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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7045. page

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ITT: Normie problems

>tfw you have to sex them on the first date
while they're fresh and horny because by the second they've decided they want a relationship and withhold sex to get you to commit

Why girls think this is a good idea
13 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36098899
Females are just different creatures anon, they think and feel different than men for many reasons. The important thing to remember is when you get a good one, fuck her as many times as you can before you have kids with her and she procedes to gangbang a pack of niggers while youre working in your cubical
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Weeeeelll it's time for a bump
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>>36099550
>Weeeeelll it's time for a bump

Yeah dude because I fuck girls all the time on the first date. I've fucked hundreds of girls I can't even keep track.

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What height is actually considered Manlet status?
>inb4 "anything under 6'3 is a Manlet"
17 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>36098864
I imagine "manlet" starts at around 5 foot 7.
I'm 5 foot 10 and I've never ever once in my life had a problem getting laid or doing anything at that height.
It's just a meme.
I know a dude that's 5 foot 5, he's tiny, but he's in a band and he's confident... he's not even that attractive... the ladies have always loved him since the days we used to skate at the local skatepark.

Height is a meme.
There might be SOME shallow dickheads that only care about that, but aren't they the kinda people you want to avoid in the first place?

5 foot 9 is worldwide average.
If you're 7 feet tall, fucking COOL, if you're 4 feet tall... FUCKING COOL...

Again... height is a meme.
Penis size is more important than height and I'm just clutching at straws here.
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>>36098864
Depends on what memegraph you follow. 5"10 is either considered king of manlets or not a manlet.
>>
>>36098964
I've refrained from this insult for many years, but you fucking reek of Reddit. Kys fosho.

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I

HATE

BEING

SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRT
46 posts and 12 images submitted.
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>>36098828
try some stretching exercises to lengthen your spine
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>>36098828
Don't fall for the manlet meme, being a tall doesn't mean shit if you're not a chad.

t. 6'1 sperg
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>>36098828
my legs, arms, fingers and toes are all small and i'm still 5'11

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>tfw baldlet
>tfw dicklet
>tfw longtermunemployedlet

post yours robots and tell me how much your life sucks
39 posts and 6 images submitted.
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Imagine if you focused half as much on the good things in your life
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>>36098749
>tfw nutlet
>tfw wristlet
>>
>tfw dicklet
If I'm semi-tall (6'2) and not ugly can I survive? I realize it's probably a meme but I have a huge fear of a girl seeing my dick and just laughing or something.

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>tfw therapist is writing a book about your life and all your ills and embarrassing moments and failures
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36098747
No he's not faggot, stop making shit up
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>>36098755

My therapist is a woman. And yes she is really writing this. She says my problems with social anxiety and depression are a common part of the lives of young American males and those issues have to be dealt with. She asked me permission first and I was too much of a betacuck to say no, and I'm still too scared to tell her to stop writing it.
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>>36098747
demand royalties

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Anyone else here have some period in their life they think they'll never "top"?

It was 2005 for me.

Was getting a lot of respect for my writing. Managed to get a GF by sheer dumb luck (never happened before or since). Was doing well in school. All in all I felt optimistic, like I could take on the world.

Then it all kinda fell apart and I haven't really found anything to replace it with. My current life isn't exactly terrible it just doesn't have that sense of direction and purpose. I still reminisce about those years, especially that one GF experience I had.

Getting old sucks.
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Peaked Early = normie or failed normie
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I think my peak was so low I didn't notice it.
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>>36098730
my body literally looked like this to my mid/late-teens, the result of skating, bmx-ing, kinda watching my diet, but lately I'm drinking all the time , eating fast food all the time, & I've blimped out
>girls f*kn loved me being that thin even tho I'm not even that cute, I smashed about 14 in 3 years, >lately I'm just a depressed weepy ugly fatto
>just kil me already

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I just want to say God bless to my fellow Christians and Have a nice day to the none Christians~
Also polite Christianity thread?
94 posts and 23 images submitted.
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>>36098590
My faith is shakey but that's probably just due to my crippling depression. I still go to church and enjoy the sermons
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>>36098590
>>36098590
I'm catholic

Deus vult.


What do you want to talk about?
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i live very much like a christian monk
except i am resolute nihilist and black-metal tier religion destroyer

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>be autistic
>play a joke on a "friend" and need a way to make it seem like Im not home
>pretend to be working
>"friend" is also working
>dunno how to start a conversation about how Im working, so I say "hey mind if i come ever during my break? haha"
>"sure"
>oh fuck

What good excuse can I use as a reason I cant actually come over to his work during my break? Please help an autist in need
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36098509
And that would be why you shouldn't lie about stupid shit.
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>>36098578
i know. im actually autistic and this guy is the only person i know that tolerates me please i need an excuse
>>
"i have off from work for a couple hours, wanna chill at my place or your place?"

lol how do u not know how to talk
"hey mind if i come over during my break? haha" is just fine.
Just because u have ass burgers doesn't mean that you have to let it become a self-fulfilling prophecy of being socially retarded.

So I just got a dry herb vape and was wondering if you had any advice o get the most out of my herb


also explain inhaling to me like I'm a 5 year old. would appreciate
8 posts and 2 images submitted.
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This product is not intended for use with illegal substance.
This product automatically scans any herbal materials inserted into the chamber. If THC or other illegal substance this product will turn into a distress beacon, attracting the attention of the local police department.
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>>36098682
I'm going to assume he wasn't dumb enough to buy a non-jailbroken one.
>>
yeah don't use a Pax. Made a bad mistake of buying one from their website and the police ended up catching me. Nobody told me about the fucking scanner.

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What feeling does this ad evoke in you?
10 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>If you touch me tyrone my boyfriend Xian Xing Chang will fuck you up, got it?
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>>36098393
Now accepting cards and blacks at the local run n tug
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>>36098393
>Why is this slave speaking to me?

>you walk inside and find a woman tied up with her bare feet exposed
>she says you can torture her feet anyway you want
What do you do?
28 posts and 10 images submitted.
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>>36098368
Ignore her feet and eat her ass
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ain't nobody got time for this shit
*dump some peanut butter on her soles and let fido go to town*
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>>36098394
Ignore her ass and eat her feet.

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I love you guys, do you love me too?
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Cool cat loves you!
>>
fuck no retard
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>>36098324
I love the idea of you, but I probably wouldn't love you irl
>o heck, all right, I love you

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>its a be mean and hostile on 4chan cause I'm in a bad mood episode

I'm sorry anons
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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You are a waste fellow and this thread is also a waste fellow. I
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>>36098303
Learn how to type a coherent sentence retard
>>
Confess your sins anon. Link or greentext your previous aggressions.

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what type of tendies do robots prefer?
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36098234
>fish tendies

Absolutely disgusting. Kill yourself plz.
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>>36098234
Katsu tendies
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>>36098268
>he doesn't like fish with tartar sauce

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Noodle arms edition

>tfw thought you were supposed to go all the way to the ground when doing pushups
>finally realized why I couldn't do any
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Ask questions give tips advice stories
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but you're supposed to go as low as possible with your arms forming a rectangle? pushups are only good for being able to do pushups anyway (its still the only thing i do)
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>>36098675
Military pushups are retarded.

You're supposed to keep your elbows against your sides and rock your torso up and down like an autist.


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