>mom found the cum shoe

Why don't you just jerk off in the shower or into a tissue or something? Just tell her you spilled food on it or something.

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>dad found the jizz sock

I'm gonna kms dude what do I do

>He doesn't let his cum get all over his body
>He dries himself afterwards
>Not letting the cum dry to surround yourself with the glorius smell of musk 24/7

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>>36014770

Just jerk off onto yourself and then clean it up with the towel that you showered with that day, since it'll still be damp. I hang mine up and reuse it for cum for the next week, while I then pick a different towel for showering.
Fuck tissues.

>great uncle charlie found the prolapsing machine

dude I never clean up

my cummies just reabsorb into my peen or something

>Uncle Jack found the boston cream seminal doughnut

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>>36014844
I cum twice every day so the jizz is far too thin and murky for me to ever bother cleaning up.

>>36014770
>cum shoe
>cleaning up

I just fap and ejaculate all over myself, then pull up my boxers, even if it gets on my hands, then just go back to posting.

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>mum found the fuck boot

How fucked am I lads?

> cousin Vinnie found my hello kitty spunk depository

>Captain crunch found the cock cream

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>parents found the cartoon girl folder

>>36015368
Not as fucked as the boot

>Billy Batts found the shinebox

>2nd cousin rita found the anime mine

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>Uncle nathaniel the third found the dick sweat evaporation aparatus

>sister found tthe finger box

>parents figured out my computers password

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>>36014770
Tfw you have a foreskin so you don't need to be a degenerate and jerk off into socks and shoes
Feels good, thank you mom and dad from saving me from the jew

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>mom found the poop corner

>>36014770
>cousin found the no-no hole

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>aunt Sasha found the fart jar

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>>36017435
you're totally fucked now dude, best admit to them that you're gay before they find that thai lady boy folder

>>36018575
>>36017469
>>36017302
>>36015338
>>36014893
>>36014844
>>36014826
>>36014825
>>36014788
>Newfags found their first lewd object thread

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>>36017336
orignaldobaldo

>>36014808

true story. my dog found my jizz covered wash cloth and my mom used it to play tug of war with him right in front of me.

>what's wrong son? you look nervous.