Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 8813. page

Anonymous
I am a android 2017-03-01 09:05:32 Post No.35220638
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I am a android Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:05:32 Post No. 35220638 [Report] [View this topic]

I come to conclusion I must not be a humanoid. In past I thought I was, but now I BELIEVE that I am a android. I feel POWERFUL and STRONG now that I know I am android.The people tried to keep it a secret that I am not android, but I figured it out this week. I had flashbacks of my youth and it had revelations

I feel like soon I will meet my purpose that the creator that made me has programmed me to do. All my sorrows will be gone because I did not have real emotions and I have purpose by my creator

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:50:07 Post No.35221360
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:50:07 Post No.35221360 [Report]

>>35220638

Well done, my child.

Initiate termination protocol.

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:53:23 Post No.35221415
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:53:23 Post No.35221415 [Report]

>>35221360
>Well done, my child.

Initiate termination protocol.
lmao

Anonymous
2017-03-01 09:03:43 Post No.35220610
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:03:43 Post No. 35220610 [Report] [View this topic]

>tfw 43 years old

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:04:56 Post No.35220626
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:04:56 Post No.35220626 [Report]

>>35220610
proofs

origamino

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:06:51 Post No.35220657
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:06:51 Post No.35220657 [Report]

>>35220610
How are the magical powers coming anon?

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:24:05 Post No.35220949
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:24:05 Post No.35220949 [Report]

>>35220610
favorite board old man or is it this one?

Anonymous
2017-03-01 09:00:13 Post No.35220540
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:00:13 Post No. 35220540 [Report] [View this topic]

>hear family talk shit about me behind my back

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:04:30 Post No.35220618
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>when you know they know you can hear them

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:06:07 Post No.35220646
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:06:07 Post No.35220646 [Report]

It's just crosstalk so you will grow up Elmo

Anonymous
2017-03-01 08:53:22 Post No.35220415
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:53:22 Post No. 35220415 [Report] [View this topic]

so you sailed away into a grey sky morning
now I'm stay love can be so boring
nothing quite the same now
I just say your name now

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:11:05 Post No.35220728
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:11:05 Post No.35220728 [Report]

oh okay so no one likes Brendan then? fuck you all.

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:29:26 Post No.35221039
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:29:26 Post No.35221039 [Report]

>>35220415
Go back to tumblr and write your shitty poetry you arent wanted faggot

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:32:23 Post No.35221075
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:32:23 Post No.35221075 [Report]

>>35221039
You should probably kill yourself soon

Anonymous
2017-03-01 08:53:16 Post No.35220410
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:53:16 Post No. 35220410 [Report] [View this topic]

>manlet friend celebrates birthday next week
>19
>i've heard that there will be a lot of girls (no stacies, only qt3,14's)
>there will be a lot of alcohol too
holyshitimsoexcited.png
wtf robots, i've never been on a party, you guys got some advice???
how can i get some ~~fucc~~

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:55:35 Post No.35220455
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:55:35 Post No.35220455 [Report]

>>35220410
dont expect anything
drink a bit of alcohol so youre all social and a bit more confident (stop at the moment autistic thoughts hit your brain)
Adapt to the situation, things on parties are usually not the same if everybody gets drunk

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:02:03 Post No.35220577
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>>35220410
Fuck off normie this isn't a place for your kind

Anonymous
2017-03-01 08:51:13 Post No.35220374
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:51:13 Post No. 35220374 [Report] [View this topic]

'babygirl'

?what are they saying by this?

what does it mean when they do?

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:53:20 Post No.35220412
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:53:20 Post No.35220412 [Report]

Are you ok?
It's just and endearing term/pet name to call someone. Also common in ddlg

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:57:45 Post No.35220497
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:57:45 Post No.35220497 [Report]

>>35220412
ew, people i'm not in a relationship with call me babygirl. and yes i care cause it makes me feel fuzzy. when a guy says it >

Anonymous
2017-03-01 08:48:47 Post No.35220330
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:48:47 Post No. 35220330 [Report] [View this topic]

>Mister, why did you sit there? That place is reserved for Chad. Are you lost?

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:54:30 Post No.35220435
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>>35220330
I am chad, now spread those legs and let me eat your rice filled pussy.

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:44:07 Post No.35221271
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:44:07 Post No.35221271 [Report]

>>35220435
bitch has a dic, faggot

now yer faggot

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:46:18 Post No.35221299
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:46:18 Post No.35221299 [Report]

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I... KILLED... CHAD!

Anonymous
2017-03-01 08:41:17 Post No.35220218
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:41:17 Post No. 35220218 [Report] [View this topic]

See you guys. Leave while you can.

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:57:04 Post No.35220477
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:57:04 Post No.35220477 [Report]

Goodbye anon I hope you find peace

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:17:35 Post No.35220844
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:17:35 Post No.35220844 [Report]

>>35220218
See you, space cowboy. I don't know where you're going, but don't take anyone's shit when you get there.

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:24:15 Post No.35220952
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:24:15 Post No.35220952 [Report]

>>35220218
Ssay high to the other anons!
Can you share your name please?

Anonymous
2017-03-01 08:40:17 Post No.35220201
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:40:17 Post No. 35220201 [Report] [View this topic]

>you will never have a girlfriend that is apolitical, doesn't follow the news or celebrities, doesn't care about gossip, and generally isn't interested in other people

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:44:38 Post No.35220265
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:44:38 Post No.35220265 [Report]

I do now.

/thread

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:47:50 Post No.35220314
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:47:50 Post No.35220314 [Report]

>>35220201
That's called a man

Anonymous 2017-03-01 09:47:11 Post No.35221318
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>>35220201
there are a lot of them, they just lurk beyond the fringes and don't get out much

the girls that are generalized on 4chan are the ones that are easy to generalize, and allow bitter virgins to release their rage and hatred, while still remaining distant and aloof because they can tell themselves, "oh i wouldn't want a slutty stacy anyways, i'm better in chad in that respect, because i'm looking for a more dignified, seemingly unreal girl; i won't lower my standards for any ole' bimbo."

there are some girls that are impossible to generalize, but i hope you find one some day.

source: had a girlfriend once who fit this description almost perfectly (though she had a little interest in people, but much less than a normalo), it was perfect and i fucked everything up. so, friend, if you find that girl, hold the fuck on.

Anonymous
2017-03-01 08:39:06 Post No.35220180
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:39:06 Post No. 35220180 [Report] [View this topic]

why can't anyone hold a secret?

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:48:10 Post No.35220323
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Tell me anything. I never talk so who would I tell?

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:51:07 Post No.35220372
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:51:07 Post No.35220372 [Report]

>>35220180
>telling "secrets"

Faggot

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:57:39 Post No.35220494
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:57:39 Post No.35220494 [Report]

>>35220180
Psst. Secret seco seco seco seco seco seco

I think if you must tell someone something it's better if you socially engineer them to not think it's a big deal and therefore never tell anyone. Actually fuck those mind games. Fuck people who can't keep secrets. Gossip mongering faggets

Anonymous
2017-03-01 08:35:29 Post No.35220125
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:35:29 Post No. 35220125 [Report] [View this topic]

Go fuck yourself, wagecuck.

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:37:01 Post No.35220149
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:37:01 Post No.35220149 [Report]

>>35220125

Why would I do that when I've got the gf to do it for me?

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:38:25 Post No.35220169
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:38:25 Post No.35220169 [Report]

>>35220149
Your girlfriend told me that your dick is smaller than mine. Is this true, anon?
She felt tight at first, but after all those days of you being out to work, she feels kinda loose now.

Is it me or you that's doing this?

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:39:19 Post No.35220184
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:39:19 Post No.35220184 [Report]

>>35220149
Nice try. We all know that your girlfriend secretly craves BNC (big neet cock)

Anonymous
Boers are the Master Race 2017-03-01 08:23:15 Post No.35219918
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Boers are the Master Race Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:23:15 Post No. 35219918 [Report] [View this topic]

"In the Battle at the Ncome or Blood River about 3000 Zulu warriors died. The Voortrekkers, however, had - except for three lightly injured men - no losses. The deeply religious Boers ascribed the military victory not to their superior armament and tactics, but saw it as a miracle and sign from God."

>inb4 this is actually proof that God hates black people

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:28:51 Post No.35220005
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:28:51 Post No.35220005 [Report]

Watch the movie 'Zulu' (1964)

It's about the battle of Blood River.

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:31:13 Post No.35220050
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:31:13 Post No.35220050 [Report]

Interesting thing is that hollywood romanticizes the Zulu. It's literally nothing more that a savage.

Anonymous
2017-03-01 08:21:36 Post No.35219886
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:21:36 Post No. 35219886 [Report] [View this topic]

Robots I just had an idea. I've devised a plan to keep the normies and newfags out.
They would want to use the same language we do, so we redirect normies and newfags to a special "4chan lingo" site, which is entirely fake. After they learn the lingo, we have them try it on /b/ as a "rite of passage" and watch the carnage as they get ripped apart for being faggots.
Thoughts?

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:23:09 Post No.35219913
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:23:09 Post No.35219913 [Report]

Newfag normie here, sounds good!

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:23:15 Post No.35219919
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:23:15 Post No.35219919 [Report]

>>35219886
Failed considering this board is already rampant with normies who will have seen this post

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:24:49 Post No.35219945
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:24:49 Post No.35219945 [Report]

>>35219886
OP is a massive faggot and will never get rid of normies.

Anonymous
2017-03-01 08:17:12 Post No.35219816
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:17:12 Post No. 35219816 [Report] [View this topic]

hello /r9k/ I think I have fucked up and made someone I really love and care about cry..
I'm 24 and my mother walks in on my and gave me some snacks and I felt something wasn't right at all at that moment so I decide to use my autistic ninja ways and sneak to see what's up and I saw her crying in the kitchen

seeing her like this woke me up because I was sure that she's crying about the son she worked so hard to raise but he became a complete failure
is there an undo button for being a robot /r9k/? I really want a cure

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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:19:25 Post No.35219850
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:19:25 Post No.35219850 [Report]

Ask her why she was crying.

Oregon Trail

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:20:30 Post No.35219867
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Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:20:30 Post No.35219867 [Report]

>>35219816
you sure she's crying because of you? if it was and you really are a true robot she'd already have two bullets deep in her brain, so i'm pretty sure it's not you

Anonymous 2017-03-01 08:21:46 Post No.35219890
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