Should I just kill myself im only 18 and i already think that

im nearly 20 and feel same but have no friends but thats okay.

i ahve a 12 gauge but only some 00 buck my dad gave me from the early 1990s i think

i wonder if it would kill me instantly, im scared to do it because i might live and i mean its killing yourself and thats a scary thought but if i have the choice i wouldnt wake up tomorrow

sorry you feel like that anon

>>37336490
11 year olds commit suicide, so why not?

Hey, I'm pushing 30 and while I can't tell you "it gets better" because I have NO WAY of telling whether that will be true for you or not, I can tell you this.

It changes.

Your brain is still developing at 18. You're an adult, sure, but mentally you're not fully developed.

The way I think now is so different from how I used to think when I was 18. Even "existing" feels different now than it did then. This is due to the fact that I have, essentially, a different brain than I did back then. In a sense it isn't even "me" anymore because I'm not the same person now I was then.

I guess what I'm saying is, it won't feel like it feels now forever. It'll change.

You're not going to be stuck with an 18 year old brain for your entire life.

>>37336549
I don't even have a decent way to kill myself, I'd rather not to do it desu but I don't know how to fix myself

>>37336793
me too

what makes me mad is how everything is boring an people are cool with living 80 years of boring shit and then die

but im boring too because theres nothing fun to me to do

>>37336490
Didn't read your post because of the lack of punctuation

>>37336785
I understand what you mean but everyone else saying these are the best years of your life I don't want to spend my youth an anxiety ridden insecure mess

>>37336848
I addressed the fact that it was a rambling post, punctuation seems irrelevant also if you didn't read the post why reply to it just to say you didn't.

>>37336852

>everyone else saying these are the best years of your life

Just because everyone says something doesn't make it true, man.

There's nothing so magical about your age inherently. It all depends on your mindset, and the stuff that happens to you.

People idealize the teen years but I didn't find them all that special. They were boring. I liked my early 20's more.

The main thing is just take care of yourself, learn as much as you can, don't take on too much responsibility, but you do need to challenge yourself to some extent--just don't go nuts with it.

I'm your age and I feel almost the exact same. I literally can not imagine myself even a year older, I'm convinced I'll die soon. The possibility of suicide has always been comforting too me, but I also hope that I eventually manage to become normal somehow.

Hey OP, im 18 too and i do feel the same, i dont know if this will work for you, but it does for me so im going to share it. Plan for the future, keep thinking of stuff you want to do on the future, basically postpon it because there's cool shit you want to do, wouldnt it suck to die before getting a blowjob in the shower first for example? Keep on planning on shit you want to do, if you dont know how to achieve it, youll figure it out over that, thats future OP's problem, and remember even the smallest reasons to live are okay.
Also, dont see the emptiness and meaningless of it all with sadness, if you look enough, youll find beauty and freedom in the universe's pointlesness

Ok OP listen up. That's no excuse to commit suicide. I share the belief that all is meaningless but think about that
If your actions have no impact, then there's no real consequence or reason to feel guilty for anything. You are in a good position because once you realize that nothing means anything, you can shrug off all feelings of guilt because your actions have no long term effects. You can do whatever you want

>>37337117
I tried that but it's got to the point where I can't even imagine these nice things happening to me because the idea that something I want would actually happeb to me

>>37336490
I'm not even bothering trying to lift your spirits because I know you're simply being a attention seeker.
>"waaaah i'm 18 muh life is turrible xD"
Kid, you literally have no fucking clue what the difficulties of life are. Believe me when I say this, little whiny bitches like wouldn't last a fucking second in my world.

Now shut your fucking cunt mouth up, go outside and live your life. Little bitch.

>>37337198
I can't though I can't even have a conversation with someone without over analysing everything they say and getting self conscious about what I'm saying, it's like constant bad paranoia in everything I do

>>37337273
And what hard world do you live in then big man what makes your struggles more signicant than mine?

>>37336490

If your life is already bleak and pointless then why do you want to make it even worse?

Death is the ultimate bleakness and pointlessness.

If you live you have a potential chance to make your life better in the future.

If you die, you are fucked forever, think about what that really means.

OP, it does get better. It sounds dumb but what helped me was a therapist. You really remind me of myself two yrs ago. I believe in you and i hope you feel better