*blocks the path which you travel*

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Hail, and we'll met, forest dweller.

>>37393823
Jokes on you; I don't leave the house.

>run past her because I know for sure she won't be able to keep up

>>37393823
*UPON which you travel
You shall speak the King's English in my presence, foul wench!

>>37393919
*eats and tidal wave of fat begins to rise close behind you*

>>37393919
>"hehe, too slow"
>shadowy arms appear from underneath her numerous fat rolls
>they grip you by your torso and lock your arms
>you are lifted a good five feet off the ground
>proceeds to tear you in two while chanting feminist obscenities

>>37393823
I wonder how much she weighs?

I wonder if there's an online game somehwere where you can guess hambeasts' weight

>>37394077
tumblr you can do that

>>37393823
I only have to walk up a flight of stairs to escape her. How is this a problem?

She looks like a friendly woman who has a lot of interesting things to say.

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*blocks >>37395348's path*

>>37393823
Slash damage for 50hp dmg, only way I'm getting out of this one

>>37393823
*head fake*
*SPIN MOVE*
*sprint away*

>>37393823
looks like most of my tinder matches 2bh, esp. if she has "in a polyamorous relationship" in her profile