> What? Of course I work hard! I have to look and feel good every day!
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>>35296062
Kek i know that beach
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>>35296062
I don't understand this thread. Why would I be at the beach? What did I ask her? How am I even talking to her?
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>>35296062
>bulimic whore who needs a non-fatty body to feel worthy
Kys.
>TFW you get banned from Omegle
TFW you just want to talk to other people and now you can't.
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lmao, I bet you're one of the blackboxes that waits for the other person to talk. L8R NERD
>>
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you can reset your IP or clear cookies
Anonymous
How do you hire an escort 2017-03-05 03:45:11 Post No.35296000
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How do you hire an escort 2017-03-05 03:45:11 Post No.35296000
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How do you hire an escort
Anonymous
2017-03-05 03:45:11
Post No. 35296000
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I'm giving into it. I don't know how to get one though?
7 Posts / 2 Images
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eccie.net
backpage.com (have to use the "dating" tab since their escort page got shut down)
do your research and be safe, lots of scams out there
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I thought about it, was gonna go on backpage and get myself a busty blonde.
Then I realized an average escort costs like 160 bucks an hour and i definitely can't afford it
Eventually resorted masturbating to shitty porn
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>>35296182
the escort page is still there, i just checked
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>20 years old
>Guys still call me bud
FUCKING STOP
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>>35295960
you seem pretty angry there bud
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>>35295960
something wrong, sport?
Don't let 'em bring you down champ!
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>3 years old
>people still call me puppy
BARK
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Before some of you guys tell me don't do it and dont be selfish, I'd like to say that I have made up my mind. Nothing you guys say can change it.
Now, I want to know what is the quickest and most painless method to commit suicide.
It also has to be easy to do.
I would really appreciate real answers.
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>>35295902
every method involves pain but you should disregard it considering death always, 99% of the time involves pain and is inevitable
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>>35295902
Why do you want to kill yourself pal
Natures just going to do it for you in ~50 years
Take on life and be yourself
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>>35295902
Tied my first hangmans noose today! Tried to choke myself out on it and I can definitely say with confidence I would
pass out quite quickly if I were to hang from height once I decide to go through with it. Fast, cheap, no clean up and instant sleep. Good luck op.
Anonymous
i hate my fucking parents 2017-03-05 03:40:29 Post No.35295899
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i hate my fucking parents 2017-03-05 03:40:29 Post No.35295899
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i hate my fucking parents
Anonymous
2017-03-05 03:40:29
Post No. 35295899
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anons.. what do i do?
my mom is a slut and my dad is a player and im frustrated.
>my parents tried to get married while my dad was already married before i was born
>dad divorced his wife
>married my mom
>had me
>divorced
>dad went back to previous wife
fast forward 20+ years
>dads wife dies
>kek
now my dad is at my house and he wont fucking leave
and my mom is throwing her stinky pussy at him
i hate my parents but i cant shake this terrible feeling /r9k/ wot do
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>Get job
>Move out
I'll send you my bill for this advice, OP
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>>35295911
it cant happen for now at least
i need a home remedy
>>
pics of op mom?
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When did you learn that the sexual subjugation of men by women is inevitable?
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>>35295886
when did you learn that video games
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>>35295943
why haven't you tried making the
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>>35295886
>sexual subjugation
Do you mean of white, indian and undersirable white nights.
Me my nignogs, muzzies and anglos are going to form a truce and go raping the fertile and purging the herbivore males.
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Post ideas you've acquired from others or came to by yourself that seem incontrovertibly true.
For me it's the idea that life is like occurrences such as tornadoes and thunderstorms in the sense that these events are the product of requite physical conditions.
despite my disbelief in free will it seems amazing to me.
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Penis' once served the same evolutionary function as an elephant's trunk.
I mean, if you think about it, how could it not be true?
>>
buperini burperini
>>
You don't need a reason to fight.
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It's been time robots, but I have to leave this board, and the whole of 4chan together. It's too addicting, and /r9k/ sucks me deeper into robothood than I actually am. I'm only 25, i'm gonna try running for that last bus and atleast fake myself to normiehood. It's too painful not to try. Goodbye my robot friends.
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Whats your plan?
Gonna fuck some sheep?
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>>35295821
good luck anon, hopefully I'll see you on the other side when we're both normies
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was hurley a robot?
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yes he was a neet addicted to tendies who couldnt get laid.
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>>35295735
>was hurley a robot?
hell yeah
he probably would have browsed /r9k/ even
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>>35295735
no
hurley was too nice to be a true robot
he was a gentle soul, a gondola really
Anonymous (OP)
Crazy Greentext Story 2017-03-05 03:27:50 Post No.35295650
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Crazy Greentext Story 2017-03-05 03:27:50 Post No.35295650
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Crazy Greentext Story
Anonymous (OP)
2017-03-05 03:27:50
Post No. 35295650
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Some crazy shit happened recently, thought I would share it. This might be a long one so get ready. It all started at my parents house, about to leave.
>be me
>16, D student, 7.5/10
>lead singer in a band, not important
>cunt english teacher, hates me, I hate her. lets call her Mrs. H.
>ask me to babysit her house while she was away for the weekend
>whatthefuck.png
>i begrudgingly accept because im failing her class and i need the credits
>fuckokayfine.jpg
At my house
>mrs. H stops by to give me the keys to her house.
>acts super fake in front of rents but shes actually a succubus
>suddenly smell something good
>my mom just finished baking a pie
>knew it was going to be served for dessert if i didn't eat it soon
>decide to sneak it with me because im autistic like that
At teacher's house
>pie is still hot, her house was a short drive away
>booked it there before anyone noticed I took the pie
>realize she will be serving dinner soon, must dispose of the evidence
>begin devouring it with my bare hands, only minor burns on my tongue
>mfw its worth it
>tastes so good
>feelsgreatman.png
>pie crust is super dry
>raid fridge and find 2 liter of mountain dew
>fuckyes.me
>chug half of the bottle like the skinny lard tard i am before my bladder begins to swell like the Ganges
>i rush to the bathroom, bring pie with to keep it safe
(cont.)
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>>35295650
>bathroom reeks of old lady perfume, whatever
>emptythefloodgates.exe
>i flush and go back to my pie
>the water doesn't stop rising
>ohfuckohfuckohfuck
>no plunger in sight
>old fashioned toilet with only one hole for water to flush from
>normally i would blame my brother, but mrs. H would blame me for the toilet overflowing if i was 30 states away
>idea
>jam my foot in there to stop in from flowing
>success
>suddenly my phone rings, knew it was my mom asking where her pie went
>fucking bitch little sister made my ringtone to a bunch of cats meowing
>that's when i hear the dog
>vicious rottweiler, some scary name like Tiberian or some shit
>dog starts flipping shit and i hear him charging the closed door
>bashes into the door over and over
>totally shitting bricks
>he would happily eat anything, including the pie and probably myself
So my foot's totally stuck in there right, I'm freaking out, the dog's having a seizure and I still have half a pie left.
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>>35295650
>shit happened recently
>16
underage b8
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>>35295650
>Some crazy shit happened recently,
>be me 16
Reported and didn't read
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Is this true?
Oregano is a nice spice.
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>>35295632
She told me she was saving herself for marriage
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>>35295632
No, and I BLACKED your oneitis.
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>Every single person on earth is the result of a sexual bond
>AT LEAST 3.62 billion coituses have been formed
>you weren't involved in a single goddamn one of them
It's so fucking surreal to know that nearly every person you pass on the street has done it at least once. I swear it's like they live in a completely different world.
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I've had sex and it was great
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>>35295686
Fuck you m8 originalio caracoli
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>>35295686
no you haven't utsmebVSAD
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>Mfw my friend slept with a girl who's in a wheelchair
Would you bang a handicapped chick?
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>>35295544
Why not OP?
If a 10/10 qt offered a ride in her wheelchair
Would you not go?
>>
At this point it doesn't matter, I'd do it because handicap girls are sometimes cute.
>>
i slept with a friend's paraplegic sister ...as in slept
she asked if i wanted to have sex
i was like "only if you actually wanna"
to which she said not really
so we just cuddled, talked and fell asleep
i don't really interested in sex and she wasn't gonna get anything out of it so there was no point really
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Why are all the hottest girls dick girls?!
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>>35295522
Because men are the leading experts in what men like.
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>>35295522
That's just how it do b
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>>35295545
>tfw a man has everything I've ever wanted
>too proud to turn gay