Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7136. page

>>36050205
as a raging alcoholic i declare you noob

>>36050237
I declare him too autistic to continue living.

>>36050237

i am on and off, i'll usually buy a big bottle of vodka and finish it in half a day, act like a fucking weirdo, pass out, and get another.

repeat for a week or two, then stop with the help of some diazapam or something. i usually stay home though.

>(can't even order pizzas without shaking)
Well you'll need to get over that issue sooner or later. Just force yourself to do it, don't be a pussy.
I mean look where your lack of challenging yourself got you. You have to scramble for very niche jobs that pay shit because you're too big a pussy to look someone in the eye and make small talk.
You have no one but yourself to blame for your problems
>inb4 enabling losers sperg out at me

>>36050174
i will do anything for a job. i just want to support myself.
>look you in eyes
>make small talk
>dress nicely
>be on time
>do my work like nobody's business
had an interview yesterday and did my best. lady interviewing me didn't seem too happy about any of it. made small talk and little joke here and there. she just forced the worst fake laugh ever. how can you give a decent interview if the person interviewing you so obviously doesn't give a fuck?

also, that picture. there's no way anyone is paying 14 bucks for easy data entry.

>>36050255
kind of good advice. if ordering pizza is tough for you, then you really need to work on it. do a push-up (or 5 or 10) to combat some of your nerves. baby steps. start out with little shit, but expect setbacks. it all really sucks man.

>tfw 140 wpm on a good day
Can I get a data entry job with my typing speed alone? no experience or social skills or anything.

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>>36050126
Pic related

This is my genetic composition

>>36050126
Post results for science

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>>36050152
>0.3% Ashkenazi Jewish
>14.8% Sub-Saharan African

for me it's the opposite desu

at least you have good taste with aqua

>>36050091
Female protagonists are good when the plot calls for them.

Since they're weaker and all around less effective than men, a female protag actually makes the stakes higher. A good show with a good plot can make good of a female protag

>Lain
>Kino
>Gunbuster/Diebuster

>>36050083
congrats, i'll go get your medal

Coke is the shittiest drug there is

>Cooked up by some poverty-stricken beaner in Colombia or some shit
>Cut with baby formula and drywall three or four times
>Almost certainly been in someone's ass at one point or another
>The high lasts less than an hour and multiple doses has a pretty steep curve of diminishing returns
>Offensively expensive

Just do MDMA a few times a year, damn.

>>36050083
can you taste the aspirin that was used to cut it?

dumbass

>>36050070
Wow, dude.
If it makes you feel any better, you've made me feel a little less degenerate.

>>36050242
That does make me feel better.

Im a phone fag so I cant do vocaroo but I love you anon and I think you're great

>fat fucks literally believe we cant tell they are fat
i knew you guys were retarded but cmon...

>>36050051
Make a lot of self deprecating jokes about being fat to build the idea in her head

Once you get to the point where you're seeing each other naked, she's probably going to be pretty accepting of how your body looks. Nobody's perfect when they're naked. You should be fine, Anon.

AND YOU DON'T SEEM TO UNDERSTAND
googleplsmycommentisoriginal

Who they are?
What are u talking about?

>>36050041
just take me to LFE already

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>tfw INTP
I want to die

tfw ENFP and act like a normie on the outside but on the inside you're a fucking emotional shitstorm

I don't get why you are surprised about that.
>respond a questionnaire based on your personality
>it tells you your personality
It's like telling something you're gay and being impressed when he tells you you suck dicks.

Use your butt?

>>36049984
>masturbate properly
I just want my penis to work normally, man. Even if I got a girlfriend I wouldn't even be able to have sex. I don't want to get a circumcision either and whenever I try stretching my foreskin it always ends up retracting to how it was the next day.

You can still masturbate with phimosis. Unless you have some severely rare extreme case. Just pull the shaft skin up instead of the foreskin down the way cutfags do when they dry-fap. You can still get a full stroke that way and it'll stimulate all the same parts, just in a slightly different way.

>>36049841
Something about a guy critting me with some shit about a guy killing a mouse

>>36049841
>Why man
You could have just let him go
Life isn't like videogames. There's no special evil ending for stupid bad decisions.

Fukk

>I dunno man but why dont you try and find out

A guy on /fit/ was asking if hes life was going to get better or some shit like that if he lifted and a anon said that in response.

>>36049818
Haha, even that wouldn't want to fuck me

>>36049818
This is a very strange photo, im talking about this entire exhibit.

>>36049818
what exhibit is this one and this is original

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>>36049748
Hey, OP. Nice voice. Can you say "My name is Jeff" for me?

>>36049963
In an serious or cringe, memey way?

>>36050003
>In an serious or cringe, memey way?
I'd prefer serious.

>>36049747
Or you can change your name to something that suits you more. Or even let robots decide what your new name will be.

>>36049801
do it, then. Decide my name.

>>36049828
That's too much responsibility, you know. You could use something more generic, like Mark or Paul.

>>36049741
>My kik slave is going to take steroids because he wants to be a dumb muscle boy for me. Talk me out of this.
Make him T block instead and turn him into a cute boy

>>36049756
He wouldn't be a cute boi

Also I already have a couple of those

Also if anyone as some suggestions on what I could make him do I'm listening