I can't find a guy who can keep an erection to me
Dating is so fucking hard. I quit
>>35469084
>I can't find a guy who can keep an erection to me
How many times have you tried? Are you willing to try one more time? I have the best dick ever
>>35469084
Have you tried a BBC?
Have you tried not being fat an ugly?
Or not being a man pretending to be a woman
Or eating snow, eating snow helps a lot
I honestly, really like girls. I have been in love with two. I fap to girls, they turn me on, I wish I could have sex. But, aside from girls, I also liked a guy at school. He was very beautiful, tall, had blue eyes and dark hair. I thought to myself, If he kissed me, I wouldn't mind. Or hug me or cuddle. But I didn't want anything sexual, like to suck his dick or him sucking my dick. Especially not anything to do with gay fucking, I find anal disgusting.
So what the fuck was that? To this day, I don't understand. I tried watching gay porn. It does nothing for me. I haven't been attracted to any men since. Just that one guy. Would I go full gay for him? No. But, if he really wanted it, I guess we could jerk each other off.
My god, while remembering those feelings and typing this I just realized I'm definitely not 100% straight. But I don't feel gay or bisexual either, it's way more complicated. What is this?
>>35469042
no worries anon
I sucked 5 dicks before I realized that i'm straight
>>35469042
you mind was trying to hint that you should give up on women cause even it knows you arent getting any
>>35469054
But I don't want to suck dicks!
Or get fucked in the ass.
I just wanted to kiss him, hug him, cuddle with him. I just don't know anymore.
Faggotry relapse.
For the past few years I've become an antithesis of my former shameful self. Become the type to loudly talk about my hatred of anime and show a clear prioritization of bitches and drugs.
Just downloaded the Yu-Gi-Oh! iOS games.
>>35469007
The original card decks are where it's at tbhh
>>35469007
That's what happens when you try to be someone you're not. JuS beE urSeLf ;D
This game is garbage, you can only have 3 monsters or traps on the field and not all of the original cards are in the game.
Plus most of the original cards suck dick and are boring beat sticks
>Little Shlomo slowly tries to make his way to his computer.
>His extreme physical weight makes it much harder for him to navigate properly across the room's floor, littered with empty Mt. Dew bottles and all kinds of various dragon dildos. >He seats in his dirty and run-down chair, which groans at the shock of his 200, extremely heavy pounds bearing down on it, and presses the start button on his outdated computer.
>As his computer boots up with a humming sound, Shlomo picks up a dossier from the trash-littered floor and examines it.
>It's his trusty old manual made by the JIDF, containing various instructions for debate with anti-Zionists in online forums.
part 1
>>35469004
>He proceeds to open the dossier with his fat, and very smelly hands.
>One of Shlomo's fat arms accidently knocks down one of his countless empty Vaseline tubes, and underneath exposes an old picture which he had long forgotten.
>Shlomo was utterly surprised to see it was still there. "Oh Miranda, you dirty Gentile shitze, why wouldn't you love me?" Shlomo whimpers under his heavy breath.
>Suddenly, all of his repressed and painful memories back from high school return to Shlomo.
part 2 and more on the way
>>35469023
>Being rejected by his love, her filthy goyim friends laughing at him, him starting to cry and running off like so many times before.
>To this day he remains a bitter and hate-filled virgin. He always blamed the Gentiles for his own failures.
>"I don't need this stupid shitze anyway, or any inferior white Gentile cattle girl for that matter," Shlomo bitterly mumbles, filled with his own impotent anger, and proceeds to throw the picture of Miranda into the trash, which is already filled to the brim with used Kleenex tissue papers.
part 3 and nearly done
>>35469047
>Finally logging into his computer, Shlomo is greeted by his home wallpaper, consisting of a huge black cock.
>After discovering the Internet, he soon found an outlet for his repressed sexuality, by fapping to cuckold porn. He wanted to approach Tyrone about his feelings, just so he could lose his virginity before he turned 25.
>Still, Shlomo had not found the courage to talk to Tyrone, or anyone except for his mother after he finished high school, for that matter. "I always just wanted to suck your black dick, Tyrone," he sighed.
part 4, almost done
Who here is 100% suicidal? if so then im giving you the opportunity to potentially go down in history. I need a volunteer to be my lab rat for a scientific project i have set up. Worst case scenario, you get shredded at the molecular level. Best case scenario, you became famous throughout history. Who is in?
Let's do this Mr Washington
>>35468988
>Worst case scenario, you get shredded at the molecular level
Sounds painful
where do i sign?
SUCCUBUS PUSSY HERE I COME.
Hey, Nonny! How was your week?
>>35468938
what the fuck is a nonny you massive cunt
>>35468938
how do sweaty soles feel on your face?
>>35468938
Emily Jean falls in love with BBC.
Unable to confess, the genderfluid version of Emma Stone is gifted by a deus ex machina with the melanin-enriched man's home address. Never minding the strange zip code, she immediately goes to him, and is overjoyed to find out that he is going to crush her with his BBC as well.
He went silent for what seemed like forever, so she asked him, "What's the matter?" He said, "You're gonna get BLACKED, Emma," but then his disgusting fat nigger cock got really hard, which made her take off her clothes. She expected him to scream, "Get over here and rub my cock with your feet, whore," as she kissed him and stroked his smelly nigger dick dripping of precum, and he shouted, "I'm gonna breed that tight little ass with my superior black seed!" which made her small pussy twitch and throb.
Before she knew it, she was blowing him for the first time till he came. He shot straight down her throat as she gagged and suffocated for some air. Her green bright eyes looking up at his face as he smirked and grinned. His smelly dick was filling her taste buds with the foul odor, but she was slowly falling in love with the stench. His cum was so thick, it got stuck inside her throat no matter how hard she swallowed.
He then said, "I want to stretch the dyke in her little white ass now!" and seeing that they'd already gone that far and they were both naked, she obliged. A few hours later, the guy bred all her holes with his nigger seed. He berried his dick so deep into her that when he pulled it out, he said, "WE WUZ KANGZ, bitch!"
She fell in love with the scenario as part of her wished she can give birth to his nigger child. He looked so cute when he picked her up and sat her on his sweaty lap, so she reassured while wiping his cum off her face, "I am your servant now." While the two go at it like rabbits, DRAMA ensues as they begin to fall in love with each other instead and question the NATURE of CROSSBREEDING.
Nothing makes sense.
How can something exist? When did it start?
For those who believe in God, let's say god created the universe. Then we go on and on with who created god etc... leading us nowhere.
The Big bang suffers the same fate, where did that initial bubble come from etc.., even as an atheist it doesn't make sense.
No religion makes sense, they're all full of holes and dogmatic. Being completely skeptical of everything is tiring, but I also can't believe anything for sure except the fact that I exist.
Existence is weird.
Life is what you do while you're waiting to die
>>35468905
Quantum physics makes sense.
>>35468905
>How can something exist? When did it start?
Imagine nothing existing, and it becomes self-evident that it's impossible for there to be a state of no consciousness. Hence, reality is by necessity consciousness.
We are all a single consciousness, and it didn't begin in a period in time, since time is something created within it, and there is nothing outside of this mind that is creating it. This single mind that we are all a part of is the only true "substance".
Don't believe me? Look into the literature on NDEs, try Ayahuasca and see for yourself.
For instance:
http://anti-matters.org/articles/8/public/8-8-1-PB.pdf
and
http://www.horizonresearch.org/Uploads/Journal_Resuscitation__2_.pdf
and
http://www.allaboutchristian.com/spirituality/index.html
Or to put it more bluntly,
"As my soul left my body, I found myself floating in a swirling ocean of multi-colored light. At the end, I could see and feel an even brighter light pulling me toward it, and as it shined on me, I felt indescribable happiness. I remembered everything about eternity - knowing, that we had always existed, and that all of us are family. Then old friends and loved ones surrounded me, and I knew without a doubt I was home, and that I was so loved." - Christian Andreason
http://www.broadjam.com/artists/songs.php?artistID=14702&mediaID=460764
You now have your answers. Enjoy.
>friend makes me buy a game on steam to play it with them
>removes me from his friends list the day he said we would play
>>35468892
>friend
why do you feel the need to form connections with others? when you can create the ideal friend?
What an asshole.
Which game was it, anon?
>>35468892
What do you mean friends on steam.
is there a way to make my iphone my webcam for the computer?
>>35468836
Firstly. No
Secondly >>>/g/
there is multiple ways
i hope you're all doing good today
>>35468814
I miss the early 00s that pic sums it up
Pretty good. You trying to rockout?!
>>35468814
I know that kid
>Pops 50mg of oxycodone
>Obtains a mild, body-orientated buzz, as if I were to take a low/moderate dose of codeine without a tolerance.
How fucked am I, r9k?
Is it time to hit the methadone yet clinic or..
>Fent
Yeah, no. If you've gone that far, you seriously need help now.
>>35468813
Nah bud when you can't afford prescriptions
and start doing heroin then you might wanna seek help which will be soon.
>>35468838
My question was strictly related to oxycodone. My source got taken off fentanyl and put onto OC's instead, which I prefer. Fent is extremely sketchy, fell asleep way too many times with a patch in my mouth. Quite lucky to have woken up at all.
rate my wannabe-chad cousin
>>35468795
thad/chad
he's certainly trying, but that's about all that can be said...
>>35468795
looks like a faggot desu
>>35468795
I would face fuck him.
>virgin shaming threads appear n /r9k/ on a daily basis
>one of them is about to hit 200 answers
why do you do this you sick sadistic fucks
>>35468774
Which thread is that? I probably have it hidden.
>>35468774
there is literally nothing wrong with virgin shaming
>>35468798
>>35466647
this shit right here desu oregano
>tfw you really fall for a guy
>he's super sweet and cute and patient and finds you cute
>he lives in another country
>he starts talking to you about somebody way cuter and better than you that lives nearby to him
i-it's ok i wanted him to be happy!why do I feel so sad then
>>35468761
I'll replace him. Are you a boy or girl though.
>>35468792
why does that matter, it doesn't make it any less depressing.
why do all the people that I really care for and care for me always live so far away
>>35468761
>tfw talking to a qt guy who lives in another country as well
>tfw terrified this is going to happen
it's going to be daijoubu anon
>Little Shlomo slowly tries to make his way to his computer. His extreme physical weight makes it much harder for him to navigate properly across the room's floor, littered with empty Mt. Dew bottles and all kinds of various dragon dildos. He seats in his dirty and run-down chair, which groans at the shock of his 200, extremely heavy pounds bearing down on it, and presses the start button on his outdated computer. As his computer boots up with a humming sound, Shlomo picks up a dossier from the trash-littered floor and examines it. It's his trusty old manual made by the JIDF, containing various instructions for debate with anti-Zionists in online forums. He proceeds to open the dossier with his fat, and very smelly hands. One of Shlomo's fat arms accidently knocks down one of his countless empty Vaseline tubes, and underneath exposes an old picture which he had long forgotten. Shlomo was utterly surprised to see it was still there. "Oh Miranda, you dirty Gentile shitze, why wouldn't you love me?" Shlomo whimpers under his heavy breath. Suddenly, all of his repressed and painful memories back from high school return to Shlomo. Being rejected by his love, her filthy goyim friends laughing at him, him starting to cry and running off like so many times before. To this day he remains a bitter and hate-filled virgin.
>>35468756
>He always blamed the Gentiles for his own failures. "I don't need this stupid shitze anyway, or any inferior white Gentile cattle girl for that matter," Shlomo bitterly mumbles, filled with his own impotent anger, and proceeds to throw the picture of Miranda into the trash, which is already filled to the brim with used Kleenex tissue papers. Finally logging into his computer, Shlomo is greeted by his home wallpaper, consisting of a huge black cock. After discovering the Internet, he soon found an outlet for his repressed sexuality, by fapping to cuckold porn. He wanted to approach Tyrone about his feelings, just so he could lose his virginity before he turned 25. Still, Shlomo had not found the courage to talk to Tyrone, or anyone except for his mother after he finished high school, for that matter. "I always just wanted to suck your black dick, Tyrone," he sighed.
>>35468790
>Shlomo opens up his outdated Internet Explorer, and searches on Bing for 4chan's "Politically Incorrect" sub-board. Suddenly, he remembers his mother's words. She always told him to get a job in real estate, or become a lawyer like his father, Moshe Davidsteingolemwitz. "Please get a real job, Shlomo. I'm begging you," she would say. But she just doesn't understand. She doesn't understand how utterly important it is to protect the chosen nation of Israel from these scumbag Stormfags and Arab-Palestinians on the Internet, whose ultimate goal it is to wipe him off the map.