Hey anons I know I'm just one of the bunch but for some

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Hang in there anon, I know it's shit but we have to get through it. I mostly listen to music to help with my emotions. Today I woke up at 2, and I didn't talk to anyone for the whole day.
Here's a song for you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gmd1HVGBzk

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>>37461478

What the fuck do you do when you just randomly feel like breaking down and crying.

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It's been a while since mine has hit hard, but whenever it does, I cry myself tired and then listen to music until I fall asleep to calm down. Just don't cut yourself, did that and regret it a lot.

Shit will get better soon, anon, have a good night.

>>37461478
i think about how i have no friends and plan my inevitable suicide

>>37461478
I have this theory, it's kinda freaky if it's actually real but I think our emotions are affected by planetary and cosmic movement. also the moon. For some reason whenever I feel really bad I come on 4chan or talk to some people and see they all are feelin it. It's scary but it could be very much a possibility. Our emotions aren't controlled by us. also I think some ((((people)))) are working on technology that affects human emotions.

>>37461478
sorry anon
i usually just put on some music or sleep

Sigh. It's been getting worse every day for the past 5 or 6 years. I really don't know what to say anymore. The worst part is that impedes on my potential. I know I'm smart and passionate, but I've fallen so behind because of fear, anxiety, and fatalism. It seems that I am in the rearview mirror for some people I considered "dumb" in the past.

I don't want to waste any more time or else I won't have anything to look back on. I think I may finally start taking SSRIs.

But as to your question, I really don't. When I'm with my roommates I tend to just scream suicidal things but it's become a maymay now so I'm le funny depressed kid.

Sometimes I feel like people see me as a gimmick. You know, the "sad guy."

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>>37461478
I love to take like 150mg of DPH and turn on some music, it makes me so relaxed and makes music sound so good.

Masturbating is nice too.

>>37462351
bro i felt the same around certain company of people. you just feel outcast and most of all you feel like somethings wrong with you because your constantly surrounded by people who are different. but then I realized I am who I am and there isn't anything actually wrong with me. My mind just works differently. your not the just 'sad guy' your one of us.

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>>37461478
take your meds, anon

when mine hits in spite of said meds, I cook/bake something that takes time. Usually cookies or a half assed wellington.

and then I don't eat any of it because my apetite is gone

>>37462794
Op here, I don't have any meds because I'm too anxious to go somewhere to get them, also I relate to the cooking.

It's kinda sad that I live alone and I have to save most of the food until its bad because I got 0 apetite.

>>37461610
break down and cry, friend. it's okay, everyone has a good cry once in a while.

>>37462847
buy less food then op. if your appetite is bad then maybe keep non-perishable food or get takeout.

or you could cook for me because i never cook living alone, but i always have an appetite c:

>>37462847
Oh fuck, don't fall into that vortex. Muster every and any energy you have to call a psychiatrist. If you don't know one, google for local psychiatrists in your area.

Also, manage your groceries taking into account your lack of appetite. But it's not good to have an empty stomach. One thing I do when I can't even cook, is that I just put an apple, a banana and milk into the blender and just drink it instead of having a meal. It's healthy and actually fills you up for quite a bit.

seriously tho, don't let your depression go without treatment

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>>37461478
>so what do you do to deal with your sadness/depression?

Drugs. Benzos are easy to get if you know where to look and your depression is chronic. A few trips down tryptamine lane are what really snapped me out of it though.

I think a lot of depression and sadness is self-fulfilling, and that more often than not, we get stuck in loops of apathy -> mild happiness -> "why do I deserve happiness?" -> sadness -> apathy. Not having a creative outlet, doing the same things over and over each day, and coming to places like this where everyone else is sad doesn't help either.

Most importantly, I think it's best to have someone to talk to who understands you. You can pay therapists to do this, but if your family is comfortable on the topic, discussing your mental health with your parents is best. My Mom is the person who I talk to the most about it since she's a chronically depressed schizo, and we lean on each other during hard times.

I hope you get better Anon.

>>37461610
I know it's probably the worst option, but I usually suppress it until I can't feel anything. Then I go on to distract myself with meaningless things until I forget about it. I wish I could cry, anymore.

>>37463023
This is downright the best answer I've gotten, I think i'll try to call my family and such to make them understand and ask for support, I don't believe it will work because they are way too old fashioned, but everythiing is better than let myself "hanging" in depression. Thanks you a lot anon, this helped me a lot :).