ITT: Times you were autistic in public

>>39560959
i have diagnosed asperger's, so im inherently autistic in public, i cant not be autistic :"^)

>walking out of store
>man and woman approaching as I'm opening the door
>step out of the way and attempt to hold it for them
>I somehow miss grabbing the door so the guy has to get it himself
>grab it and hold it for the lady
>smile and say "well at least I tried"

>>39560959
also, why does pepe cry out of his mouth?

>>39561037
too much cry juice

>>39561028
See but thats pretty funny, if that were me i would turned 360 degrees and walked away silently

>>39561013
Wow that's a pretty autistic post Anon

>have internet chat with internet friend
>qte small girl has to come to my city
>"I can met with anon there"
>the deal is done, after some days I'm waiting for her outside the train station of my city
>see her in the distance, she had blue dyed hairs so I was able to spot her from the distance
>she's talking with someone
>autism status: startled.
>panic mode.
>hide behind trash bins as I look at them walking for a little bit.
>they part ways
>realize what I was doing
>spying on two girls from behind the trashcan because I was too spastic to meet a new one.
>go and meet her tryung to hide the shadow of my self shame.

More.
>driving my mopet
>distractely pass a stop without looking
>car breaks, I break, car honks.
>I stay there for a second, instead of driving away forward I push myself back behind the stop line.
>realizations: why didn't you just drive away you mongrel
>shame as I feel all the eyes of the crossing on me.

More!
>American tourists wave at taxies to stop them
>doesn't work like that here, you need to call one like uber.
>go there, wanting to help them.
>"it doesn't work like that here, miss. You need to call them."
>they nod and give me their phone "but we don't know the numbah"
>I punch the number and call
>get nervous because phone call
>fuck
>spaghetti flying this tourists are relying on me to have a nice and safe trip, they even trust me enough to givvpe me their phone.
>what if I disappoint them
>cold sweat
>give phone back as it rings
>"here talk when they answer you goodbye" I say in hurry
>bail into the mass of people and disappear
>cringe every time I think about it..

>>39561506
Finnish or french?

>mfw some freinds and I ran like frozone from the incredibles for a whole PE period back in high school
Good times

>>39561632
Neither of those pal, but eurozone ye.

one time at work a girl smiled at me while i was thinking about cancer and i looked up at her and frowned.

>>39561506
sounds less like autism and more like anxiety

>>39561194
Not sure you know how angles work

>>39563297
Not sure if you're new or just dumb

>>39560959
My whole life desu

>>39564301
Youve spent your whole life out in public?

>>39561506
>>go and meet her tryung to hide the shadow of my self shame.
what happened next?

>More!
I had a (not) similar experience.
>At charity shop the day after they introduced the 5p bag tax
>it's all normies talk about in shops now
>talking about it now
>"i'll have to charge you 5p it's the law!"
>here's my chance to correct a misunderstanding and get into a conversation for once
>"actually that only applies for larger shops"
>"oh well, it's for charity so I don't mind"
>they go back to talking about bags
>I leave

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>>39563297
I love these posts

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> Walking my neice to school as a favour to my big sister who's on night shifts.
> Get to school gates, parents have assembled
> Sister told me to keep an eye on my niece until the bell rings
> Before niece walks through school gates I kneel down and go through our careful checklist

>"Bag?" - "Yep!"
> "Jacket?" - "Yep!"
> "Paper mommy signed?" - "Yep!"
> "Gonna give it to your teacher like she said?" - "Yep!"
> "Good girl, see you after school!"
> Spud gives me a little hug and says "Love you! bye!"

>Neice runs into school gates and meets up with her friend, lean against the railings and watch her like sister said
>Moms cooing at the breezy dynamic I have with the spudgirl.
>"Ohmygosh thats adorable!"
>Spaghetti starts overflowing from my pockets, sister didn't tell me people would try to talk to me
>"We never see dads here!"
>"O-oh, she's not mine, h-heh. I just took her to school today."
>They all look at me like wtf and start looking at each other.
>Bell rings
>Wave at neice, walk away
>Go home, nap, eat, masturbate, watch cartoons, play vidya, suddenly it's 3pm
>Run down to the school ready to collect neice
>Teacher is holding her hand at the gate
>Walk over, "H-hello, I'm her uncle, Fios mom is on lates so I'm watching her."
>Teacher looks down at my niece, "Is he your uncle?"
>"Yeah! Thats Uncle Anon!"
>Teacher looks back up at me. "Good! I'll tell those moms over there. maybe that'll calm them down."
>Look over, some of the moms who spoke to me in the morning are holding their kids shoulders and watching us.
>Realize they thought I was a creep.
>Too ashamed to face them
>Pick up my neice and put her on my shoulders to she cant see my sad face
>Walk home acting like nothing is wrong when I'm actually dying inside.
>Fucking bitches reported me because of spaghetti.

>>39561506
I had the exact same thing as your second story. Although it was a bit worse because I was driving with my father and we just picked up my cousin and her friend. So after 30secs of driving after having this incident they where pretty fucking scared with the fact that they were going to be there for another 4h. I was glad they fell asleep after 15mins.

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>member of an association in my school
>want to be cool and attract the new girls who joined
>bring my guitar there
>they look at me as if i am an alien
I have played the guitar for 7 years, but since that day i knew it was time to drop.

>going out in public
Get out, normalfags.

>tfw i'm autistic so i'm always autistic in public, whether i like it or not

>>39564905
that's sweet, anon, you did nothing wrong

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>>39560959
>Go to art walk with a group of people
>Guys asks me if I found any pictures I like
>point to the floor and say "I like this"
>He just laughs and says ok
>trys making small talk with me, asks me for my favortie band and say "Elliot Smith, Uhh Needle in the Hay, Erum uh."
>other guy asks me "is this picture more your style?" say "Uh yeah, sure."

>>39564905
How are you autistic. They were the autistic ones.

>>39564532
>what happened next?

If you want to know any saucy things, no. She had a boyfriend and even if she's kind of the adorkable qtie I was just there in the most friendly matter. So nothing, really. We went for a coffee and talked for a while, even if it was awkward as fuck. It was the real first time I was around, alone with a girl.
Funny thing is that we actually met the person I've avoided before after a little while. And I didn't sperged there.

>>39564905
You sound like a sweet uncle. Too sweet for /r9k/. Begone.

>>39564905
fucking soccer moms, scum of the earth

>>39563297
[DETECTED]
org

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>>39560959
>go with sister to a store
>we split to browse for different things
>find her shortly afterwards and walk up to her
>grab her by the arm and whisper something funny in her ear
>realize this isn't my sister at all
>s-sorry I... I t-thought...
>her face when

>was taking a walk down my street
>stopped to look at the beautiful yellow moon
>I stopped near a stop sign
>a guy pulled up and thought I was gonna cross
>took me 30 seconds to notice
>pissed off he sped off
>I ran because it sounded like he was making a U Turn
>i fell lol

>Be me
>Going to McDonald's to get something to eat
>Arrive
>Look in the front window of the restaurant
>While walking in see little girl in window
>Smile at her
>Go in
>its packed
>So many normalfags inside
>dont do well in crowds and hate normals
>Standng in line with normals
>Checking my phone
>Trying to not let autism or anxiety get in the way
>Look back at the little girl
>i think her mom sees me
>Try not to look completely obvious
>My turn to order
>Order food
>Wait
>Check phone
>Cop walks in
>Cop is talking with one of the employees catching up they are friends i think
>Still waiting for food
>look back at little girl
>Notice the cop
>Start getting nervous
>Cop starts talking to the mom of the little girl and is blocking my view of her on purpose
>I think he noticed me and who i was looking at
>Still scared
>Get my food
>Walk out
>Look in the window one last time
>Smile and wave at the little girl
>Run the hell home

>>39561867
>having friends irl

Get the fuck our of here you normie

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>>39564905
fuck these self absorbed thots who think the whole world is out to diddle their kids

>my dad comes to visit my town so we can celebrate his birthday
>i'm excited, we don't see each other too often these days so i want to make his day special
>i tell him to meet me in front of the town library so i can pick him up
>i find him at the meetup spot but his face looks zoned out and dejected
>i ask him what's wrong
>he tells me he was simply taking pictures of the scenery when the police suddenly approached him
>apparently some egotistic bitch thought he was snapping pics of her kids inside the library and reported him
>he tried to explain to the officers that he didn't even point the camera in that direction but they weren't taking him seriously, it was like the pigs had already branded him a creepy criminal
>he eventually had to show them his phone to clear up the misunderstanding
>the cops then left without apologizing or even admitting they were in the wrong
>my dad had 'broken' written all over his face
>i tried my best to cheer him up but the damage was already done

FUCK i wanted to track down the bitch who destroyed my father like that and wring her neck. also fuck those prejudiced cops.

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>>39564905
>want a cute niece
>chad older brother still hasn't settled down with a woman yet

>>39566056
Kill yourself you pathetic faggot. You're proof there is no God cause there's no way anyone with the power wouldn't have a thousand eels rape your eyesockets

>>39561506
The last one's not even that bad, they can order their own taxi

>>39566093
Reminder that women commit sexual abuse at a slightly higher rate than men. The fact that men are profiled to be inherently more kiddy fiddly really isn't fair and is genuinely harmful for both kids and adults. Yet talking about anything like this gets you shouted down because it isn't gynocentric in nature and feminism rules all discussion with an iron fist.

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>>39565946
Oh god this made me cringe, how fucking autistic do you have to be to actually wave at the little girl? and even a cop was there? you are so fucking retarded it's not even funny.

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>finally have the courage to get a haircut
>go to the local hairsalon (its the only one in my town)
>only women and gay guys work overthere so I'm already tense
>its my turn so I sit down and some qt starts cutting my hair
>have awkward small talk but nothing too autistic
>suddenly somebody storms into the shop completely in tears crying
>turns out a coworker of the hairsalon killed himself
>all the girls and fags working there start crying and comforting eachother
>all the other customers decide to leave out of respect for their loss
>mfw Im still sitting silently in the corner with half of my hair cutoff...

>>39564905
it sure would show them if you kidnapped their kids

>>39566394
kek that's tragic and awkward as fuck

>>39560959
You guys should read what Kaczynski wrote about oversocialization
You all seem like you're crippled by it.

>>39566521
Is the fucking unabomber really the best person to be talking about sound mental states?

>>39562935
"Autism" in this site means doing anything remotely awkward, newbie.

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when I have to walk past women in public places I start to walk manually. Worst time was when two women were sitting at the bench and start laughing (maybe not to me, but I felt awful)

Maybe I need help

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>>39566394
Oh fuck I remember hearing this one before

>>39560959
>Be me, 15 years old
>Find out about the deep web through YouTube videos
>Imagine myself as an intelligent mastermind behind some crime syndicate.
>Go to school the next day
>Start telling people how I have access to any drugs and child pornography
>People give me the "okaaay?" responses
>One of my "friends" talk to me about it, laughing
>"What do you want to do with some child porno, you some kind of pedo?"
>I start to get embarrassed and he made this Nickname for me, "The Ass burgers pedophile"
>He said things like "WHAT DO YOU WANT ASSBURGER PEDOPHILE" loudly so people could hear it.
>Many other kids caught on and began calling me that as well because it was funny to them
>Drop out of the school after the year ends.

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>>39560959
>be 6 or 7
>swimming in community pool
>wearing my trusty goggles and snorkel
>face starts to feel uncomfortable from snorkel stretching goggle strap, take it off
>dive underwater and see dad (from the chest down) think it would be funny if I poked him in the ribs with my snorkel
>extend hand with snorkel and propel myself forward at full speed
>stab snorkel into his ribs with the added momentum of my weight
>surface to see his expression
>it isn't dad
>mfw I speared a 60 year old man with a snorkel in the ribs at full speed

>>39561013
Fucking off out of our board normie

>>39560959
>People are being jerks
>Go away
>Anon why are you so antisocial
>Antisocial behavior is a sign of autism
>Eat some chocolate
>Chocolate is something autistic people like
>Wow anon you're so autistic

I don't get people anymore

>english class, first day of school
>teacher is trying to get to know us
>tell her im an ESL
>a guy at the back says hes also eligible for double time
>turn around, ask him if hes ESL too even tho he didnt seem to have an accent (i kinda dont)
>he says no
>realize i fucked up between his answer and the explanation, so a span of 2 miliseconds
> he straight up says "im autistic"
>i turn my face and body away while everyone is staring at me and trying not to laugh
>im about to explode with the biggest kek of my life
>manage to keep it silent (still audible tho) yet blush like a tomato
>everyone knows im laughig like a maniac
>they start laughing too
>think to myself "i think i am too"
It took the class about 2 minutes to get into normal mode

>tried to shake hands with cashier before ordering at mcdicks

>>39567255
get out of the country you fucking foreigner

>>39561071
Sides left
Original kek

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>>39567282
>tfw french living in quebec

>>39566335
>female teacher fucks a male student
>"you go bro, you da man!"
>"every horny boys dream is to bang their teacher"
>teacher gets a light jail sentence

I don't even have to greentext the predictable outcome of the reversed role

Why do I even bother posting in these kind of threads. It's not like people care enough about it to give it me a (you). I'll go back to lurking.

>>39564975
>they look at me as if i am an alien
explain?

>>39566671
R9k is modeled after Rodger's manifesto so why not?

>>39566697
Y-yeah.. N-no one here has diagnosed autism...

>>39567930
Maybe learn to get to the point cunt

>>39567930
then why did you post this stupid pile of garbage?
If you're not going to post, don't post, you don't need to post some whiney woe-is-me bullshit about how nobody pays attention to you on a fucking ANONYMOUS IMAGE BOARD.
If no one pays attention to your post, it's probably not good enough to warrant attention, but not quite shitty enough to warrant someone calling you a fucking idiot like this one.

>>39565079
I know, that's what was so crushing about it. I'm not a creep, how could someone judge me like that from a 5 second interaction and then have the nerve to act on it?

>>39565236
Hey I'm still KHV. and I spend less than 5 hours outside per week. I've also been here for 6 years... I think I belong here.

>>39565384
Agreed.

>>39566093
Thats fucked. Stupid whores. Sorry your dad had to go through that anon.

>>39566196
Honestly it's pretty great. I'm glad my sister is a normie because having nieces/nephews is the best. My sister lives down the street from me and has a key to my apartment because she's a worrier and she feels she has to check on me and make sure I've eaten/slept/showered/not KMS so 4 out of 5 days a week I usually get woken up by my favourite potato monster. even if they're just stopping by on the way out somewhere it's the best part of my day.

>>39567255
>eligible for double time
what?

>>39567039
>8th grade
>discover bestgore
>tell friends about it
>branded creepy psychopath serial killer who masturbates to gore

>>39563297
he moonwalked.

>>39566813
I can relate to the laughing part

>>39566394
Oh hey someone reposted my story, but with the wording changed to be a lot shorter and a lot worse :^)

>>39566196
>tfw uncle to four (4) nieces.

Shit's cash yo. They usually fight because they all want me to give them a piggy-back ride and try to impress me by drawing the best picture they can. Idk what I did to deserve them

>>39571238
post your version