>"Good morning, Anon! I snuck in and made breakfast! I'm so happy we're saving our virginity until we're married. Now get up, Bible study starts in 30 minutes!"
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I don't know who you are and this isn't my house. Omg did you drug me? Why am I tied to this chair? *begins screaming and woman injects something to make me pass out and puts duct tape over my mouth*
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>>35590370
Go back to memebase or whatev
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>>35590370
Lol guis I'm so funny rawr XD *rooeplays*
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>get coffee at coffeeshop
>instantly knock it over
time to never go there again and end my miserable life
god i cant even do anything right
fuck me so hard
why am i tortured to wait until the 1st of july
i hate my life so much
fuck
fuck me
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>>35590279
>actually goes outside
You aren't lost yet. You're just overthinking.
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That's actually a very funny situation. It's an obscure form of comedy. You know that helper pepe meme? That's basically you. Pic related
Although you are right, you can never go back to that coffee shop. Just go to a different one and try again. I had a similar experience with a burger place near my apartment, and I haven't gone back since
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>>35590279
Get a grip faggot.
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Why aren't you selling your boipussi for money and affection to older gentlemen?
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>selling
Nobody would even fuck my boipucci for free
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Why don't the older gentlemen buy each other's man pussies
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>>35590303
Because they want fresh, tight boipussi
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>be me
>constantly bragging about how i don't need a girl and they're a waste and they never truly love, etc etc
>going to bed yesterday
>have the fucking best dream i've had in a while
>me and a long time crush were at school
>we sat at the back of the class next to each other
>for some reason we're not paying attention and shes sort of leaning on my shoulder
>i'm colf af irl in my bed so the warmth shes giving me feels fucking euphoric (probably my head buried in my pillow)
>we're looking at funny pictures on my phone while i'm taking in the aroma of her hair
>finally, i'm thinking. finally she came around - i never thought girls would actually make me feel like this! especially this one
>the way my leg is touching my other leg while i'm sleeping is giving me the illusion of her warm thigh rubbing on my leg
>everything fees so nice
>i'm in a weird state of mind where i'm thinkin... Best sleep ever & Best dream ever
>we'll scrolling and giggling
>bell rings
>i feel cold again
>she's legit vanished from my classroom
>i knew it, girls are manipulative fag retards
>everyone elses voices suddenly get louder
>the classroom feels colder
>i feel empty
>mfw i wake up
I've been wondering. Do i truly need them? If need be i will NEVER find love because of how much i hate the female race.
They're such egotistical fucking losers. But they're so pretty & i'm hardwired to like them.
This dream is a representation of how fast good things with girls can turn. They lie, they get bored, they cheat. They're the inferior race.
No woman deserves love. No woman will love you. It's 2017 wake the fuck up.
I don't know... anyone else ever get a taste of something in a dream that they swore they'd never seek irl
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>>35590224
There are some good girls out there, don't buy COMPLETELY into le roastie meme. Still buy into tho, just not COMPLETELY.
If ur not attractive tho u probably don't have a chance even with a good one
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>>35590224
>uses a dream he had as an example of why girls will always leave you
Wew
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>>35590254
I'm a part-time male model for lesser thought of clothing companies like Walmart for example.
Being a 10 is sometimes worse than being a 6. TRUST ME.
They're so terrified of me. I'm literally an 11/10 model who's a kissless virgin because i'll NEVER touch a girl who's consumed alcohol, who's said something cringy, who's a retard, who doesn't have nice skin, and much more.
In a sense i'll never touch a girl & they're too fucking much of cowards to even come close to me because i'm "too cute"
Anonymous
new trend among rosties 2017-03-17 02:34:22 Post No.35590220
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new trend among rosties 2017-03-17 02:34:22 Post No.35590220
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why are most roasties wearing this now
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>>35590220
Because they're whoresorignal post
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Blah blah blah
Spam thread
Black belt in sucking dicks
Argument over fashion trends
Argument over women
Here's what you wanted, now fuck off
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>>35590262
Dude why are you being mean to me
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what do you lads think bout this?
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>>35590213
I respect her courage and drive to find intimacy but hope she never reproduces.
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>>35590213
It's a trap designed to catch fedora wearing cucklords who want to be princes on white horses and save the poor lady in distress. Meet up somewhere private and dominate the faggot.
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>>35590213
That's a fucking guy.
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post yfw you realise this is almost 100% accurate
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>implying being hot means you reproduce
If anything ugly people tend to reproduce more, even if hot girls can get fucked easily.
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I need the proofs of the 80/20 shit
>inb4 that one Tinder study
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Right graph is literally the entire civilised world before feminism. If you take away women's rights to claim jobs they aren't qualified to do and make them do the jobs they are most qualified for(being a caretaker), you will just get a perfect society. Marriage and christianity were all about that.
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Do you think your mommy had sex while she was pregnant with you?
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>>35590180
>tfw recognized the video instantly
I just want off this ride.
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I hope so. Imagining my mom being a slut is hot.
So is pregnancy sex.
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>>35590180
>>35590544
Coming from a guy with a prego wife. We still live out our bondage, Ballbusting, Cbt fantasies, sex wrestling and such while she is pregnant. Your attitude doesn't change unless your doc tells you not to have sex for some reason. Also pregnant orgasms are so much stronger.
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Friendly reminder that
>Summer is coming up
>Flying ants will come out
>Insanely hot during the day, frying your PC, and at night so you can't sleep comfortably
>You'll sweat in your clothes every time you go outside
>Loving couples everywhere
>Nothing happening, no sense of direction
>The brightness will highlight all your acne, scars, bad looks
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>>35590154
>Strayan' cunt thinks we all die from heatstroke and flying monsterbugs during summer
Funny mate, Here in the first world we don't have that shit.
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>>35590154
Maybe for you Americuck, summer's already finished here
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>>35590154
Friendly reminder that :
YOU- the self defeatist coward who is SO determined to make up excuses for his self-imposed failure, that he even MANAGES to pretend that the best time of year is responsible for his own inability to be a man...
The truth ?....
You look for distractive excuses because you don't want people to know you're afraid....
Afraid of rejection
So why don't you have the balls to either kill yourself RIGHT NOW or stfu
Because we, like your parents, are tired of you wasting our time...
Coward
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Mfw I'm a normie and get pussy on the reg but I still browse /r9k/ more than any other board
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>on the reg
i think i discovered what a trigger is
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>>35590116
I m a chad and I go here to laugh at pathetic people
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You look like a fucking loser and I know losers.
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>neighbor's daughter fell into the jizz jacuzzi
I can hear them calling lads
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>archeologists uncovered the cum codex
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>father abolished the the semen depository
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>little brother was sucked into multidimensional smegma vortex
>be me
>be middle eastern (Persian)
>only want middle eastern girls (Persian, Arab or paki) or light skinned/white girls.
>only people who like me are black.
What is it about me that only attracts black women I don't even understand. Why can't I get a girl that's my skin colour or lighter? Persian girls go for Persian guys, I'm Persian, but have had no luck.
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>>35590079
Black people are disgusting.
originally
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>>35590079
>tfw the only chick to ever ask me out was this overweight black chick
Rejected her obv, rather die than stick my penis in someone that is overweight.
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I think it is funny when Iranians are so embarrassed of being Iranian that they call themselves "Persians".
Persia doesn't exist anymore and there are no Persians anywhere on the planet.
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>that poster who autistically explains the human mating process
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>that poster who wants to tell the whole world how awesome his job is
calm down wagie
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>that poster that comes here to say how much they laugh at robots and how it makes them feel better
you can feel good, not post and no one gets hurtFUCK OFF NORMIE REEEEEEE
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>>35590911
I have a strong feeling that all of those are robots, just pretending to be Chad, because on the internet no one knows if you are Chad or not
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You just have to be confident, femanon!
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you're skin is shit tier, ciara
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>>35590022
Thanks op, you just solved all of my social problems. I don't know why I never thought of that! I'm going to go get a life and stop posting on the internet BYE
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i see there's an eliza trend going around the last couple hours
Anonymous
my robot boyfriend can't take care of himself 2017-03-17 02:14:38 Post No.35590016
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my robot boyfriend can't take care of himself 2017-03-17 02:14:38 Post No.35590016
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my robot boyfriend can't take care of himself
Anonymous
2017-03-17 02:14:38
Post No. 35590016
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> He was a robot at least 8 months ago, a euphoric 26KV who was shaking every time he spoke to me
> As such mummy takes care of him, from his clothes, to his phone bill
> I'm trying to overlook it, but I can't, not after he got berated by some officer two days ago who pulled him over and he had to confess he didn't know what info the officer wanted because he's 26 and lets his mom take care of literally everything
> the officer called him "one of those adult baby men" and laughed in his face
Look, I care about him, so breaking up isn't what I want, the only thing I was is an idea of how to approach this and make him see that he needs to learn how to take of himself for his own sake. NEETs and former NEETs how would you want someone to give you this message?
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>>35590016
You can not teach him to be a man. That was his dad's job. You're dating a man child. Either break out with him and leave him some time to grow up accept them for his flaws
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>>35590041
it shouldn't be about being a man, I just want him to do what adults do, go grocery shopping, write a check, know how to clean something until it's spotless. It's annoying how he's a smug atheist who thinks other believers are retarded but the only thing he can do is piss himself when talking to authority figures.
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>>35590016
I'll help you, anon. I was like this and thanks to a kind girl, who sadly passed away, I was "beaten" into shape.
First, you need to help him cut his dependency. To do that at this age, he needs to believe that what he can do, which others are now doing for him, he can do it better. Start with dishes and clothes. Make him think only he can wash the dishes he uses as clean as they should be. Make him think only he can use the washing machine and detergent + additives in the way that will make the clothes the cleanest. Same principle applies from then on.
One rookie mistake is to believe that separating the manchild from their caretakers is the key, but that is wrong. You need to convince the child, that their man can achieve things others can't for him, and that he shouldn't be scared to try and fail, because you'll be there for him and support him when he's down.