ITT: Times you were alpha as fuck >oneitis confesses her

>cashier tells me to have a good day
>tell her to fuck off

>>36230614
Fuck you
Sincerely,
A cashier

>walking past a middle school
>kids at recess
>one kid calls me fat
>say nothing
>open the gate
>walk onto the playground
>go up to the kid
>everybody shuts up
>teachers start running towards me
>kick the kid as hard as i can in the balls
>scream "FUCK YOU FAGGOT"
>kids start freaking out
>kid who mocked me throws up on himself
>sprint away

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art class in high school was a pretty alpha time for me

>girl reaching for paint bottle
>snatch it before she can grab it and stare at her while she gives me a disgusted look
>when im finished I put it back down and close it as she reaches for it again

>some roastie that talks in memes to try to fit in
>tells me I listen to weird music (listened to gabbercore and retrowave)
>"I don't remember asking your ass"

>same chick at my table calls me weird
>one of my earphones didnt work so she didn't realize I could hear her
>throw my paint water in her face made sure it fucked her caked up face up real good.

>get falsely accused of being isis
>get interrogated and tortured
>talk to russian mob spies once
>get tortured and interrogated
>didn't tell shillary a thing, still alive
>now i am the law

all because some dude was rich enough to be a pedophile legally

>>36230680
>engaging in a fight with a middle schooler
>alpha

jesus h christ anon

>be me
>6 years ago
>talking with other outsiders about Skyrim
>Brad (5'9 / rich parents / arrogant) comes and talks shit like always
>We ignore him
>Brad left
>about 5 Minutes later
>Brad comes back
>I tell him to get lost
>He answers with a You Mom Insult
>I grab him by his throat
>punch him 2 Times on the nose
>he is bleeding
>push him into the bushes

>>36230602
>oneitis
>tell her to fuck off

i do not comprehend

>>36230925
>>"I don't remember asking your ass"
Anon. That's the type of comeback someone with downs syndrome would think is clever and funny.

>>36230680
oh my, you really think this is alpha, don't you

ITT robots act extroverted and autstic but think it's alpha

>walking in the school yard
>bully insults me from behind and wants to start a fight
>he shoves me
>get pissed and shove the bastard back
>teacher comes and breaks it up
>never touches me again, just he and his friend call me names for half a year until they get kicked out of school
>years later learn from a teacher that the police is searching for him and his friend for stealing and breaking shit
>he is probably in prison now

Take that you fucking piece of human shit.

>be me
>last weekend
>couple of hood nigs accuse me of stealing their weed
>they won't listen to reason
>I offer to call the police for them
>"fuck you white boy"
>they drive off

For once in my life I didn't roll over and do nothing while someone else tried to walk over me.

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Ha
You cucked yourself

>>36230602
>Be on bus a year ago.
>Some crazy guy gets on the bus, he just seems to be on drugs. About 40 something yo.
>The bus is packed so he has to stand, which he does, next to me and two old women sitting down.
>He started saying shit loudly, you know, the usual behaviour you would find outside a club late at night.
>Now he is saying shit to the two women sitting down.
>I'm 6 feet tall and 240 pounds, so a fatass, but still intimidating to someone of an average size.
>Put my hand in his shoulder and tell him to stop talking and get off the next stop.
>He quiets down and actually does get off.
>Be a hero for 5 seconds.

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>do you want a receipt?
>no.

>>36234610
I kekd. Gj anon, that is funny

>Be 17, coming back from exchange year.
>At the airport I see a girl with the same bagpack I had from the company who organizes the exchange program.
>I remember seeing her on the trip to the country at the beginning of the year along with another 50 or 60 students. Never talked to her.
>She sees me and sees the bagpack, so walks up to me and we start talking about our year abroad, the school, pretty usual stuff.
>Both of then happen to be on the same flight as me.
>We do the check in together, the sit us together.
>We get to the seats and they sit one in each side of me. Which was weird, but I just thought they might be a bit tired of each other from the trip, so just go along with it.
>It's a 12 hour flight, we all fall sleep at some point.
>Wake up, have them both sleeping on my shoulders.
>The one I knew from before wakes up shortly after, we are almost landing.
>She looks at my with a tired gaze, and I'm not doing any better, We are exhausted.

This is where I ask you brobots to believe what follows, because it's the most alpha thing that ever happened to me.

>After looking at each other in the eyes for a few seconds, the first thing i could come up with was "I've never kissed anyone on a plane"
>She says she neither.
>We kiss.
>All of this with her friend still sleeping in my other shoulder.
>Begin landing, she wakes up.
>Conversation goes on as if nothing happened.
>They leave, I still have luggage to pick up.
>Add the girl on fb.
>Never talked again.

>>36234792
Forgot to add that She was travelling back to our country with a friend she had made in her school for the summer. Thats the girl that remained asleep during the kiss.

Sucks to spend 5 minutes typing a greentext and realize afterwards you forgot something crucial.

>>36234792
Post proof or it didn't happen you tard

>>36234843
Yeah, let me get the recording of the 12 hour plane trip in which you can hear our conversation clearly. Sorry for being unreasonable.

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>female acknowledges my existence
>ignore her
alpha af

>making out with new gf
>we just finished fugging, I was getting ready to drive home (2 hour drive)
>she's sitting on the edge of her bed, I'm standing in front of her, between her legs
>she's begging me to atleast let her blow me before I leave
>i take her hand and slowly place it on my bulge
>she leaves her hand on my crotch, looks at me with these huge "fuck me eyes"
>tell her I'm gonna make her wait until the next time I visit
Felt alpha man.
I ended up letting her blow me anyways.

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>guy asks me if i want to try a free sample
>pay him anyway because i'm rich

>>36234859
So. You're lying on the internet get a life. And stop pretending to be a normie this shit didn't even happen the whore would've accused you of rape as soon as her head touched your shoulder.

>first and only time asking a girl out, in middle school
>she rejects me
>go home and cry for only 15 minutes

>>36234912
>Not crying in front of her. Proving that you are alpha enough to show emotion

>>36234907
k

Origorigorigorigorig

>>36234934
Yeah. Thought as much

>>36234387
She wasn't a virgin anymore

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>>36234940
Nothing personnel, kid.

P.S. GG on your first attempt at an alpha behaviour. Shame it was through the internet.

>>36234955
KeK. Learn to spell personal. You autist

>>36234955
checkd and rekt

originnnnn

>>36230925
>tells me I listen to weird music (listened to gabbercore and retrowave)

If she thinks retrowave is weird then something's wrong with her.

>>36234624
Alpha as fook yo

This happened when I was a teen.

>have friend
>we fight sometimes but always make up
>we would meet every friday
>sometimes I would go to his house on friday only to learn from the family member who opened the door he has gone to visit his other friends without telling me anything
>this has happened multiple fucking times
>it's friday
>got a new game I really wanted to play, contact him via psn to tell him I can't make it today
>the prick has the nerve to send me this message
>"if you don't want to be friends anymore just say so"
>tell him to FUCK OFF and insult his piece of shit mother
>block him
>never hear from him again

No regrets.
He would always tell me he what he does with his friends and of course never invite me.
The day I stopped being a cuck.

>>36234986
remove baitpost

>>36235211
what kind of fucking psycho normie gets a piggy killed like that

>>36235253
I have no idea what you're talking about. Nothing to see here mods. Please don't fucking ban me again.

>>36235292
https://desu-usergeneratedcontent.xyz/r9k/image/1492/08/1492086402638.webm
here yare yous got is
that piggy was stupid

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>>36230602
>end of primary school
>upcoming prom kind of thing
>have no female friends and no one to go with
>most guys are still at "girls are ewww" stage so most girls are free
>scared i'll end up going alone as there were more guys than girls in my class and I knew no one outside of it
>the cutest girl wasn't asked out yet, because everyone was affraid
>found her number in phonebook as a creep I am, since no balls to do it in person
>call her home number (pre cellphone/social media times) and ask if she wants to go together
>she said yes
not sure if she liked me or it was out of pity
but it was nice to see all guys jealous
despite good looks she was pretty cool as well
not sure if i could utilize on it and make a move, was too beta anyway

we went to same hs later on and I had my last prom dance with her there as well
it was nice

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>mom tells me she feels extremely lonely
>asks how I would feel about her having a boyfriend
>call her a fat useless whore and tell her to fuck off
btfo

>>36235594
You should encourage your mother to find someone. At least one of you will be happy then.

>>36235647
fuck you, mommy belongs to me and ONLY me. Capice?

>>36235489
the only mistake that piggy made was trusting that human being

>walk home with my oneitis
>okay anon time to shine
>jam my hands into my pockets and say nothing the whole journey
bet she was wet af, bitches love stoic guys

>>36230925
>throws paint on a girl
>alpha

are you retarded anon?

>>36235901
are you gay?
lmao kys

>>36234481
you pushed a kid and then the teacher came in to break it up before he could turn you into mush

and then now he's acting bad so youre alpha or something?

kill yourself anon

>>36230602
>>oneitis confesses her love for me
>>tell her to fuck off
>> wake up
>> reality comes crashing back down
>> profusely weep as I jack off to furry porn in my mom's basement

>>36235934
lol same YAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSS

>>36230602
you aren't alpha OP you're a fucking retard

>>36232863
kek, playing Skyrim rn

>>36230602
>game of footie on the schoolyard
>I'm not playing
>ball gets kicked out of play
>I kick it back into play
>chad who kicked it out gets mad that the other team took the ball when I kicked it back into play
>walks over to me screaming incomprehensible insults and obscenities
>promptly gives my a swift knee to the balls
>I smile at him without showing an iota of discomfort, barely even batted an eyelid
After this point I never experienced physical bullying again.

>>36230680
you did nothing wrong, desu senpai

>>36235690
>bitches love stoic guys
i don't remember last time i spoke to a girl
should i change my name to xXxPu$$y_d3$Tr0y3RxXx

>>36234450
>ITT robots act extroverted and autstic but think it's alpha

If robots could tell the difference, they wouldn't be robots.

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>gf hasn't spent a night with me in weeks
>excuse after excuse
>i have to work tonight
>im going out with my sister who i havent seen in weeks
>my grandmother is in the hospital
>it got so bad i cheated on her
>end up in hospital
>she doesnt even come to see me
>gets upset when i break up with her
>she still wants to be friends
>tell her to fuck off

>all of these normies missing the point of /r9k/
Why are you here? This board has established it's own culture of losers after it's creation and it has always been this way. Why are you trying to change this? By constantly posting like a normie you are essentially destroying this boards culture and turning it into a board of bullshit.
/r9k/, the soon to be Brazil of 4chan?

>>36236563

Because some of you might have a shot at a happy life, but you'll never get there if you spend your time wallowing in an echo-chamber of butt-tears and anger. If this place falls apart, the truly hopeless can go to wizchan and the rest might actually get a life.

>be walking in ghetto area at night
>guy walks up to me and attempts to rob me
>laugh at him and walk past him
>he pulls out a pistol and says that he'll shoot me
>me not caring about dying makes me think I could take advantage of this opportunity
>walk right back
>I yell, "DO ME A FUCKING FAVOR A PULL THE TRIGGER"
>he pushes me back and puts the gun away
>"Holy shit you have a ton of problems"
>I say, "Fuck off, you're waving a gun around with no intention to shoot"
>he calls me crazy then walks away
>walk back home

>>36230680
Lmao. Now THIS is funny. Tell me more like this anon.

>>36230614
Made me fucking kek

>>36237378
Original Alpha as fuck.

>>36237378
WW3 is gonna be ugly

>>36237378

That never happened.
I tell you that never happened.
This man is a liiiiiiiaaaar.
I tell you that never haaaaappeeeeened.

>be me
>12 years old
>9/10 Stacy wants to take advantage of me by asking for money
>She comes to me with a friend during break
>tells me to give her money
>I rem,remember that she is worthless and not worth anything
>tell her to fuck off

>>36237777
>remember

852301

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>in high school
>have hangover
>waiting for greyhound bus to another city
>some big nignog walks into bus station
>begins signing loudly
>"uh mup doot bap dee dee-"
>"YO STOP SIGNING pls"

shut him up good.

>>36236483
/thread if you'd like, or keep going
it's a good extroverted autism thread

>>36230602
One of the girls I liked in middle school asked me to dance at prom. I make a half assed joke and me and all my bros laugh. After that she walked away disappointed. That was the dumbest fucking decision and I regret it.

>be in middle school
>class qt asks me out
>"ew, no girls are yucky"

Alpha as hell

>>36236560
What the fudge
Was this written by a human

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>>36230602
1 case:
>wake up feeling like a boss
>going to shop for potato salad
>5th graders are standing in the way talking
>doesn't see anyone around, so people have to walk around
>as I am coming closer I give a loud whistle
>no reaction
>ram trough little faggots
>with the corner of my eye catch their confused faces

2nd instance:
>meet a woman 5 years older than me
>she is nice but 4/10
>griendzone her
>tell her to fuck off after 2 months of stalking

>>36237772
>believing this doesn't happen
>>36237755
this
>>36237378
well done, freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose

>>36230602
>Co-worker tries flirting with me
>Don't reciprocate and never talk to her
Alpha as fuck if I don't say so myself to be desu

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>>36232212

?

What the f happened.

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>be me 15 years old blackbot autist
>eating a watamellun
>white cracka come up
>fuckin nigga kkk 666 hella dank smoke dat weed 420
>throw the watamellun up his asshole and take him to church
>mom call my ass to eat lunch (kfc)
>"get yo bitch ass up he nigga shit fuckin done"
biggie starts playin dam son that rap shit was good FUK AYY
>cracka kid cry his bitch ass out falls down on the floor
>pissin himself
>"i'm sorry i was jokin"
>"sukk my dick bitch"
>pull down my pants and piss in his mouth
>he start movin like a fish with piss all ova his michael jackson face, crying bitch
>"i'm comin ho"
>we eat sum fried chicken. dad comes home from the watamellun plantation
>"lil nigga did you beat that white boy? he fukin cried to his momma"
>"ye"
>"that's my lil nigga dam BITCH"
>watch bill cosby with the niggas
that was a good day dam

>>36238017

> Co-worker asks to borrow my stapler.
> I've so autistic that I just freeze up like a deer in the headlights.
> So socially inept and desperate that I actually think she was flirting with me.

>at bus stop
>qt 3.14 Korean girl tries to talk to me
>ignore her
>get on bus
>qt 3.14 Korean sits right next to me and try to start up a conversation again
>put my earphones on and ignore her again
>bus gets to my stop and as I'm leaving I see that she is about to cry


I wish I talked to her but my anxiety and fear of rejection impedes my want to connect with others

>>36236008
why don't you play something good instead?

>walking past some middle schoolers who are arguing about where to eat
>one of them says that mcdonalds is way better than burger king
>forcefully say that it isn't as I walk past
>their jaws drop as I walk off like an alpha

>>36238144
>fear of rejection

If she was flirting with you as aggressively as you say and you were worried about getting rejected, you might want to consider therapy. I'm not trying to be mean; you really might have some clinical-level issue; this is not routine shyness.

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>>36238587
>one of them says that mcdonalds is way better than burger king

should have fucking shot him desu

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>>36238587
>mcdonalds is way better than burger king
>mfw
Good on you, anon.

>>36230602
you didn't get the girl
uh pal you do not realize everybody considers the opposite alpha?

>fat ugly spic stacy sits next to me at school during lunch in middle school
>one day she's bragging to all her friends about a confession she's going to make at lunch to me
>the next day people are laughing and giggling at me telling me whats about to go down at lunchtime
>try to ignore it come lunch time and sit down to eat
>fat spic sits next to me
>everybody leaning in, all the chads teasing me
>can't take the embarrassment this fucking stupid fat monstrous whore is ruining my peaceful lunch
>anon I
>FUCK OFF FAT CUNT
>jump across the table to an seat that is always open because nobody usually sits close to me
>people dying of laughter, all the ghetto nig nogs chimping out laughing, patting me on the back
>a bunch of the cool chads and nogs do that cool nodding and finger pointing thing at me going ey anon, and thas wassup bro

I gotta admit for a few seconds I felt on top, I felt fucking good, I felt like I belonged, almost like I could've been one of them and it was just another day in the life of me the cool version of anon who does cuhrazy stuff and makes everyone laugh.

That was the only time that happened and everybody forgot I existed the day after. Nothing like that ever happened again.

>be me showering after gym class idk the grade maybe 7 or 8
>girls come to the window to see the guys(chad) naked
>they get to see my beautiful penis instead(it is curved to the right or left i really don't want to take my pants off now)
>the girls saw other guys too but they come to me joking
>the girl that comes to me wants me to be her pet or some other shit to make her feel powerful or she will tell everyone about the shape of my dick
> i just laugh at her and say to her to tell everyone
>she procedds to do it and everyone laughts in her face
>i joke around and tell she liked so much my dick she is telling everyone
>failed stacey btfo

>>36239230
Do you live in a hentai VN?

>>36230614
I kek'd
Love,
Former cashier

>>36239341
i wish.
19khv here.

>Lesbian friends want to have a kid
>They decide on which one will, but the other still wanted it
>Trying with the one, they're loving the experience and looking forward to it
>The other feels left out and upset hearing how happy the one trying is, she wants it too
>They end up changing their mind, and if I'd stick around to help instead of the original arrangement which was just knock the one up no strings attached, then the other one wants a baby too

Ended up with both pregnant and happy about it. Though I do realize it was a stupid thing to do since they can fuck me over for child support anytime.

>>36238454
>Skyrim isnt the best Bethesda game nor a good game.
Kys

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>get stopped in the subway station by one of those hippie activist faggots that solicit donations for organizations
>she starts telling me about how we desperately need to conserve our city's water because it's so great and we're using too much of it
>ask her what her bosses are doing about the fucking xenoestrogens in our water that are giving us cancer and killing sperm cells, or the toxic chemicals that are turning the goddamn frogs into hermaphrodites
>she's visibly taken aback and quickly changes the subject

>>36230602
>be known as smart but awkward guy
>walking past the Stacey table
>strong, quick gait
>"Anon Stacey-3 thinks she's sick"
>walk right up to her
>raise her head by her chin with my left hand
>place my whole right palm on her forehead to check for fever
>use my left hand on the forehead of the astonished Stacey-2 to compare temperatures
>"You're not sick"
>start to walk away
>"Anon, why don't you sit with us?"
>"I have a test"
>resume walking away

I've never before or since had that level of decisiveness and frame-control.