Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 8279. page

I want to impregnate those tits

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I bet this turns you on Wang

>>35469836
Stop being lanklets that I could crush under my foot.

t. Asian grille

get you some ape escape my nigga

but get some better games, all of these are kiddie shit

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Legend of the gobbos is my fucking jam. Play that first.

>>35469798
A bug's life. Man that movies message was great. Normies vs robots

>>35469794

How to get women

>Be confident
>Be average/above average looking
>Don't be fat
>Don't dress like an autist

Pretty hard to do when you constantly feel inadequate.

>>35469794
>i'm tall but not attracctive
>got gf but no friends

I guess it checks out.

>>35469794
Lel. Looks and shit dont matter if you are a turbo autist.
t. Fag who gets hit on and girls bail out half a minute later when they realise im boring af

>tfw have an atheistic mindset
>can appreciate church but none of it clicks for me
>will never meet a wholesome traditional Christian wife at mass who is a total fucking freak in bed

why do you do this god?

>gf

She's a church girl. She won't have sex with you. She will lead you on and all you will get is blue balls.

>>35470864
That's a plus to me since she is still a virgin. I'm planning to marry me after a year or so.

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>>35469776
Kek'd. Could use some more of these because feeling kinda shitty

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>>35469875
greentext stories have become pretty rare
>FeelsBad.jpg

>>35469776
>.oiloncanvas
>.wallpainting

Kek

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Option 1: Accept it and move on
Option 2: Accept it and pursue her regardless

>>35469775
One of my friends had a crush, and his best friend knocked her up after asking for her phone number from my friend. They aren't friends anymore, and that friend of my friend doesn't have custody of his baby.

thanks for your responses my dudes

>>35469747
>open chatlog
>/spank

>>35469747
BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPP

orignalaliwneifiefe

Comply while sliding my cock in and out of her ass

>>35469725
>could instantly look like chad if i lost some weight
>tfw you look even worse when skinny.

>>35469725
Look into kratom. Makes you feel you're on heroin and you don't eat on it. It's also legal.

>everyone tells me I'm good looking
>a girl wanted me in school
>I'm morbidly obese now
>"maybe I should lose weight"
>remember 3.5 inch penis
>continue with the cake, biscuits and chocolate

Am I wrong to be depressed?

I'm 20 and I already have these urges. I feel like I shouldn't want this shit for another 5 or so years at least but it turns me on like nothing else.

Theres nothing wrong with it of course, the purpose of sex is procreation after all.

>>35469637
I'm 24 and it's my and my girlfriend's biggest mutual kink. That said she also wants to lactate so may be sooner than later.

you're kinda late, this site is crawling with kids and facebookers

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>torrent the latest tacs
>its an 'Ant is shilling another prostitute episode to get his noodle sucked' episode

he's not even hiding it at this point.

I used to listen to O&A, stopped when Ant got fired. Never bothered to listen to the show after that, or Ant's show.

>>35469593
Piracetam. Get the original. Don't use too much or you'll develop tolerance for it.

>>35469599
Got another recommendation for motivation?

>>35469593
Ethanol
Preferably in the form of a gin and seltzer

I'd probably murder them both honestly.

also they are blocking your path

something about OP pic, just seems right. natural.

leave some lemonade and small chocolates out for him on a tray tonight

Approach him and ask 'does the narwhal bacon at midnight?' If he tips his fedora and takes a huge drag from his e-cigarette then you know you've earned his respect.

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>what should I do

Stay inside.

>>35469509
I guess no on knows what "newspaper" is. :)

I'd say the next assassinator. Sorry I'm not sure if I spelled it right and I do not bother to dig up translator.

>>35469509
systemspace desu

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Don't you see, Jon? The cat has your pipe.
The cat HAS YOUR PIPE.

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>TFW You'll never have a fembot send you her panties to deeply inhale furiously beat to
JUST

>>35469525
Eww. That's sick af