What keeps you from suicide? How often do you think about it?

>>38563339
The hope that i will suddenly catch a break and finally get a call back saying i got the job.
And the fact my dad would be devastated and hes really the only person i care about.

Seriously though if i cant be independent by the time he dies ill just hang myself and wait for the smell to pester the neighbours enough to find my suicide note and rotting corpse.

>>38563339
Mom, dad, new niece, wife, half brother, friends. Wouldn't want any of them to feel like shit or as though they're the reason I did it, which is inevitable I think with suicide.

Probably think about it once every three months.

>>38563426
What if he becomes a handicap you need to care about?

My love, but she fucked me over and used me, so nothing really is

>>38563484
Then why are you alive?

>>38563452
Then we both die.
I wouldnt be able to afford taking care of him let alone myself anon.

>>38563339
Family needs me right now and would be hurt if I offed myself.

If I had no one I would basically kill myself or be a vigilante till I got shot.

Kinda sucks because heaven is gonna kick ass.

>>38563595
That sounds like a vicious circle. There always will be people, that care about you, and because of them you are chained to this life.
Do you really want to suffer because of others?

>>38563339
I am currently contemplating hanging myself in my closet. There is a wooden beam that goes the length of the closet. I was thinking about looping a belt around my neck and then tying off the other end of the belt around this wooden beam. At that point I would relax my knees with the assumption that I would quickly fall unconscious and die while in this state. My main concerns are the beam breaking or some complications arising where I don't die, just fuck myself up.

If I don't decide to go through with that, I am just going to kill time by edging until it is daytime and the bridge that I plan jumping off of opens up to pedestrian access. Maybe I'll hesitate there too, but I have to at least give it a shot. There is nothing left for me. I'm sick of chasing hope.

>>38563339
I don't think about it as much as I should, maybe like once every couple days, but I'm not suicidal.
Love is what's keeping me going, the hope that I'll get it someday despite being what I am.

I guess what stops me is myself.
I mean, my ideals, my mind, my thoughts.
My family.. you know, usual things.

I like to live, but I do not like the life I'm living.

I think about it a lot.

>>38563690
>relax my knees with the assumption that I would quickly fall unconscious and die while in this state.
I don't recommend you to do that, anon, you can survive and get a severe brain damage. Find a better place, like a tall tree in the forest, for example.

>>38563799
That's what I figured. I'll just wait until the bridge opens up.

>>38563647
Got to do what I got to do dude. But no, soon as my family is gone I am.

I have grown to not be able to care for others. I think how awesome heaven will be every day and want death.

Basically I can thelp it but I cant form bonds with anyone now, not women, friends, etc. Each one just makes me want to die worse because frankly all people suck so I just want to be left alone.

Family and politics

>>38563836
>politics
rly...

>>38563847
This is the only teints that I love... But I know I am a trash

im too curious to call it quits plus grill

>>38563339
Michael from Vsauce and his random uploads always make me want to live another day to see if there's a new Vsauce video.

Knowing that someone will find my body.

>>38563916
His videos are cool, but that's not really the excuse for not killing yourself, you know.

>>38563339
>What keeps you from suicide?
It's not Monday yet.

I don't own a gun and I'm scared of using any other method.

>>38563938
you can easily make yourself bodyless, just get a small polyethylene or polyurethane swimming pool for kids, fill it with 50% hydrogen fluoride, make a contraption that cuts your rope after 15m and makes you fall in it.

>>38563999
Don't you think, that even if you had a gun, you would scare to use it?

>>38563987
i have some excentric level of autism and like the way he talks okay

>>38564002
meant PET not pur

a mix of my parents and
>>38563938
>>38563999

i am racked with incredible guilt every time i think about how they'd likely be the ones to come across my body, or how they'd have to clean out my room and figure out what to do with my possessions

>>38563938
Why? Do you afraid some necrophiliac would rape you or smth?

At least one time a day, ironically, sometimes not.
Basically losing time keeps me going last time i checked was 12 'clock, time goes so fast, i'm going to keep posting until exhaustion then i'll sleep.

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>>38563339
pic quite related my friends

>>38564018
A little, but I'm sure I could figure it out.

>>38563339
Cowardice, i used to think about it everyday but maybe a bit less often now

>>38563339

>What keeps you from suicide?

Essentially my life is a joke. I live in my Mom's basement. She pays local bills and I have debit card that's in my Dad's name which I use to buy fast food (1-2 times a day), regular groceries (aka just soda), and gasoline. I donate plasma for alcohol/cannabis money.

>How often do you think about it?

Literally all the time. every time I save/watch a clip from my dash cam, I have a recording of myself chanting "I need to kill myself" alongside the sound of me smacking my nails on my center console. Its the first thing I think when I wake up in the morning, and would be the last thing I think at night but I'm usually past the point of thinking by then.


Just waiting until my parents decide to stop supporting their failure, or some other life circumstance comes into play. I've had a SD9VE tucked under my computer desk for the past year, ready for the occasion

>>38563521
I wonder why too, i could say its me not having anything to kill myself with, or maybe because i hope against hope that the signs she gives means ill be with her again, but its most likely that im a fucking pussy

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>>38563999
Literally me
>tfw it's almost impossible to get guns in my country legally

>>38564586
You can try to imitate weapon in your hand and attack cop.

>>38564757

most cops dont carry guns in countries where its not legal to own them

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>>38563339
In Yurop, you can't get guns.
If by some magic i could. I would wait for my parents to die then i would blow up my brain i guess.

>>38564832
You can buy smoothbore rifle in hunting shop.

>>38564868
You can't in my country.

>>38564896
Are you sure? What country are you from? Do you have hunting shops?
You can probably need a license.

>>38563339
my... self-preservation?
no idea, honestly.

>>38563999

just hang yourself, it can be painless

Suicide is fucking stupid.

You are not entitled to anything in life. Killing yourself over being miserable is an equivalent of throwing a fit because mom didn't make you chicken tendies.

>>38563339
I've been pretty lucky in life (smart, not poor, not fat, 5'11, pretty according to some) and I want to see how it goes.
I might be lonely but I'm hoping that with some therapy and effort, it can all fall into place.