Devilish Things You've Done Recently

>>39329305
Nothing I smoke pot and nothing pisses me off

I lied like once ir twice this week to avoid awkward conversations, not much.

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Good job anon, you just helped protect your future job security at the same time

>>39329305
>walking down the neighborhood at evening
>its no hood but not nice either
>with my ccw (walther ppk)
>theres a guy in the park with a doberman
>the dog sees me and it starts to run towards me
>starts barking
>tries to bit me for my foot i step back get my pistol and fire 4 rounds at the dog
>BLOW HIS FACE OFF and front right foot/paw whatever
>owner is like WTF DUDE YOU JUST KILLED MY DOG
>i aim the pistol at the dude and yell
>IT WAS SELF DEFENCE
>never heard about it again

>>39329613
This is originally a work of falsehood and fiction.

>>39329644
FUCK YOU
yo walther white
yeah science bitch

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>>39329644
>be me 3 years ago
>hs dropout, fulltime neet
>playing wow on my shitty premade dell computer
>mom comes into my room bringing me dinner
>shes fidgeting a bit, somehwat nervous
>out of nowhere shes saying that she doesnt like how im living like this
>gives me advice on how i should try to get back to school or find a job so i can meet people my age and make some friends
>maybe even get a gf
>get fucking angry at her
>scream at her at the top of my lungs that the reason i cant do any of that is because of my social anxiety, depression and ugly looks
>tell her its her fault for making me like this, that her genes caused me to be like this
>mom is stuttering at this point and is desperately trying to comfort me
>i cant take it anymore, tell her to fuck off multiple times and that i hate her and dont care if she fucking got raped or died
>she left my room when i said that
>later that night i went downstairs because i got hungry
>stop at the middle of the stairs
>hear my mom sobbing in the living room
>mfw shes been crying this whole time
>went back to my room actually feeling bad for the first time
>1 year later parents divorce
>feel even more bad about it because all mom was doing is defend me while my dad wants to kick me out
>basically its my fault that my mom has nobody anymore in her life except me
>as im writing this im living with my mom still a neet
>i just want her to die peacefully in her sleep soon so i can take my own life and stop feeling guilty

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Bumping this thread in the hopes that future discussion of the main posts title and body can occur withing the time limited confines of this reply chain

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This one is more gross than devilish, but here goes.

>high school me, beginning to get sexual urges and masturbate
>at first usually cum into a tissue when I finish
>decide to spice it up and wear my underwear while fapping one day
>handsfree cum into underwear, it catches my jizz and feels great
>can't wash the underwear because my large family would see
>hide it in the box of an old games console in my closet
>felt gross after and vow to never to do it again
>not too long after get horny again
>end up doing the same thing again and cumming handsfree into underwear
>hide them like last time, still with cum inside
>begin regularly rotating between various pairs of cum encrusted underwear to masturbate to autistic R34 hentai in
>eventually the box is full of enough cum-derwear that my closet stinks
>other people begin noticing the smell when they enter my closet
>fugg.jpg
>decide to eventually get rid of the box as it's become too much of a liability now
>when nobody's home one day i wrap it in a black trash bag and throw it in the outside trash
>i even threw the console in it away since it was so disgusting
>occasionally afterwards wanted to cum in my underwear like old times, but remember the consequences so never did it again

To this very day, even though it's been multiple years my closet still smells lightly of stale cum.

>>39329956
Hug your mom and tell her that despite her mistakes you love her for taking care of you despite you not living up to her expectations or something like that?
>>39329967
Get a P.O. box, order an onahole/fleshlight and then just use that hands free?

>>39330032
This, you have to apologise

>>39329956
Anon, tell your mother sorry and try to get a job. If you want to help her try to imrpove your life for her.

>>39329956
Apologize to your mom and get a part time job.

>Not pouring orange juice or vinegar into your neighbors gas tanks in the early morning hours

step up senpai

>>39331209
stop being a nigger

oregop

>>39329613
fake and gay
and your a faggot

>>39329956
Seriously. Hug her and tell her you love her and your sorry. Watch a movie with her or some shit idk. Atleast get a job in fastfood or smthn.