>B-but fat people can't get girlfriends!
Oh yeah? Well Jack Black is fat and he has a wife.
Explain that.
>The fat guy who the Jews controlling Hollywood selected to become rich and famous has a wife
>>35936134
>he has money
>women want money
boom
>>35936202
His personality levels are off the charts and he's not half bad looking. I'm sure he'd still find a slightly chub 3.14 even if he were a wageslave.
Reminder that Stacy also watches anime just like you.
>>35936118
Anime is a robot hob-
>>35936118
BUT DOES SHE FAP TO IT
NO?
SO REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
lol she isn''t even attractive
Hi, robots.
I'm lonely and wanted to talk with you, I've lived a very interesting 34 years so far and have some good stories to tell you.
First one will be about the time I took a gun to school.
Feel free to share your stories with me.
>1996
>Keep getting picked on in school
>Get fed up and steal dad's .22 revolver
>Gun class the next day my bullies surround me as I'm changing
>NOPE.JPEG
>Pull the gun and start shooting like a madman
>Everyone scrambles for the door, only three left in the locker room with me
>One looks dead but there's no blood, the other two are crying with wet pants
>One is my friend
>"Get up, anon...I'm executing this bully in the name of the law"
>JESUS CHRIST ANON WHAT ARE YOU DOING DONT KILL HIM
>The other one starts moving, he's not dead he just fainted
>Let my friend go, tell him to remember me and tell my story to the world
>Intercom comes on, "ANON THIS IS THE WEST VIRGINIA STATE POLICE, LET THE HOSTAGES GO AND WE WILL HELP YOU
>I shoot the intercom
>Half hour later a walkie talkie slides under the door
>"ANON MY NAME IS ROB AND I WANT TO NEGOTIATE WITH YOU
>Tell Rob I want a helicopter and a PlayStation one with resident evil because it was new then and I really wanted it
>He says OK, chopper is on the way just let them go
>Another hour goes by, I hear the faint sound of a chopper overhead
>Rob says, "ANON YOUR CHOPPER IS HERE WE HAVE YOUR VIDEOGAME JUST LET THEM GO
>Let them go and make a mad dash for the chopper
>Police beat my fucking ass before I even make it outside, SWAT teams everywhere
>Get hauled off to the courthouse
>They threaten to take me away forever
>Grandfather shows up, tells them they're not taking me anywhere and to charge me or let me go
>They can't figure out what to charge me with because I was only 14 and didn't actually hurt anyone
>They let me go
I was expelled from all school property in the country and had to pay the the intercom I shot but that's it.
That's my entire high school experience.
>>35936376
silly cunt.
Should of had a fake hostage inside man
>>35936466
I was only 14, I didn't know what the fuck I was doing.
Look, I don't support rape
But supposing that you had to convince a submissive beta guy into liking rape for life threatening reasons, how would go about that?
How do you trick him into enjoying being the rapist?
Like, I think most submissive guys are into femdom and things like that, but I need that guy to find rape arousing or I'll be in a lot of trouble.
Why are you asking, OP?
oranges
>>35936087
I would rather not talk about that. I just need your ideas.
Seriously, how do you think your going to die?
Hopefully of old age
Probably of a heart attack or cancer
aIl on my own
Suicide or cancer. Maybe homicide.
But definitely not from living a full life. :/
Who /highly functioning robot/ here?
>have a gf
>educated and employed
>have friends
>have fit body
>suffer from crippling anxiety weekly, sometimes daily
>nobody in my life knows how fucked I am inside
>this has been going on for years
I know you faggots lurk this board, it's about time we get respect in /r9k/, at least we are the robots who contribute something to society.
Everyone knows.
>>35935993
>no current gf, do tinder sluts count?
>college degree and have a good career
>friends
>fit
>crippling depression
my man
>>35935993
>crippling anxiety weekly, sometimes daily
>crippling anxiety
>crippling
and yet
>gf
>job
>friends
>fit
98% chance this is b8
>h-hey t-tyrone that's m-my girlfriend!!
>n-nvm, please d-dont break m-my other knee...
>>35935923
i'm pretty disappointed with google for making this
>>35935990
why? this is the usual for google
remember that NASA one? where it had all kinds of women and brown people on the science team, even though in reality 95% of the team was white males?
google: "fuck white males"
>>35936189
>google: "fuck white males"
what's supposed to happen? the first four results are /pol/ carl cuck memes for me
How do I know if I'm a virgin?
I'm a man btw.
If eber u put ur peepee in other person u isn't a virgin
>>35935720
is your hymen still intact?
the bongo girl
> go to shop to buy tendies
> see this
wat do?
>>35935681
mumble "roastie slut" and buy my tendies
Get whatever non-frozen stuff I need from the other end of the store until this exhibitionist is out of the way.
>>35935681
Rape her. I've already raped 12 women.
Ask a Chadlet anything. I am 5'5" 24 y/o and have had sex with 11 different girls. The number could be 5 times as much if I tried to get laid more.
I still consider myself a robot because of legit childhood diagnosed aspergers.
I'm 5'11 and I try to tell these tallfags the face matters way more than height, although 5'5 is pretty damn short.
>>35935729
>face matters way more than height
It's not that simple. It's a total sum of your character's attribute points. Face being worth the most and height second. For example a Chadlet would be equal to a 6'2" average looking guy.
>>35935815
you're really underrating height there anon
if he really does have a nice face he's more or less tantamount to a 5'9 average imo
watch jacob's ladder, the main character is not even good looking but the fact he's so damn tall makes him so sexy
i'd choose him over the 5'5 chadlet 100/100 times
Pic related is David Kalac. Also known as the 4chan murderer. He killed his gf when she wanted to stop seeing him.
Robots you need to make sure you won't turn out like him. He is the embodiment of 4chan. He posted pics of her dead naked body on /b/ a few years back if anyone remembers.
You don't want to mess your life up like this guy
>>35935656
Anybody got the pics?
>>35935730
I don't have the pictures. But it's the one where in anon says it's hard to choke with a shoestring
I remember that thread and the subsequent photoshops
To all newfags
Eliza is a race mixer, a slut, histrionic, and a sociopath who will manipulate you for beta bucks
Be aware and do not enable this roastie
I don't understand why this bitch is so popular. She looks fucking hideous.
>>35935651
Probably got nigger aids
shes awfully unattractive, how pathetic do you have to be to take her bait
I spent the entire afternoon making warning for a clogged college bathroom stall instead of working on that important essay. How was your day?
>>35935628
A better view of the sign
>>35935628
>the entire afternoon
>>35935653
There are more signs, but I forgot to take photos
WTF is wrong with roasties? White Women are literally out of control. This journalist tried to breastfeed a baby (not her own) without the father's knowledge.
drive by breastfeedings: vastly superior to closeted formula feeding
>>35935598
>This journalist tried to breastfeed a baby (not her own) without the father's knowledge.
You know, this may actually be a criminal offense, because there are a lot of communicable diseases that are passed through breastfeeding. A woman may not even be aware that she's carrying a given disease or infection before she unwittingly passes it on to an infant.
>people still trust (((journalists)))
>white boys can dress like this and still get fine black girls
WHITES CAN'T BE ROBOTS
>>35935550
>black girls
>"fine"
>>35935550
he is tall, slim, has a decent haircut and probably has a 7+ face.
>>35935550
black girls tend to fall for that skinny, tall, but not too fit white boy type. trust me i have a black gf