>"Police! We have a search warrant for your harddrives!"

Flush as many ounces of hard drive as you can and hide the hard drive plants.

>>37014350
panic and open my pc case and smash it

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Sure officer, just hold on a sec.

>>37014350
What would happen if you destroyed in hardrive in this case?

>>37014377
>>37014386
Why?

rg3w

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these are not mine officer, they are my mommys

Ojay, just please ignore the 250 gigs of porn and the tranny flash drive

Rip it out of the pc and throw it in the microwave

>>37014395

Destruction of evidence charge I think

>>37014397
I've seen incriminating images and I have illegal vidya games

>>37014417
Why would you do that?

rwpqr

Fuck, I knew torrenting Farm Simulator 2017 was going to haunt me.

>>37014350
>How do you react?

Activate the cum collider

>>37014437
>I've seen incriminating images
Story? Details?

>>37014434
That's it? Oh thank God

I don't even have anything to hide beisdes pirated games, but I would still turn my pc off. And some darknet drug shti.
Every HDD is encrypted with bitlocker. As long as they don't suspect me being the head of a major cp or terrorism ring, I'm safe.

>>37014350
>How do you react?
Demand to show me the warrent, argue and call a lawyer for advice.

>>37014442
>browse 4chan
>anon posts cheese pizza
>this image is now in some hidden image cache on your HD
>get v&
better safe than sorry

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>>37014459
the thing I've seen are so bad Mr. FBI I can't take it. here's a preview of the type of stuff I've seen

>>37014434
They can't prove I didn't destroy it before they got there.

>y-yeah, sure. H-here you go. I like to save funny pictures that make me laugh. Wanna see

>o-oh, those frogs? They're called pepe and helper

>you can just fast forward through the porn...

>wait, is that a man pretending to be a woman? I guess that got on with a virus haha.

>oh..okay. well if you guys want, I can send you the link.

>alright officer, bye

>>37014483
holy shit delete this right now

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>>37014350
Good luck sorting through 4460 files.

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>at airport
>"Are you Anon?"
>"We need to check your laptop, sir"
>"Put in your password and we'll be back in half an hour."
How do you react?

>>37014350
set off the 2 pipebombs under my chair

if they want to send me to prison they will have to scrape me off the walls

>>37014397

Are you retarded? You don't flush hard drives you tard and there are no such things as hard drive plants.

Sure officer go right ahead

>Sees I've just got the OS installed along with some frog pictures and other pics on one SSD and installed games on the other SSD
>All the while all my torrented anime/music/movies/tv shows/porn are on an external hidden inside a book with a back-up external hidden inside my draw

I would cry and be sad because I need my hard drives and who knows how long they will keep them. I just got a bunch of new shows and books last week after a long time without downloading. I'd have to use netflix or a library like a faggot who can't download shit.

>>37014486
>it
What would that be?

>>37014434
Considering what's likely on those people's hard drives, that's probably a much better charge.

I've had an old laptop taken away almost 3 years ago. nothing happened since. if they take my new one that I'm using I'm going to be beyond pissed cause I don't work anymore

>>37014589
>Considering what's likely on those people's hard drives
What do you mean?

>>37014606
>>37014478
originale post here

Activate the magnets

Do you have a warrant? Am I being detained? I invoke my fifth amendment rights! I want a lawyer! I am a sovereign citizen!

>>37014486
It will be your word versus the state's word in court.

Guess who is going to win.

>>37014606
You're on 4chan and interacting with some of the lowest forms of human life in existence. I'm sure you can take a guess.

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>>37014350
>tfw you hard drive is full of lewds of yourself
>tfw handsome police officer starts looking at it
>he calls me a naughty boi
>then he lets me dominate his thicc cop ass

>>37014592
They never gave it back? How is that legal? Sounds like they just wanted new computers for the lab.

>>37014592
>don't work
>get mad at other people when you can't pay for things
Sound logic anon

>>37014654
>I'm sure you can take a guess.
Help me out.

>>37014350
Don't even care at this point. I'm sure they're fine somthing questionable on my computer.
>Hmmmm, this picture looked like it could be a teenager, better have an expert examine it.
My life is such shit that I'd rather just die.

>>37014668
they suspected me of having shit but I didn't and here I am
>>37014677
I went back to my old town to go back to school and stay at home after to care for my schizophrenic mother- she will wander out the house if I don't stay around long enough. otherwise I've worked for 11 years before that

>>37014483
You madman. How do you live with yourself?

>>37014740
>they suspected me of having shit
What and why?

>>37014531
Pics of bomz pls

>>37014350
I've actually done this before, except I had a bunch of plants growing in my guest bedroom's closet.

First, this is quite stressful. The cops generally won't be bothering you unless they're pretty sure you're up to shenanigans.

Respond to their call through the door with something along the lines of "I am Anon, I am unarmed and opening the door." Make sure to talk loudly, and get an affirmative from the cops outside they understand you.

Open the door just enough to allow you to exit, then IMMEDIATELY turn around and lock the door. Then talk to whomever is in charge, and read the warrant. READ THE GODDAMN WARRANT. You will be really stressed and embarrassed, and I can practically guarantee your neighbors will all come out to see what's going on. But read the warrant, take two minutes to figure out if it is valid, what the cops are searching for and any other restrictions they have for the warrant.

Once this is over, admit to a house search, then request (respectfully) that you be allowed to monitor the police while they conduct their warrant search.

>>37014770
it was a pepe image shitting on an a baby with a smug face. I thought it was funny and it was on this damn board that I found it on lol. I used it on another board one day and was banned for it. a year later police came and never seen em again. they probably saw that I don't have anything else on my laptop except for other poopoo pepe's but didn't see the pepe that got me banned and left me alone

>>37014681
>low key asking for someone to post cheese pizza

Just kill yourself already pedo scum

>>37014483
MODS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD

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>>37014350
>"Sure, officer."

>>37014350
Have a magnet and destroy everything on every hardware you have.

>>37014831
>I thought it was funny
The original sure isn't. I saw it on /b/, it made me rage.

Why didn't you get your laptop back?

>>37014350
>How do you react?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CiBI0yrtHUo

>>37014854
What the fuck are you talking about you pervert?

>>37014889
I went to a lawyer and asked him about this a few months after waiting. he said they have the right to keep it and they also have tons of other people's shit that is in a backlog waiting to be searched. he said it'll take up to 6 months but after 2 years I bought a new laptop and said fuck it. and besides the lawyer told me that they will practically destroy it by taking pieces apart and some will even have shit installed to monitor you. there's no point

>>37014955
Fucking pigs. I hate cops

>>37014955
>after 2 years I bought a new laptop
What were you using for 2 years and what was your reaction when the partyvan came?

>>37014972
indeed. I just made it a point to filter certain words on 4chanx now and avoid anything questionable. hell, I haven't even been banned for dumb things on blue boards as I don't ever want another police situation again
>>37014998
was using my wife's desktop. luckily it was near tax time and we just bought a new desktop computer. I hate desktops but we shared it anyway until I got sick of it. before the desktop I used a kindle tablet that they haven't found

>>37014350
All my porn is hidden inside a folder of gigabytes of categorized my little pony porn

If they are willing to sort through all horse pussy then I guess they deserve it

>>37015043
>I just made it a point to filter certain words on 4chanx now and avoid anything questionable
The issue is your retarded reposting of child scat porn.

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>>37014377
>>37014386
>>37014391
>>37014395
>>37014409
>>37014416
>>37014417
>>37014437
>>37014447
>>37014451
>>37014467
>>37014478
>>37014483
>>37014486
>>37014520
>>37014531
>>37014546
>>37014650
>>37014737
>>37014831
>>37014887
>>37015083
Sir, you are being detained, please do not resist and step in the vehicle. Our forensic lab will investigate your computer for evidence of mysogny which is punishable by lifetime in jail.

>>37015161
I know that asshole but adding on filters for threads and posts makes it so I don't even make the mistake of going into threads that has that type of shit on purpose. like I said I never looked at that image as anything else but funny.. my humor is dark but whatever. never in my mind did I thought of it as anything else. it was a mistake

>>37014350
I react by completely losing my shit beyond all comprehension. I have nothing incriminating but I have nightmares about that shit still. My parents used to do regular sweeps of my shit and even the tiniest thing they didn't like they'd punish me with. I don't like people seeing my shit now including just about anything I look at or listen to. People think I'm weird because I refuse to watch TV, listen to music, watch movies or read in front of anybody. I need to be completely alone when I'm doing these things. If the police came in and touched my stuff I'd lose my shit so fucking far and fast. Fuck. That. I've had enough of people fucking with my shit for several lifetimes over.

>>37014350
>o-okay officer
>just shitty simulator games I play and some shooters plus /k/ reaction images

>>37015274
>so I don't even make the mistake of going into threads that has that type of shit on purpose
That won't get you arrested, sharing child scat porn will though, you fucking retard.

>>37015285
>even the tiniest thing they didn't like they'd punish me with
Example?
>I have nothing incriminating but I have nightmares about that shit still.
Not buying it.

t. NSA

>>37015323
you can be banned for posting in a thread that has another anon sharing or talking about that stuff, you know?

>>37014350
>How do you react?
Panic in my head because there's embarrassing stuff but absolutely nothing illegal so don't die of a panic attack.

Already happened because of a false tip.

Didn't sleep for a week.

nothing to hide, nothing to fear
If you are on Linux you can use the shred command to quickly delete everything.

>>37014483
Absolutely the worst thing I have ever seen on 4chan

>>37015426
I'd rather get temporarily "banned" ;) than arrested for sharing child scat porn like you have.

>>37015517
>>37015480
what is your fascination with repeatedly saying that?

>>37015435
What was the false tip about, who did that and why?

>>37015536
Because I'm shocked that someone would actually save that shit (pun intended) and actually repost it thinking nothing will happen.

>>37015571
I did because I saw the image a million times and it stayed up on threads until they died. but we're going in circles. whatever

>>37015616
>the image
Describe it, I just want to make sure we're talking about the same thing here.

>>37014350
FUCK DA POLICE

*SUICIDES*

Original as illegal archive

>>37014524
you can't be forced to enter the password
say no and leave, it's legal

not american but they have some kind of amendment that prevents people from asking you to incriminate yourself
entereing your password is part of this

biometrics are however not, so if you have a fingerprint lock on your phone, they can put your thumb on it and enter

>>37015723
>they can put your thumb on it
What if you resist?

>>37015859
Resisting arrest. I.e. Obstruction charge in the civilized world, and a shot in the back of you live in Americastan

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3KPSyNxnL8

>>37015958
What if I ask "Am I being detained or am I free to go?" after I'm asked to put my thumb on it?

>>37016068
in europe if its not ICE then they need a warrant to search a device
in this case you would definitely be under arrest

idk about america, do they need warrants too? if yes, you are most definitely also being detained

>>37014350
They'll find some odd things on my hard drives and I'll certainly get some odd looks, but I won't be arrested.
I'd ask to see their warrant and badges and then let them in to have a look at my hard drives.

Just open the door, since I'm not retarded enough to save anything that could come back to bite me.

>>37016068
>>37016152
Not sure about the States, but here in Canada they have the right to search any device they can access after arrest. If they can access it by pressing it up against your thumb, they can go through it before you lawyer up. Same thing with laptops. If there's a password they can't break into it without a warrant, though.

>>37016172
>odd things
such as?

There are two options

1.) Turn on incognito mode
2.) Dial the decrease wanted level number from GTA 4 on your phone.

>>37016219
Some odd vidya, shit tier memes, gore pictures, some odd music, my personal writings, etc.
Nothing illegal though.

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>>37016196
>Without a warrant
>Implying getting a warrant is difficult

Ya'll are fucked

>>37016256
Yeah but if you're not a complete retard you'll get a lawyer before they get the warrant, and that can make things easier for you

>>37014531
Fuck off hector

>>37014350
Okay, let's see the warrant, then

None of you should be worried if you don't have any CP on you, literally wouldn't care as long as I'm getting them back

>>37016507
>CP is the only illegal thing in the world
Anon...

>>37016541
What other illegal shit can you have on your computer?
Can't really think on any other than dealing drugs maybe? Scamming people or fraud

w-will I get arrested for pirating comic books?

>>37016558
Pirated movies, vidya, music, etc.
That's about everything. CP, piracy, and any incriminating chat logs for anything from drug dealing to soliciting sex.
I'm still safe though.

>>37016558
Depends on where you live. Things like loli and zoophilia aren't protected by the first amendment in most countries.
While the piracy scare is mostly dead, cops can still fuck your shit up for it if they feel like it.

O shit not my steam library :(

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>>37014657
why can't these wet t shirt things ever be showed from the front side?

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>that one time on /mu/ I downloaded the album that shall not be named, and deleted it right after listening to a bit of it

shit shit shit they can't find evidence of that can they?

>>37016847
What was the music album about?

>>37016711
Damnit now i need to fap

>not gay

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>>37014350
>show officer my tits (boy)
I think you should come back some other day ;)

>>37016468
>>37014531
Audiblekek.wav

>>37015273

>during the trial I pull out the recording of the police miss-gendering me during my arrest
>all charges dropped

>>37014350
Let them search it because there is nothing illegal on my hard drives.

>>37014350
I hope you like tranny porn officer :)

>>37014531
Why did I laugh so hard at this

>>37015723
True, but they can hold you for a very long time until you comply, or seize your device and copy the data. If you miss your flight they won't refund you.

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/02/14/business/border-enforcement-airport-phones.html?_r=0

>Agents had inspected 4,444 cellphones and 320 other electronic devices in 2015.

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>>37014520
that's absolutely nothing, this is my archive directory alone

>>37014350
I already erased my pitza I guess. Used to have several videos I got from classmates in my youth, I thought it was pretty harmless since I never distirbuted it, but paranoia got the best of me, so I erased all of it.

P.S. Still have the videos I got from girls over 18. One of them took the pics one day after her 18th birthday. Pretty sweet.

Nothing to see.
Um. I think you have the wrong house, sir/ma'am.

>>37014350
Immediate suicide by gunshot

>>37019646
>tfw have to suicide by butter knife
Just nuke Europe already.

Wonder where's Hillary when you need her

>>37014350
But i don't have any hard drives, only SSDs

>>37019664
We Europeans are the kings of suicide. You are just making up excuses. Come on, fellow eurobot, let's show those colonies how it gets done!

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>>37014350
Apparently my friend's Internet/phone company shut off his internet for torrenting movies. His mom picked up the phone and claimed it was probably someone else using it because they didn't have a password set.

So they put it back on.

>>37015723
There's this thing called "The border exception" Where you're technically not in the US until you pass through customs, so you have no rights.

>>37014350
I give them my clean laptop and clean external HDD. I have qubes installed on a tiny usb drive that I could swallow if I need to.

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>>37014350
Statists fuck off REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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>not going to jail but the cops are going to laugh at my stupid ass and all my muscle argonian characters in skyrim

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That's cute

Go right ahead

>>37014350
Walk to the Door with a throbbing .5 inch erection