ITT: most humiliating accidents >bully chad is picking on

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>>38891433
>mallets screwdriver up bullies ass

kek

>fumbling around for my ID
>condom slips out of my wallet
>everyone around looks and becomes completely silent
>qt girl who was eyefucking me since I got there smirks

Best part is; this happened TODAY. No more than 2 hours ago.

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>>38891433
>saw a kid shit himself them pretend to have a seizure in the middle of a school assembly when we were standing
>rolling around in his own shit
>gets up and runs out of the hall

>>38891433
>waiting for a bus
>a pick up truck scratches a sedan on the street
>driver of pick up truck is a planetary hambeast woman
>starts raging on sedan driver
>squeals like the fucking hambeast she is
>cops show up to deal with the situation
>sheranaredlight.jpg
>cops ask her to go to the station with them to sort it out
>she refuses and squeals even more like the pig she is
>suddenly decides to try and climb on the sedan to avoid arrest
>can't even fucking climb due to planetary size
>slips and falls on the ground
>accidentally shits on the street
>paramedics come later and has to carry her to the back of her ambulance
>obvious shit stains on the street

>>38891433
>kid thinks he is a frerunnner
>large fellow who calls himself MZ BadBro
>wallruns
>faceplants
>fracture eyesocket
>eyeball hanging down cheek

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>middle school
>band class
>two levels of risers for brass section
>class dismissed
>try to jump over tuba rack from top riser
>bottom pants hole gets snagged
>flung over
>dangling down with pants caught
>fucking ripped all the way up to hip
>peers see my tighty whities
>all laugh
>run out holding up shredded khakis
>go to bathroom and vomit in stall
>have to wear gym shorts rest of day
and this was the precise moment I never took risks again

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>>38891433
>"squeal for me piggymen"

my sides

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>8th grade
>autist who sat with the chads for some reason at lunch
>they'd always make fun of me and tell me to fuckoff from the table
>near the last day of school I actually cried
>"lol dude it's just a prank bro"
>wasn't sure if it was genuine malice or actually just a prank

>>38891654
I see what you did

and I saw it ORIGINALLY

>>38891433
>hear sobbing in bathrooms in HS
>find kid covered in vomit, shit and toilet water#
>turns out he seizured while taking a shit, feel off the toilet, brought the shit with him
>vomited
>rolled around in it

>>38891433
give me moar stories

>first day of high school
>class heading to cafeteria for some kind of orientation.
>dude decides he's going to slide down handrail.
>manages to travel about 18 inches before he flips over backwards and lands on the stairs below.
>a good 10-12 foot fall, lands directly on his head.
>"oh shit! dood must be dead!!1!"
>miraculously pops up grinning like an idiot and rubbing his head.
>is known as Rockhead for the next four years.

>One day decide to go to the movies
>I go to the local cinema and buy a ticket to see the new star wars movie
>Buy myself a bucket of pop corn and cola
>Get assigned a seat in front of this couple
>Suddenly the start whispering behind me
>What seemed like a pop corn bucket hit me behind my neck
>Suddenly a voice starts screaming ''This loser came alone at the movies''
>Everyone in the hall starts laughing and they start throwing popcorn at me
>Lights turn on and the movie stops, 2 security guards come to my seat and escort me out.
>All the screaming and the flying objects in my directon give me a panic attack and i shit myself
>Get kicked out of the cinema and my mother came in with new pants to pick me up, after that she drove me home and beaten me for going to the movies without a gf

>be 12
>friend goes to washroom
>i forget and end up going to the same washroom
>door is unlocked
>walk in on friend who is totally naked on the shitter with his clothes all neatly tucked in on the floor
>yells at me
>wtf dis i just witness

Now i always knock on the door before i enter