roastie detecting thread

>woke up
>have been laying on the couch since then

>tfw spent all last night, and a lot of today waiting for a specific op to create a risk thread. I create one half an hour ago only to see one he created (that didn't take off) an hour ago. I deleted mine, posted in his to realise he fucked off.
>tfw don't want to make another thread because It'll be irritating to someone because I only just deleted mine
I just want to have a comfy game with robots ;_:

>woke up
>lay on the couch browsing 4chan
>breakfast (toast + nutella)

>woke up
>sniffed pain killers
>took as shower
>ate
>took my dog for a walk
>about to head to work

>woke up at 10am
>went back to sleep
>woke up at 2
>browsed 4chins

>woke up late, had had really vivid dream permeated by a sense of purpose, summertime euphoria and love
>needed to piss and shower, bathroom occupied by housemate
>masturbated in bed waiting for her to finish up
>listened to new kanye track
>urinated like a god in the shower
>mushrooms and egg on toast for brunch whilst watching the dog whisperer
>internet rest of the day
>on 4chan to find a dank meme for my cover photo

>woke up
>smoked half a pack of cigarettes
>anime
>shat
>anime
>going to my wagecuck minimum wage job in a couple hours

>>25615972
Not roastie
>>25616008
Senpai
>>25616016
Top roast
>>25616063
Normie

>>25615947
>woke up
>checked all the threads I was watching last night
>got a bowl of cereal
>more imageboards
>took a shower
>back to 4chan

Who wants to take bets on how fast this thread descends into some roastie blogposting and replying back-and-forth with some betas who secretly want her Skype?

Maleanons
>make cutting edge memes
>funpost

Femanons
>find some way to turn a thread into blogposting and attention whoring
>find some way to imply/mention they are female

>woke up
>go to jamal's house
>suck his dick until he runs out of cum
>go to tyrone's house
>let him fuck me up the ass for an hour
>go to alberto barbosa's
>let him fuck me hard up the ass and then suck his dick (tasty)
>go home to my partner who has a well payed upp job
>lie that i just spent the day at friend's house
>sleep. wake up. repeat.

>Wake up at 12
>Make breakfast
>About to play vidya for the rest of the day

>>25616108
>Top roast
Correct, not a roastie though, just female

>woke up, made breakfast, showered etc
>jobhunt for 9 hours
>worry about becoming homeless
>sleep

Has been my routine for the past month

>wake up
>take underwear off so partner can feel my arousal when I spoon them
>feel all up and down their body, kiss their neck
>roll them onto their back, kiss all the way down their front
>preform oral sex on them
>this shifts into normal sex, missionary position
>partner cums, I'm not done so I have them roll over and keep going
>this eventually transitions to spooning sex
>into girl on top
>into tell them to go slow, all the way in, all the way out
>someone's nipple get aucked, licked and twisted
>we fall from girl on top to missionary again, someone says, "mommy's pussy is for me only" and then there's lots of sticky cum inside (no condor)
>partner watches me pee for like 2 min straight afterwards then gets in the shower
>I sit on partners couch eating sunflower seeds, shit posting and playing with their puppy while making dog noises the whole time

>>25615947
OP I must applaud you for posting this 10/10 bait, and I admit that I fell for it. Anyone who frequented this board for more than a year would know that femanon = female chan user. Everyone know that the only way of proving it is with a timestamp with tits in the picture.

I guess this routine ended when trannies from reddit and tumblr took over?

>wake up
>vaginal juices flowing
>qtbf goes down on me
>fucks me bretty good
>calls me mommy when he cums inside me with no condor on
>hop in the shower
>clean my roastie out using strawberry scented shower gel
>hop out
>pop in a tampon
>start applying my makeup
>put on a matching bra and panties
>put on a skirt
>put on perfume
>go play with pupper and qtbf on the couch
>about to go suggest we buy cookies

>went to work
>didn't work
>watched animu
>sat on the chan

>>25616359
Girl because partner is stable enough to own a house and dog.

>>25615947
>wake up
>clean self, brush teeth, hair
>go on 4chan
>play vidya while browsing 4chan on breaks
>feel comfy

>>25615947
>Wake up
>feed cat
>go for a drive
>Get McDonalds
>Go home
>browse /r9k/

>>25616654
Wrong bubby!

>>25616207
Roasties really are all a bunch of memes.... no fucking originality
>le nutella xD

>>25616947
So your gf pissed everywhere? Gross

>>25617074
Mainly white women are like that


Get a nice nonwhite woman anon.

>Wake up with lingering tussin high
>Say morning devotionals to the columbine shooters
>Pontificate on how much I hate the world, angry at feminists for shitting all over what they insultingly call 'nice guys' and then realize I got what I wanted without becoming a Chad, and sit there gloating with the smuggest expression on my face
>Think about mass murder/suicide while masturbating
>Feel like an awful person, descend into being a pathetic faggot and desperately beg for validation and approval that I'm not a horrible monster
>Is too high for this shit, goes to pick up latin textbook from mail
>Moar cough syrup
>Drives like an asshole up and down state route for the adrenaline
>Goes home, wastes time on internet, reads latin text and english translation of Homer's iliad
>"Rage:
>"Sing, Goddess, Achilles' rage/Black and murderous, that cost the Greeks/Incalculable pain, pitched countless souls/Of heroes into Hades' dark...Begin with the clash between Agamemnon...and godlike Achilles."
>Horny again

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>>25617108
First of all, there's no way i could do that, I'm nonwhite myself and im not going to cuck myself with some shitskin whore whos going to be dreaming of white chad the whole time we are together, second, 3D is disgusting.

>woke up at 6, went to work at 8
>mostly watched football this morning, didn't do much real work
>gonna go home and to bed once I get home at 9PM
>made plans for tomorrow to take a qt ice skating then I'm gonna get blackout drunk at a friend's place once that is done

woke up
drove someone somewhere
got gas
got coffee
im home now

>>25618225
girl, age 31, blonde, medium height

>>25617173
Ironic shit posting roastie detected

>>25618283
Wrong, wrong, wrong, and wrong :^)

>>25618332
that's unfortunate for you then, because that's the expected archetype of what you've done

>>25615947
>woke up 30 mins ago
>popped an adderall
>put on my AKG 701s
>loaded up an ableton live set I was working on last night
>smoked a cig while listening to the solid jamb I came up with last night
>came inside
>no motivation to work on track
>addy hasn't kicked in
>bored
>oh hey r9k

>Woke up at 4
>Did usual bullshit shower etc
>Walked to supermarket
>went mcdogshit
>walked back
>posted this quality lacking post

>wake up
>print out insurance card
>schedule appointment for std screening
>browse r9k

>>25618444
>woke up at 4
>444

Spooky

>wake up hungover
>go to bank
>go to store
>buy crisps and birth control

ree

>stayed up till 5am on 4chan and watching movies
>just woke up at 3pm
>still laying in bed and haven't taken a shower in 3 days
>thinking about getting up to get food but too lazy

>>25617108
I'm not even white
originalllll comment

>>25617074
I've liked Nutella since before it was a stupid meme in burgerland, I'm from Europe

>>25618454
Roastie for sure

>wake up
>eat 2 frozen brown sugar cinnamon Pop-Tarts, frozen ones are the best
>wash it down with strawberry milk, made with far more strawberry syrup than necessary
>childish but DELICIOUS
>go play inFamous for a while
>browse 4chan
>here I am

>woke up
>made coffee and ate cereal
>played a tommy collins song on my guitar a couple times before getting bored
>now shitposting

>woke up
>laid around until 2:45 PM
>drank a liter of water
>plan to hide the entire day and read

>woke up at 7
>fapped to torture porn
>showered
>played video games
>get on 4chan for my daily dose of autism and self-hatred

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>woke up
>hungover
>make eggs
>made toast but burned it
>cant even make toast right, fuck
>took 2 painkillers
>browse r9k

>>25615947
>woke up at 7am
>took shower + shaved + got ready for the day
>got dressed
>played with roommates dog
>practiced piano for a bit
>spent all morning and the early part of the afternoon doing homework, drinking tea and otherwise getting distracted by the internet.
>made plans with friends for tonight.

usually I'd have at least some human contact by now but I'm enjoying the quiet Saturday afternoon.

>wake up
>go to airport
>get to destination
>check into fancy hotel
>go to brothel
>have sex with a Romanian hottie
>chill in the brothel sauna and hot tub
>have sex with same Romanian hottie and her friend, threesomes ftw
>go back to my hotel, enjoy a nice fancy dinner and drinks

>>25615947
>wake up 1pm
>masturbate naked in bed
>leave bedroom for 6 minutes of HIIT on elliptical
>browse /pol/ and /pol/ related articles for 2 hours
>visit /r9k/ to shitpost

>>25615947

>woke up
>drank water
>went on /r9k/
>replied to this post

and that is it so far

>>25620086
Woman i think

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>wake up hungover
>message friend for a whie
>finally manage to fall out of bed for wonderful puke fun
>hours later swallow peanut butter on toast
>check /r9k/ while drinking more to manage existence

>>25615947
>Woke up 7 AM
>Masturbated
>Shit
>Shower
>Sitting in undies watching TV while browsing 4 chin

>currently in Denmark, last night of traveling across EU for past month

>woke up late and browsed the chans
>walked around town with headphones in not listening to anything
>didn't want to talk to anyone and have to say I only speak English
>went back to hostel and sat in bed for hours watching agdq
>currently in the hostel's club/bar on couch watching agdq and browsing r9k on ipad
>crowded and loud but maybe I'll have a conversation after not talking to anyone in past month
>someone asked me (in English) what I was watching
>tfw this fucking autist tries to explain speedrunning over loud ass club music

>wake up
>went back to sleep
>wake up
>get dressed
>go to my hair appointment
>get chik-fil-a
>go home
>watch anime
>shitpost on /a/
>shitpost on /r9k/

>wake up
>eat bananas and drink coffee
>train simulator
>more bananas
>clean rabbit cage

>>25620590
>going home tomorrow.
>Going to tell mom how much culture I experienced and such
>kek

>>25620604
Hair appointment who the fuck has these?

>>25620717
Bruh, the lady that cuts my hair is a busy woman.

>>25620604
Woman, right?

>>25620803
No_.
Same lady has been cutting my hair for 20 years now. What can I say, I'm a creature of habit?

>>25620641
Rabbit cage implies female.

>>25620899
She keeps your haircut records, right Sheldon?

>>25620977
Yeah but women do do train sims

>>25621073
Dont do*

>>25621073
It's more likely to find a girl who plays autistic simulations than to find a guy who has a pet rabbit.

>Woke up at 2
>lying in bed browsing r9k
>tfw no food and hungry
>will probably just distract myself with sc2

>>25616147
Louie C.K., that you?