as fuck I know but we enjoyed having a few joints and geeking out for a few hours every week.

One week one of the lads brings his mrs, within 2 months we stopped playing because she would come with him every week and start complaining about how boring it was after about 10-15 minutes. We told her that each session takes hours. She still turned up every week and complained like fuck, Also started calling everything sexist and stupid and that we couldn't do stuff like going to brothels in game because it was offensive to women.

>>39624646
controls are fucking stupid.

>>39624684
There's a casual option that lets you just use mouse. The combat is shit either way, you're not missing much.

>>39624664
>I think it might be crohns disease
Crohn's is almost always diagnosed between age 10 and 15. Your probably don't have it.
Do you have intense, sharp stomach pain? Rectal bleeding? Weight loss?

>>39624657
Please anon, It'll be fun
>>39624677
Every single 'nice' girl I've met has turned out to be the same as the other stupid Stacys.

All they care about is feeling good and having fun.

>>39624677
You're delusional if you think she'd be interested in you even if you did meet one.

>>39624705
>intense, sharp stomach pain? Rectal bleeding? Weight loss?
Not him but yeah I have that.... Also near constant runny shits, barely get any warning and there is blood in there like 50% of the time when it is not complete liquid.

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I wish we had bidets in this country. I really like being naked in my own home but I'm tired of either having to take a shower or put my underwear back on after taking a shit. I've already had two shits today and I've washed my arse each time so I could continue being naked and comfy, but now I need another shit.

>>39624693
Yeah, I've already given up after 5mins, waste of dl

>>39624731
Are you one of those people that plays/reads something for 5 min then just goes back to 4chan for hours on end?

>>39624729
You ever considered toilet paper?

>>39624706
Yeah even the women that aren't immediately slutty will still fuck you over eventually
>>39624723
You're probably right, I don't have any alpha qualities like Varg does. It's natural selection I guess, my bloodline is destined to end with me.

>>39624728
>Also near constant runny shits, barely get any warning and there is blood in there like 50% of the time when it is not complete liquid
That sounds more like ulcerative colitis than Crohn's disease. I have ulcerative colitis and it only gets worse if you don't treat it. Please please please see a doctor about this.

>>39624758
Toilet paper wipes the shit off your arse, it doesn't make it clean

>>39623263
i have a german/belgium shep cross anon, would recommend

>>39624745
not really.
I played skryim for hours.
I do read, find it easy to read when traveling or waiting for x to finish.

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>>39624758
If you got shit on your arm would you put it under high pressure water or rub it with dry paper?

>>39624807
If it was my own shit? I'd just wipe it off with dry paper. It's actually happened to me quite a lot.

>>39624766
I've got an appointment at gp's next week mate. if it is ulcerative colitis, what is it like living with it?

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>>39624837
Mate you're rank

>>39624729
I know what you mean. It's when you start using them you can never go back to paper and when you do you always feel dirty.

>>39624859
Everyone wipes their arse with toilet paper so what's the difference between doing that and wiping your arm?

If I am rank so is 99% of the population.

Can't believe all these pakis here who are against toilet paper...

>>39624837
Savages like you need to be put down

>>39624843
I've had it for a year. When you're off meds it's awful, wanted to kill myself. Going to the bathroom up to 20 times per day, being bedridden because of abdominal pain, losing huge amounts of weight because my appetite is non-existant.

Luckily it's very treatable. Short term, prednisolone is like a miracle drug that makes me forget I even have the disease. You shouldn't be on it for long though because it has awful side-effects. Long term, you'll probably be put on mesalazine and have to stay on it for the rest of your life.

>>39624879
Because it's on your arm, which is uncovered. You're at least wearing underwear over your arsehole you disgusting dick

>>39624859
Try baby wipes. Makes your arse tingle

>>39624879
>If I am rank so is 99% of the population.
99% of the population clean shit on their arms/hands with fucking water you filthy cunt.

>>39624910
Are baby wipes actually anti-bacterial though?

>>39624889
I'm the savage? Ok Abdul.
>>39624901
I'm disgusting? Ok Hamza
>>39624913
I'm the filthy cunt? Ok Mohammed

Lot of pakis in the thread today.

>>39624428
What A-levels did you do lad?

>>39624892
Thanks lad. At least it is treatable I suppose, if that's what it is I'll just have to deal with it.

Do you get prescription exemption like when you're diabetic? Just wondering in case I end up having to have tablets for the rest of my life.

>>39624961
>not cleaning your arse properly makes you a paki
they would applaud you m8

>>39624961
>t. amerishart who lectures europeans about muslims and being clean

>>39624970
I did maths, chemistry and biology. Also did physics at AS but dropped it.

>>39624971
I've never heard of that, didn't even know it was a thing. I've paid for every prescription so far.

>>39624977
They would applaud you, pakis are well known for not using toilet paper. Looks like you've allowed sharia into your bathroom.
>>39625004
I'm not American but I am sickened with the amount of pakis/paki sympathisers here, living a paki lifestyle even with their own bathroom habits.

how much would you pay a dog walker per hour?
thinking of charging 8quid, reasoning; min. wage (rounded up) means 1hr human time = 1hr doggo time. plus there's like one other business in my area, which charges 10quid.

>>39625048
you live in a posh area?

>>39625048
Undercut the other businesses, then take many many dogs for a walk at a time.

>>39625048
I hate people who pay others to walk their dogs. Fucking cunts can't be bothered to do the work that comes with owning a pet, they probably have nannies for their kids too.

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>>39625075
>he didn't have a nanny growing up
>he didn't let the nanny help him make big cummies

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>>39624308
>>39624324
>>39624393
comfy rain times

>>39625006
Yeah just checked and it is not covered. Although they are trying to get it covered. Something like 2/3 of docs in the UK think the medical exemption should be broadened to anyone with a lifelong illness. Hopefully will mate. I reckon it is a great idea.

>>39625075
>I hate people who have more money than me

Boo hoo. I have a cleaner too and I get healthy meals delivered every day by Deliveroo. Cry harder faggot.

>>39625032
You know you can use toilet paper AND a bidet, right? It's not just one or the other. And wanting a clean arse doesn't make me a paki.
>wow wtf this bidet makes me want to fuck a 9 year old xD

Extended family coming round for some party thing in an hour or so. Pretty shit tbqh as it's gonna take up most of my saturday. The free drinks are nice but it's not really worth it.

>>39625099
This does not happen.

>>39625108
My god you're a pompous faggot.

Anyone ever worked at Argos? I'm thinking of applying for a christmas temp position.

>>39625119
>You're a pompous faggot

I'm sorry you're jealous mate, maybe you should have tried harder in school, brainlet.

>>39625119
I wish it did though.

>tfw you will never lose your virginity to a qt nanny

>>39625133
>I get my arse wiped by a 50 year old indian woman because I'm too dumb to clean or cook for myself
Yeah so jealous

>>39625150
My cleaner is white

>Too dumb to clean or cook for myself

Yeah because it requires a lot of brain cells to clean, right? Maybe cleaning and cooking is a big intellectual task for a brainlet like you though, heh.

But by all means, keep scrubbing your floor like a nigger slave, while I enjoy my comfy life and gourmet meals.

>>39625173
>my cleaner is a saggy old Polish woman
So jealous
>gourmet meals
So jealous of your greasy takeaways

>>39625125
I did about 12 years ago, so I may not be the best source of information on how it is now.

Did xmas temp, spent all shift in the back bringing shit out to people who did not notice, or chose to ignore, the several dozen other waiting people and insisted that they get their shit first. Manager and most of the staff were ok, just the customers are a bunch of cunts and the work was horrible.
I'm guessing that nowadays it will be mostly old people since a majority if younger people will shop online rather than at argos.

off to buy some pate lads

Why is everyone is angry?

>>39625207
She's around 30. And what the fuck do I care how good looking she is? It's about keeping my house clean

>greasy takeaways

Oh my god, are you so broke that you've never heard of Deliveroo? Or do you just live in a shithole poverty area where they don't operate?

>>39625064
yep. was thinking 2 at a time to start, gradually increasing with confidence.
>>39625075
i know, but at least im helping the doggos out, and they're willing to pay to have their dogs have a better quality of life

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Argos removes catalogues from stores to 'test demand'


>Sheena Hendry said it was "astonishing" that there were no catalogues to pick up from an Argos in the Highland capital.
>In a message to the business on Facebook, she said she was disappointed that there appeared to be plans to phase them out.
>She said: "Do you even realise how many hours of peace and quiet that catalogue gives to parents of young children who sit flicking through the toy section?"

The self entitlement here is astonishing.
>that book was a free way for me to not have to deal with my own children
Should have thought about that before you spawned some rugrats.

>>39625271
Lmao she is Polish then

Oh and I'm so jealous of your turd delivery service

>>39625301
Doesn't matter where she's from. I don't even know. Somewhere in eastern europe though. The point is that she cleans my house and I don't have to, while you scrub away at your floors like a bitch. Or live in filth, probably.

>Turd delivery service

You mean the delivery service that sends me high quality healthy meals from top rated local restaurants every day? Where I can choose whatever I want from loads of different delicious cuisines, while you have to make do with whatever horrible Asda slop you can afford?

Yeah mate...I'm sure you aren't jealous. I honestly feel very sorry for poverty stricken saddos like you. The type of life you are forced to live is horrifying to think about.

>average biscuits per pack: 29
>I got 32
brutal

>>39625351
>he's still replying
So jealous of your pee pee poo poo delivery service

>>39625292
It's alright, nowadays you can just put a kid in front of a tablet to shut it up

>>39625372
What happens if you only get 26 in your next pack? Law of averages is a cruel mistress.

>>39625372
it goes on weight not the amount. I work in a sweet factory and we're meant to send out boxes of 35 sweets that weigh say 350g. I regularly take boxes off line and wedge in as many sweets as I can then send them off down the line.most places have weighing scales that automatically kick off the under/over weight product but can just put them online after the scales

My gym charged me for an extra month of membership because I have to give one months notice before quitting, but I cancelled the direct debit. Now I keep getting automated texts and emails asking me to contact them and pay up.

Can I just ignore this and expect it to eventually go away?

>>39625460
this is the last pack I'll ever buy

>>39625420
Hmm, yeah I wonder what pee pee poo poo I'll get delivered today.

Might have seafood linguini from Carluccio's. Or Moqueca de Peixe from Las Iguanas (poverty stricken losers probably don't even know what that is). Or, since it's saturday, I might treat myself with some ribs from the Chicago Rib Shack.

What are you having for dinner tonight, anon?

>>39625468
You are a legend mate, that's such a nice thing to do for people.

I mean not for your employers, obviously. But for people who get the lucky boxes.

>>39625487
So jealous of your wee wee caca doo doo delivery service

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How beautiful a day, albeit a soggy one.

Nig nog in my uni flat reeee

>>39624705
>Do you have intense, sharp stomach pain? Rectal bleeding? Weight loss?
Sharp Stomach pain right now, rectal bleeding every now and again for a few years now. No weight loss.

Says 15-40 online is the age

>>39625527
It's obvious that you're seething with jealousy from the fact you've reverted to posting in such a childish way. With that excuse for an intellect, no wonder you're poor.

Now, enjoy your poverty slop tonight Anon. I'll be thinking of you and laughing as I enjoy my wonderful meal.

>>39625538

might want to bring a safe for any valuables

make sure to drill it to the floor

>>39625528
You ever gambled on a fart, anon?

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>need to go exchange some travel money for my holiday
>look in my suitcase, find 100 euros I didn't use from my last holiday
result

>>39625545
So jealous of your poo poo dinner in pee pee sauce

>>39625551
This. Make sure you keep all valubules secured. And remember: Around blacks, NEVER relax

>>39625577
Fucks sake that is a massive result. Even better now with the shit exchange rate. You must be pretty minted to forget about 100 euro. I'd have been changing that back as soon as I got home.

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Dreamt I was suckling on a teat. Felt amazing for some reason tbqh lads.

>>39625656
Do you live with any women? I imagine one came into your room and got you to suck her tit while you were asleep.

>making pizza dough
>spill oil over
>pool of oil on the counter, don't want to waste it
>rub dough in the oil because it needed some anyway
>picked up a bunch of gritty stuff from the counter with the oil

probably going to be a shit pizza this week

>>39625525
I used to work in the easter egg bit and sometimes the machinery would fuck up and stop for a bit and we'd end up with solid chocolate eggs, I sent out a good amount of them to some lucky buggers,

>>39625613
Yeah the exchange rate was about 1.14 back in March, now it's like 1.09 or something still don't regret brexit. Welllll I wouldn't exactly say I'm rich, I could just never be bothered to go change it back.

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White bois just can't stop getting BTFO

>>39625686
>not making your own counter for a fraction of the cost

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>Suffer from anxiety related ED
>Anon mentions sucking a tit
>Remember kissing the tits of my ex gf
>Get a huge boner
I've made a huge mistake

>>39625686
>preparing food on an unclean station in the first place
Chef Ramsey's rolling in his hypothetical grave

>>39625738
That's fair, he clearly wasn't prepared for the fight as he showed up in a football kit and was probably wasted

>>39623258

>Paying your TV license
>Not even once

>>39625786
>not making your own tv programming for a fraction of the cost

>>39625781
yeah he really should have bought some gloves, i believe thats an instant DQ

>>39625762
>has erectile dysfunction
>is worried that he has an erection
Shouldn't you be glad you have one?

>>39625780
wasn't where I was making it lad, it was to the side where I hadn't cleaned and prepped it beforehand

>>39625538
Ok dude my serious advice is be very careful about your internet usage. I had several years of my life wasted after my flatmates saw my internet history and I was forced to drop out.

Hide your fucking power level.

>>39625803
I feel like I should feel glad, and just because I don't I start to worry and then lose it

>>39625836
how the fuck do your flat mates find out about your internet history

>>39625836
What was so bad on your history that you had to drop out?

>>39625838
Shit that kinda sucks

Do you have a sex life or are you a virgin? Because I imagine if you're just masturbating then you shouldn't feel that anxiety

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>went to a carboot
>saw a white roastie with two black kids
>not a single black man in sight
when will coal burners learn

>>39625939
the father was probably out stealing stuff

Happy Cirno day, lads!

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>>39625933
I've had sex once in my life, it was really nervous but I did get it up but I didn't finish, after the deed was done the girl I was seeing revealed she was a massive slut (in her defense, he dad was a nonce which would fuck anyone up), we break up a few days later, I was already feeling really guilt about having sex and that was the nail in the coffin, ever since then its been patchy getting it up, and when I do I just think about the sex and then I feel bad

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Test post, just want to see if this wojak works the way I want it to

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>colaburner at work has 6 kids
>mfw I find out they're all from different fathers

>>39625939
Was the woman blonde? My aunt has two nigger kids and their dad left her after beating her. We haven't spoken to her in years.

>>39625978
Ever thought about seeing a sex therapist or something?
>>39626002
You tried

>>39626054
That could be any coalburner, seems they're all or mostly blonde fsr

>>39626066
I see a regular therapist, but I don't talk about sex with her, I've never thought about seeing someone about sexual stuff, maybe if theres someone in my life for me to care about it, but it might have sorted itself out by then

>>39625836
did you post this on brit/pol once?

today has been shit lads, just feel right fucked off at the world

feel like the only way to make myself feel better would be to sock some cunt in the face

>>39626151
You can hit me lad. Be nice to feel something besides empty for once.

>>39626151
You can spank me if you want anon

>>39625836
Are you the guy whose flatmates made comments like, "look at that big black cloud", refering the cuck porn you watched?

>>39626151

What happened lad?

origigi

> In June 1946, Wanrong starved to death in her jail cell, lying in a pool of her own vomit, urine and excrement, which the local people all found to be very funny.
chinese are kinda fucked, lads

>>39626109
I imagine a good number of women aren't actually so judgemental about things like sexual anxiety, don't worry anon I'm sure you'll find a decent girl

abdominal pain, not pleasant
and I've got work in an hour, fuck it all

>>39625836
Come on lad post story

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>Deep neural networks are more accurate than humans at detecting sexual orientation from facial images.

https://osf.io/zn79k/

>>39626234
That'd be nice, but honestly I've just been working on making myself happier for myself, giving up on any idea of having a gf for a while really helped me relax

>>39625836

Post it lad. Leave no details out.

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just seen a rainbow at the end of my road. can see the colours in front of the trees. then it started raining again and moved closer. was probably 60ft from my house. never seen that before.

>THIS IS NOW A PAKI THREAD
ONLY PAKIS AND THEIR PRE-TEEN WHITE SLAG GFS ARE ALLOWED TO POST! a11

>>39623128
There's a girl i know, she's lovely and kind, somewhat broken, i've been in love with her four 4 years, nowdays, she only talks to me when yet another guy fucks her over, never go for goths, it's only pain.

>>39626322
Don't worry. All the girls I go for were goths/emos/scene girls in high school but are now ultranormie twentysomethings. Things always go wrong though

>>39626285
Good, whatever works for you then. I'm doing the same in my life, although I'm a virgin so I have the (subjective) advantage of not knowing what sex is like in the first place. You can't miss something you never had, after all

>>39623860
>autistic
>normie
pick one

>>39626362
Exactly lad, tbqh the effort I went to to get laid and the pay off in the end, really not worth it, I wish I was still a virgin to be honest, I do feel like losing my virginity was a huge mistake

>>39626313
Only Pakis who have a white bull with a BNP (Big Nordic Penis) to satisfy their wives can post in this thread

https://xhamster.com/users/shortdickpakiboy

Liverpool. Anyone?

>>39626204
one of those days where everything goes wrong

Its pretty weird when your boss is your dad, my co-workers don't like me because they think I get special treatment but I can't quite figure out why since I get the same pay.

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>eat a okay amount
>get a stomach ache
>still want to binge eat

This must be what pregnancy feels like

>>39626384
He has traits of both. A hybrid of sorts.

>>39626285
I've been doing that since the new year. It's been nice focusing on myself; working out reading more, trying to be better. But I've also spent more time on /s/ looking at YLYL threads, looking at random girls' instagrams and looking through pof profiles debating whether to sign up. Not sure what my end game is here.

>>39626389
Yeah that's pretty much one of the main reasons I never had sex (that and I'm fucking repulsive). Can't blame you I guess, when you're younger I suppose you don't have that sort of foresight

>>39626466
>pregnancy
Is your boipucci ovulating yet Tilde?

>>39626484
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yENmufztolo

>>39625870
>>39625907
>>39626139
>>39626188
>>39626301
A load of alt-right stuff. Fucking embarrassing I know.

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Exercise bike anon, are you here? Please let me know that you're safe, I'm worried about you.

>>39626484
Not sure, how do I check?

Haven't eaten or drunk anything in nearly 36 hours lads. And I don't really want to either. I just want to rot away.

>>39626581
If you feel a tingling sensation in your prostate and your butt feels empty, it's breeding season for you boi.

>still only 6 pm on Saturday

i want the weekend to be over

>>39626523
Actually I think I remember you from elsewhere. Didn't know you had to drop out over it though. What the fuck, that's so Orwellian.

Uni students are such cunts I swear. Someone I know told me about how one of their friends was jumped and hospitalised for being "transphobic". Shit makes me so mad, and then they wonder why more and more people are swinging to the right

I got a burger meal from Chunky Chicken today and now my heart and hurts

Pakis there had no customer service skills

Got the Platinum Trophy on Persona 5, might buy Dragonball Xenoverse though I know I shouldn't
Alternatively I am quite enjoying Marvel Heroes Omega, I'll try out the other free shit too

Also
Add me on PSN!
Zabimaru-bankai

Tilde is literally the only one to ever add me despite people saying they would several times

>>39626524
how's the fight againt trip fags going

>>39626648
> Someone I know told me about how one of their friends was jumped and hospitalised for being "transphobic".

Story time?

>>39626703
I play Xbone and don't play weeb games, I'd add you otherwise. Kind of losing interest in gaming anyway.

the cold has started lads

feeling a bit chilly desu