Slow board thread

>>36656065
>Shitposting theme
Moth Equals - Influx (usually have this shit on repeat): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xcu_SVGokco

>Hopes for my future
Well right now I'm in the process of joining the military. I have MEPS this coming Thursday. I'm not really sure what to expect but I'm hoping it works out well so I can call myself a soldier and finally get started on my life. Socially speaking, I'm going to try and not care too much about being cringing and failing a social interaction or being rejected. If you want to improve you have to act. This my goal: Acting, saying more.

>Where did it all go wrong?
Crappy parents, abusive parents, isolated home life, bullied school life. I was doomed from the start.

>Do you plan to commit suicide?
If the Army doesn't work out for some reason, I'm going back to square one and getting a minimum wage job just so I can save up and buy a gun and hopefully end it. 22 and working at some fucking retail hell while living with parents? Fuck that.

Well, the threads here.

>>36656065
No I usually just have spotify or pandora open.
Navy and hopefully soon. The last bit of weight just wont come off and I'm still weak.
I'd say around 2004 ish when my parents randonly secided they would give up on direction and let us do whatever. The siblings are brats and I'm a directionless depressive.
I'd rather not die since I want to get something out of existence but all options are always on the table.
>>36656293
Ay namefag has somethong in common with me. Good luck with meps. What are you shooting for?

>>36656065
you're supposed to make separate threads for each shitpost, not roll them all into one.

fucking amateur.

>>36656465
>Hands-off parenting
Yeah, once my crazy ass mother was arrested that's how my father raised me. No guidance, no advice, can't really talk to him about...things. I was just kind of expected to "get by". It wasn't bad, but I wanted more, I guess. Never got it.
>>36656465
I am OP by the way. I'm honestly hoping for some desk job at this point: 42A. I wanted to do Infantry but I don't see a point at this point in time. I hear all they do is janitorial shit. Atleast with 42A I can get a secret clearance and how no problem finding a desk job and at worst I can learn a trade when I get out. How about you?

>>36656543
Live and learn, mi amigo. .

A very original bump
How was that not fucking original?

>>36656576
I'm torn between intel, nuke, and it. All three are memes but I have a math degree and need to do something with it.

>hopes for future
I hoping to get a PhD in physics don't really know what to specialise in yet though radiation looks good. I'm also hoping to not be a fat fuck and to actually get a girlfriend all the girls i have a chance with now are taken so i have to lose the chub to get to higher tier.

>>36656941
Good luck, man! Just get what you think you will enjoy the most. That's how I'm viewing the Army since I intend to make a career out of it.
>>36656957
That's cool and an admirable goal but what about the other stuff in the OP?

>I'm really into the band ex deo right now, so something along their lines

>don't really have any hopes, at this point im just staying alive so I don't fuck up my family

>I wasnt challenged at all as a kid, until I was 16 I got top marks in school without trying so I was rewarded without doing work, combined with not having any responsibilities at home apart from when I was punished I developed an aversion to hard work. When things got harder at school I slowed down a lot and dropped out. Got a couple good jobs but left both because of mentioned aversion. Developed depression problems and problems I don't know how to explain but I have major problems with seeing reality and living in the real world. From December to March I was seeing some a mental health nurse on a weekly basis. She started saying that theres not much else she can say because I have such trouble putting work into fixing myself. I feigned wellness so I could be discharged. the psychologist I sometimes saw was an ass. Told him about wanting to die, but didn't want to try because of my younger brother looking up to me, and not having a reliable way of doing it. He replied with "if you really wanted to kill yourself you'd have done it by now". He wants me to go back on the 8th but I'm going to call in and refuse all treatment.

>I plan on suiciding sometime soon, bills are stacking up and I don't have a job. Already a few hundred into overdraft with no savings. I'll leave a note but idk what to say yet.


Sorry for #3 being a diary

>>36657232
You've nothing to apologize, bud. If you've got more to say then please do, it's no trouble here. The whole reason I'm clinging to life is kind of similar. If I killed myself now, it'd probably mess up my Dad. So I force myself to look forward, you know? You're psychologist called your bluff when you bought up suicide? Fuck that guy. If you can find someone else, or heck, you'd be better of venting here. I can give you my throwaway and you can talk to me. Life sucks, man.

I'm still here and this bump proves it..