Food service stories

>>38137682
What color was she? If she was white, what color would you assume her children to be?

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>>38137682
>work at McDonald's
>first week on the job
>sitting at table by myself eating my free food before my shift starts
>suddenly see burger wrapper slide across the floor in front of me
>hear man yell "GOD FUCKING DAMN IT, THEY NEED TO TIE THESE THINGS WITH A DAMN ROPE OR SOMETHING"
>try really hard not to laugh
>notice angry old man sitting by himself in the corner holding a burger
>"w-would you like me to get that for you, sir?"
>glares at me
>"I don't give a fuck what you do."
>co-worker picks up the wrapper and looks at me
>asks "Do you really wanna work here?", clearly dead inside

I stopped showing up to work shortly after that because my manager was a bitch and they only let me work 1 day a week anyway.

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>be me
>some waitress is whining about a person who didn't leave a tip but left a note saying she did a good job
>I idly comment that she should be happy someone thought she was a perfect servant
>she tells me she's a server, not a servant
>I ask her what the difference is
>she tells me a servant does whatever they are told
>I see, I answer in a serious tone
>Can you bring me some ketchup?

>>38138228
You sure showed her Anon, gud job

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>>38137682
>work at restaunrant
>doing some dumb dice discount which customer has to roll dice
>its a mix coulple an old black lady and white bald dude
>start explaining to them
>'UHUH NAH SORRY I DONT PLAY THESE WHITE PEOPLE GAMES'
>cant hold laughter in and start laughing like crazy in front of them
>they get 25% off bill because of it
manager was slightly mad but he understood my view at least.

>>38138878
were they playing dungeon dice monsters

>>38138912
you basically roll the dice and whatever number you get is the percentage off your next bill. so 3 is 30% off and so on.

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>first day working at sub joint
>job seems okay at first
>making someone's philly cheesesteak
>lift sandwich off cooker and accidentally drop it on floor
>manager screams at me in front of customers
>quit three days later
oh well, got a much better paying job a month later anyways

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>>38138878
another one
>the outside area is closed after 6pm because of no license
>its still pretty nice out
>jamaican couple come in
>'can we sit outside brotha?'
>sorry outside is closed after 6
>'WAT TIS IS MADNESS WE ARE EATING ELSEWHERE'
>start softly chuckling and eventually full on laughter
people are so funny it almost makes the shitty profession worth it.

>>38138925
oh the restaurant rolls the dice? i thought it was the customers.

>>38138942
>>38139001
>>38137837
I don't know how you guys find these places

My current job at a pizza place is a 100x easier than the shit I had to do at Amazon. Now THAT was some soul draining shit.
Never appreciated a 6 hour shift as much as I did when I was pulling 12 there.

>caring so much about your corporate overlords that pay you $8/hr and not just letting her go take a piss

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>>38139421
$11 an hour

And people have used our bathroom to smoke crack in before and I don't want to deal with that

>>38137682
WOKA WOKA WOKA FLOOOOOOOOOKA

Real talk, 99.9% of wagies realize they're not paid enough to care or ask questions, so they jus let people use the fucking bathroom and leave because it's not worth the hassle for minimum wage.

>>38137682
i'm a jimmy john's employee myself, when the fuck did you ever have to buy something to use the bathroom?

>>38140196
See>>38140062

it's a shady area

>>38137682
I fucking love Jimmy John's radio commercials. Good laughs.

I also work at Jimmy John's

>>38140237
>$11 an hour

which fucking jimmy john's do you work at? i've been there since december and i'm still 7.25.

>>38137682
>>38140196
>>38140265
/jj/ general when?

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>>38140303
I live in Washington. Minimum wage is about to be even higher - 15 an hour

>>38138228
I'd originally dab to this.

>>38140328
you're making me want to kill myself even sooner

>>38140328

>Wagies complain that minimum wage is too low to live on
>Minimum wage goes up
>Everything gets more expensive to compensate
>Wagies complain that minimum wage is too low to live on
>Repeat until economic collapse

>>38137682
>be bartender
>hi. can i get a sex on the beach, but with bailey's instead of vodka, and kiwi juice instead of orange juice?
>hey bro do u have phillips screwdrivers.. also can i charge my iphone here and leave my kid with u?
>hey bro can i have that drink that everyone has that you put, like, that stuff in there and then mix it in with that other stuff?
>i've always wanted to be a bartender. i prepare my own cocktails @ home. here watch this. imma make a kooba libray. so we put some ice in the shaker, then some coca cola and then we shake.. ayo what the fuck *explodes in his face*
>yo bro i'm really good at juggling, man. *takes most expensive scotch bottles and breaks them* sorry bro
>hey man i want 4 beers i'll be OVER THERE. *points at nowhere then disappears into the distance*
>hey i know there's like 100 people waiting in line but i'm special so i'll take up 30 minutes of your time trying to get shit for free by ordering extra stuff that isn't on the menu
>hey thank you for waiting for me to finish my drink and working overtime, bro. here's a generous tip. said no customer ever.
>i totally understand you, bro. we work 12 hour shifts too. it's so hard watching the waves all day and no one drowning. it's hard to be a lifeguard.

>>38140452
>hey bro i've just got my certificate from the international bartender's association *proceeds to grab glass by the rim*
>*tries to open bottle cap with teeth* *breaks tooth in half*
>hey bro i tipped that waitress. how come she won't give me her number? wtf.. i want my money back. i want to talk to the manager.
>hey bro do u sell condoms?

>Tfw no job
Feels original man...

>>38140405
Not the case the increase in sales cover the cost of a higher min wage. As the min wage worker now have money to buy food and stuff. States with higher min wages have a better economy

>>38140452
>hey bro i wanna drink shots
>hey bro wanna hear a joke
>*passes out in the toilet*
>*tries to have sex in the sea after getting shitfaced and nearly drowns*
>what do you mean you don't put himalayan salt on the rim?
>hey bro what's the best cocktail
>hey bro imma guess what you have on the menu and never look in the actual menu
>hey bro i brought my own glass. it's smaller than yours so you'll have to charge me less
>*steals tip jar with hundreds of coins in it*

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>>38137682
>work at bar/restaurant as bartender
>there is outside bar area which is just for drinks which waiters take orders (mostly people waiting for tables to free up)
>actual bar area has 20+ people asking for drinks who just came to drink
>this snob mid 40s guy comes through a couple people
>'excuse me can you do your job and take our drinks order? we been sat there for over 10 mins'
>just laugh and say someone will be with him shortly
I fucking hate people.

>>38140627
fucking retards don't know how bar works

just sit your ass down, clown, it's not my fault that the waitresses ignore your fat ass

i can't possibly know which of the 100s of people is not being pampered right now, i'm busy putting 100 ingredients in 33 shakers

but then again the cuckstomer is always right

>>38140452
>>38140478
>>38140575
I enjoyed reading these, thank you. Didnt realize bartenders got THIS MUCH shit

>>38140673
my favorite is when cooks and waitresses ask for free drinks and when my boss is a stingy jew at the same time :)

Anyone else have to clean out a salad bar?

Fuckin hell, I'm never eating out of a salad bar again.

>>38140690
>really busy hour
>the kitchen chad comes over when you have 10+ tickets do to
>'bro can you make me a drink is hot af here'

>>38140724
>cooks literally do nothing all day except sit around the table and talk
>we're out in the literal heat servicing hundreds of people
>AYO TENDA MAKE US SOME JRINX MANE
>when you ask for food they can't even be bothered to walk over and give it to you

>>38140706
kek i worked at a place which cleaned the plates and utensils for 3 food courts in a mall

knowing how many spoons and forks fell down onto the floor near the dirty as fuck siphon and rolled in grease.. i will never eat at a food court again

even if everything went through a thousand degree heat cleaning, i still won't touch nothing from there

fuck that shit

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>be me, server at O'charlies
>fat dyke couple come in
>both morbidly obese with dumb haircuts
>ask what they want to drink, both have Dr. Pepper
>"I'll be right back with those drinks and some bread."
>dyke 1 cuts me off, "I want ranch with my bread"
lolwut.jpg
>brings out beetus juice, 10 rolls (supposted to be 1 per person +1 for the table), extra butter butter, and a side of ranch
>5 mins later, dyke table needs more ranch and bread
>bring it to them and they are ready to order
>both order steak and tenders combo with a side of french fries and house salad
>ranch on both salads of course
>bring food and refill beetus juice
>"Sir could we get some ranch for the tenders?"
the tenders come with honey mustard, how much ranch can these beached wales eat?
>before closing out check ask if they would like any desert
>they are not interested
>under my breath say "if it came with ranch you would be."
>they heard me
>demand to see manager
>calls him over and they demand free meal
>manager gives it to them
>they don't leave me a tip
>later manager asks me if I had really said that
>deny it, state that they were running me like crazy and were mad because I informed them that free pies were only on Wednesday and today was Thursday.
>manager believes me

>mfw no tip but the fat shaming was worth it
>mfw i never saw those butter heifers again

>be meat department at whole foods market
>have to give people burgers and ground beef all day and wrap it up with only paper and a sticker printer
>customers have retarded demands such as asking me to wrap 10 individual packs of ground beef which takes 5 minutes and holds up the line
>people bitch at how long its taking when im helping customers like this and imply that my service is bad
>we only close with three people so literally its sometimes me alone trying to serve ten annoying middle aged mothers or entitled rich assholes who want $50 steaks
>sometimes people want marinated shit like a rack of ribs with barbecue sauce all over them so it gets all on my hands and coat and i cant wrap anything cause it gets wet and the stickers fall off the paper
>ground beef flies everywhere in my pockets and hair
>everything is unsanitary as fuck. you're supposed to not touch different types of meat together but nobody gives a fuck
>by the end of the day there are bits of meat and ground beef all in my shoes and the floor is disgusting
>once i dropped a burger on this disgusting floor and asked what to do. they literally just put it back on the tray like nothing happened
>smells like a sewer because we have to open drains up and clean rotting old meat out of them

>>38140770
lol, you bartender fags are delusional if you think you have it harder than a cook. In a restaurant with a bar, the cook definitely works harder than the bartender

>>38140950
at an actual restaurant, yes

but not at a bar with a kitchen

>>38140950
>In a restaurant with a bar, the cook definitely works harder than the bartender
like the ones where the bartender is both a bartender and a server?

>work at taco johns
>find 10 year old box of meat in freezer
>

>>38140950
>expected to make drinks/serve drinks/clean tables/occasionally take orders/welcome guest at door if no one is there/clean 300+ glasses
>I just cook and label my section lol
nah

>>38140947

I'm the CEO of Amazon. Which one do you work for? I'd like to talk to you.

*breathes in deeply* ahem.........................
NIGGERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>>38141078
I'm not racist and I didn't want to believe the "black people are terrible tippers stereotype." 3 weeks into serving job, I fully accept and state the fact that black people are the worst tippers.

>>38141046
That deal hasn't gone through yet, Jeff. Don't go jumping the gun.

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>>38140950
>>38141039
>do my job and put drinks on the pass
>waiter is too busy doing something and we are under staffed
>take the drinks to table myself even though I have 5+ more tickets to do
>get to table and handle drinks
>'excuse me can we order more X'
>have to go to till now to put order in
>come back to bar and now 10+ orders to do
>waiter comes and asks for drinks i literally just handed customers
>oh thanks bro
>another waiter comes and asks where are his drinks customers are waiting
>manager walk past and asks me to clean table x of glasses
>kitchen staff asking for drinks
>running out glasses because i have no time to clean them

>When you go into a fast food place and they say "The usual?"

>>38140303
Cuck, just started at jimmy johns two days ago and I'm at $8.00

>>38140237
>>38140303
>>38141584
A bunch of fucking retards don't know the minimum wage is different state by state, or even city by city in some situations.

>>38141973
i know that don't be rude

>>38137682
Do employees actually approach people that use the bathroom without paying? I don't understand how someone could be so stupid to ask the staff if they could use the bathroom? Just go to the fucking bathroom when you walk in and leave

>>38142014
Fool, they have the coin-slot lock, or key-lock
IDIOT

>>38138878
>>38139001
Fucking keked, anon.

Origi

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>>38140405
If everything gets too expensive why not just get the government to do price fixing so everyone can afford things again?

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>22
>worked 30-35 hours at same sandwich shop for 6 years
>Not in college
>$9.25/hr
>One of the best workers there, get paid 2nd highest to manager (who is a good friend built over the years)
>Come into work 4 mins late everyday hungover
>No responsibility despite being able to handle everything at job
>Get to leave early or go on smoke breaks whenever it's slow because basically I said so
>Spent 30 mins in the bathroom today shitting because I drank a fourloko the night before and had diarrhea and I work faster than everyone else
>Get free food (worth about $70 per month total)
>Going nowhere in life
>Make more than my co-workers but not in school so that's not saying much

I have like $3000 saved up should I just go to school or something? I'm stuck in the same old cycle

>>38142081
Is this real? Where do you live where you're that cucked?

>>38142167
The cuckiest of them all
Cuckifornia

>>38140405
>the "I don't understand basic econ" starter pack

> waiting tables
> reaching down to serve someone's plate and a huge top-heavy blender drink topples onto some lady's head
> it was not even her drink
> wanted to crawl under the carpet
> spaghetti filled the restaurant

>>38142133
You know you could join the army and live a very similar life and learn a trade and get college money. Just don't go combat arms. All you learn in infantry is everything you need to survive when your unemployable ass ends up homeless.

> a guy in a restaurant gets sick and vomits at the table
> it is a booth so fabric seats
> we have to clean it up
> they end up using the table again and seating someone there not long after
> customer asks to switch tables because that one is wet
> entire waitstaff sides in orbit

>working inside reading terminal market
>nigger lady unhappy with my tone of voice
>explain to her this is how i normally sound
>im finna get my nephews to 1 2 3 u lil bitch ass honkey!!

needless to say i never got "1 2 3'd" but we good senpai

>>38142250
He's right though
Inflation happens if you start demanding too much from corporations

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>>38142302

> 1 2 3 u ass

KEK

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>>38137682
I was johnny odd jobs in high school and college. Take a fucking seat
mcdicks
>woman ordered fries just throw them at cashier
>fryboy high as shit tried dipping his hand in fryer on cold morning
>itis would pour ice cream into hand to snack on
>jerome put his penor between mcdouble and called it a mcdick
>threw it away

KFC/A&W
>bratty ayyoooo kid gets canned and flips the fucking root beer barrel off counter
>kid let the ice on drink fountain run for a solid 2 minutes
>ice and water everywhere
>tyrone tried selling weed through drivethru
>homeless manager showering inn bathroom after closing

Waffle House
>cooking eggers
>manager fires staff on the spot
>was 3 minutes on the job
>turns out place failed inspection

Dominos because fuck pizza hut
>high school drama amongst staff
>fist fight once
>stepped on necks boxing pizzas
>manager wanted to do ride alongs with drivers for "evaluation"
>woman run over in parking lot

Subway
>working line
>roastie putting in bread trays
>fubars and drops it
>loaves everywhere
>says i cant deal with this and leaves

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these threads are why I don't eat out

>>38142327
Adjusted for real wages the US has the lowest minimum wage in the oecd. Prices are based on what consumers are willing to pay. Just because they raise the price of a burger to keep it consistent with wage growth doesn't mean anyone has to accept the new price. In fact if that were the case economic development could literally not happen because real wages wouldn't ever rise.

>>38142445
If you raise minimum wage, employers have less money to pay their employees. If they have less money to pay their employees, the unemployment rate will increase by a significant amount. What is so hard to understand about this you brainlet?

>>38142087
this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this
oregibaleo comntet

>>38142445
>Prices are based on what consumers are willing to pay.
It's also based on what the company needs to charge in order to turn a profit, if you fuck with too much and they can't break even they either need to raise the price of goods or file for bankruptcy.

I agree with you about adjusting wages for inflation though

>>38142499
Fucking dipshit jesus christ. It cuts into profit first and foremost. You think the minimum wage is just magic set by god? It's kept at 7.25 arbitrarily. Once again the US has the LOWEST minimum wage in the oecd. Some firms may even go bust if wages are increased but new ones will fill the gap that's how the market works. They still won't be able to charge whatever they like for a burger because people don't have to accept paying the same fraction of their wage for burgers. Insulin for a diabetic sure. They have to accept a price hike but not everything. Once again real wages could NOT ever increase if your bullshit idea were true. Go be a fucktard somewhere else.

>>38142594
Sure I agree. Some firms would have to change their business models or could go bust but ultimately it's the consumer who decides. (Unless we're talking about insulin for diabetics and so on) if businesses could just scale up prices as wages rose for any product they wanted then real wages could never rise.

>>38139421
you don't even know friend. not food service but i work at a gas station in the ghetto with a big heroin and meth problem. i've had 5 people OD in the bathroom when i was on the clock. there's a reason for rules like those, i wish my boss would let me lock it up.

>>38142695
Yeah I agree, obviously there is a point were consumers will just stop buying from that company if the price gets to high, it's at that point though that the the firm goes under and collapses in on it's self, which would all be avoided if the minimum wage was kept realistic.

Not sure what position you're arguing for at this point

>>38142499
>If everyone would just perform slave labor unemployment would drop to 0%

>>38142841
Obviously you cannot set the min wage at 1000000 per hour and have everyone be rich but wages CAN be set at a level where corporate profits are kept within reason with higher wages that keep the standard of living high for a developed country

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>>38142379
(Cont)
Non chain restaurant
>cool place that has every type of cuisine
>morning meeting
>manager wants (((original))) dish suggestions
>chad suggests cookie and dick
>told to get out
>waitresses banging dudes for tips
>cooks were d&d fags who played while cooking
>always had dice out
>tfw bus boy who had shit time

Jack in the box
>anyone there past 10pm was high as fuck
>demoted from window to line
>woman chatting up a storm with roastie at window
>"im pretty sure the bastard who works fryers spit in my tacos"
>not even me
>didnt spit in her tacos but made them 90% lettuce

BK lounge
>nothing interesting
>dane cook is a liar

Not food but guitar center
>old man jenkins bringing store to years with acoustic
>buys it
>man comes in a week later
>same guitar as old man
>says his father died and he wanted him to return to bless the next person who buys it
>sad and uncomfortable staring at it on wall every day

Concessions at movie theater
>countless people say you too when I tell them enjoy the movie

These are the best threads. Comfy.

Keep it going anons

>>38142914
His basically. Bigger corporations make way to much profit anyway. Mr noseberg squeezes that extra profit out of the helpless waggie.

Raising minimum wage a bit wont change much

>>38137682

>order two cheeseburgers from McDonalds
>eating one of the cheeseburgers later at home
>notice a crunch
>check in cheeseburger
>notice there are onion slices and not the little square onions that taste amazing

YOU PUT THE WRONG ONIONS IN THE CHEESEBURGER, IT DOESN'T TASTE GOOD. THE LITTLE SQUARE ONIONS TASTE SO GOOD.

>>38140989
Well, pretty much this.

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>>38143997
I feel bad for you anon. Nothing worse than getting home and then finding an issue.

It's like that time they didn't give me a straw. This McDonald's for some reason have brought the straws back behind the counter. I got it to go so just assumed they would have included my straw.

HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DRINK MY SODA PROPERLY? IM NOT DRINKING WITHOUT A STRAW AND IM NIT POURING IT OUT INTO A GLASS FUCK SAKE MC KEK GET IT RIGHT

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>be deli worker at Ballmart
>slice meat for customers, cook rotisserie chickens, etc
>be 8:30 pm
>we stop cooking chickens at 8 cause nobody buys hot food after that
>if nobody buys them by 10:00 they get tossed
>1 chicken is $8.47, 2 for $15
>be 9:30
>wrapping deli meat for closing
>old dude and his wife approach
>"hey, are there any more chickens?"
>uhoh.jpg
>"sorry, just the one"
>"can you make more, we want the 2 for $15"
>isthisniggaserious.png
>"no, sorry, we start cleaning the ovens at 8"
>old dude scoffs, shuffles away with wife
>mfw

>>38141046
Fuck you, where is that fan I ordered asshole?

These threads are to good to archive

>>38145029
>Fuck you, where is that fan I ordered asshole?
In my but :^)

I'm so glad I went to uni. I work so much less harder in a 'professional' job than I did when I was in hospitality. In fact I'd say I was more productive too hahaha I'm putting in like a 1/3 of the effort and making twice as much and I've only just started my new job. Working hard is a fucking meme in retail/hospo you cant get anywhere in it

>>38145657
What about if you suck cock?

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I've only ever worked delivery jobs because they're infinitely more comfy

Deliveroo
>deliver food from restaurants on my motorbike
>restaurants had a tablet and when the food was 5 minutes from completion they'd press a button on it to call the closest rider
>most places don't call me until the food is actually 5 minutes from ready
>not this place
>thaikhun
>every time they called me I had to wait twenty fucking minutes
>after waiting twenty minutes chatting shit with the other riders waiting there it arrives
>some fucking faggot ordered a milkshake
>it's in one of those plastic cups with the lid with the hole in it
>they wrapped it in cling film
>I have to carry this shit in my back box
>I'm an experienced biker so normally I can turn so sharp my fucking knees scrape the ground
>not now
>need to kill speed going round corners or roundabouts or anything
>takes much longer than it would have to get this delivery out
>finally deliver it
>after marking it delivered get a phone call from the boss
>"why did that delivery take so long?"
>mfw

Cont

>>38146105
Go ahead my friend

Working for local truck company
>delivering beer to pubs
>side note, for any bar fags reading this, the reason we take so long with the delivery is because the depot takes two hours to loads the kegs, it should be a 30 minute job, they then give us ten minutes to do each drop, while most take at least 20-30 minutes, and the delivery times they give you are based on that timescale, which is why we're always "late"
>been working there for 6 months
>new guy gets hired
>boss wants me to second man for him
>basically means I'm doing everything but he's driving
>ok whatever
>can tell straight away this guy is a fucking moron
>we get to the depot and I tell him to go into the office and deal with the paperwork while I flag down a forklift driver and get the truck loaded
>they hand us the paperwork in the order that we pass the pubs at so we take the most efficient route possible
>I didn't find out about this until later but it turns out he fucking dropped the paperwork and it all got mixed up, and he didn't think to reorder it or tell me or anything
>eventually truck gets loaded, I get in and we drive off
>on the way out he doesn't go across the weigh-bridge and didn't take any paperwork or sign in when he was at the office
>security guy didn't care and let us out anyway
>travel four hours to first drop
>all goes well
>barman even gave me a can of coke
>drive about 40 minutes to next drop
>all goes well
>next one is just round the corner
>next one is forty minutes away
>weird but ok
>notice we're going back the way we came to a town we'd already passed
>ok
>next one forty minutes away again
>I'm getting pissed at this point
>next one an hour away
>we get there
>it's right next door to the first drop
>I hit the roof

Cont

>>38146123
>I hit the roof
>after unloading all the kegs and putting them in the cellar the woman asks why we're not taking the empties
>I explain that we're not the actual distribution company, but we're contractors and don't go back to the depot at the end of the day
>she says "oh but the man told me that contractors do take them, it's just laziness and lies when they don't"
>never found out who the man was
>if they give us shit about it we usually just take them
>drive away from that cunt at the speed of sound
>get to last drop
>go in with the paperwork and the barman is red in the face
>"why are you so late"
>try to explain to him but he doesn't care
>he refuses to take delivery
>ok whatever
>go out and tell the driver
>"oh bad news we're out of driving hours"
>you can only drive for 10 hours a day and I left my card at home because I didn't think I'd need it
>"and you didn't think to tell me sooner?"
>I'm pissed as fuck
>been working for 15 hours at this point
>now I'm around 4 hours away from home
>stuck
>phone the boss and explain
>for some reason he sent a driver to come pick me up
>didn't get home until 1AM
>I started work at 4AM

Never let the boss get you to babysit the new guy

>>38146105
>>38146123
These are both me I forgot to reply to myself

>>38141198
>not just waiting for the waiter to do their fucking job

>>38146143
Why didn't you train him properly. Couldn't you have set out the route. When you start a job you don't get an chip implanted that gives you all of the knowledge of the job

>>38146143
Any more anon? I find your stories comfy

>>38146260
The depot set the route out for us and I ALWAYS follow that, so if there's a fuck up its not my responsibility and the depot get the shit, but I didn't know he mixed up the paperwork until he told me on the second last drop

I did explain to him that something isn't right here and we're sticking to what the depot said to keep ourselves in the right, he just never thought to tell me he dropped it, if he'd done that everything would have been peachy and we'd both have been back home at like 5

>>38146296
I see your point regarding that issue for sure anon.

>>38146263
I have a couple more, check back in around 15 minutes anon, I'm glad you appreciate my work stories

>>38146312
Sweet, ill check back soon

>be me
>work at Cafe
>pretty comfy desu
>one day
>Fucking bitch comes in
>have to deliver her tea
>deliver it and leave
>bitch cleans in spilt tea on her
>goes full spastic and starts spouting shit about how much she makes
>boss is keking
>eventually the bitch leaves
>boss tells me not to worry about it
Cont

>>38146432
>be me
>at home chilling
>get message from boss
>hired two new people
>Fuck
>arrive
>they're both knackers
>like fucking gypsies
>get to work and keep to myself
>one starts calling me names
>the others ok
>I ignore them both and work
>two weeks pass
>cunts are gone
>ask manager where they went
>"they didn't want to be here"
>never saw them again
>apprently they fell out with customers
Cont

>>38146462
>working outside serving
>two idiots chilling in the garden with dog
>dog is a fucking pitbull
>doesn't like me
>goes to serve them water
>dog attempts to attack me
>kick it straight in the face
>mfw
>manager comes out
>head back inside
>they're like super embarrassed
>say sorry to me and the dog is left in the car
Cont

>>38140947
lmao where? shit like this happens constantly at the sam's club i work at. i remember one idiot sweeping the ceiling while they were still cutting and wrapping.

>>38142302
your 1 2 3 is coming though

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>work at DQ
>first day on job, fucking busy as hell
>trying to figure out what goes in each Blizzard
for any eurofags DQ is a fast food chain that mainly sells ice cream, everything else is unremarkable
>trainer tells me what goes in each one
>not remembering any of it since there's 20+ different Blizzards
>didn't show me the chart next to the station that tells what goes in each one
>6 different types of chocolate sauce
>fuck up once and other workers make you feel like ending yourself
>orders keep coming in
>nobody is communicating with me
>accidentally make blizzards that are already made and served
>other employee rips it out of my hand and throws it in the trash
>complete and utter confusion
pic related is near 100% accurate of how I felt

>>38146495
Final one
>working again
>busy asf
>Ukrainian couple come in
>they look pissed off
>take their order
>give them their shit
>still look livid
>Fucking hell
>eventually they pay
>the meal costs 5 euro
>gives me ten
>think in getting a 5 tip
>cunt purposely did this
>"sorry here's the pay"
>gives me a 5 euro and laughs
>also asks for water
>cunt.jpg
>spit in the water
>give to him
General public are cunts desu

>>38146123
What country anon?

Sounds UK/ Ireland

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>>38146563
Continued
>day 2
>learn the foreign language that is cash register
>mfw seeing it the first time
>it's a fucking panasonic from 1984
>laminated printout over the buttons with 10,000+ different menus and submenus
>"so basically you press A if you want B unless they want it C then you press D then B, but make sure you press E first" etc.
>realize immediately i am going to fuck up so many orders
>register only lets you take your most recent entry off the list, any more than that and you need a manager
>this includes scrolling through menus as well
>customer wants a different sundae? manager
>customer want a banana split blizzard and not a regular banana split? manager
>customer want a 5pc chicken basket and not a 6pc? manager
>as you can expect things go downhill immediately
>trying to find where each order is hidden on the register
>some items have their own button while others are hidden in a submenu
>spend most of the time just staring at the buttons like an autist
>have to constantly ask coworker for help
>she's nice about it though, kind of like how people are nice to a 3-legged dog
>most customers can tell I'm new here, takes some of the shame away
>never want to use that damn thing again

>>38146397
Some short deliveroo stories

>on motorbike
>have to stop at traffic lights
>hear a little kid say "dad look a motorbike! It's so cool!"
>feelsgoodman.jpg

>got a haircut around lunchtime when I was doing the dinner time shift
>really wasn't so sure about it when it got cut
>have a flip up helmet so I just expose my face when going up to customers
>near the end of the shift it's really fucking hot for some reason
>standing at the door waiting for roastie to count out some change to give me a tip
>can't take it anymore
>take off helmet
>"wow I really like your hair!"
>kept it same style ever since

>doing dinner time shift again
>customers can leave little notes on the delivery order for me to see, to help me find their house or whatever
>get one asking me to pick up a bottle of coke
>been having a pretty good day so far so I oblige
>run into shop across the street while I'm waiting on the order and grab a 2 litre bottle, two pounds
>keep a hold of the receipt
>arrive at the door and like five roasties open up
>hand them the food then say "surprise!" and pull out the coke
>they actually scream
>one of them even hugs me
>close up bag and look up expecting to be reimbursed for the coke
>*slam*
>I was actually quite hurt

>doing lunchtime shift one day
>get order to this big dumb student complex
>whatever, whenever I get called to one of them I usually just stand outside and phone them
>on the deliveroo driver app there's a button in the top right corner, you press it and it calls the customer
>press it
>I hear a message explaining that customers weren't happy with us having their phone numbers (I'm guessing some people were being jackasses and calling customers after they'd delivered or whatever)
>shit
>have to run around this huge place in motorbike gear looking for room 83c
>I ask literally everyone I pass and nobody knows where it is
>after around 15 minutes of searching I find it
>phone call from boss
>"what took you so long?"
>I hate those calls so much

>>38146296
When someone is new you have to double check what they're doing or you usually get shitted on

>>38146665
Scotland, how did you guess?

>>38146774
Yeah I know that, but how was I supposed to know he'd mixed up the paperwork when I was dealing with the forklift driver? Forklift drivers are literally all massive dickheads

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>>38146681
Continued
>day 3
>back to Blizzards
>more work but easier to understand than the register is
>realize quickly there's a major recurring problem I can do nothing about
>bitch coworker
>we'll call her L
>L is basically supervising me, borderline micromanaging
>constantly breathing down my neck and judging me for every mistake
>whenever I mess up something minor, like the ice cream cups aren't in the proper shape, she takes it out of my hands, throws it away, and just says "again"
>the entire time she's staring at me like I called her mother a bitch
>we're both on blizzard duty so you'd think we'd be communicating about who's doing what
>wrong.deb
>whenever I ask her what she's working on she just stares at me like I'm a complete dumbass
>this leads to very frustrating situations where I either make the same blizzard she already made or she yells at me why I haven't made this blizzard yet
>mfw
>can't complain to manager since I'm new and I'm expected to adapt
>forced to bite the bullet and deal with it

>>38146806
That's true but i've learned to just do a check for the unexpected. Every time I think to myself "I've been through it all" someone raises the bar of stupidity

>>38144843
Working rotisserie at sam's is retarded too.
>placing chickens in tray
>"uhhhm excyoo me when are the next chickens coming out?"
>other guy wandering around
>"when are the next chickens coming out"
>put chickens out
>how about the next ones?
everyone is so fucking picky about their 5 dollar chickens

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>>38140806
> his food court doesn't have plastic utensils

>>38140405
It only repeats until corporate has had enough and replaces everyone with robots

>>38146123
So basically, you get assigned to train new guy, don't, new guy messes up because it's his first day, you get mad.

>>38146932
>only the freshest is good enough for me!
They want to feel like smart savy shoppers otherwise the depression of buying and eating that chicken will cause other dominoes of realization to fall.

Never worked fast food and dont plan to

>>38147685
they'll only accept them if they're PERFECTLY browned, doesn't matter if they came out of the oven seconds ago.

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>be me
>work at pizzeria
>nigger tries to order a pizza without meat, cheese, or vegetables
>he tells me to make sure its boneless and make two of those shits
>tell him that pizza can't be boneless
>he asks "u gon put bones in my shit then"
>reply "Maybe I will, maybe I make no pizza"
>he gets mad
>"don't tell me that u fukin wit me on dis mane. I need them shits A$AP Rocky"
>I tell him he'll get his pizza when he sucks my "A$AP Cocky"
>"Y'all food services ain't been shit lately "
>I reply "Y'all snot-nosed bitches ain't been shit"
>he says "I swear on my life, and my yeezy bruh. If I pay for this shit and it gets delivered BONE-IN, its a wrap for y'all."
>tell him "Come to the store and I'll give you a boneless ass-whooping special carryout discount"
>he mutters about he gonna get Chinese because they don't put bone in his shit and hangs up

>>38146540
thats fine with me, i hope so :)

>used to serve at Denny's
>smelly hispanic landwhale couple is seated in my section
>they asked for me because I'm brown apparently
>they barely speak English
>"why don chou speke espanol"
>"I was born here"
>"oooo ok"
>they get three orders of the two dollar pancakes and two glasses of water, bringing their bill to a whopping six dollars
>my guest check average is brought down because of this, later resulting in my manager getting upset at me
>they have me bring honey cups for their pancakes and I bring three
>they ask for more three times until I have brought them about 15
>the nasty ogre woman literally puts them in her purse when she thinks I'm not looking
>they finish eating and leave
>go to clean table
>they left me a nickel and three pennies
>the table is a mess
>they stole all of the condiments, even the ketchup
>there's a honey cup upside down on the table
>pick it up to throw it away
>it was completely full and goes everywhere
>put salt on their pancakes the next time they came in

>>38142379
>fryboy dipped his head in fryer
Holy shit wtf

>>38142379
>>38143262
Let me guess Albuquerque?

>>38148020
yo nigga nice copypasta winrar
i laughed so hard i slobered

>>38140770
>>38140950
just chill guys, both cooks and bartenders have tough jobs. we're meant to be bros, the customers and management are the enemy

>>38141126
wrong, even black people tip more than FOB Asians. and at least they can speak English, you have no idea how much garbled, mispronounced words mixed with moonrune speech and frantic hand gestures I've had to try and interpret

these are the best threads on this board :3

>>38143262
>>manager wants (((original))) dish suggestions
>>chad suggests cookie and dick
>>told to get out
>>waitresses banging dudes for tips
>>cooks were d&d fags who played while cooking
>>always had dice out

this is so hilarious

>>38146530
What? Greentext please

>>38151376
LET ME FUCKING HANG OUT WITH YOU SAMSON
we live like 0.3 miles away tops, tried to contact you on skype a while ago you never answered

I'm a typical robot nothing special

>>38137837
>manager only gave you 1 day a week
They didn't want you there clearly,if they did you'd have been given more hours so you did the right thing by leaving.

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>>38146756
>get order to this big dumb student complex
RREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>38140452
Hey fuck you I'm a lifeguard and it's hell. I've had children vomit in my face during rescues and people make me watch their kids too all while I have to keep watching the water in 100+ degree sun and save whichever little shit drowns