Alrighty boys, what's the best way to induce cancer?

>>36132963
reading 90% of r9k's threads

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>>36132982
Do you have any serious suggestions?

>>36133069
Yes, but the Hippocratic Oath prevents me from sharing them with you, anon

>>36132963
mutation of the p53 pathway

>>36133119
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh wait, you were serious, anon


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

At least spend more than 2 mins on google next time

Sneak into a nuclear facility and drink some waste water. Smoking like 7 packs a day could probably also work pretty fast.

>>36133086
FUCKING TELL ME

>>36133142
Do you have a cheaper way?

>>36133134
as far as I can remember and tell from quick google it's a tumor suppression pathway, so if it's mutated it leads to unregulated proliferation of abnormal cells. Might not be the best way but I don't see how I'm wrong

Turn on a microwave oven and hug it for 2 hours

>>36133283
If cigs are too expensive you could smoke heroin, idk how carcinogenic it is but anecdotally I know a guy who used to smoke heroin and has never smoked cigs has full blown lung cancer at 30 ish.

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>>36133454
I say cigs are too expensive and you suggest an even more expensive drug?

Go to Chernobyl and touch the Elephant's Foot

>>36133454
Pure heroin is not carcinogenic.

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>>36133610
hold your balls into a microwave.
this is where your chances to get cancer is the highest because there the cells regenerates the fastest in your whole body, if i remember right.
i also saw this in south park.

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Does no-one know a surefire way to get cancer?

>>36133610
Heroin is only more expensive in the short run, your 7 pack a day regimen would probably take at least 20 years but I bet heroin could do the job in 3.

>>36132963
Why do you want cancer?

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>>36133877
I'd rather my family thinks I died of "natural" causes

>>36133899
Cancer is the worst way to die, just so you know

why don't you just get into a car crash?

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>>36133899
why not enjoy the beautiful time you have on earth instead ?

>>36132963
As someone with actual cancer, why don't you take my kidney with a tumor and give me your healthy kidney.

>>36132963
Why don't yougo for aids instead?
it would be more fun

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>>36133971
I would love to do that no joke. I always wished I had the power to consume peoples cancer and inherit their pain.

>>36134130
>implying people would sleep with me

LOL

>>36132963
Rub down yor balls with untreated mineral oil and take a shot of the stuff daily.
Be aware that the cancer you'll get will kill you slowly and horribly painfully.
The upside is that you'll remember the pre cancer life fondly and make you swear you'll enjoy every second of it should you survive. The downside is you won't survive and you'll die in agony.

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>>36135186
Sounds like a good deal

>>36133918
At least people can empathize with cancer. Unless it's literally their job (or they love you) people don't sympathize/empathize with mental illness.