Hey cutie, here's your coffee hehe... do you do anything

>>39253325
>Sorry, I don't date girls with brown eyes

>No sorry, I don't befriend roasties.

No, sorry, I'm Jewish.

>>39253346
>>39253350
I bet you never even french-kissed a cute girl once in your life

>>39253325
How odd you actually look like my grandmother when she was young

>>39253325
>asking a complete stranger if they want to 'catch up'
That doesn't even make sense.

>>39253346
>>39253350
>>39253388
>>39253393
lTT, virgins

tTHANKS y-you too

>>39253325
How do you actually say yes to theses situations?

>>39253400
You're on /r9k/

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>>39253325
>file name
What the fek

Why do people keep making these posts about women asking robots out when that isn't a real thing at all,

>>39253427
>he doesn't know
kys stat

>>39253325
>Implying i'd buy coffee at a coffee shop
>Implying an Islamic coffee shop would allow women to work
>Allowing a women to have that much exposed clothing.
Huh really makes you think

>>39253325
Goodbye friend. How are you going to do it?

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>>39253325
>pwoceed to yell out "WEEEWHOOOO STRANGER DANGER WEEEWHOOO"
>runn back to mommies car
>tfw almost abused again

>>39253497
Rope. Hanging.

>>39253503
You know you want it, you little slut. Quit playing hard to get and come back to my van for some candy.

>>39253507
OK
Press F to pay respects

>>39253527
Thank you man it could not seem but it's meaningfull for me

>>39253539
No problem. Hope some of us at /r9k/ gave you some way to spend your life with a little less suffering.

>>39253325
WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT FILENAME ARE YOU A TERRORIST?!

SOMEONE CALL THE COPS

>>39253400
>virgins
>on /r9gay/

Well colour me surprised.

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>>39253325
The paranoid part of my brain will describe her as a bait girl working for an organ harvesting mafia or some shit, that has just spotted an easy target.
I'll grab my coffee, looking at her somewhat anxiously because I can't control my emotions, and dash out of the store, while the girls with a puzzled expression on her face tries to understand what the hell is wrong with that nervous lanky sleep deprived guy.

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>>39253567
says "im gonna kill myself in 12 hours from now. it was my pleasure to share all these years with u guys even though it was all fucking around or w/e. goodbye god be with you" or smthn like that

>>39253604
>The paranoid part of my brain will describe her as a bait girl working for an organ harvesting mafia or some shit, that has just spotted an easy target.
Sorry if l ask but are you LlTERALLY me?

>>39253418
you say yes, and ask her when she's off work, then ask if you can get her number

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>>39253325
>turns back
>mommy isn't here to protect me against stranger
>starts crying
>"pls m-m-m-mizz no bully no bully"

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>>39253608
Pls no
Don't do it my guy

>>39253325
no, i really hate gummy smiles, cya

>>39253604
>>39253648
holy fuck, i am exactly the same, very, very rarely like one in few hundred girls would show some interest in me and i ALWAYS feel like something sinister is going to happen

>>39254006
>>39253648
>>39253604
Serious question. How to stop being like this?
>just relax and loosen up mate!
what if I relax and the girl is really just a bait for her abusive romanian boyfriend to beat me and kill me time time?

>>39253325
Stream it pussy

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>>39254250
Don't. Be like this. Robots and cyborgs like us were not born to slay pussy. Therefore random hookups should be of no interest to us, and that girl in the OP is clearly looking for one.
Only trust people you know well. This strategy still works.

>>39254430
>Only trust people you know well.
I have 0 friends outside work.
I barely talk to anyone at work, just to assign and receive tasks, never do anything social with them.
Don't have any family.
I live on my own and have 0 interactions with the people that live in my building.
Who should I trust? I really need a kiss.

>>39254464
She wants to steal your wizard powers, just dont give you your boipussi day 1

>>39254608
I don't have wizard powers, I has sex with a girl when I was 21.

>>39254464
By "people you know well" I don't mean close friends. You colleague, for example, has little reason to randomly mug you and put a bullet in your head in a dark neighborhood, unless he's a full blown psycho. Same with your neighbors.
Even if it's just a girl you found on tinder, you can simply go to some public well lit place. And then if she asks you to walk her home, and for some fucking reason the path runs through the back of a parking lot next to a shady bar, you'll know there's something fishy here.

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>>39253325
>do you do anything later?

>>39254655
>meet 6/10 gentle girl on Tinder
>invite me at her place
>her place is in a very respectable zone
>enter place
>her abusive boyfriend is there with his friends, laughing at me, slapping the shit out of her shile she's sobbing "sorry" to me, his friends enter a room with her while he proceeds to beat the shit out of me, almost killing me.

>>39254675
> invites you at her place the day she met you IRL, knowing you're not looking for a quick fuck
Totally not suspicious at all.

>Sorry, I don't do that sort of thing
Sincerely what I'm prepared to say should this ever happen

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>>39254731
>you don't ... do... dates?!

>>39254750
Then I say no. It has the double benefit of getting me out of the situation and leaving the girl slightly confused, which would be funny in a sitcom way.

>>39254769
*tips fedora
How's crying yourself to sleep every night, fatty?

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>>39254675
Also, now I want to white knight and hug that girl, and she doesn't even exist. Why did you give these feels, anon? You could've just said she was a total bitch making money on her acting skills this way.

>>39254786
Nah it ain't like that. I just figure it's the best way to avoid explaining why I don't want to be in a relationship or date. And this way I wouldn't have to "reject" the girl.

>>39253325

Uh, I ordered the iced coffee but that's okay...I'll take the hot coffee instead. No, it's fine really! It's actually chilly in here so it'll cool off quickly if I take off the lid. Hehe...

>>39254825
oh you don't even know the good part. Her sister used to rent her out to her friends when she was younger. The things they did to her...