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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6981. page

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I hope all of you are doing alright out there. I know you can make it through the day and i beleive in you. You are all my friends because i know,even if you are hostile to me,you guys will be there for me. Just like i will be there for you. Have a nice day.
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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I mean it. All of you deserve to be happy and if i had a say in it i would make you happy,or atleast try.
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cute original cat anon
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That is a cute cat

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>Spend years thinking I look decent enough in the mirror
>Find out at some point that mirrors are not legit, find a double mirror instead that shows how you truly look
>Left eye is a good inch higher than right eye, look like a deformed retard

Anyone else have any moments that crumbled what remained of their self esteem?
18 posts and 2 images submitted.
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wtf is this double mirror you speak of?
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>>36133353
this

I want to know about the double mirror and robot wont let me
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Had you never seen a picture of yourself? I doubt it's that bad.

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>brother said he was gonna have a party and not to tell mum
>"you can invite your friends if you want to"
>"oh h-heh my friends don't like partying"
>"no problem!"

he definitely knew I was lying and that I actually just have no friends. Fuck my life.
15 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36133163
Why aren't you just being honest towards him?
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Should have invited a bunch or craigslist weirdos to fuck things up.
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>>36133163
Why try to hide the truth from your brother? My little brother is only in highschool and is very popular but he's pretty nice to me about my friendless neet status.

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all Staceys should be forced to date at least one robot in their lifetime. (we need laws on our side)
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36133131
Okay tell me robot, what would you do with her? Let's say that she is assigned to you by police, she comes to your house, now what?

You don't know, and that's why you are a robot
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>>36133827
>what would you do with her?
Cuddle!
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>>36133131
>all Staceys should be forced to date at least one robot in their lifetime.

This isn't fair though. It doesn't guarantee that all robots will receive dates. I imagine they'll just fuck around with the definition and go out with the same good looking cyborg leaving us all alone.

They really have to guarantee that everyone gets a chance.

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>So Anon what do you want to do on this sunny Sunday ?
>We could go biking together and stop to picnic in the park !
>Or we could go by the lake, swim a little and then sleep all afternoon !
>I'd be happy with anyhting as long as it is with you Anon !
43 posts and 11 images submitted.
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>>36133048
We're gonna take a nap in a field after staring at the clouds and cuddling.
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nah I'm just gonna play vidya you do whatever you want
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>>36133048
>this look is the last thing you see before she plucks your eyes out and eats them

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Who here /polyphasic/?

I tried to start doing 3 hours sleep plus 2 30 min naps a few days ago, but I fucked it up. Now I'm going to stay up for a few days straight with caffeine, to force myself into instant REM when I crash, as REM sleep is the part that refreshes you.

It could be the perfect hikki lifestyle, as you could theoretically lower our sleep schedule to around 2 hours, maximizing time awake with no socializing to inhibit.

Advice on how to get into this? It's fucking hard.
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36133045
Its not good long term but short term.
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>>36133076
That's what I've heard. Not op, but I'd love to push the limits of sleep as much as possible without losing brain power, what should I do? I currently sleep 8 hours a day and feel just fine every morning, but could I bring that down to 7? Maybe even to 6 plus a nap in the afternoon?

After all, every hour saved could add up to a lot more things accomplished throughout the day plus entire months of your life saved through time. On the average month, an hour saved every day gives you back an entire 1.25 days
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>>36133178
I know, imagining the saved time I can get is fucking amazing. I'm a loser, but I'm not as miserable as most of you guys on here, I want to be awake to enjoy all the anime, drawing and vidja I can.

I could move down to 6 without naps in the past, albeit a little groggily. Try doing core sleep midnight to six, with a half-hour nap in the middle of the day (perhaps around 3).

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>can only fap to porn where there is cum involved(like creampies, cum in mouth, cum between tits, etc)
>tell myself its because I like to self-insert as the guy and imagine myself cumming like in the video
>unmute the video just to hear his moans when approaching orgasm, for self-inserting purposes, of course
What if what I really like is seeing the dudes feeling pleasure? Porn without the ending part is just boring for me. Am I gay, guys? Or is the self-insert thing legit? Will nofap save me and make me enjoy normal porn again or am I doomed forever?
18 posts and 1 images submitted.
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You can only cum to porn you can relate to which is why you prefer seeing a penis ejaculating. You'd even jerk off to porn that's just a guy jerking off or getting a handjob because you can relate to it.

You are straight. You're just not offended by the sight of another man's cock . :)
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>>36133107
>You'd even jerk off to porn that's just a guy jerking off
Admitely i fapped to guys fucking fleshlights, but its totally not gay am i right?
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>>36133012
lots of people insert themselves into the situations happening in the porn scene to turn themselves on. Its normal

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Friend Finder thread.

>Location, including Area Code
>Gender and sexual orientation
>Age
>How easy are you to chill with? Car/Job?
>What would your ideal time hanging out be?
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Are aussies allowed?
If so sydney
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>>36132993

>Location, including Area Code
USA, Connecticut, 860

>Gender and sexual orientation
Male, straight

>Age
23

>How easy are you to chill with? Car/Job?
In between jobs right now but I'm not normally NEET. I should be employed again in a week or two. Yes I have a car and a license.

>What would your ideal time hanging out be?
That depends on who I'm with. If its a guy, video games, drinking, playing music (I play instruments), whatever. If its a girl then pretty much the same stuff, but if we are a couple then throw sex in there.
>>
>London
>Male, Straight
>18
>NEET
>I have no idea

Why are a lot of people easily impressed by mediocrity?

pic related
40 posts and 7 images submitted.
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>>36132992
They are called normalfaggots.
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>>36132992
>above average looking human
>performing with an instrument
>mediocrity
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>>36132992
Because they never even get that far themselves.

When I have a shower I face my back to the water and let the water hit the top of my neck for a good 10 minutes before actually showering.
13 posts and 5 images submitted.
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When I cant get my ass completely clean after shitting and dont have access to a shower, i slide a wad of toilet paper between my asscheeks and leave it there until i gotta shit again.
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I spend 95% of the time in the shower, just getting wet and thinking and then soap up, rinse and dry off in like 1 minute.
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Most of the time I use my desktop computer laying on the bed(pic related).
I really need to stop this, its making me reach new levels of sedentarism

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Alrighty boys, what's the best way to induce cancer?
27 posts and 9 images submitted.
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>>36132963
reading 90% of r9k's threads
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>>36132982
Do you have any serious suggestions?
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>>36133069
Yes, but the Hippocratic Oath prevents me from sharing them with you, anon

So what are you reading robots? In a lull between heavier reads, I happened to come across pic related and I'm having monstrous amounts of fun with it.
Also trying to keep going through Carlos Castaneda's writings, currently on Journey to Ixtlan: better written than the previous books, less covert in its didactical aims. Still, very, very beautiful and useful.
A bunch of essays on Galileo and his social life in the Medici's court for uni, and that's me done

What about you?
13 posts and 7 images submitted.
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>>36132877
So you're reading basic 16yo normie shit.
I mean, good for you.
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>>36132877
I haven't read any books in a long time
The last one i read was probably Macbeth for a project
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>>36133206
normie?

I made 2 normies read this book and they dont understand it , they feel disgusted by it.

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I masturbate 20 times a day to deal with the fact that I do nothing all day and cry - I also randomly split personalities and mental breakdowns where I change my voice, repeat myself and punch myself in the head over and over aren't uncommon.

AMA (assuming I remember I created this thread and didn't procrastinate on YouTube once again)
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36132869
Do you like traps? Why?
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>>36132869
you can make a good scientific material. Considered joining some experiment?
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>>36132895
No, I have a long distance relationship gf and when I jerk off, I pretend I'm having passionate sex with her.

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Whenever someone treats me badly, insults me or disrepects me

remember that germans just bullied jews before 1934, then started putting them in concentration camps

message: if someone is "against" you, he will have no regrets in torturing you in all the ways he can

now he may just don't borrow you his phone charger (or whatever), but tomorrow he may lie in front of a judge if they think you did a crime or whatever

so remain vigilant
14 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>36132850
I'm not even sure I know what you want me to be vigilant of?
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>>36132881
don't ever be in a situation where someones who "treats you badly" can decide over your life

if you go out with him and you both see a crime

and the judge ask your friends who did it

he will say it was you

he doesn't mind you have to go to jail 15 years just because you stole his pen or whatever

people are vegenful
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>>36132850
someone borrowed your phone charger and didn't return it?

How many Jack-In-The-Box tacos can you eat in a single sitting?
9 posts and 1 images submitted.
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zero because i have some self respect fatty
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None cause I live on the east coast.
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>>36132747
Ten. Ten is a safe number. I can waste four in the blink of an eye and still have room. Given the right amount of weed, and I would easily be able to put down ten. Maybe twelve, really depending on the time of day. So twelve. Or fifteen. If I've had an active day, and I'm stoned I could probably eat fifteen or twenty.


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