"So anon, why would you like to work here? What was it about

>>38865443
the money, definitely the money

I want to work at your company so when you are not ready and looking the other way I can rip your top open and drink your guts.

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>>38865443
because i need money and a job to live and maybe pop bottles on the weekends too.

literally every dude that was like :ooo ur company blah blah" is lying they all just want a job too and its a bullshit kiss ass question

>>38865449
>>38865463
"Oh... I see..."
"I'm sorry anon, we're looking for team players here who follow the company's ideology and truly believe in it!"

>>38865443
Because i'm likely much more qualified than any other of the candidates, there's literally no reason to not hire me.

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>>38865443
I wanted to fuck the boss's daughter

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>>38865443
"Remember what I told you, Slugger."

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>When they want your job history.
>When they ask you for 3 references
>When they ask for emergency contact.
>When they ask you for your hobbies.
>When they ask you about gaps in your employment and why you didn't finish college.

And it's not even a $10 an hour job!
but, they hire the managers nephew who just got out of prison for theft and arson but, overlooked it because he's family.

Or when they give the job to some immigrant who needs to pray 5 times a day and isn't fluent in english or knows what numbers are.

FUCK THIS GAY EARTH!!!!

>>38865540
"Well then you must be good at working as a team! It's time for the team building exercise with the other candidates! Don't worry, its a fun little scenario we've made up!"

>>38865597
lovely, i can endure teamwork.

>>38865609
"Excellent! You'll be teamed up with Chad, Brad, and Stacy! Their parents have been working for us for years!"

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"Anon... I noticed that there's a year gap of unemployment in your resume. Can you tell me what you did during that year?"

>>38865443
What you don't understand is that the employer KNOWS it is a bullshit question and that you will most likely just make up a story about how you are passionate about the company just to get a job. And that is EXACTLY what they want you to do.

Once you say such a thing out loud it gets easier for you to accept your "passion" about the company as truth in the future. It is a form of brainwashing.

Remember how we all used to post in women hate thread ironically when we were newfags? After a few years of such bullshit we started to believe in it. Now we hate women with our full passion.

Same thing happens in companies.
>"why do u wanna werk for us?"
>I LUV ur company mr shecklelstein, I wanna put my lifework into it
>[oh god im so good at bullshitting him]
>"ur hired mr wagie :^) enjoy ur werk"
>dank u sir for givin me a chanse :DDD

>*months pass by*
>"hello mr wagie how are you today? R u putting ur soul in dis combany? :^} "
>yes sur I luv dis combany wid my heard :DDD lel
>[damn I luvmy job lol but only ironically. Leli will never leave dis blace :DD]

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>>38865597
S-see I voted Bernie see.
So i'm all about that good stuff.

>>38865443
I would not like to work anywhere, however living does not come freely.

>>38865617
i imagine this scenario is surely business related, is it not?

>>38865449

I actually did this in my first ever interview for a retail job

>>38865573
>>38865573
Say you're gay, then they hire you for inclusiveness.

Source: I'm actually gay and got hired because of it.

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"So why do you want a career in scanning various documents and shredding paper, why this job, anon?"

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>>38865620
played vidya and watched anime

>>38865573
Both of those people looked the manager in the eyes and gave a firm handshake anon.

>>38865620
Father had cancer and almost died
Then you hand them a paper from a psychologist that yourr fit to work again ez

>>38865443
It really is insane how fucked up the job market is, I just never saw it that way but it's truly a good way to enslave people, the fact that you need certain unimportant requirements such as good appearance for a job at a call center is truly amazing

A lot of people want freedom but I've never heard of someone talking about freedom in the job market, it's all "do this, be like this and maybe we'll hire you"

>>38865463
That's kind of the point of this post. How to deal with having to act and pretend.
It's really an awkward and painful situation when you think about it : no one believes in this lie, not even the normiest of the norms, yet we are supposed to show submission by playing this tune. I'm pretty sure even employers are sick of it.

>>38866149
This just came to you. Like now, today. Fucking light just goes off. Boom. Dude take to chemistry because you're hot on the way to solving some of the world's most important problems.

>>38866203
They are but they need to see that you can play the game too. Part of it is some right of passage bullshit. I did therefore so must you.

>>38865443
I wanna be a fucking cop.

I joined the fucking millitary because I have no aspirations and qualifications

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I love the industry and this type of work, I just felt this was my calling.

*quits job 1 month later w/ no notice*

I really just wanted a new pc.

>>38865443
"Okay, let's be serious, you guys know what kind of shitty question this is. I don't "like" to work here, I "like" to work here because you guys are one of the few companies who invited me and I need the money, the exact same reason why you work for the company."

"I feel like the job by its description aligns well with my skillset"

Usually something like that is my go-to and is generic enough for anywhere. I think some companies are starting to wisen up though and getting rid of the bullshit feel-y questions.

>>38865570
"Uhhh I heard you guys excell in hand shaking etiquite and extended eye contact"

>>38866299
>When you give all the bullshit about how much of a benefit you'll be for the company and how you're so qualified and what makes you stand out from the rest and the impact you'll have on the company and your future aspirations in the company

>Leave 2 months later for a better job.

>>38865443
look mate i know you're asking this question to learn how much dick we're willing to suck to get paid so let's cut out the metaphorical middle man and be honnest with eachother the only reason i was attracted to this company is because you we're hiring people in my field and i need money i'm willing to work hard because slacking off is boring without friends that i wont get and i'm going to say whatever the fuck you want me to say because i don't give the slightest of fucks about whoever i'm saying it to