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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6720. page

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>it's another whopper from burger king episode
11 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>it's a wake up from a weird dream and start crying over nothing episode
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>it's a deploy the garrison episode
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>it's another die in a dream and think you've awoken to nothingness again

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>tfw you'll never be a skinny girl
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>>36280979
Nigga that's what we call a failed abortion
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>>36280979
I feel this feel. I wanna be a legal loli body type.
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oh my god that body looks disgusting. women are lucky that men have such a diverse taste in women, aka women are lucky men are so desperate for vagina.

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>tfw redpilled
>tfw nigger

how do I exist like this?
14 posts and 1 images submitted.
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You don't kill yourself nigger
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>>36280971
Learn to use a comma faggot
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>>36280951
The redpill is a coping mechanism for weak spineless faggots on reddit. Stop falling for the meme.

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So i got curious and went to /soc/ and jeez there are so many fairly well adjusted normal people there...

Anyway so here I am back to this place, morbidly depressed alone, blah blah. Im home /r9k/.

So how is everyone elses friday night going, im in la hoping NK roasts me and this city alive.
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36280848
im not two far from a major city, a little ways east of you. i could actually drive to la in a few hours(if i had a car.) praying for death atm.
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>>36280848
>/soc/
What did you expected.

Anyway, could something happen to San Diego or Tijuanafags?

A-Asking for a friend.
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>>36280938
Nah, I seen the reach of their missles and it wouldn't reach. However, if one of their subs can get near by maybe they would try to strike the naval and marine bases in San Diego.

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robots are trash

t. fembot
14 posts and 3 images submitted.
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thats not nice

origaaaanao
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Yes they are. Now get on your knees and suck my dick.
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>>36280791
You're right but not a fembot so it doesnt matter

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Goodnight /r9k/


I hope you sleep well, and you have sex with your waifu in your dreams.
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36280790
I'd like to visit your pic in my dreams
I hate cities irl but dream cityscapes are always so nice
Goodnight OP
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>>36280790
My waifu is to pure and I am also too pure to want sex in my dreams.
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>>36280790
Thanks nigga, same to you.

Oyasumi
>>36280834
She will eventually have her needs though.

But you will eventually realize later on.

How do I get laid at a party?
22 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>36280776
Talk to drunk girls.
Don't sperg out too much.
Make/let them get drunker.

With a bit of luck if they enjoyed your company and are drunk enough they'll let you fuck them.
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They should make a version of Blacked where they just use dorky fat black dudes instead of basketball players
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>>36280838
What if I like to talk about 9/11 conspiracy theories when I'm drunk

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Los Angeles here, is Kim going to nuke us tomorrow?
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Shit I hope the radiation doesnt reach Van Nuys

We'd get like fucking super mutants here
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Maybe. Maybe San Diego though.
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Would it be better to stay near the ocean or go up into the mountains?

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Any normies in here willing to give some advice?
Is life truly better with a girlfriend? Are there any legitimate reasons to have one? How do you know if a girl is somebody that would be worth spending your life with?
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36280700
>Is life truly better with a girlfriend?
Yeah. Not feeling like a total fucking loser does wonders.

Everything else kinda sucks I guess. Even sex. When you've masturbated your whole life sex barely does it.
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>>36280700
Yeah. It's like having a buddy that's always around but no one calls you gay because of it.
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>>36280700
>Is life truly better with a girlfriend?
Yes but no, it could make your life worse if it's not the right girl and could make you really kill yourself.
But everyone knows a woman is not worth yourl life but there are some retards here and there.

>Are there any legitimate reasons to have one?
Other than not dying alone, getting love and loving, no.
But one can live a good life alone, but eventually it will hit you not having a son or a wife, but you could always get that expensive surrogacy and have your own son without a wife.

>How do you know if a girl is somebody that would be worth spending your life with?
Is faithful, kind, sweet, good with kids, can cook, loves you sincerely, does post pics about you, love quotes, and finally she isn't into that "free love" shit and is really jealous when you talk with a (pretty) girl in general.

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The reason women like men who aren't virgins is because they're insecure about their number.
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>>36280637
what number anon?
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My number is good though, it has two sets of dubs
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>>36280637
Or it could be because virgins get clingy and emotional after their first, and only the lowest grade human would want to deal with that shit.

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Is it possible for a robot to become a marine?

I've been thinking about going into the military, since it doesn't seem like I'm going anywhere in life.

What are some options to get in shape?

What do I do if my parents will disown me if I join the military?
10 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36280544
What are you more interested in? The stereotypical military "get yelled at all the time, live in the shit" or the "travel around the world, get some direction in life, get valuable training"?

I know Marines, you have to be a certain kind of person to enjoy being a Marine. You can most certainly do it, the physical standards to be one, along with all other branches, is dog shit easy. I would personally recommend the Navy for someone interested in life after the military as it will give you direction and purpose, but we gotta have Marines too.

To hell with your parents if they disown you for wanting to join the military. They are selfish pricks, and probably too stupid to realize that there are jobs other than infantry, it isn't all Full Metal Jacket.

If anything, I'd recommend more kids look into the military before committing to college. It is a great opportunity to mature, get some direction in life, and will pay for your schooling when you're out.

I wish you luck, and if you're serious about the Marines then get in touch with a recruiter and get some more info about enlisting. Just don't believe everything your recruiter tells you, do your own research and don't feel pressured to do anything he tells you to do.
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>>36280544
>Everyone showers together
>Your shame is showing
>A bot (not a robot) would cringe at this though
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Hey OP, I've been a poolie since January and I'm going to boot camp the day after tomorrow.

Yes, its possible. My mom cried for 2 days when I told her I was going to talk to a recruiter.

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Do you ever have really disturbing nightmares? What about? I had one today. Nothing bloody or weird but I was an astronaut and flying all over the solar system and an alien transmission was picked up that was doing nothing but sending 24/7 navpoints of my exact location in my space. No one would figure out why the aliens kept sending my coordinates. I was being tested but everything came up normal. I started to go insane.

The universe is so big does anyone find that extremely scary?

I need mental help btw.

Any creepy dreams?
19 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36280536
I want to fuck a grey
Also why can no one get the mouth and head right except like what you just posted
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>>36280536
I think sleep paralysis are worse than nightmares personally
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I keep getting shot

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It hurts me that my dad refuses to accept my autistic younger brother. Not only because of his autism, he believes that he is not the father of my younger brother (he kept saying that, he was a son of our deceased family driver). But I couldn't blame my dad to feel that way because my mom is a cheating whore. I really hate women. The way my dad looks at the my younger bro is in disgust. He hasn't seen him for more than 7 years in fact, he just saw him today and I don't like the way he acts around the poor kid. He even made him go home after a few minutes of staying in his place.
13 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36280505
So, is that autist your father's son or not?

He will obviously hate him more because biologically the autist is not your father's son, so obviously there will be a lot of hate than usual OP.


IF your autistic brother is actually your father's son, then he might be a little fucked up or something.
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>>36280505
Did yout dad take a DNA test or he just thinks the kid isn't his son ? kill your mother for me please
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>>36280775
I think so? My autist bro uses my father's surname and my dad was the one on his birth certificate. I have a strong feeling that he's my sibling but my dad is still skeptical about it since my mom cheats on him. That just makes me sad.

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What should I put in my craigslist post?

Firstly i'd like to say i've tried posting on craigslist a bunch of times and out of any method of getting a girl this has lead to the closest times i've gotten in recent years to getting a girlfriend so anyone recommending anything else please don't because i've likely tried it and it didn't work.

Clarifications about myself and the general gist of the post:
I'm a typical /r9k/ type. 5'5, Average Looks, Overweight, NEET, 20 Years old, Lives with parents, No Car, Small Peen (But they'll never have to know till its too late :^))

I have 0 Standards (wasn't always this way) and i've been trying to find a girlfriend nonstop since I was 16 (4 years straight) with no avail. Once I hit 18 obviously I went to more online methods like Tindr, Badoo, Etc still nothing. I've tried different personality types, pictures, etc. Tried copying successful profile bios, posts, etc

Even when I get a reply it generally doesn't last long no matter how hard I try.

I live in a very Liberal lefty part of America (Yes I know this is the reason I can't get a girlfriend you don't have to tell me twice I know the sexual market is fucked in these kinds of places but I have no fucking money so please don't suggest moving either because I can't do that)

Anyways TL;DR i've tried making tons of posts on craigslist and even when i'm completely honest on there I do get replies from real girls unlike dating apps so its clearly the right choice.

Basically I think the way I post tho is fucking it up so i've come here for help. As I know many of you are familiar with situations like this maybe you can help me.

I'm not a robot by choice and yes i'm incel. I want a girlfriend, a long term relationship, kids, a good life and I need help. I know /r9k/ isn't exactly the best place to ask for help in this kinda situation but its all I got so please.

Can you help me make a post on craigslist. I just need the text part I already got the pics covered obviously.
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Fuck man, this shit is hard to read.
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>>36280478
Tis life man
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I've talked to girls on there before. A lot of times they genuinely seem very mean and judgemental. Anyway>>36280460
>Anyways TL;DR i've tried making tons of posts on craigslist and even when i'm completely honest on there I do get replies from real girls unlike dating apps so its clearly the right choice.
you answered your own question
>>36280460
>I'm not a robot by choice and yes i'm incel. I want a girlfriend, a long term relationship, kids, a good life and I need help. I know /r9k/ isn't exactly the best place to ask for help in this kinda situation but its all I got so please.
just drop the robot and incel shit, it's just shallow stereotypical memes

>get so angry you bite down and chip your teeth
>this is "funny" to normalfags
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>>36280426
That shit is funny to me to be perfectly honest.
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>>36280462
How about I just bite YOU? Huh? How would that be?
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>>36280426
>REEEEEEEEEEE so hard you injure yourself
kekkle


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