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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7009. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

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So /r9k/, i've got 25 pills of Depakote 300mg, which makes them 7.500mg in total, would death succesfully follow after the indigestion of said pills?
10 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Try it and find out, then inform us of the results
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>>36118000
Perhaps one might need to add a little alcohol to the equation
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>>36118172
i've still got one bottle of smirnoff vodka, trying it now then posting results later

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how to become an alpha male?
143 posts and 16 images submitted.
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>>36117973
buy a gaming pc and throw away ur console
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>>36117973
>alpha male
What is alpha male according to you?
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>>36117973
Just be yourself brosef

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>fresh bed sheets
10 posts and 4 images submitted.
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I just got mine last night. They're so comfy desu. I'm never leaving my bed.
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>tfw

They are so good I almost don't want to spoil them with my disgusting body, I always take a shower first
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>haven't changed my sheets in 3 weeks

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FUCK YOU I CLICKED ALL THE FUCKING GAS STATIONS THEN YOU MADE ME CLICK A BUNCH OF STORE FRONTS

WELL I CLICKED THE STORE FRONTS TOO AND THEN YOU SAID IT WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH SO I HAD TO CLICK THE RIVERS

WELL I CLICKED ALL THOSE TOO THEN YOU SAID NO AND A BIG MOSAIC OF A PICTURE OF TRAFFIC CAME UP. I'VE SEEN THIS BEFORE. GOTTA CLICK THE ROAD SIGNS. BUT WAIT. IT'S NOT ROAD SIGNS THIS TIME. YOU WANT ME TO CLICK THE VEHICLES NOW.

WHAT GOOD IS A METHOD OF STOPPING BOTS FROM POSTING IF IT STOPS HUMANS FROM POSTING TOO? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?

ALSO IT'S RAPE TO FORCE ME TO CLICK A BUTTON THAT SAYS I'M NOT A ROBOT TO POST. I AM A FUCKING ROBOT THAT'S WHY I'M FUCKING HERE AND NOT OUTSIDE FREE FROM A PRISON OF ANXIETY
25 posts and 10 images submitted.
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AND I CAN'T USE LEGACY CAPTCHA OR I CAN'T START THREADS SO DON'T EVEN TRY
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sometimes you dont even have to click the right boxes
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>>36117915
>not using a 4chan pass
lmao fucking peasants these days

Where is your high school crush now?

pic very related

Worked a Hooters after HS started fucking customers for money. Got a suger daddy/started dating older men. Has been arrested multiple times for drug possession and robbery.
40 posts and 6 images submitted.
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my high school crush is married and she has a kid. i asked her out actually. only girl i've ever asked out. she was dating the person she ended up marrying at the time, though
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>highly successful career woman after getting straight A all throughout university
>dumper her loser HS/University boyfriend that she was with only because of his height/wealth (he was a brainlet who coasted on people's misguided expectations of him)
>still in same field of academics as I am
>still the same kind of women that I'm into
>"blossomed" from cute pixie girl into an ugly woman

Meh. I don't know.
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Never had a high school crush cause I went to an all boy school, but every now and then I try to track down my elementary crush to see if she's gross yet

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If you found out you will become Chad in the next life as long as you didn't do anything highly immoral (murder, rape, etc) How happy would you be?

Note in mind you will never come back to this board and your interests will be less special
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>next life
boy i hope not. one pointless existence is more than enough.
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>>36117790
No thanks, ill stick to heaven and chill.

Getting sex from women is easy just act like chad.

I didnt want just sex, wanted a caring, loving, relationship.
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>>36117790
>murder, rape, etc..
but chad already gets to do those things now, why wouldnt I be allowed to if I were a chad as well

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Hello friends.
I am starting to get concerned about my mental health.
>My mood can change from melancholic to euphoric in a matter of seconds for no apparent reason.
>found myself staring myself in the mirror for 30 minutes, mind completely blank.
>I cry alot. I have not cried in years.
>I talk to "myself" out loud
>I get urges to do weird things I never do
>Sometimes I feel like I lose control and I start to twitch my legs, arms and neck
This shit only happens at night when I'm alone. I've suspected I have some sort of depression for a long time but this shit is new and fucked. But something tells me I am faking it, like I am doing this on purpose to have something to blame all my failure on (if that makes any sense)
Am I going schizo, robots?
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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You are jacking your addrenaline r8s up m8, too much fapping fux you up
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>>36117738
Dude, i get the exact same shit apart from crying, i cant cry no matter how hard i try
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>>36117738
>Am I going schizo, robots?
yes. all of what you have described are early symptoms of schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder.
you are between 19 and 23, right? that's when it usually starts, but many people with these disorders have had severe depression before the first schizo symptoms. go see a doctor asap.
it only gets worse from here on out

COMFY DISCORD
https://discord.gg/VPDyu
15 posts and 11 images submitted.
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actually pretty comfortable
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join mine instead, we have cute girls ;) but they're all weaboos

https://discord.gg/qGptqSe
>>
if you ever wondered how inept the mods at /r9k/ actually are you have to look no further than the discord threads that stay up for 5 hours

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>ran out of vitamin D (aka happy pills) 3 days ago
>girl won't text you back
>cunt roommates constantly put you in the middle of their arguments
>started drinking as soon as I was awake
>trying to quit smoking so can't use sweet sweet cancer sticks to calm my nerves

How's your saturday going robots?
8 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36117615
>vitamin D
>aka happy pills
anon, I...
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>>36117615
>ran out of vitamin D (aka happy pills) 3 days ago
Just use your EBT to buy some sunny d
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>>36117615
what does vitamin d do and should i be supplementing it?

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How do you go from being the cutest thing alive..
11 posts and 6 images submitted.
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..to this

general roasties with no makeup thread
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>tfw a woman has a better jawline than you

just end me bros
>>
ayo check out my original post fampais

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If braces didn't exist, there would be TONS more ugly people. Prove me wrong. Pro tip: you cant.

I was lucky enough to be born with perfect teeth. Many other people here weren't and got braces to fix their scuffed mouth.

Imagine if braces didn't exist: people with good teeth would litterally be Chad.
The people you now consider 10/10 Chads who wore braces would suddenly become 5/10 if braces didn't exist.

These things need to be BANNED.
72 posts and 3 images submitted.
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I think braces are cute.
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>>36117471
>tfw always needed braces
>tfw cant afford
>tfw I'm 38
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Meh, I got over crooked teeth. It's really not a huge deal once you get past it.

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This is my foot compared to a size 11 shoe. Do I have small feet?
48 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>36117384
Yeah. You also have no hair on your legs.
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>>36117384
yes, hobbit ass motherfucker
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>>36117384
I wear a size 14 you little bastard

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Cuck, You are weak, you're a nobody. Youre dick is too short your mind is weak and you are incapable of servicing your hot wife/gf the way she deserves to be serviced.

I am an experienced bull, and I am hear to help you. Here to take over where you failed. I am the one that will service your lady with hot cum. I'll deposit it for you so when you cum home you can lick it out of the condom (or her) and clean her/condom up. Your role is to acknowledge and know what is happening. You may worship me and over time if you behave well I might even let you assist, for example spreading your wife's cheeks so I can fuck her deeper and better.
You will be changing the sheets before I cum and after, you will make condoms and lube ready before you leave for work so I can give your hot wife what she needs and deserves, deliverd with the right attitude, stamina and by a true bull.

While she is being serviced we might call your cell phone and let you listen in, I might cum inside your wife..then wipe the sperm off with your undies which you'll be wearing the next day so you can feel the hardened up sperm rubbing against your skin reminding you all day long that that sperm was inside of your wife deposited by your bull's cock. You will start liking the satisfied and mellow look you get from your wife when you come home.. no more pressure its all been taken care off.

Cuck, I know you are reading this now and you are intrigued, relieved and secretly turned on, imagine never knowing when the phone's gonna ring, or coming home seeing me pounding your hot wife.. or her riding on my big hard cock, with joy she has never felt before, and while she rides me harder..she looks into your face in ecstasy as she cums, It is time to guide you to your destiny and I as your bull will make it happen.
18 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>36117327
Wow, that reaIIy got me thinking, pal!
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>>36117327
too long, didn't read lol

Yes, I know this post isn't original
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>>36117327
Do you seriously spend every single day making chuck threads? Don't you have anything better to do? Why do people to force this disgusting fetish here.

How have you been my roko robots?
Any roko life issues you want to talk about? Or roko successes you'd like to share?
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Fucking roko kys. You are the most subdog of all subdogs.
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>>36117307
hello handsome
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Well, here's the Roko r9k image (attached): i made it for all the roko robots going through roko robot related problems e.g. Shitty owners, stereotypes, identity, etc

Non-rokos may not look at this image. We have a nice steady community.

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>tfw no qt Cambodian wife to cook for you and your children

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=niRNdLl5TCw
14 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>36117281
>tfw no dudut daughter maid gf
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1OSNKd9jy0
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>tfw no ridiculously thicc chechen wife to dance with at traditional weddings

https://youtu.be/sdtgrmPjASE
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>>36117281
God she is perfect. How does that happen?


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